TINDER FOR EXPERTS Version 1.0
Copyright 2014 Tinder Advisor Inc. All Rights Reserved
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by the the author Notes by Thank you for purchasing “Tinder for Experts” and and setting out to discover the immense potential of modern dating innovations. This book is targeted towards towards men who strive to become experts experts in all activities they deem worthy of their time. The advice will save you countless hours of trial and error, error, heaps of money from unsuccessful dates and the frustration that comes along the learning learning curve. This is the instruction manual to quickly join the top 1% of Tinder users and take full advantage of this amazing new way to meet women.
PersoNal accouNt Even before the emergence of Tinder, Tinder, I was successful with women women for the better part of a decade. It all started at a young age, when I decided to read about seduction psychology and nally began to understand what women truly look for in a man. I cannot call myself a “Pick-up Artist” since I have never practiced seduction seduction professionally, but I have read dozen of books from the masters masters in the eld. I credit them for most of the talent I have developed and for the many adventures I have enjoyed with beautiful intelligent women. For a living, I am serial entrepreneur entrepreneur working working alternatingly between Europe Europe and Canada. After selling my last venture, I embarked on a world world tour that lasted a full year. At the same time, I separated from from my girlfriend and proceeded to polishing my seduction seduction skills and getting back into meeting women. A new app called Tinder was quickly recommended to me. Astonishingly, I had a lot of trouble meeting the women I wanted on Tinder. My approach was simply not adapted for this form of interaction. I grew determined to upgrade upgrade my seductive skills and convince convince my ideal matches to go on a date with me. me. By the end of my travel travel year, I nally had it down down to a science. In fact, I was meeting more quality women than at any other point in my life. My success with the app amazed my friends and they began began to ask me for lines and advice. This made me see rst hand how small changes could dramatically improve their experience on Tinder, no matter how good looking or charming they happen to be. These friends slowly convinced me that there was real value in laying out my entire process in writing. I see Tinder - and dating in general - as a sales process. Most guys fail to get the women they deserve because because they do not know how to convey convey the best of themselves. themselves. This book will make you anexpert an expert in self-promotion. self-promotion . Your challenge will then be to live up to the expectations of all the new women eager to meet you!
ackNowleDgemeNts Perfecting techniques for Tinder was a long and arduous procedure, but it was greatly enhanced by the Stinson and The Marv. Marv. The three of us shared a rare advantage: we had contributions of two close friends: Dr. Stinson and an entire year lled with the free time to test Tinder in many dierent countries. countries. This enabled us to develop innovative techniques and become experts in our own right. Their ideas helped bridge the gaps in my understanding and were crucial in motivating me to write a complete comprehensive method. Tinder has enabled us to live unforgettable experiences, experiences, and now we believe it is your turn!
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reprogram your mind
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techNological DisruPtioN Welcome to the age of Apps! Apps! Seemingly every aspect of life is being made made easier by the smart device in your pocket. You now have the power power to be be connected to absolutely anyone at any time. The implications of of this second Internet revolution are far reaching. The traditional “options” to life’s everyday problems used to be conned in space and limited by the scarcity of information. You need a gas station, ask around for the nearest one. Fast-forward to today and you can nd the one that minimizes the detour and grants you the appropriate reward program. For those of you who have spotted where I am getting at, congrats! I am addressing the Tinder skeptics. Next time you are hoping to get lucky at a bar with only 10 or even 50 decent girls (some of which might not even be single), stop to realize that Tinder connects you to hundreds if not thousands of girls nearby! Tinder has arguably brought brought online-dating to the masses. Girls who would never dare to advertise themselves themselves on match.com nd far less social stigma in uploading a few Facebook pictures and swiping through the endless ocean of contenders. This breakthrough brings unique implications for men and women women respectively. The female behavior on Tinder varies greatly from from traditional online dating. This being said, the “online-daters” online-daters” will sometimes try their luck on Tinder. These women will will be among the easiest to meet and sleep with. They are comfortable going on dates with men they have never previously seen in person and they will display the common eagerness (sometimes desperation) desperation) that characterizes this bold segment. Yet some “online-daters” will balk at Tinder’s superciality and its lack of prole customization. customization. In summary, if you enjoy Tinder, I highly recommend you give traditional online sites a try: you will have more sex, but the “normal girl” is harder to come by. This brings me to the majority of girls on Tinder: the “normal “normal girls”. girls”. These will download the app for for fun, personal gratication and because it has become become an extremely popular pastime. pastime. These girls are single and you can sleep sleep with them, but there exist some some very palpable challenges challenges to this entirely new sphere sphere of dating. This book will break down these obstacles and give you a broad set of tools to overcome them. And nally, what does this technological revolution mean for us, the single men? The Economist cited Tinder as the modern-day cure for desperation; desperation; turning men away from prostitution and other such such sins. So let us take a look at Supply and Demand. Supply has suddenly surged thanks to Tinder implying implying less eort (ie. price of pursuit) for more of the women you would would usually get. Odds are that this abundance will be more more than you can handle and you will up your price (standards), ending up with hotter women and, yes, fewer prostitutes. So no matter your seductive skill level and no matter how handsome you are: you are missing out on a huge amount of potential if potential if you do not get comfortable using Tinder. The following chapters will show you how to save time along the learning curve and avoid feeling creepy when interacting with new women.
