Wicked

ACT I, SCENE 1 (We see a gigantic peaked black hat being used as a symbol to celebrate the Wicked Witch’s demise. Suddenly CITIZENS OF OZ spill out, cheering and celebrating. The hat disappears and we are outside the Wizard’s Palace, in the Emerald City, capital of the Land of Oz) ALL GOOD NEWS! SHE’S DEAD! THE WITCH OF THE WEST IS DEAD! THE WICKEDEST WITCH THERE EVER WAS THE ENEMY OF ALL US HERE IN OZ IS DEAD! GOOD NEWS! GOOD NEWS! SOMEONE IN THE CROWD Look! It’s Glinda! (GLINDA, resplendent and beautiful in her gown and tiara, descends from the sky on a mechanical device that spews soap bubbles as the CELEBRANTS point and cheer.) VARIOUS FANATICS Is it really her? It is, it’s her! Glinda! We love yeeew, Glindaaaaa! GLINDA It’s good to see me, isn’t it? FANATICS (Shrieks) Yes! GLINDA No need to respond—that was rhetorical. (She smiles down on them) Fellow Ozians— (Sings) LET US BE GLAD LET US BE GRATEFUL LET US REJOICIFY THAT GOODNESS COULD SUBDUE THE WICKED WORKINGS OF YOU-KNOW-WHO ISN’T IT NICE TO KNOW THAT GOOD WILL CONQUER EVIL? THE TRUTH WE ALL BELIEVE’LL BY AND BY OUTLIVE A LIE FOR YOU AND— SOMEONE IN THE CROWD Glinda! Exactly how dead is she?

GLINDA Because there has been so much rumor and speculation—innuendo, outuendo—let me set the record straight: According to the Time Dragon Clock, The Melting occurred at the thirteenth hour, the direct result of a bucket of water thrown by a female child. Yes, the Wicked Witch of the West is dead. SOMEONE IN THE CROWD NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED ANOTHER PERSON NO ONE CRIES: “THEY WON’T RETURN!” ALL NO ONE LAYS A LILY ON THEIR GRAVE MAN THE GOOD MAN SCORNS THE WICKED! WOMEN THROUGH THEIR LIVES, OUR CHILDREN LEARN: ALL WHAT WE MISS WHEN WE MISBEHAVE… GLINDA AND GOODNESS KNOWS THE WICKED’S LIVES ARE LONELY GOODNESS KNOWS THE WICKED DIE ALONE IT JUST SHOWS WHEN YOU’RE WICKED YOU’RE LEFT ONLY ON YOUR OWN… ALL YES, GOODNESS KNOWS THE WICKED’S LIVES ARE LONELY GOODNESS KNOWS THE WICKED CRY ALONE NOTHING GROWS FOR THE WICKED THEY REAP ONLY WHAT THEY’VE SOWN… GIRL IN THE CROWD Glinda, why does Wickedness happen? GLINDA That’s a good question. One that many people find confusifying: Are people born Wicked? Or do they have Wickedness thrust upon them? After all, she had a childhood. She had a father… who just happened to be the Governor of Munchkinland…

(From out of the past appears a somber-looking man: the WITCH’S FATHER) WITCH’S FATHER I’m off to the Assembly, dear! GLINDA And she had a mother. As so many do… (A hauntingly beautiful woman rushes to the SOMBER MAN’S side: the WITCH’S MOTHER) WITCH’S FATHER OH… HOW I HATE TO GO AND LEAVE YOU LONELY WITCH’S MOTHER THAT’S ALRIGHT—IT’S ONLY JUST ONE NIGHT WITCH’S FATHER BUT KNOW THAT YOU’RE HERE IN MY HEART WHILE I’M OUT OF YOUR SIGHT… (The FATHER leaves, and instantly, the MOTHER wipes his kiss from her cheek. She opens a door…) GLINDA And like every family—they had their secrets. (And her LOVER, a mysterious man whose face remains in the shadows, appears.) LOVER HAVE ANOTHER DRINK, MY DARK-EYED BEAUTY I’VE GOT ONE MORE NIGHT LEFT HERE IN TOWN SO HAVE ANOTHER DRINK OF GREEN ELIXIR AND WE’LL HAVE OURSELVES A LITTLE MIXER HAVE ANOTHER LITTLE SWALLOW, LITTLE LADY, AND FOLLOW ME DOWN… (THEY kiss; sink to the floor. The LOVER disappears. The MOTHER struggles back to her feet, now hugely pregnant—) GLINDA But from the moment she was born she was… well, different. (Suddenly the WITCH’S MOTHER clutches herself, in pain…) WITCH’S MOTHER Agghhh!! (The WITCH’S FATHER rushes in, along with a MIDWIFE, who happens to be an Antelope. THEY hold her—)

