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DISCLAIMER The jokes collecTed in This e -book are conTribuTed by people all around The world. we are claiming no copyrighT on mosT of The individual jokes found in This e -book . mosT of Them are, To To The The besT of our knowledge, in in The The public domain. i T is possible ThaT some of The jokes wiThin The collecTion are acTually copyrighTed. if There is any unfair misuse of copyrighT in This e -book , iT was noT willful. conTacT supporT@ TinTumon.com and we will remove iT. This collecTion is copyrighT © 2009 by TinTumon.com. all righTs reserved. we are noT claiming This for The jokes on This book . we are claiming an “ediTor ’s” or “collecTion” copyrighT .
1 Ambalam Tintumon: I love love u… girl: kaalil cherippu undu.. Tintu: “Ente hridhayam hridhayam AMBALAM alla… kayari ponnolu……!! Tintumon aaaaaaara aaaaaaara mon !!
2 Kalyanam Mintumol: “I love u” Tintumon: “I love u too too”” Mintumol: “Namukku kalyanam kazhikkam” Tintumon: “Paksh “Pakshe e aru nammale nammale kalyanam kazhikkum???”
3 Wrong answer Teacher: “I you add 3452 and 3096, then divide Teacher: divide the answer by 4 and multiply by 6, what would you get?” Tintumon: “Wrong answer”
4 Why boys chase girls ? Tintumol: Ningal boys enthina girls-ne chase cheyyunnathu. Ningalkkavare Marry cheyyan plan illenkilum. Tintumon: Pattikal car-inu pirake odunnathu car odikkanano ?
5 Pathra vayna Pathrathile vartha Tintu mon ingane vayichu: ”Ayyayo K V sebastian Pottitherichu” Achan: Manda !! nokki vayikku “110 KV substation Pottitherichu enna”
6 No reeze liquid Teacher: ‘Freeze aakatha oru liquid-nte peru parayoo’ Tintumon: ‘Chooduvellam’
7 Punishment Tintumon:”Cheyyaatha kaaryathinu enne shikshikkumo teacher?” Teacher:”Orikkalumilla.” Tintumon:”Nalla teacher, njan homework cheythittillaa!!”
8 Track suit Tintumon was chasing a donkey. But he couldnt catch that. Ater sometime he saw one zebra on the way. Tintumon caught the zebra and told: “panni track suit ittal njan nine pidikilla ennu karuthiyo?”
9 Best husband Three Malayali Couples in a Restaurant…. Couple 1 : Husband: “aa sugar ingeduthe Panjare….” Couple 2 : Husband: “aa liver ingeduthe Karale………” Upon hearing the above conversation, the third couple started……. Couple 3: dundu mol : kandille manushya, avarudeyokke sneham. Angane venam bharthakkanmar aayal! Then, Couple 3: Tintumon : aa bee ingeduthe Pothe..!!! :) ))
10 Maths Proo Exam Qn: IF 2(l+b)=P; Prove that 4b=P. Tintumon : 2(l+b)=P 2(ell+b)=P 2(bone+b)=P taking ‘b’ comon 2b(one+1)=P 2b(2)=P 4b=P! Tintumonoda kali
11 Interview malayalam pareeksha ezhuthikondirikkunna tintumon qn: prashastha kavayathri Sugathakumariyumaayulla oru abhimukham ezhuthuka tintumon inganne ezhuthi….. Njan: namasth teacher. njan teacherumaayi oru abhimukham nadathaan vanathaanu Sugathakumari: samayamila mone..poyittu pinne varu. Njan: shari teacher kali tintumonnodo???
12 Tharavattil Pirannavan tintumon :amme njan enganeya undayathu? amma:mone nee vellapokkathil ozhukivannatha tintumon:appol ammayum achanum appooppanum enganeya undayathu? amma:njangalum vellapokkathil ozhukivannatha tintumon:appol evide tharavattil piranna otta orennam ellalle
13 Cheetha koottukar Oru divasam achan tintumonodu: “da nee innale kudichu bodham illathe aanu vannathu..enthadaa ithu”.. tintu: ”ellaam cheetha koottukettukal kaaranama achaa..!! aake 5 beer, 5 koottukaar.., athil 4 perum kudikkilla ennu vechaal pinne njan enthu cheyyanaa..!!!. :) “
14 Pootum Thakolum Tintu mon in super market tintu:Chetta kalikkudukka undo? sales man:illa tintu:ice cream undo? sales man:illa tintu:chocolate undo? sales man:illa tintu:pootum thakolum undo? sales man:undu tintu:enna shop pootti veettil poykkude
15 Tajmahal Teachr: “Bharya’yude ormakayi shajahan ‘TAJ MAHAL’ panithu” . . . Tintum0an: Alla, njan onnu chothichotte , iyaal ithra valiya maravikaaran aayirunno ?