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tiNDer’s PercePtioN: the sex aPP Many describe Tinder as an app serving strictly to have a one-night stand or to nd a partner for a casual nostrings-attached relationship. This reputation is mostly unfounded unfounded and overall misleading, here is why. why. I’m sorry to say, but the girls on Tinder are no hornier than the girls at the bar. bar. Depending, which bar you go to, the converse may be true. However, you have a higher chance of getting laid because because you have a far greater selection, this is the law of large numbers. numbers . The more you try, the higher the probability probability that you will get what you expect. expect. So a lot of guys are already getting laid more thanks to Tinder, Tinder, does that mean the girls are easier? Initially, the girls who you nally convince to meet you will have a stronger adventurous side than the average (see Rick Premium later in this section). So yes, you will nd easy ones, but they are the outliers and you would still have had an easier time seducing them in the bar. Often, they fall below your standards, but hey, you charmed her from the comfort comfort of your couch. Hopefully, no one will see you you two together! Understand that sleeping with the normal girls - the t he ones you truly want - is i s going to beharder be harder than than if you’d had the luck of running into her alone at the bar. Think about it, you need to convince a girl who has never seen you that she needs to spend some time with you, preferably one-on-one, as opposed to go on with life as usual or meet one of the other million guys on the app. The good news is that the law of large numbers numbers ensures that you will succeed far more than at the bar, and there are techniques to multiply your odds. Once you succeed in meeting a girl from Tinder, casual sex is actually more likely than regular dates. This is because the girl is usually well removed from your social circle and will not have to answer for the crazy things she decides to do with you. Also, since this is the rst time you meet, she is not expecting expecting anything, leaving room for the magic of spontaneity that is so crucial in guaranteeing sex on the rst night. (see Coup de Grace Chapter)
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your oNliNe PersoNa: the sweetheart PriNciPle Sweetheart Now that we understand the playing playing eld, let us get into the specics specics of the tactics involved. The TheSweetheart Principle is the approach that will maximize your chances with the largest number of girls. It underlies most Principle recommendations in this book and actually goes against goes against many many principles put forth in traditional pickup literature.
traDitioNal a ttractioN Phase Let us look at a traditional pickup in a bar. If you have read books likeThe like The Game or Game or Mystery Method , you already understand the underlying dynamics. If you are a natural or utterly clueless, the scenario I am about to describe should still make sense and will later serve to contrast what goes on in the Tindersphere. Here is the scene: I am standing at the bar with a friend; we are talking about something extremely interesting. Suddenly, his head motion serves to tell me that a very attractive girl has arrived to order. I turn my upper body to address the girl and her friend “Excuse me girls, just quickly, can you help my friend and I settle a debate... who lies more, girls or guys?” The hot girl gives me a blank look; she has clearly been hit on dozens of times that night. Yet her friend chimes in with an answer. I retort: “Interesting you would say that! You must be the clever one!” Turn to the hot one. “And you must be the one with attitude” and then give her a cheeky cheeky smile. She proceeds to say that men lie more. Since she gives me nothing more to go on, on, I begin to banter with her friend about how the hot girl must have had a traumatic experience with a Frenchman who oered to take her to live in Paris, but then turned out to be Swiss and own a farm instead. When the hot girl says half laughing that this is not true, I turn to her and give her a hug and utter: “Sure it isn’t, but don’t worry, not all men are Swiss.” What has happened here?
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Game connoisseurs will spot spot this as the attraction phase of a pickup. I created attraction by taking the hot girl o her high horse. For the rest of the night, I would dierentiate myself from the other needy men by staying slightly cocky, thereby keeping her her on her toes and demonstrating that I am also a prize to be be won. I would also radiate condence so that the woman’s subconscious can begin to picture me as being good in bed.
tiNDer is Not yet real life This dynamic on Tinder is completely dierent. dierent. To begin with, successful implementation of the above example comes down more to the body language and tone of delivery than the actual words. On Tinder, you are stuck using messages with a girl that has absolutely minimal insight into your character. Next, you are not competing competing with needy guys buying drinks drinks or repeatedly trying to approach her. You are competing with apparent douchebags, douchebags, creeps and the sexually depraved. Furthermore, guys who are generally shy around women grant themselves every right to exude condence over Tinder, thus quickly falling into one of the aforementioned categories. The messages I have read on girls’ phones are simply simply unbelievable and prove that the overwhelming number of male matches clearly have no shame! The danger with conventional gaming tactics is that during the initial stages, you risk being grouped with the other weirdoes if you try to be cocky or condent. Besides, a girl with so many options at the swipe of a nger will not give you the benet of the doubt and you’ll be left wondering why she suddenly went cold.
DiffereNtiate yourself by beiNg the absolute biggest sweetheart I am talking about Ryan Gosling in The Notebook . The guy who can do no wrong wrong and was brought brought up to do anything for a woman. Someone who respects respects them so much that he is shy by nature and would never dare to approach a girl in a bar or do anything player-like for that matter. This is the guy that all women dream about, but would never actually be attracted to in reality. The Sweetheart Principle will enable you you to pleasantly surprise surprise a woman. Thanks to Tinder, she has found found the perfect sweetheart that she otherwise would would never have noticed! Also, this guy is so non-threatening that she could picture herself being completely comfortable meeting up with him, even after telling herself she was only using Tinder for fun and not to actually go on dates. When she does meet you, she she will not worry about you you expecting only sex, since you have shown interest in other aspect of her life. This is a powerful narrative. Although not the only one, the Sweetheart approach approach will yield the highest success because it appeals to a broad base of normal girls. In the later chapter, you will see many examples of how to put this frame into practice at every step until the meet-up. Don’t forget, once you nally do meet her, Ryan Gosling needs to turn into James Bond if you want to avoid a wedding and, instead, guide her seamlessly into your bed. (See chapter on “Tactics for in-person in- person Tinder dates) Remember: There is no foolproof formula formula to bed any girl on Tinder. There is only an attitude and some applied principles that will maximize the output for the time you invest. Focus on adapting your mentality and you will see drastic improvements.
