eCre Orang am• Act. 9
«Y
ou want me to talk about the girl Fujiwara dated before you?!», Yukino looked puzzled at me. «Yes, please», I begged her to give me a hand in what had become an obsession. «I’ve been attending this school only since April, unfortunately I don’t know anything about any back story» «Fujiwara’s always been very popular, but I don’t remember seeing her go steady with anyone in particular. Anyone but Yamato, obviously», she crossed her arms, brooding. «Tell me, is there any sort of problem between you two?» «Oh, no... not really, it’s just that... I had some weird dreams» «Weird dreams? Miyuki, do you want an advice? Let go the past and just think about what you’re living now», Yukino encouraged me. «What about the two of us go out to eat in the open air? Today there’s a really nice sunny day», she winked. «Yeah, you’re right. Let’s go out», I smiled at her. While I was about to stand up, I felt a hand leaning on my shoulder, I turned and saw Rei beside me. «Can I talk to you?», she kindly asked. «I’m going to eat lunch, is it urgent?» «Kaneda-san, can I be excused for the intrusion?», she said to my best friend. «Sure, you’re the class rep, after all», replied Yukino, lifting her hands up. «See you later», she left, and at that point I couldn’t do anything but follow Rei. «Where are we going?», I asked her, a bit annoyed. «What a question to ask, we’re going to my “super attic”!», she laughed taking suddenly my hand, dragging me up the stairs. «Hey, what’s wrong with you?», I tried to complain. When the roof door opened, the blue sky hit us and the summer breeze welcomed us caressing our faces. «Come», she said, keeping on holding my hand as I saw her doing with the girl in my dream. «What’s gotten into you?» I wriggled. 208
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«Don’t be nervous», she said showing me to sit on the low wall beside her. «Here, look», she opened her bento. «Pan roasted noodles?», I noticed. «Yes, I brought one for you, too. You need to taste it, it’s delicious!», she smiled. «Does this mean that you called me out to have lunch together?», «Of course, Yumiko-san prepared this delight this morning, so I decided to bring one more portion», she handed me over another box. «Thanks... but, how did you know that I wouldn’t have been with Misto?», I decided to comply her picking the lunch, Asakawa’s housekeeper prepared, from her hands. «I didn’t», she shrugged. «Rei!», I cried out on impulse. «Oh, come on! We’re doing nothing wrong, aren’t we?», she made an arch smile and started eating. I followed her lead, a bit reluctantly though. «Damn, it’s so good!», I exclaimed with surprise after the first bite. «What did I tell you?», «You know I shouldn’t be here, though...», I sighed, putting the bento aside. «Miyuki, please... you promised me that you would’ve eaten lunch together with me, remember? » «No, I don’t», I glanced at her. «Alright, sorry. Don’t just leave me eating everything by myself now, though, it’s a waste throwing all this food», she said tilting her head on the side. Her blue eyes captured me right away. «Fine», I started to eat again keeping my head low. Rei laughed again: it was strange to see her so happy... «You can taste these, too», I offered to her what I brought from home in exchange. «You made all of this, didn’t you?», she picked with the sticks an omelet roll. «It’s delicious, Miyuki, your cooking is amazing!», she narrowed her eyes. «Usually, you don’t seem much a food lover, you know?» 210
«The fact that I can’t cook as well as you do doesn’t mean that I don’t like to eat the good stuff», she replied keeping on tasting what I had cooked. «I didn’t mean anything like that, I was just referring to your figure. You’re so slender» «Well, you’re the same as me. Maybe... we burn fat quickly», she said in an arch tone. «Why are you acting like this?», I closed the empty bento box. «Oh, come on. It was just a joke», she giggled. «Don’t play dumb», I looked at her with a serious expression, standing up fast. «Can you explain why I’m here?» «Can’t I invite you to have lunch together?», replied Rei, getting on the defensive. «You know what I mean», I stared at her clenching my fists. «I’d like to spend more time with you», she got up and came closer slowly. «I thought about what you said and...», she took my hands with hers. «I’d like to prove you that I’m changing, Miyuki», concluded, catching me off guard. «Rei...», I pulled back my hand. «To me it seems like you didn’t get it at all» «Why do you say so?» «If you really care about me, leave me alone!», I looked away and felt my heart beating wildly in my chest. «You must respect the choice I made» «Do you mean that, since you’re with Fujiwara, I can’t talk to or spend some time with you anymore?» «Stop it!», I got angry. «I don’t ever want to witness a scene like the one that happened on Saturday at the shop» «Okay, I’ll try not to upset your precious Fujiwara so deeply anymore», she ironically said. «It’s pointless...», I looked at her being annoyed. «You’ll never change. It’s all just a game for you, isn’t it?» «No, it’s not», she got gloomy. «I’m not playing with you!» «No, uh? What about all that little stunt you pulled? All that stupid and persistent teasing?» 211