MIDWIFE It’s coming… WITCH’S FATHER Now? MIDWIFE The baby’s coming… WITCH’S FATHER And how! MIDWIFE I SEE A NOSE… WITCH’S FATHER I SEE A CURL… MIDWIFE & WITCH’S FATHER IT’S A HEALTHY PERFECT LOVELY LITTLE… MIDWIFE Ohhhhh! WITCH’S FATHER Sweet Oz! WITCH’S MOTHER What is it? What’s wrong? MIDWIFE HOW CAN IT BE? WITCH’S FATHER WHAT DOES IT MEAN? MIDWIFE IT’S ATROCIOUS! WITCH’S FATHER IT’S OBSCENE! MIDWIFE & WITCH’S FATHER LIKE A FROGGY, FERNY CABBAGE THE BABY IS UNNATURALLY— ALL GREEN!!

WITCH’S FATHER Take it away. Take it away…! GLINDA So you see—it couldn’t have been easy! (The scene rushes back to the present.) CROWD NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED NOW AT LAST, SHE’S DEAD AND GONE NOW AT LAST, THERE’S JOY THROUGHOUT THE LAND AND GOODNESS KNOWS GLINDA GOODNESS KNOWS… CROWD WE KNOW WHAT GOODNESS IS GLINDA HER LIFE WAS LONLEY… CROWD GOODNESS KNOWS… GLINDA GOODNESS KNOWS… CROWD THE WICKED DIE ALONE… GLINDA SHE DIED ALONE… CROWD WOE TO THOSE WHO SPURN WHAT GOODNESS IS THEY ARE SHOWN NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED… GLINDA GOOD NEWS! CROWD NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED! GLINDA

GOOD NEWS! CROWD NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED! WICKED! WICKED! GLINDA Well, this has been fun. But as you can imagine, I have much to attend to, what with the Wizard’s unexpected departure. And so, if there are no further questions— (Suddenly, SOMEONE IN THE CROWD interrupts her.) PERSON IN THE CROWD Glinda! Is it true—you were her friend?! (The CROWD gasps in disbelief. GLINDA freezes, completely thrown.) GLINDA Uhm… Well, I… I… Yes. (The CROWD gasps) GLINDA Well, it depends on what you mean by “friend”. I did know her. That is, our paths did cross. At school… but you must understand it was along time ago… and we were both very young… (And once again, the past comes alive. For GLINDA suddenly sees—her friend ELPHABA, just as she was on the day the GALINDA (as she was known then) first laid eyes on her, young, hopeful, and … green.) ACT I, SCENE 2 (In a parlor at Shiz University, the incoming STUDENTS gather.) STUDENTS O HALLOWED HALLS AND VINE-DRAPPED WALLS… THE PROUDLIEST SIGHT THERE IS WHEN GREY AND SERE OUR HAIR HATH TURNED WE SHALL STILL REVERE THE LESSONS LEARNED IN OUR DAYS AT DEAR OLD SHIZ OUR DAYS AT DEAR OLD… (GALINDA is the last to arrive, perched on an enormous stack of luggage.) GALINDA OH-OH-OH-OH-OLD…