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OTHER NARRATIVES: When you care about maximizing your chances of success, revert to the Sweetheart Principle. If Principle. If applied, it will never turn a girl o. However, if you wish to save time or target specic outliers, you can apply a dierent frame. Here are some examples of frame variations: The Sexual Escaltor: You Escaltor: You have matched with a girl that is not worth much investment or you have a very limited time horizon in this specic city - you want to cut straight to the chase. Although Sexual Escalation will alienate the majority, you can end up ltering down to the ones you aqre looking for. There are ways to quickily identify which girls are open to cater to your immediate needs and to get them to agree enthusiastically to a one-night stand. My good friend Dr. Stinson is truly a pioneer in this eld. (read about Sexual escalation Techniques in the “Facebook” chapter) The Social Facilitator: Here Facilitator: Here you play the cool guy that enjoys bringing people together and is not necessarily looking for a date. You should absolutely implement this frame if one of these three points applies: 1. You have close friends in common with the girl 2. She is part of that community that youhave strong strong ties with (Jewish, Hispanic, Fashion, Charity...) 3. She is visiting your city and does not know anyone (except perhaps the friends she is traveling with) Begin by pointing out that, through you, she can meet interesting people and have a great time. This is a sure shot way to build comfort. If she is showing a specic interest in you, gradually push for a one-on-one meet-up (see “Temperture Theory” in in “The “ The Art of Chatting”). Chatting”). You can always fall back on social group invitation if she does not want to meet alone. The Social Facilitator is also a last resort for other girls that have gone cold. If the date looks almost impossible, invite them to cool events - the law of large l arge numbers will insure that somewill end upmeeting you after all. The Tourist: This frame can be used in conjunction with the Sweetheart Principle. For various reason, local girls will go out of their way to meet you if you are a tourist, especially if you come from a place they could picture themselves visiting someday. If you act sweet and non-threatening, the girls will be happy to show you parts of town that regular tourists would never see. I have travelled much of the world using Tinder profusely, and this has led to some absolutely unforgetable esperiences! Keep in mind that sex will be more dicult since the girl will set up the date and your logistics may not be optimized in a foreign land. (see chapter on “Setting up a great date”)
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two core challeNges: risk P Premium & your PerceiveD value If you are a seasoned Tinder user, you might be beginning to wonder why the average quality of women you get is below your expectations. The hottest girls in your résumé were probably met through friends, in the workplace, or in another form of community. So why are Tinder girls not measuring up to this level of quality? At work, a woman faces very little risk interacting with you because you carry “Social Proof”, a common context that proves that you are not dangerous in any way. Furthermore, if you are successful successful in this context, you will easily be able to spark attraction.
oN tiNDer, you carry a risk P Premium Women will subconsciously discount your value because meeting a stranger requires an extraeort extra eort to overcome discomfort and discomfort and a risk of disaster (a date going terribly tends to happen more often than not - guys just don’t know what they are doing). doing). These two variables make up your Risk Risk Premium and the higher it is, the more dicult it will be to meet the girls you want. The starting Risk Premium is beyond your control: some girls are simply more trusting or more adventurous than others. Some are also busier or less keen to improve improve their love lives. The girls with innately higher risk premiums premiums will require more work to bring the discount down to a point where they are ready to meet. Temperature Theory, Theory , explained later, will help you gage how much more work you need to put in.
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oPtimize your PerceiveD value On Tinder, men have a lot of diculty displaying how great they really are. As a result, they see themselves as being far better than their proles allow women to understand. understand. Naturally, they can never score with women they deem worthy. Your Perceived Value is a continuous project and is the ultimate deciding factor for the quality of women you will meet. It will vary from one one to the other; for instance, some women women admire travel and some some do not. Yet there are ways to make your average Perceived Value go up to levels that would even exceed your own own expectations. This is the foundation for all the of the subsequent seduction seduction techniques implemented on Tinder. Tinder. The higher it is, the easier everything will follow.
theory iN Practice You are an amazing guy and you give yourself an arbitrary value of 300. 300. You deserve a girl with a combined value of 300 as well, right? Well, let’s say that your Perceived Value is not optimized and your prole only shows greatness adding up to 250 points (the (the ratio of 5/6 is actually much better than most men pull o ). You are talking to normal girls and you are having trouble making them feel completely comfortable meeting a stranger. They give you an average Risk Premium Premium discount of 20%. Therefore, on average you will be meeting women with a value of 200, thus only two thirds of the 300 you think you are worth! So is Tinder doomed to give you only shallow fun fun with low quality women? Not necessarily. You need to focus focus on the two challenges described described above: above: The Risk Premium and Premium and your Perceived Value. Techniques in this book will will focus on precisely that. You can create a prole that will make you you look even better than you see yourself, thereby giving you a value of say: 350. Proper conversational skills, social social validation and Sweetheart Principle can help you drastically reduce reduce the Risk Premium women feel. If you can bring it down to suppose 10%, then you are scoring women worth 315 and punching a bove your weight! Now that you understand the broad strokes that need to be improved, let us look at how to build an amazing prole and send your Perceived Value through the roof!
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create the irresistible prole
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who shoulD you be? You should aim to be the most interesting interesting man in the world. Even more interesting than the Dos Equis guy! guy! Think about how a magazine would frame frame you if it were doing a special report report on how great you are. Done properly, properly, your prole can spectacularly inate your Perceived Value and overcome the Risk Premium of girls you used to consider out of your league. It will take a while to get the right photos, but we will see the absolute dos and don’ts to set you on the right track! PERSONAL COACHING OUR EXPERTS ALSO OFFER PERSONALIZED CONSULTING TO MAXIMIZE YOUR ONLINE IMAGE ON TINDER, FACEBOOK AND INSTAGRAM. IF YOU ARE INTERESTED. VISIT: WWW.TINDERAD WWW.TINDERADVISOR.COM VISOR.COM
Do you NeeD to be haNDsome? Tinder is as supercial as it gets. Looks matter tremendously, tremendously, but hold on, this does not mean you need to be be handsome to harvest a ton of matches. It just means that you need to learn how to sell yourself properly. In this respect, women are light-years light-years ahead of men. I have lost count of the number of of times my jaw dropped when I discovered what a woman actually looked l ooked like versus her Tinder prole (make sure to check her Facebook to avoid awkward meet-ups, this is explained later). Although I don’t advocate hiding any aws, as women often do, you must learn how to cast them in the best possible light!