«I just made clear with Fujiwara how serious I am!», she exclaimed leaving me breathless. «You... would be serious with me?», an hysterical laughed slipped from me. «Give me a break! Just two month ago you told me that life is all about fooling around, that you don’t believe in love and this kind of feelings. But now, do you want me to believe that’s just the opposite?» «That’s true, I did think that way», she came even closer. «Maybe I had my reasons to say such things... Or maybe it’s easier for you to convince yourself that I’m just shallow, isn’t it?» «That’s your fault. People are judged for how they act, didn’t you know that?» Rei scowled at me: «I never judged anyone» «Yeah, but you didn’t care to use me as a toy and that is even worse!» «You’ve never been a toy!», she grasped my shoulders shaking me. «Why did you kissed me and... touched me without any care for my feelings?», I rant about her. «Because I can’t help but want you!», she retorted out loud. «I want to kiss you even now, to hold you and... is this so wrong?», she fixed her eyes on me. «Of course it is! I’m with another person, did you forget about that?», I moved away getting free from her grasp. «I’m sorry, I... I’ve never felt like this before», she tried to pull herself together. «Really? So, that girl you seduced while she was with Misato, you... didn’t have feelings for her?» Rei opened her eyes wide and her face got pale. «Did Fujiwara tell you that?» «Answer me!» «What did she tell you?», she got upset. «I know that you took her away from her» Rei lowered her eyes, letting her arm slip along her sides: «She told you that?» 212
«Yes. I realized that it’s a painful story and that digging it up would hurt her too much» «Of course... », she slightly laugh. «So, now you’re thinking that this is all just a strategy to pull you away from her, aren’t you?» I looked at her without answering. «Do you really think that I don’t have nothing better to do than to ruin Fujiwara’s life?», she asked me, getting even gloomier in the face. «Shouldn’t I?», I opened my arms. «You stole her girlfriend, had fun with her and then you left her!», I looked at her with disapproval. «And if that wasn’t enough, you also took her best friend away from her and now, coincidentally, you’re hitting on me!» «I see that you already got your own idea...», she pursed her lips. «I’ve never touched a girl... before you, if you want to know the truth» I stood quiet, caught off guard by that new revelation. «Miyuki, I’m not lying to you. You should ask your girlfriend how things really are», she kept going to defend herself. «And about Yamato, it was him who came looking for me. Don’t you think I’ve already paid enough the foolishness of having sex with someone like him?» «Stop using such terms!», I got angry thinking of Rei and Yamato entwined to one another, reflecting on the little mirror. «It is what it is. Just sex! I’ve never hidden behind false morality», she came closer again. «But with you it’s different» «How can I trust you? When you kissed me the first time, didn’t you do it just for having fun and humiliating me?» «No, it’s not!», replied Rei, unyielding. «Do you remember when I took you around the school?», she began, leaving me confused. «Your name recalled me something, then during economy class you said that your parents opened a bakery shop called Paradiso. So, I realized that you were “that” Miyuki, the one with whom I played when I was a child and... from that moment on I started to think about you. I was upset for that, believe me... they were new, strong, unmanageable feelings», her voice cracked. «But then... when you came to me after having beaten Ryo’s friends, just because they had insulted me, I felt an emotion so strong that I couldn’t 213
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hold myself back. That’s why I kissed you!», she breathed. «Did I do it the wrong way? I’m sorry about that. But, now, just tell me something...», she wrapped her arms around me and held me. «... just tell me if what I see lighting up in your eyes when we’re close is the same fire that lights up in mine!», she ended, striking at my heart as only she could. «I already told you... You’re a very attractive girl», I tried to escape her, feeling my body turning on out of my control. «So, it’s just attraction? Nothing else?» «It’s strange to hear you say something like that», I struggled with all my might not to giving in. «Do you really want me to step back?», she touched lightly my face with her hand, keeping on holding me tight. «You have to tell me that», she pressed me noticing I was hesitant. «If you really care about me... yes... please, don’t