1. Be yourself. Be your best self. Be a man. Take responsibility. Take action. Trust yourself. You are enough. These are all one and the same thing. Where people get lost is in idea of transition or change, acting out of character or whatever. Forget all that. Being yourself means following your core purpose and purest intentions – free from socially conditioned influence. You will make mistakes when you do this, but that’s natural because interactions are subjective. Responsiveness is the answer to ‘interaction mistakes’. Being your best self means ‘you plus you taking responsibility in life’. Your physical nature as a man, and your nurture that is individually unique to only you that sets you apart. 2. Be natural. It’s better to be natural and do things that pick up would say are wrong, than to do the perfect pick up according to the ‘book. If the pickup is too perfect, if you seem too seamless as a person you won’t come off as normal and you the girl won’t take you seriously. When your being natural you make mistakes. This makes sense to the girl. In fact, you should make lots of mistakes, you prove your worth (DHV) when you deal with your own mistakes and other turbulence. 3. Don’t calculate and micromanage. One of the first things girls look for is evidence of the ‘cogs in your head grinding’ to see if you second guessing yourself and if yourself aware. If you are self aware, calculating your game, and trying to micromanage the interaction the girl will instantly put you in the ‘not alpha male’ category and you are done – even if you can string the set out a bit. If you’re not self aware, not calculating not micromanaging – that is to say if your present, in the moment and not self aware you communicate to the girls that ‘you are enough’ and they categorise you as an alpha male and attractive. This is what you want, its only when you second guess yourself that you shoot yourself in the foot. So trust yourself and keep things moving forwards for your own sake. 4. Be unapologetic. This is the key to showing you are congruence with who you are. Even if you ‘fuck up’ you didn’t mean to, and you didn’t intent to offend anyway. Unapologetic is the key to getting away with anything, similar to Stifler or James Bond. When your unapologetic you can do what you want, get away with it, and ultimately people will react to you, you don’t react to them, you’re the source of a range of emotions and stimulation and this makes you a man of value to them. 5. As a man, there is nothing someone can give you that you can’t get for yourself. As a result of natural evolution men have become socially and emotionally autonomous where are women are not. If you need people, especially women – on any level, especially for ego validation or sense of self you’re being a bitch. You will never be attractive. Remember that when you go out: your sense of self and fulfilment is something you can achieve on your own, this is not true for a woman. Realising this is the key to a natural’s frame. 6. Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn. In life, time will tick away whether you like it or not. Time is a constant. Whatever you are doing in that constant of time will be reinforced. If you are getting out there taking action, moving forward, taking responsibility you will either achieve things or learn things, making way for other achievements. The worst thing you can do with your time is nothing. Staying home, not going to the gym, not approaching, or ejecting for a worthwhile set. If you aren’t winning or learning something at every point in time in your life you will be out of congruence with your ‘man-of-action’ innate trait and you will feel bad. When you win and when you learn you feel good. Get out there. There is no failure, there is just competent and not-yet-competent. 7. Whatever you feel, she feels. Remember that women don’t judge you on your status, they don’t judge you on your looks or even on your words. They judge you and react to you based on what feeling you influence them with. That said, its most important that you are always feeling good. Best way to do this is to be a man of action with a path in life, someone who is ballsy and risk taking, someone who is daring and someone who sets out with positive intentions. You were born feeling good with self esteem, so you know that if you get back to natural state then you will feel good. Its only when you try and force things or unnatural do you lose your default good feeling. Be natural, be relaxed and you will achieve the very important goal of feeing good most of the time, and automatically make all girls feel good most of the time. You will be a fun guy to be around.