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methoDs for DealiNg with sPecific flaws You are out of shape: Do not post a photo of you shirtless lying on a couch surrounded surrounded by skinny people. This will amplify the attribute and raise more objections objections than necessary. Also, do not hide this by only posting posting face shots! This will eventually make the woman feel tricked once she gets a proper look at you. Instead, post photos of you, on your own, rocking some well-adjusted clothes doing something sporty or stylish. This way, the aw is immediately outweighed outweighed by other qualities in the same photo. photo. Also, if you are alone, you are not contrasted to people in better better shape. Do not post a photo of you with with friends in even worse shape. This will will sink your social value. You are short: The girl will have no way of holding this against you so long as you do not post photos with much taller people. The worse would be to post a photo of you with with a taller girl - this will immediately trigger a left swipe. I have a couple of very short friends, including Dr. Stinson, and this has not hindered their incredible success on Tinder. Occasionally, you will meet a taller girl, but but this can be dealt with reasonably well in person. person. You are bald: If you are seriously balding, shave your head and rock that style. If you are starting to bald and it is noticeable, do not hide it by wearing a hat in every photo! Angle the photos so that it is not too noticeable. Also, post a few that date back to a time when you sported a full set of hair. At 35 years old, my good friend The Marv is an expert in this art. You have bad skin: This is very easy to smooth over over using modern photo photo optimizing tools like Instagram Instagram (more on this to follow). Again, the trick to avoid a “betrayal” reaction from from the woman is not to hide your aw, but to minimize it and cast it in the best light. Sporting a nice tan in your photos can can make you look a full point more appealing. You have below average looks: Use Instagram to take cool photos. Show that you have a really really interesting life and access to luxury. Do not show photos with handsomer guy friends. friends. However, photos photos with attractive female friends (showing interest in you) are proven to make you look 1 to 2 points more attractive (more on this in the Secondary Pictures section). section). Remember: Optimize your aws. aws. Do not hide them completely. completely. Imagine you decide to meet a girl you perceived perceived as curvy. In reality, she turns out to be curvier curvier than you thought. You will be slightly disappointed, but but odds are that you will still enjoy yourself. This is even truer for women women because they are not as supercial as men. Once they know you, they will even learn to like you for your aws. However, imagine you thought a girl was in good shape and she turns out to be that same very curvy girl. You will feel completely fooled and you will never forgive her for it.
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broaDeN your aPPeal Another important concept to keep in mind is aiming for a broad appeal. appeal . This means avoiding showing or saying saying polarizing.. For instance, if you are anything particularly polarizing are a smoker, do NOT post a photo photo of you smoking. smoking. This will turn o a large number of women who later could have tolerated the habit. In essence, to maximize your matches, stay away from factors that give women the slightest reason to say “no” or to categorize you as a “type”. Not a single woman will have a problem with a photo of you travelling to remote places, or doing a particular sport. sport. However, many will categorize categorize you if you reveal a photo of of you in a mosh pit with KISS makeup all over your body. body. The “Rocker Type” Type” simply does does not appeal to a broad base. Similarly, avoid photos of you at the church or the synagogue synagogue unless you want to alienate almost every every atheist girl. Having passions and strong community aliations will be a source of attraction when you nally do meet the girl, but on Tinder, they will make her judge you all too quickly. I strongly recommend leaving your career mysterious and open-ended. open-ended. This is not LinkedIn - you are are not here to talk about work! Besides, a picture of you in your oce oce - no matter how senior you look - will categorize you you as the “corporate type” and you will lose matches. In fact, all professions will categorize you: “doctor type”, “manual laborer”, “model/actor type”... Even if you are proud of your profession, resist disclosing it too early because it will limit your appeal. Instead, show the intriguing things it grants you access access to, like private events, fancy trips, meeting famous people... The girl will be curious and might even match you to nd nd out what it is you actually do*.