insist», I felt my eyes burning. «Or we’ll end up hurting each other for real», I looked away. «So, is it true?», her lips widened in a sad smile. «You’re running away...», she softly said while she was picking my chin with her thumb and her index finger. I felt my heart like it was going to explode: I closed my eyes, waiting for a kiss that would never come. «I did promise you... I won’t do it again», she whispered on the edge of my lips. «If you want to go... please, don’t ever look back», she concluded. For an intense moment I got lost in her blue eyes and I was seriously tempted to remove the gap from her lips but, once again, what Misato told me and the dream about that girl came back to trouble me: I would’ve ended up like her? Being fought over between them and then abandoned? That fear ended that debate. I wriggled out from her arms and ran away without turning back anymore, just like Rei had asked. Luckily, the school festival was coming up, the following days we were all fully busy with the arrangements. I was so focused on my extra school activities that I finally managed to keep away from my mind that damn dream and all it came with it. Rei, after that moment on the roof, started to greet me with kindness when we crossed our ways in the classroom or in the hallways, but she didn’t look for me anymore. She stopped ac215
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companying her mother to the pastry shop. Obviously, Misato was really relieved by that, but it left a deep emptiness inside me. «Hey, Miyuki-chan! We need another server of plum cakes!», Yukino called me. Our stand was stormed by people as soon as the festival begun. The whole cooking class group was head over heels. «Oh, darn! Are we already out of them?», I bent down to pick the last server left from the shelf under the counter. «What do we do? Should we go and cook more of it?», another classmate asked, caught by anxiety. «No... we don’t have time», I replied quickly. «But we can show the cakes, too», I took one of them and started slicing it. «But we had to leave them for lunch time, it’s barely half past ten in the morning!», cried out Yukino out of breath. «We don’t have a choice», I said smiling to the people in line. «Ladies and gentlemen, we also have this delicious cake if you like it», I brought out my best smile. «I can tell that you know how to deal with people, Miyuki-chan, you’re very good at it», my best friend came close to me. «Actually, it’s pretty easy» «No, it’s totally not!» «Yes, it is, look...», I pointed all the people in line at the check-out. «They’re all so happy», I giggled. «This is the power of sweets» «You’re amazing», Yukino rejoiced, pleased, when I heard a voice that drew my attention: there was Misato behind my back. «There you are», I went to meet her. «Are you ready for the game of today afternoon?» «Only if you’ll come to cheer for me», she winked. «Of course I’ll be there. They’ll cover my shift here», I smiled and she moved pointing two people who were eating the cake I made. «These are my parents», she started off, flooring me. «A-ah... g-good morning!», I bowed clumsily and hit Yukino’s head. «Good morning, Miyuki-chan, nice to meet you», said Misato’s mother 217
smiling, her father looked pleased, too. «Misato told us so many things about you, why don’t you come over to lunch one of these days?» «Yes... thanks, it’d be an honor», I replied still anxious. «Honey, what a nice girlfriend you found», Misato’s mother started off bringing a hand on her cheek. «Oh, come on, Hitomi-chan, look, you made her uncomfortable», captain’s father laughed finishing his slice of cake. «Congratulations, you’re very good at cooking» «And you should taste her bento, Dad. It’s amazing», Misato overstated. «Wow, a visit by the in-laws», whispered to my ear Yukino and I hit her instantly with my elbow. «I’ll take them around the school, see you later and... keep a slice of cake for me, ok?», Misato clenched my hand before going. «O-Ok...», I replied dazed. «She’s already gone, you know», Yukino shook me by the shoulders. «Here, this the cake for the captain», she hand the plate out to me. «Where do we hide it?» «She didn’t tell me that... her parents... knew about us», I blabbered. «That’s good, isn’t it?», she turned me and looked me in the eyes. «Hey, aren’t you happy?» «Yes... though», I brought my hand on my face which I felt on fire. «I didn’t see that coming» «Come on! Get back to work, now», she pushed me on the back taking me back to my duties and in that moment I saw Rei in the checkout line standing next to a curly brown-haired girl. «Yukino-chan, do you know who the girl standing near the class rep is?», I asked feeling a well-known discomfort on my stomach. «That’s Nagisa Nishie, form third class A. She’s in the student council», replied Yukino staring at them. «They seem close to each other. It’s rare to see Asakawa laughing like that», she made me notice. «Yeah...», I felt the anger growing as soon as the two girls came close. «Good morning, Ikeda-san, Kaneda-san», Rei greeted us politely. «Do you have two orange cream croissants left?», she asked. 218