8. State is chill, not fireworks. This is a big one, most guys have no idea that state is not something exciting, not something flashy or even something extravagant, the coolest people you have known in your life and alpha males all have a chill vibe about them. This is true state, what Jeffy calls a burning coal. It is EASY to be consistently chilled-out or relaxed, it’s as simple as adopting an ‘it’s all good attitude’ and having some willpower to not let petty things get under your skin. If you’re always operating from an ‘it’s all good’ attitude, and you don’t get into bad state by letting people or incidences (the external world) get to you, then simply taking actions of your own choice (following your core) will ignite the nimbus. You will draw state from within. As a man it’s when you’re doing something you want to do that you’re most aroused. You influence others with this arousal and it makes you attractive. This state, unlike fireworks state, is the infinite well and never burns out – making you always attractive. 9. Other’s ARE socially conditioned, have empathy. It doesn’t matter what you have read or what manipulative tricks you know, IF WHAT YOUR DOING DOENST GEL WITH ANOTHER PERSON’S REALITY THEN YOUR NOT GOING TO FIT INTO THAT REALITY. What that means is, if what you’re doing – as good or as slick as you may think it is- doesn’t make sense to the people you are doing it to, you will simply be ignored or not taken seriously. Have an awareness of how those around you are socially conditioned and be responsive to that. Start within the constraints of that, then lead the interaction in your direction – your reality. Just as important, if you continue on, not aware that the way your approaching people doesn’t make sense to them, they will think you lack empathy and give rise to ‘ignore’ responses or straight up blow outs. Be calibrated, use your brains and your empathy. 10. If the girl isn’t gaming you, you’re not going to have sex with the girl. It’s true that people value something they have to work for, or something they think of as higher value than them. And this can be confusing if you are learning cold approach pick up. ‘How can I approach her, then, get the girl gaming me?’ Furthermore, to think that you have to game the girl implies that you are lesser than her, and this implication with become a self fulfilling prophecy to the girl you are interacting with. After all, the way you approach her is the way she makes up her mind about you. The way to get the girl gaming you is in the VALUE INVERSION POINT, what some people call the transition or the point when you go from 90/10 to 50/50 talking ratios. Go in chat, even entertain her and arouse emotions. Then withdraw. This usually elicits a question from the girl. Usually something chodely like ‘where are you from?’ or ‘what do you do?’. This is her gaming you, once you get this going, keep it going, answer with statements (obviously), express yourself to inspire attraction and she will continue to game you. The more she finds herself gaming you (unlike the way guys usually try and game her) the more she will find herself liking you and the closer you’ll be to sleeping with the girl. 11. Whatever you do, DON’T try for rapport. There are many levels of communication when two people interact and there are subsets of communications within them. To name a few there are verbal, non verbal and physical ways to communicate; and if you want to be more technical there are logical modalities and emotional modalities, direct or indirect. The modalities aren’t as important as using them to ensure you don’t try for rapport. In any interaction people automatically fall into a role of high value and low value. If you’re trying for rapport you will automatically communicate low value, if you don’t, you won’t communicate low value. To try and break rapport is tricky, and to force it is actually a form of trying for rapport. What you will find is that when you are completely natural, as a man, you never try for rapport, and others automatically respond by taking on a subordinate value to you. 12. The girl is down to fuck until otherwise proven innocent. And most guys shoot themselves in the foot pretty quickly, sometimes before they even approach. Many guys fail to realise that girls are constantly on the lookout for that ‘special guy’, in the same way we are on the lookout for that one hot girl in a bikini. To guys, a girl’s looks set her apart. But girls judge a guy’s behaviour, the way you behave is where your potential to be seen as a special guy lies. So when you start an interaction deep down she’s hoping to meet an awesome guy – but doesn’t expect to, and she wouldn’t even know what that looks like when it ran some game on her. If you don’t do anything offensive, or socially retarded to get yourself blown out then you give her a chance to start FINDING in you the things she
wants in a guy. Interpretation of behaviour is very subjective, and it helps that the girl is making a conscious effort in life to interpret guys in the way she hopes to see them. So do less, stay in set, don’t shoot yourself in the foot and the you give the girl a chance to be attracted to you. 13. Proactive DHV’s communicate lower value. The ideal of demonstrating higher value is as important in the game now as it ever was. But to go out of your way to demonstrate value to someone is really demonstrating lower value. To tell a clever DHV story to a girl, to do a magic trick or to run some elaborate routine is unnecessary. Proactive DHV’s are the actions of man with a mindset that ‘he is not good enough just as he is’; as opposed to a guy who just assumes value. Girls derive their attraction to you, or not, based on your mindset (which automatically generates your behaviours and autopilot responses). Proactive DHV’s is like showing a girl your Ferrari Key chain – no good because your saying to the girl that guy hiding behind the key chain isn’t enough. If you’re a cool guy the girls will know automatically, if you’re not cool they will know just as quickly. 