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avoiD the Douchebag traP Finally, you need to stay away from anything that could make you look like adouchebag a douchebag!! Almost every every guy will get this wrong and it will sink your perceived value. Let us look over some of the common mistakes: NO SELFIES: There, I said it and I’m going to say it again later on to make sure you remember. We all get turned on when girls take seles in their skimpy skimpy new dress, but but this is not a two way street. Only the lower quality girls will give you props for talking a shirtless sele after the gym. The vast majority will see you for what what you are: a douchebag. Seles at the beach, seles at the ski resort, resort, before a gala...no, gala... no, no and no ! you . The only sele that can be tolerated is If you are a cool guy, you have friends who can take a nice photo for you. using a GoPro and an extendible arm because no real life photographer could hit some of those angles. Otherwise, delete every sele you ever took! NO “COOL SERIOUS FACE”: I’m sorry, but unless you are starring in a professional modeling shoot, you have no reason to pretend to be serious. Even if you were caught at a serious moment, it has no place on your Tinder prole. The “Duck Face” is especially painful. When someone is taking a photo photo of you, you smile, smile, and it is as simple as that. NO POSING WITH SOMETHING YOU DO NOT OWN: You see a sports car or a nice boat and you quickly go take a photo with it. Congratulations, but you need to keep it for your own fantasizing. fantasizing. Dr. Stinson came came up with a clever twist to avoid douchebaggery: someone took a slick Instagram photo of him from the passenger seat of the Porsche he was driving. driving. You can only tell it is a Porsche Porsche because of of the logo on the steering steering wheel. Girls love this because he is not posing; he is simply having fun driving a Porsche! (Stinson does not own the car in question, but no girl ever assumed he did, nevertheless he is associated with an item of luxury) NO SHOWING-OFF: Cool people do not need to show o, they simply radiate all the things that make them cool. This dierence may take some time to grasp. Let us assume you own own the Porsche in the previous example. Driving it is cool because you only see the steering steering wheel and the road ahead. Also, Stinson is not even looking at the camera, implying that this is not a big deal. If the car was not moving and he was giving the thumbs up up to the photographer, girls will know for sure that he borrowed it from his friend. So which one is cooler? 1. You smiling in a bathrobe bathrobe with with an amazing suite suite behind you. 2. You freaking out in front front of a Hilton sign. If you guessed 1, then you are on the right track. As mentioned earlier, girls like to see that you indulge in luxury, but this must be shown in a subtle manner without looking like this is the rst time ti me you’ve ever splurged on a nice room. The same goes for your body body.. If you are in good shape do NOT NOT have a photo of you exing for the camera camera (especially not a Sele)! Instead, have a photo of you doing something that requires you to be shirtless like sailing or catching a Frisbee at the beach and make sure that the angle gives you a great denition! The same logic applies to style style.. Wear nice, well-tted well-tted clothes. Do not wear wear a black t-shirt with a huge “Armani” “Armani” logo written on your chest. Are you starting to get it? If ever you are not sure whether or not you are committing committing one of the cardinal sins mentioned above, ask a female friend with a good fashion sense to have a look at your Tinder prole. Ask her if you look douchy in any picture picture and tell her to be brutally honest.
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the Profile Picture important element of your prole. Your prole picture is the single most important element prole. Most women will will only see this when deciding which way to swipe. swipe. They will not read your status and not look look at your other photos until they have matched with you. Most will not even look at your age! age!
formattiNg the Perfect shot So how do we get maximum impact for just one photo? photo? Firstly, formatting formatting is very important. Avoid posting posting a photo with: 8 only your face 8 you standing somewhere in the distance 8 you turned away from the camera 8 you sporting the “serious” look 8 you posing with anyone else. People in the background can can be ok. 8 blurry resolution. Women are very weary of this while swiping and you should be too. 8 parts of the photo hidden by darkness. Same principle as previous point. Avoid black and white photos. 8 you wearing sunglasses
Instead: 9 Have a photo of ONLY you, the sole focus of all attention. 9 We must be able to see your entire head, down to at least your chest*. Anything past the knees will be too
zoomed out.
9 Stare at the camera, or slightly away if you want to have the “in action” look. 9 Smile genuinely 9 Make sure it is a crisp shot, such such that someone who saw the photo could could later recognize you in person. person. This
being said, use apps like Instagram to optimize the lighting and smooth over your features. features. This needs to be the absolute best version of you.
Indicators: taste for luxury, physical activity, artistic side, travel 9 Display one or several of the following Value Indicators: experience or acute sense of style.
*Note: If you have a nice body, I do not recommend being shirtless on the prole prole picture. In most cultures, this will come across as douchy. Also, many other guys guys will think that this is the way to go. Dierentiate yourself by having her discover your body on the later photos (more on this in the next section).
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iNtegrate oNe or several value iNDicators Taste for Luxury: Someone once told me: “A well well tted suite does to a woman what lingerie does to a man”. man”. If you have a designer suit or tuxedo that is either custom tailored or a perfect t, then you would be wise to have a woman see it. This has been my preferred preferred approach for a while. If you combine it with with a slick skinny tie then you are also ticking the style indicators. Other examples include: 9 being in a very nice restaurant with some wine or a fancy meal 9 being in a luxury hotel room or balcony 9 if you have a very nice apartment, you can pose for a picture there 9 a fun activity known to cost a lot, like l ike ying in a helicopter
Physical Activity: Absolutely no photos at the gym. Although I fully advocate a good workout workout regimen, do not make this the central premise of “who you are”. are”. The woman will automatically disqualify you as someone someone with no life. Instead, it needs to be something that looks fun like: 9 You at the top of a mountain in hiking clothes or light ski/snowboard gear gear 9 You in a marathon outt near the nish line 9 You dancing in a cool venue 9 You on the eld/court of your favorite sport holding the equipment
Artistic Side: Posing in front of a painting at the museum is simply simply not going to cut it. You need to display something more profound. profound. For example: 9 Hold a camera and be in front of a set or a breathtaking setting 9 Get featured on stage holding a microphone. 9 Hold artistic painting material, but NOT your actual painting. You don’t want the girl to swipe left or right right
depending on whether or or not she likes your art. Let her be curious.
9 Take a dancing lesson, like salsa, and get someone to take a photo of you looking like a pro, even if it is just
your rst time.
9 If you play an instrument, save it for the secondary picture or she might think this is a major part of your life,
as opposed to a hobby. hobby. See next section. Travel Experience: I strongly believe that travel is the best investment of time and money to grow as a person. A few trips to remote locations will make you so much much more interesting to any woman. You will automatically have higher value and you will have an easier easier time lling dates with interesting interesting conversation. Even if you have only travelled to the nearest national park, the picture will hold more value than somewhere local.