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«You’re lucky, there are still some», exclaimed Yukino handing the croissants out to the girls. Rei looked toward the other girl again. «What do you think?» «It’s very good!», cried out Nishie. «You were right, Rei-chan» «I’m glad you like it», my beautiful childhood friend gave her a smile. I stood like a fool staring at them until Rei turned toward me: «Congrats, you did really good» «Thank you, Asakawa-san», replied Yukino in my place seeing me on the spot. «What we needed was a nice sweet», Nishie drew the attention. «Good work, girls», she bowed a little, then she touched Rei’s shoulder who glanced at me one last time before following her. “She called her... Rei-chan”, I clenched my hand on my chest confused. «Hey, get that look off your face!», Yukino got angry. «W-What?», I jolted. «Come with me», she pulled me from an arm. «Girls, take over!», she ordered to the group behind us who were wrapping the biscuits in the other gazebo. «Hey! Where are you going?», one of them called us back. «We’re coming back soon», replied Yukino dragging me in a hidden spot of the school. «Yukino-chan, what’s gotten into you?», I got scared when I saw her face tensing up. «What’s gotten into you instead! And don’t tell me lies!» «Nothing!», I lowered my eyes. «Liar!», she accused me. «I don’t know what you’re talking about» «I’m talking about Asakawa, don’t you think I haven’t noticed how you look at her», she floored me. «You’ve changed after you talked to her that day. Every time you meet or she greet you, you suddenly become sad and today... It was crystal clear that seeing her beside that girl bothered you. You’re jealous!» «No, I’m not», I tried to reply. «I’m good with Misato!» 220
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«Stop that, I’m not judging!», she yelled at me and I felt suddenly fragile. «It’s true... I’m good with Misato», I brought my hand on my face bursting into tears. «Miyuki-chan», Yukino’s voice sweetened. «I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to», she tried to wipe my tears. «It’s okay», I pushed her away. «Get back to the stand now» «Wait», she blocked me again. «Asakawa has feeling for you, too, just like Fujiwara... you know that, right?» I didn’t answer. I just looked down on my toes which became more and more blurred. Yukino didn’t say anything anymore. We got back quietly to our work and I tried to focus on that day and on Misato’s game with all my might, but in my head there was plenty of questions which constantly came to mind: Did Rei really have feelings for me? Did she suffer my absence? So what about this third year girl, how much did she care for her? “I got crazy”, I hunched my arms while the whole institute burst into a roar after our girls basketball team won. Misato scored the last three point giving us a wonderful victory. I barely manage to pull myself together and to face my girlfriend who was, obviously, head over heels: «Miyuki, would you come to celebrate with us?», she hugged me. «We’re in the regional semifinals, isn’t that great?» «Yes, I’m happy for you. Sadly I can’t stay, though», I hugged her a bit more. «Is there something wrong?» «No, not at all, but I’m really tired, I’ve been up since 5 this morning, I’m sorry», I explained myself. «Sure, you’re right. Look, I’ll tell the girls that I’m walking you home, ok?», she winked. «No, you need to go with them. You’re the captain, Misato», I hurried and said. «But I want to be with you and then I don’t want you to go home by yourself, you look really exhausted», she worried. 222
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«Don’t worry Fujiwara-san, I’ll walk Miyuki-chan home», Yukino stepped in. «Yes, please, just go and celebrate with the other girls», I stood up on my tiptoes and kissed her on the cheek. «Well then... I’ll call you later, ok?», she smiled at me. «Kaneda-san, I’ll leave her to your care» «No worries, I got her», Yukino lovingly replied. For about half of the way we both didn’t say a word, but then my best friend broke the silence: «I’m sorry about this morning» , she said looking for my eyes. «It doesn’t matter», I sighed. «It’s okay» «Miyuki-chan», she grabbed my hand. «I acted that way because I love you», she explained feeling sorry, then we stopped and stared at each other. «I know, Yukino-chan, I love you too. You’re My best friend», I smiled at her. «I’m sorry that I made you worry, but... what I told you this morning is true, I’m good with Misato», I said firmly. «Don’t get me wrong, you and Fujiwara are a beautiful couple, I supported you from the first day, you know it» I nodded. «But...», she paused. «Your eyes... they’re so different when...» «Please, say no more», I blocked her, feeling the pain making its way in my chest. «I don’t know what you could’ve detected, but between Rei and I there’s nothing. It couldn’t be in any case because Misato is the one who makes me feel safe» «It’s just that so? You’re with Fujiwara only because she makes you feel safe?», she widened her eyes. «I like Misato» «You don’t have to convince me», she stared at me. «I don’t trust Rei!», I cried out in the end, feeling fragile again. «She... scares me. Every time I’m near her I feel nervous and it’s... difficult to keep control of myself», I brought a hand on my face feeling the cheeks burning. 224