14. Beating congruence test’s is the way to overtly DHV. If you have even known a cool person in your life you will know that it wasn’t them who convinced you they were cool, someone eluded you to the fact, or their value or ‘coolness’ became apparent when they successfully dealt with a testing situation. They don’t need to convince you they’re cool because they’re already aware they are, you only realise they’re cool once you get to know them. These types of guys are usually extremely chill and unstifled. In the club, what this translates to, is being nicely conversational and expressive. As you talk to the girl you’re bound to elicit congruence tests because that’s what girls do, and the way they interpret you is subjective. If you get a test, an awkward lull in conversation, a ‘we have to go with our friends’, an ‘ I have to go to the bathroom’ or a personal challenge from the girl this is your opportunity to demonstrate higher value with a Positive-Dominant response. You overtly show you can think for yourself, deal with tricky situations, are unreactive and you go for what you want. 15. Confidence is binary; you’re either confident or you’re a complete chode. You can’t be ninety percent confident. ‘Close but almost confident’ really means that you are just a bitch – or pretending to be a chode. The best understanding I have of confidence is confidence happens when you perceive that nothing holds you back. That’s why five year old kids can be just as confident as multi billionaires or rock stars. It’s all about not having a care in the world. Girl make a very quick attraction judgement based on your confidence which is conveyed in your behaviours. If you hold yourself back in any way... you lose. If you don’t put any mental obstacles between yourself and what you are out to achieve your confident; you’re attractive. 16. ‘Uncomfortable’ is the magic word. You know how many chodes complain that with girls ‘no means yes and yes means no’, this isn’t exactly true but it is true that girls don’t logically communicate what they’re emotionally feeling. Why do they do this? To see what your made of, if you trust yourself and if you have balls. It’s a pure alpha-ness and attractiveness gauge. Most guys don’t realise that girls very rarely communicate socially in the logical and verbal realm, most of what is said becomes redundant, and when you open your eyes to the emotional channels you will understand women much better. Most guys take a simple no, or a lack of enthusiasm from women as gospel, when realy its just a test. I can guarantee that you can take most sets or interactions MUCH further than you think you can, and she wants to see if you have the balls to. Sometimes you will be miscalibrated or you will reach your limits of the set or escalation... you will know when the limit of the interaction is when the girls uses the word ‘uncomfortable’ or any translation of that. 17. Indications of interest is when the girl is quiet and attentive. Did you used to read the old emails that advocated that a girl liked you when she licked her lips/played with her hair/touched your arm/took off her skirt? Most did, and most guys are looking for some kind of guidelines to when a girl likes him so he can eliminate the risk of rejection and his chode world coming collapsing down. What’s worse is when you’re searching for traditional ‘IOI’s’ you set out to suck them out of the girl which makes your behaviour even worse. Furthermore, girls rarely think to themselves ‘yes Jessica, I like this guy, I hope he will kiss me in the night’ I’m sure that does happen, but if you’re waiting for that then you’re not going to get the girl because you will miss your window of opportunity. A part of
her liking you is when you assume she is interested in you, she will be attracted to a guy with that reality. So, if your still looking for a way to tell if a girl might be interesting in becoming attracted to you look for the ones that are nervous and attentive to you. Quiet, but paying attention to you. This is the same behaviour that a guy would exhibit for a girl that he was very attracted to. 18. Don’t ‘know’; grow. If you’re coming into the community looking to learn how to become a guy who is good with girls it makes sense to you that you need to logically learn something in order to become a guy who is good with girls. No, the game isn’t about learning – the game is all about growing. The reason why ideas, moves and techniques can be appealing is the way they inflate your ego and your false sense of self. Really, knowing inflates your ego, messes up your identity and suppresses your natural self beneath it. To learn human interaction is a intuitive, intangible thing and very difficult to measure. Unless you have academy award winning acting skills there is no way to truly fake it till you make it with learned knowledge because incongruence will still be communicated. Use the knowledge you are gathering from others to guide your growth and change your mindset so you can grow into the guy that you are supposed to be. 19. It is impossible to become a guy who is good with girls. Although the allure of the community advertises that you can ‘become a pimp with women’ and you will be able to ‘fuck 10’s’ it is wrong to say that you will ever be a guy who is good with girls. To say that, is to say that you are above the process and you are not a guy who is going to take action. To identify with ‘being good with girls’ is to cease to take action on a daily basis and lazily rest on your laurels. If you don’t take action then you will cease to approach, cease to move things forward and cease to be good with girls. Some guys get a sharp reality shock when they realise that they can’t ever become a ‘guy who’s good with girls’. But the sooner you realise it’s a futile pursuit the sooner you realise that you have to continue to take action on any given night in any given set. As a man it is correct to identify with being ‘a man of action’ – because that’s what you physically and biologically are. Instead of looking to achieve the identity of being ‘a guy who’s good with girls’ seek to identify yourself as a ‘guy who is always continuing to get good with girls. This is the road to Pick up mastery. 