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Capture yourself with something unique about about the place you are visiting, be it a waterfall or the Eifel Tower. When appearing in the photo, it is better if you do not look like a complete tourist. Backpacker gear will not impress impress as much as some of the local fashion that you bought that day. Girls love seeing that you are versatile and that you adapt to every new culture you y ou encounter. Acute Sense of Style: In your photos, you need to be wearing wearing your most stylish clothes. Careful, being stylish does not mean looking like you put two hours of work into your appearance. Being extremely casual is part of style as long as the clothes look nice and are well adjusted to your body. If you have a very strong personal style, be careful not to fall into a specic type like Goth, rocker, hipster, gangster or overly preppy. preppy. This will trigger left swipes. If you see yourself as a trendsetter, trendsetter, you might want to tone it down for Tinder, since not all girls will appreciate this. If you feel you are lacking in the fashion area, buy buy men’s lifestyle magazines like GQ. Also, visit the website of of the world’s fashion leaders like Armani, Hugo Boss, Boss, Dolce & Gabbana and Diesel to name a few. Analyze the colors and looks that are dening this season. season. Then, I recommend going to a designer designer store and having the cute employee employee help dress you properly. properly. If you have stylish female friends, bring bring them along too. Designer clothes will simply look better than regular clothes to the trained eye. Girls are much more perceptive of these things than men, so don’t think you can fool them. As mentioned earlier, stay away from large logos seen seen on belt buckles or t-shirts, they will make you look douchy. The occasional medium range items from Zara or H&M are all right, so long as they follow the styles set by the leading brands.
PRIVATE PHOTO TRICK IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO USE A PHOTO THAT YOU NOT WISH TO APPEAR ON YOUR FACEBOOK - FOR EXAMPLE, YOU USED INSTAGRAM TO IMPROVE AN OLD SHOT - SIMPLY POST IT ON YOUR WALL UNDER THE “ONLY ME” VISIBILITY SETTING. AS OF THIS PUBLICATION, THE LATEST TINDER ALLOWS YOU TO USE THESE PICTURES P ICTURES ON YOUR PROFILE.
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your secoNDary Pictures While viewing secondary photos, the girl has now decided to dig deeper into your prole. prole. She will usually look at all of them, so you have more exibility than with girls who only look at your prole prole picture. Keep in mind that the last photo is the most important since this is the one she will ponder ponder on before making her decision. It should be almost as good as the prole picture.
show DiffereNt facets of your character Tinder enables you to add ve supporting photos. You must absolutely upload the maximum number of photos to have the highest chance of success. While photos good enough to be be a Prole Picture can also qualify as you . As long as these Secondary Pictures, the goal here is broader: you want to show many unique variations of you. are non-polarizing, they will help spark interest from many dierent segments of the female population. You will therefore want to target the Value Indicators Indicators that you did not integrate into your Prole Picture. For example, do not have six photos of you in a suite – if done right, one is enough. Use the other pictures to show that you also know how to be casual, that you travel a lot, that you are sporty... Refer to the previous section for ideas. ideas.
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aDDitioNal maNDatory aND oPtioNal shots In addition to these Value Indicators, there are tweaks that can apply to Secondary Pictures, but not in your Prole pictures. Here are the new categories: The Body Picture: Finally, it is time to show o your body! body! I believe this is a must, no matter what shape you are in. If you omit a body picture, the woman woman may suspect that you are insecure insecure or hiding something. 9 If you are in shape, do not look like you are exing. Also, do something that requires you to have your shirt
o. A shirtless pic with your feet dipped dipped in water will look a lot better than one of you in your bedroom. bedroom. Alternatively, you can be on a boat or doing a sport. Instagram will make sure your muscles look absolutely spectacular. 9 If you are in average to poor shape, you still still need to get shirtless! Dr. Stinson does this masterfully masterfully by lying on
his stomach, facing the camera, such that you can only see his face and shoulders. This way, he looks ripped even though he truly isn’t. If you are overweight, get shirtless, shirtless, but do not let your weight show! She already knows you have a few extra pounds from your other photos (but you have compensated with adequate designer clothes). You just need to show that you are not the guy at the pool that keeps his shirt on! Sunglasses: Let’s admit it, we all look cooler with our shades on. This is perfectly ne for your Secondary Pictures, but not your Prole Picture. Do not wear sunglasses on more than half your pictures or else girls may think you don’t look good without them. Make sure they are stylish and that you are still doing something else in your photo than just wearing glasses. Looking into the Distance: This is also ok for Secondary Pictures and can make for a cool eect if you are in a truly stunning setting. Also, you can be standing further in the background if this attracts more attention to the scene you are aiming to demonstrate. The Cooking Photo: Although optional, you can almost only go right with this type of photo. Have someone capture a shot of you stirring up something fancy, fancy, with many ingredients spread out neatly in the background. If you do not have a nice kitchen, take a one-o cooking class. class. Girls will want to know what you are making and will will assume you are a great cook even if you are are not. Some will even be willing to come straight straight to your house for you to cook them something! I am not a great cook, but I have never gotten a single complaint. complaint. This is because women will will appreciate the eort far more than the end result. The food just needs to be edible edible and require a reasonable degree degree of preparation. The presentation is just as important: light a candle, use nice cutlery, arrange the food artfully on the plate and open a good bottle of wine! Playing an Instrument: The great thing about this picture is that you don’t even need to know more than a few notes to capitalize on the value it brings. Sit at a piano and look concentrated while your friend captures the moment. Women will assume this is one of of your many talents and you will likely never have to prove prove it. Childhood photo: If you have a funny or extremely cute photo of you as a child, this can have a powerful powerful eect on many women. They will feel an intrinsic sense of aection for you and will will view you as non-threatening – tting nicely with the Sweetheart Principle. Place this photo in 4th or 5th because, on the rst pictures, she is still trying
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to gure out if she nds nds you hot and the 6th photo is too too pivotal. No baby photos please, this is going too far and will come o as weird since she has no way of knowing if it is you, your nephew or your kid! The Party Photo: Time to show that you like to go go out and have fun! This is an optional optional photo and must be treated with care. Firstly, remember that you are targeting a broad appeal, appeal, so avoid anything too vivid like a rave or a mosh pit. You must look like you are having fun, but but you cannot look tipsy. tipsy. In fact, don’t be holding a drink drink – even girls who drink themselves will be turned o by this. If you like to pop massive bottles, have them be in the background. Don’t hold one while you stand on a table table like a douche. So how to do this properly? properly? Make sure the party venue venue prestigious and non-trashy. Rooftop parties or galas have a particular appeal to women. They also love themed costume parties; so if you happen to be dressed dressed retro 60s for an event, take a good photo! A Halloween party can also work work although this is much less original. No matter how you dress that night, you need to look slick and the picture should be very crisp and clear. clear. Pulling a little dance move can look charming and show that you are not reserved. Include other People: I highly recommend showing that you have friends friends in one or two of your Secondary Pictures. Pictures. The goal here is to look extremely comfortable embracing embracing others in a social context. If you look awkward, the woman will imagine that the date will go badly. There are dierent set-ups to be mindful of ranging from great, great, tricky and mostly bad: 8 A crowd: usually counterproductive, the girl will waste time trying to nd you in the group and get annoyed.