«Miyuki-chan, this means that...» «Please, let’s not talk about it anymore», I cut it short. «As a friend, I had to tell you what I thought. It’s been a while since I wanted to talk about that» «What?!», I got worried. «Yes, since when you took her defense in front of Misato while Yamato was trying to sully her reputation», she nodded. «And then... this morning your reaction was clear» «Do you think that... she noticed it?» «I think even Nishie noticed that. In fact, she grabbed Asakawa and dragged her away instantly», she sighed. «Summer vacation will arrive soon, you’ll have the time to understand your feelings better», she tried to reassure me. «I’ve already taken my decision», I persisted to reiterate. «In that case...», she took me by the arm. «Let’s go home now» I was convinced that the conversation with Yukino at the end of the day got me knock down, but I was wrong: there was a text of Rei waiting for me on my phone. «Hi, Miyuki, my father gave me a cell phone. I had your number in my diary and I thought to send you a text. How are you? I saw you were strange this morning, is everything alright?» Attached to the message, there was a picture of me and Rei when we were kid while we were eating cookies. «I’m just a fool», I felt my cheeks wet. «I’ve become a crybaby» Just a moment later my phone rang: it was Misato. «Hi, am I bothering you?» «No, not at all. What’s with all this noise?» «Oh, well... the girls decided to come to the karaoke», she sighed. «Are you arrived home?» «Yes, I’m coming in right this moment» «Is everything ok?», she asked. «Your voice sound weird» «I’ve already told you. I’m just tired. I’ll feel better tomorrow», I lied. «Have fun» 225
«I can’t without you», she snorted. «But I’ll try», she laughed. «Good, you deserve it. So... see you tomorrow», I said goodbye to her again. *** I prepared the bath and plunged in the tub full of scented water. It was what I needed after a long day like that: “What should I say to Rei?”, I mulled over. “Maybe I can pretend that I didn’t receive the message”, I dove in the water catching my breath. That night there would be many girls ready to hit on Misato, why didn’t I worry about that? Why did I react like that when I saw Rei happy in company with another girl, that morning? “Even Yukino noticed that, that means I’m really losing it”, I clenched my knees on my chest. “What should I do more than this? Should I change class?”, I surfaced . «Enough!», I got angry at myself, then I heard my mother calling me, while appearing from the sliding door. «Honey, is everything fine? Are you talking to yourself?» «Yes, I am», I stuck my tongue out. «Ok, little crazy daughter», she came in giggling. «I have a good news for you» «Really? Tell me, I really need one today» «How come? Is there something wrong?», she asked handing me the bathrobe. «It was a rough day», I sighed. «Right, there was the school festival today. I’m sorry I couldn’t make it» «It’s okay, I know you were busy at work», I smiled. «So, what about the good news?» «Do you remember we planned to go to the hot springs for some day during your summer vacation?» «Yes, you said that we could go to the mountain in a nice place that a customer recommended to you», I felt a little better. «Are we going to go there? Seriously?» «I’ve already booked!» 226
«Oh, Mum, that’s great!», I jumped with my arms around her neck. «Are we leaving soon?» «We booked the rooms starting from the second day of your vacations» «Great! Wait... you two? Who’s gonna stay in the shop if dad is coming too?» «Actually, I wasn’t referring to your father...», she explained. «We’ll be only women», she giggled again. «And we’ll have separate rooms. So you girls can gossip until late. Aren’t you happy?», she winked. «S-Separate rooms? Who... are you referring to?», I felt cold sweat all over my body. «To Rei-chan, sweaty! We’re going with her and Ritsuko», she confirmed my suspicion. «Uh... what a wonderful news...», I weakly smiled in my mother’s arms, who was euphoric and started humming. “What now?”, I asked to myself trying to process also the last devastating news of the day.
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Orange Cream di Scarlett Bell
with drawings by Aeryn Sun
English translation by Sakura21 from micettescans.blogfree.net Quality check by Kitsune
TO BE CONTINUED...
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