20. Inspire attraction, don’t seduce it. Express yourself, don’t impress others. Whether or not you can be attractive to someone is completely subjective and thus, unpredictable. You can have no idea what will turn on different people, especially when you are cold approaching lots of them. So instead of focusing your efforts on what will impress them and what impression you are going to make, do the things that is sure to inspire attraction in everyone. When you shift your focus from setting out to impress people to, instead, expressing yourself and doing the things that you know will inspire attraction; you’re reality strengthens significantly, others react to you, you become unstifled and most importantly you have lots of fun. They fact that you’re not out to seduce attractive form women and instead are out to inspire it communicates to women you approach that you have all the trust in yourself that you have enough and are enough to be attractive to them. You inspire it in women, you don’t need to trick it out of them, and they come to you. 21. Be involvement worthy. The best way to go about natural game is to be someone worthy of involvement. The best way to think of being good at natural game is to be continually asking yourself ‘Am I being involvement worthy?’. This paradigm has massive emphasis on responsibility, proactivity and leading. When you continually ask yourself ‘am I involvement worthy’ you move into a headspace where you are continually drawing on yourself to get things started, move conversations forward, formulate ideas and extrapolate social opportunities. In accordance with other natural game principles you know that you’re not going to get the girl unless she’s gaming you, if you’re conversational, assertive and making situations fun then the girls will take it upon themselves to make the most of your time and vie for more of it. Being involvement worthy is like wild male animals expressing themselves hoping to find a mate. In this day and age the guy who has the most to say, is the least stifled and the most expressive that will be the most involvement worthy and get the most girls.
22. Get yourself into state. One of the primary differences between men and women is where they get their state from. Women get their state from their environment, whereas men don’t. Higher forces take care of women’s state, but men are indifferent to them. A man’s default state is a chill relaxed positive feeling, in a noisy pumping venue, that’s your baseline, but that’s not enough to be calibrated. A man’s state is proportionate to his ability to be present, positive, dominant and active. If you’re not getting yourself into state the environment will eclipse you and put you deep inside your head. Get busy, do something positive; entertain yourself with stupid bar games. Do something dominant; arm wrestle your friends, lead a girl by the hand, be loud or stand up tall. Do something pro-active, open sets, move around, dance and escalate with girls. These are the best ways to get into state. Another rule of thumb is ‘motion is emotion’, take action and move yourself around, dance, clap your hands and bob your knees and state will come. No one else will do it for you. 23. Keep Things Simple While Learning. Once you make a significant transformation towards a guy who is in congruence with himself you will realise that natural game is a minimalist thing; you’re strong reality and intent leading the girl with continual calibrated responsivity. But if you still have lots of mental noise from residual social conditioning make an effort to keep things simple, your end goal should always be ‘no mind, all intuition’. So when you go out make an effort to think about only three things for once. If your new, three good things are ‘friendly, unapologetic, draw state from within’. A more intermediate three might be ‘assertiveness with a smile, lead, can’t get blown out from escalating’ and an advanced three might be ‘every man starts equal, be 100% honest with yourself and others, and persistence beat resistance’. If you go out while you’re learning the game with truckloads of theory spinning around in your head you will only get out of state and reverse good progress you have made. It’s likely that you would be so inside your complicated head that you don’t even approach. 24. There is no such thing as a crush; ice cream theory. The classical notion of ‘having a crush on a girl’ is one of the most unnatural and destructive forces that counter natural game. The Dynamics of the crush is one of the biggest limiting factors fort guys learning natural game. To have a crush on a girl is to build up an idea of her in your own mind that is completely fabricated and usually vastly different from reality. People think they have a crush on a girl because having a girl who is their ‘type’ appeals to their ego and their attempt to project a particular sense of self. You don’t know a person, or a girl, until you have spent a lot of time with them. It’s natural that you treat everyone equally and don’t assume anything and wait and see if you cultivate affection for the girl or not. When you develop a crush on a girl you go into chode mode. Even when you get the girl you have a crush on you will eventually get a reality shock when you realise what you thought she was isn’t what she actually is. All attractive girls are good. Like flavours of ice cream, appreciate them all, and after lots of experience then you can develop a preference. 25. For cold approaches social versatility is the most important thing, ‘clicking’. On the broadest scale of picking up girls from cold approaches socially versatility is the most important thing. Not your skills, or your methods or structures. If you are going to make cold approaches on strangers you need to have the versatility and manoeuvrability in who you are and your personal boundaries in order to click with and get into conversation with anyone. An egotistical person usually has an identity that hold blind spots and can cause him to have friction with new people that he meets including girls he’s cold approaching. An ‘easy going’ type of guy, a guy with self esteem and no ego, isn’t restrained by a reality and an identity that he is bound to – or that he feels he has to project onto others. The result is he clicks with everyone and assumes nothing. When you are a fluid and socially versatile, egoless, guy you become someone that everyone likes to hang out with because they are all coming from the same headspace of’ trying to make an impression’. When they interact with you they will feel as though they have made just the impression they want, and you will stoke their ego. Stoking the ego of other’s especially girls, leaves them wanting more of it, people will look to you to ‘fill their bucket with a hole in it.’