This will only work if you are clearly at the forefront of the gang. 8 You and children: This is a no. Women will think that you either have kids or that they are an immediate immediate
preoccupation for for you. This will drastically lessen your your appeal. The only way this can work work is if you are caring for poor children that are clearly not yours. This will show that you have a sense of social responsibility responsibility and that, one day, you will be a strong father father gure. This is actually very powerful. 8 You and a group of girls: Sorry, I do not endorse endorse this approach. Whether the women are working working for you
or you happen to have many hot friends, having them all pose with your will come o as douchy. Girls are usually not drawn to the “pimp” appeal. appeal. If you convinced a bunch of playboy playboy bunnies to give you one lucky photo, girls will think you are a loser. 9 You and a few friends: I would also not recommend this. It is hard to make this work work in your favor. favor. The guys
cannot steal your thunder, but also cannot drag down your social social value. If you have really cool friends and appear to be the leader in this particular photo, then it will work well. 9 You and a pet: Be careful with this one. one. If you live in an area where where absolutely everyone loves dogs, this can
work so long as it is the cutest mutt anyone has ever seen. seen. However, especially especially in urban settings, you will have your fair share of women who do do not like pets. When they see you with one, they will assume it is yours and that you come as a packaged packaged deal. This will trigger objections. objections. If you own a pet, pet, don’t worry she will will eventually learn to love it, but since Tinder is extremely ckle, you are better o revealing this later. 9 You and one girl: This is dangerous. Since Tinder automatically builds you a prole prole using past Facebook Facebook
prole photos, many girls will assume that the woman in you pictures pictures is your ex-girlfriend. The fact that you have her on your Tinder account will make girls assume assume you still care for her. This is a complete deal-breaker for most women. A mind-boggling number number of men make this mistake. Therefore, to avoid confusion, confusion, never have another woman on your prole pictures. pictures. You can have one in your secondary pictures, but only if it is totally clear that she is just a friend or a random girl. girl. If you can aord it, two girls are are better.
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9 You and one friend: Can work well, just make sure that you are doing something that friends do together like
partying, playing a sport or travelling, not just standing in the street. 9 You with two girls: girls: Yes, but do not not get sandwiched between between the two like a wannabe pimp. pimp. Be doing
something cool like have one on your shoulders and the other pulling your arm. Needless to say that this will entirely backre if the girls are not attractive. The girls must appear to be giving you more more attention than you are giving them in return. A good way to implement this is to be the only one looking at the camera, while the girls look at you. This will boost your attractiveness to women because because you appear preselected by other women. If you are already a very attractive man, be careful careful not to look too much like a player. 9 You and a gay guy: This can be funny and actually work work as well as having an attractive female female friend posing
with you. If girls see you as preapproved preapproved by the gay community, community, they will respect you for it. Just make sure that you look absolutely straight, some girls may have a problem with you swinging both ways. 9 You and someone famous: If you can get a good photo with a celebrity than this is sure to boost your
Perceived Value considerably. Casual and exclusive exclusive settings are are better. For instance, a picture of you and Justin Timberlake in his concert venue is worth less than one with with you two sitting in a hotel lobby. Beware of celebrities known to polarize opinions such as prominent politicians. For better or worse, a picture with Obama will cost you a lot of matches. 9 You and your family: A picture of you with your parents parents or grandparents will let a girl know that you are a
family guy and she will associate positive emotions to this. Similarly to a childhood photo, this will make you come across as modest and non-threatening, thereby lowering lowering your Risk Premium. Make sure that you and your family appear to be happy in the photo! 9 You and wild animals: This is much better than a pet photo because you can show that you are an animal
person without girls assuming that you own the animal in question. question. The more exotic the animal the better! better! Travel around to get photographed photographed riding an elephant, high-ving a kangaroo, kangaroo, kissing a dolphin... These will also boost your Perceived Value. Make sure that the animals are alive in the photo – the female community is very divided over the issue of hunting. Clashing To Maximize Intrique Secondary serve to show your many sides. This displays your versatility, but will also spark a keen interest from many dierent types of women. The broader your spectrum of activity, the more attraction you will create. On top of attraction, you can also trigger fascination by showing activities that appear to contradict each other. I call this clashing clashing.. For example, in one photo you are giving a toast at a gala (luxury, (luxury, style, social value) value) and the next you are building a house in a Colombian ghetto (physical activity, travel, benevolence). Most “formal types” would never venture out of ve star hotels. You are eectively escaping categorization categorization and many women will want to know: “who “who is that man who can aord to be several dierent people in one! ” An advanced technique is to create an apparent clash within the same scene. scene. The examples will seem far-fetched, far-fetched, but if pulled o, women will almost always ask about these photos: 9 Wearing an expensive suite for a physical activity (running, climbing, jumping into i nto water...) 9 Being extremely casual at a formal event surrounded by suites 9 “Working” on your laptop at a deserted beach or another highly exotic and unlikely setting
Come up with your own ideas. Detach yourself from the ordinary and strive for the extraordinary
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comiNg uP with a DescriPtioN The important thing to remember remember about your description description on Tinder is that it matters very little. You have 500 characters to write a nice description description of yourself. yourself. Do not fall in this trap: more more does not mean better. better. You want to write exactly one full sentence and sentence and that’s it. You will look like you are trying much too hard if your description appears to have required any real thought. Tinder is meant to be a low-eort, low-eort, simple app. Your photos need need to do all the talking. They were presumably presumably not taken explicitly for Tinder and therefore will not look too try-hard. A long monologue will make you seem willing to pour your heart out to the million million strangers viewing your prole. prole. This is not high value at all. Crucially, you should use this space to add your Instagram Instagram account. Since Tinder only allows for six pictures, pictures, adding Instagram will allow women women to nd out more of your qualities. Creating a great Instagram is covered covered in the next section. section. Here is the format:
About White Panda
a simple sentence of my choosing. Instagram: xxx_xxx
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commoN errors 8 Remember the principles from the previous sections: nothing show-o, polarizing, work-related, weird, gross
or low value in any way.