16 Complan Kaattiloode nadannu pokunna Tintumon marathil thoongi kidakkunna paampine kandappol paranjathu enthu?? . . . . . “Veruthe thoongi kidakkaathe mummy odu para complan vaangitharaan!” ;)
17 Convert Teacher: convert the ollowing sentence to malayalam. ” I SAW A FILM YESTERDAY” Tintumon: Teacher innale ‘A’ padam kandu.
18 Passive Voice teacher: Write the passive voice o ” I made a mistake” tintumon: ” I was made by a mistake”
19 Poor models FTV kanukayayirunna achante adukal vanna tintumon FTV noki achanod ” acha avarentha cheriya dress darichirikunnath..?” Achan: ” avar pavangalayath kondanu.. tintumon: ” ivarekalum pavangal vannal ennod parayanam acha please “
20 History class Tintumon history classinu munpu prarthikunnathu kanda teacher teacher: ithu nalla oru sheelamanu. nee entha prarthiche? tintumon: ente amma paranjittundu urangunnathinu munpu prarthinkanam ennu.
21 Smart answer Teacher asks !!! children what do u wish to in uture? Vinod–I want to be doctor, Deepa–I want to be a good mother. Tintumon– want to help deepa.
22 aaril anju MATHS TEACHER: ”Aaril anju poyal enth kittum?” TINTUMON: “Anjuvinte dead body kittum, karanam avalku swimming ariyilla…!!
23 Tintumonte guest Veettil virunnu vanna penkutti kulikkunnath olinju nokkukayayirunna Tintumonod Amma: Enthada ee kanikkunnath Tintumon: Chee.. mindalle. Aval nammude soap edukkunnundonnu nokkuvaa.. Tintumonoda kali..
24 Fee Kaalu potti Hospitalil stich idan chenna tintu.Fees Ethrayakum? Doctr: 1500 rs Tintu:veruthe 2 stich itta mathi,embroidary work onnum venda.
25 Interview Actress: Tamililekkulla ente praveshanam pettennayirunnu. Tintumon: Athayirikkum vendathra thuni edukkan pattathirunnath alle..!!!
26 I love you UKG’il padikkunna tintumonodu, LKG’il padikkunna pappymol:”I LOVE YOU DA” Tintu mon: “Pha dash mole, Mottennu viriyatha ninne kittiyittu njan enthu cheyyana…”?
27 Eduthal pongathathu Cigarette valichukondu pokunna Tintumone kanda palliyilachan: “Eduthaal pongaathathaanalloda ninte chundathu?” Tintumon: “Eduthaal pongaathathukonda acho.. valichukondu pokunne!!”
28 Tintumon & Kallan Tintumonte veettil kallan keri. Ithu kanda Tintumon: “Ente bagum bookum koodi kondu poda, illenkil njan ellavareyum vilichunarthum”
29 Rome Teacher: ‘When was Rome built?’ Tintumon: ‘At night, sir.’ Teacher: ‘Who told you that?’ Tintumon: ‘You did, sir. You once said that Rome was not built in a day.’
30 Rocket Breaking news Chandranil vellam matramalla thimingalam,kadalaama,sravu thudangiya jeevikalum ullatay kanunnu-NASA Tintumon: Pavam..NASAKu ariyillallo ROCKET Arabikadalil veena karyam
31 Bio practical exam Tintumon attended bio practical exam. . Examiner: Tell the bird name by seeing leg. . Tintumon: I dont know. . Examiner: u ail. . Whats ur name ? . Tintumon: See my leg & tell.
32 Exam barcode Tintumon examil onnum kittathayappol peparil |||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||| Ithu pole barcode varachittu adiyil ezhuthi “Scratch gently to read the answer “
33 Girlriend Duttumon: “My girlriend is an angel” Tintumon: “You are lucky aliya. Ente girlriend ippozhum jeevanode undu”
34 Achanum thengum Thengil ninu veena achanumayi hospitalil ethiya tintumonodu Dr: oru 5 min. mumpu ethichirunengil rekshapeduthamayirunu. Tintumon: thengenu onnu veenu kittende doctor.