26. Its incongruent of you not to be sexual. One of the things that students of natural game most often forget is their tenancy to be sexual. A nice guy who has undergone the transformation to sexworthy guy was once a nice guy and still harbours reserved and stifled physical tendencies. If your an alpha male and attractive to girls, and you don’t have a physical and sexual dimension to your game, girls will become weirded out by you and leave you cold. When you become advanced your approach will be great and most girls will like you a lot immediately, but sooner or later if you don’t take things sexual you will miss your ‘window of opportunity’. If you don’t have the sexual and physical dimension to your game the girls will have a bruised ego that a guy who they liked and found was attractive didn’t want to make a move on her and they will quickly disassociate with you to minimalize ego bruising. Or, they will go from thinking you are a fun dominant alpha male, to thinking you are just a garden variety nice guy, and no girls are attracted to a nice guy. 27. The most important thing is to feel good, be fulfilled – not happy. The first judgement a girl will make of you when you cold approach her is whether or not she gets a good feeling from you. Do you increase her life experience or do you take away from it. It’s all well and good to be happy in the club, but a happy feeling is a fleeting and superficial thing. If you have fulfilment in your life then you will constantly have a feeling of confidence, security and positivity. Girls are not necessarily looking for a happy feeling from guys, they are looking to him to she is he feels good, fulfilled and secure in himself, to hang out with a guy who is fulfilled and secure in himself will give a girl very good feelings and she will know if your fulfilled in your life almost immediately. To be fulfilled have a purpose and a direction in life, this is to be in congruence with always being a man of action. Others ways to find fulfilment as a man are to positively lead others, take action and always be progressing. Simple things to achieve to ensure you have good natural game when it comes to cold approaching. 28. There is no right thing to say, it’s the right thing to say because you are the one who’s saying it. This is the best possible summary of natural game, and it in sharp contrast to traditional ideas about game. On the purest level natural game is about being resourceful and relying on yourself. This ties in with idea of creativity, spontaneity and ‘turning nothing into something’. Evolutionarily, it was the cavemen who could completely rely on themselves and trust themselves – not need advice or guidance from others – that set off the attraction triggers in cave women’s heads. A man who can turn nothing into something through action an responsibility has evolutionary advantages that other don’t have, and a guy like this generates natural attraction, and is good at natural game. When you realise that there is no ‘one right thing’ to do or say at any time in the game you become unstifled in such a way that you can do everything with conviction –whether good or bad - and this communicates confidence and inspires attraction. The minute you look to others to for the right thing to do or say you communicate all the wrong things. When you realise that there is nothing ‘right to say’ it’s as though a weight has been lifted off your shoulders, and you establish an unwavering feeling of fulfilment and posivity in you that will make you an elite level natural gamer.
Here are the 28 points in their entirety. Be Yourself. Be Natural. Don’t calculate and micromanage. Be unapologetic. As a man, there is nothing someone can give you that you can’t get for yourself. Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn. Whatever you feel, she feels. State is chill, not fireworks. Other’s ARE socially conditioned, have empathy. If the girl isn’t gaming you, you’re not going to have sex with the girl. Whatever you do, DON’T try for rapport. The girl is down to fuck until otherwise proven innocent. Proactive DHV’s communicate lower value. Beating congruence test’s is the way to overtly DHV. Confidence is binary; you’re either confident or you’re a complete chode. ‘Uncomfortable’ is the magic word. Indications of interest is when the girl is quiet and attentive. Don’t ‘know’; grow. It is impossible to become a guy who is good with girls. Inspire attraction, don’t seduce it. Express yourself, don’t impress others. Be involvement worthy. Get yourself into state. Keep Things Simple While Learning. There is no such thing as a crush; ice cream theory. For cold approaches social versatility is the most important thing, ‘clicking’ Its incongruent of you not to be sexual. The most important thing is to feel good, be fulfilled – not happy There is no right thing to say, it’s the right thing to say because you are the one who’s saying it. ...Print it out and put it somewhere you’re going to read it every day.
Alexander~