8 Abstain from saying that you are a tourist or new to a city. This will cost you matches with women women seeking
something serious or with tourist tourist girls looking for a local. Therefore, mention this later when the temperature of the conversation is right.
8 Quotes are also perceived as quite lame. Not all women are seeking a man who thinks of himself as a modern-
day philosopher. Come up with something yourself, yourself, but nothing too deep. deep.
8 Do not cite what you are looking for for in a woman. This is also too try-hard. 8 Do not try to be funny. funny. Being cute is ok, but but saying something with a punch punch line is much too try-hard. try-hard.
Besides, girls have a dierent sense of humor and most will nd you lame.
8 Do not say anything already made obvious obvious in your photos. This is a waste of space. 8 Do not mention what you plan to do with a woman you meet. meet. This will make her think of the date too early
on.
8 Do not say anything too serious. It is better to appear to be joking around to set a relaxed tone and to avoid
her judging you.
8 Do not leave this area blank. You will come across as strange.
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seNteNce suggestioNs If you avoid the previous errors, you can say pretty much anything. This being said, you might as well say something that can set o women’s imagination and serve in the conversation later. Here are some examples of these:
romaNce themeD “Magic carpet certied” – obviously joking around, but she might ask you to come pick her up with it. “I love long carriage rides into the sunset” – notice that you are not saying you will necessarily do this with her. This could make her think of the date too early on. “Flying to the moon and back” “The fortuneteller brought me here” “Dancing in the moonlight... it just feels so right” “Looking for something dumb to do” – some girls might spot the Bruno Mars song and chat you up saying“ saying “ hey hey baby, I think I want to marry you” .
travel themeD “If you could wake up anywhere in the world tomorrow, where would it be?” “Sandy beaches and snowy mountain tops!” - usually girls will will like one of the two. two. “Buenos Aires – Paris - Berlin” – – if you have lived in several places or speak another language than just English, hint at it in your status. If a woman shares a particular anity, this will will pique her interest. You can use this as a second line in your description description because it is not really a sentence. This is the exception to the rule.
cute liNe evokiNg familiarity* “See you later, alligator” - Credits to Stinson for a using sweet sentence that close friends usually usually part with. She might even respond: “In a while, crocodile” . “Rise and shine, porcupine” “What you cooking, good looking?” “Take care, teddy bear!” *Note: Although these lines give the girl little content to help the conversation along, they make you look *Note: unassuming and approachable. This initiates the Sweetheart Sweetheart Principle before before the chatting even begins. I would recommend a cute line if your pictures spill into the “seducer “seducer”” or “exclusive” look. In conclusion, your description is not intended to give give you additional value. Your pictures must must entirely do this for you. The best you can achieve is to come o as relaxed relaxed and interesting. On the ip side, you can lose a lot of value if you write something too long or if you commit one of the common common errors. Give her a glimpse into your personality, but leave her wanting to know more!
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the age coNuNDrum Your age is written up there, in big letters, right next to your name. Contary to your description, this number will play a big role in a woman’s snap decision on your eligibility. If you are used to seducing only younger women, this will not pose a problem for you. However, if you interested in women your age or older, this will be a strong limiting factor to your success. To begin with, most women use the age lter and will not even see people their age or younger. Even if you do manage to match them, they will have a strong bias against meeting guys born even a few months before them. There are many reasons for this (pride, maturity, habit) and on Tinder you do not yet have enough rapport to diuse them. I don’t usually advocate obscuring information about yourself, but if you are mature for your age, the pros will outweigh the cons. At 24, you get girls 19-23. If you are suddenly 28, you can get girls 20-27. This means many more women and a higher level of maturity on your dates. Do not reveal your age when you meet the girl, even if she is younger. This will shatter your image. Between the age of 22 and 26 (before Tinder), I regularly inated my age. As long as I stuck with my story, I never got a single comment from the many older women I encountered. When I nally got into a relationship with a girl two and a half years my senior, I waited a few months to tell her my real age. She was upset for a day, but then admitted to being grateful. Had I not put on this act, she would never have spoken to me and overlooked what was to become a great romance! The decision is yours. Unlike hidden phyical characteristics, your age will not be revealed when you nally meet the girl. Facebook allows you to alter your age, but not too often. Proceed with care.
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