35 fbre content Tuttumol: Arinjo? oru nalla diet-lu dharalam fbre undakanam. Tintumon: Athinentha thega thinnal pore . Tuttumol: Thegayil high fbre content aano? Tintumon: Pothikathe kazhichal mathi.
36 thermodynamic law o romance Tintumons thermodynamic law o romance: “Luv can neither be created nor be destroyed. It can only be changed rom one girlriend to another with considerable loss o money”
37 Geography Teacher: “Tintumone.. ithavanayum ninakku geographykku motta poojyam aanu. Ne entha geography padickathe ?” Tintumon: “Achan parayarundu. Lokam anudhinam marikondirikkukayanennu. Lokam onnu settle aayikkotte. Ennittu padickam !”
38 GIRL FRIEND TINTU MON:eda enik avale marakkan pattunnilla FRIEND:athrayku ishtamanenkil ninte veetil para TINTU MON: Parayaam…….. U.K.G. result varatte
39 Railway Train nirthiyapol yathrakaran tintuvinod: ithetha station…?? Tintumon windowilude purathek thalayitt nokiyitt: Railway station aanenn thonunnu…!
40 Mark Mash: adutha pareekshakku nee 75% mark vanganam. Tintumon: njan 100% mark vangum. Mash: thamaasha parayallee… Tintumon: Nayinte mone, aara aadhyam thamaasha paranjathu?
41 Appopan Tintumon: Apoppan endha urangukayano? Amma: Alla mone apoppan marichu. Nammal kozhiye okke kollumbol athu chaville?.. athu pole.. Tintumon: Appam Eppazha kari vekkunne!!
42 Dineshan Teacher :What is the name o Gandhiji’s son? Tintumon: Dineshan Teacher :Why????? Tintumon : Mahatma Gandhi is the ather o di-neshan
43 Progress report Tintumonte Achan: Ninte progress report evideyada ? Tintumon: Athu njan Ramuvinu koduthu. Achan: Athenthinada ? Tintumon: Avanu avante achane pedippickana…
44 Correction in Sentence
Tintumon: Can I go to the toilet? English Teacher: Tintumon, MAY I go to the toilet? Tintumon: But I asked frst!
45 Proposal Innocent Proposal rom tintumon(UKG-B) to Minimol(2-A) Tintumon: i luv u… Minimol: chi..poda,i’m elder than u Tintumon: i’m madly luving u… Minimol: poda… Tintumon: chechi chechi pls…
46 Census Panchayathil ninnum kanakku edukkan vanna udhyogasthan Tintumonte veetil ethi. Udhyogasthan: Mone ee veetil Kakoos undo? Tintu: Undallo.. Udhyogasthan: Sheri, Kinar undo ? Tintu : Manassilayi!!..uncle vegam chennirunnolu..avide pipe-um bucketum undu.
47 Tintumon and His ather Tintumon thante puthiya toy bus’umayi : “drrrr…pee pee pom.. Stop! Ella thendikalum irangiko. Eni kayaraanulla kazhuverikal kayaru. Puvam rite..drrr.. Kayari nilkada pulle. drrr..” Ithu shradicha tintumonte achan sahikettapol bus edthu maati. 5 mintolam tintumon karanjapol achan bus thirichu kodthu.. Tintumon: “drrr pee pee pom pom..drrr.. Stop..! Vegam irangada pattikale, allengil thanne oru naayintemon karanam 5 minute late aayi..!! Puvam rite. tin tin……!!
48 Chenda Tintumon:”Acha, enikkoru chenda vaangi tharumo?” Achan:”Venda, nee mattullavare upadravikkum.” Tintumon:”Illa acha,njan ellaavarum urangikkazhinje chenda edukku..”
49 Muthassi Tintu: muthashi marichu leave venam Teachar: ninte muthashi yalle 1 masam munp marichath Tintu: muthachan veendum ketti !!
50 With policeman Tintu monum ,3 riendsum koodi cyclil Schoolil powukayaaayirunnu… Oru Police’kaaran Kaikaatti…. Tintu : “phah….pullee.. Ippol Thanne 3 Per Aayi…