STUDENTS & GALINDA DEAR OLD SHIZ-ZZZZ… (GALINDA and all the other STUDENTS rudely gape at ELPHABA.) ELPHABA What? What are you all looking at? Oh—do I have something in my teeth? Alright, fine—we might as well get this over with: No, I’m not seasick; yes, I’ve always been green; no, I didn’t eat grass as a child… (The WITCH’S FATHER enters wheeling in NESSAROSE) WITCH’S FATHER Elphaba! ELPHABA This is my younger sister, Nessarose! As you can see she’s a perfectly normal color! WITCH’S FATHER Elphaba! Stop making a spectacle of yourself. Remember, I’m only sending you to this school for one reason. ELPHABA I know: to look after Nessa. WITCH’S FATHER My precious little girl: a parting gift. NESSAROSE Father… Jeweled Shoes?! WITCH’S FATHER As befits the future Governor of Munchkinland. Elphaba, take care of your sister. And try not to talk so much. (The WITCH’S FATHER exits.) NESSAROSE Elphaba… ELPHABA Well, what could he get me? I clash with everything! (MADAME MORRIBLE, the school’s headmistress, enters.) MORRIBLE Welcome! Welcome, new students! I am Madame Morrible, head mistress here at Shiz University. And whether you are here to study law, logic or linguification I know I speak for my fellow faculty member when I say: We have nothing but the highest hopes, for some of you. Oh, you must be the Governor’s

daughter! Miss Nessarose, isn’t it? What a tragically beautiful face you have! And who is— (MORRIBLE sees ELPHABA and screams.) ELPHABA I’m the other daughter, Elphaba. I’m beautifully tragic. MORRIBLE I see, well I’m sure you’re very bright! GALINDA Bright?! She’s phosphorescent! (The STUDENTS laugh) MORRIBLE Now, regarding room assignments. (ELPHABA and GALINDA raise their hands) MORRIBLE Is this regarding room assignments? GALINDA No, but thank you for asking, Madame Morrible, I’ve already been assigned a private suite. But you all can come visit me whenever you want! PFANNEE How good of you! SHENSHEN You are so good! GALINDA No I’m not! PFANNEE & SHENSHEN Yes you are! GALINDA Now stop it! MORRIBLE Do you have a question? GALINDA Oh yes—you see, I am Galinda Upland, of the Upper Uplands? I’ve applied to your sorcery seminar. Perhaps you recall my entrance essay—“Magic Wands: Need They Have a Point?”

MORRIBLE Yes, however, I do not teach my seminar every semester, of course if someone special were to come along— GALINDA Well, exactly! ELPHABA Madame Morrible, we have not yet received our room assignments. MORRIBLE The Governor made his concerns for you sister’s wellbeing quite apparent. She will share my compartment, where I can assist her as needed. ELPHABA But I’ve always looked after my sister! NESSAROSE Elphaba! MORRIBLE He never mentioned you. Just a slight gulch, no need to fret, we will find some place to put you. ELPHABA But, Madame… GALINDA You know, I don’t even think she read my essay! BOQ That is so unfair! You should say something! GALINDA Should I? MORRIBLE Attention! Which of you young ladies will volunteer to share with Miss Elphaba? GALINDA Madame Morrible— MORRIBLE Oh, thank you dear! That is very good of you! GALINDA What? MORRIBLE Yes, now you see Miss Elphaba, you can room with Miss Galinda! To your rooms, young ladies!

(MADAME MORRIBLE starts to wheel NESSAROSE away.) ELPHABA No, wait! NESSAROSE Elphaba, please, I’ll be alright! ELPHABA But I promised father! MORRIBLE Young gentlemen, to your rooms! ELPHABA Let her go!!! (ELPHABA loses control and makes something magical occur. NESSAROSE is mortified.) MORRIBLE How did you do that? GALINDA How did she do that? NESSAROSE Elphaba, you promised things would be different here! MORRIBLE You mean this has happened before? ELPHABA Well, something just comes over me sometimes, it’s something I can’t describe. I’ll try to control myself. I am so sorry, Nessa. MORRIBLE What?! Never apologize for talent! Talent is a gift! And that is my special talent, encouraging talent! Have you ever considered a career in sorcery? ELPHABA Not really… MORRIBLE I shall tutor you privately—and take no other students! GALINDA What?!

MORRIBLE MANY YEARS I HAVE WAITED FOR A GIFT LIKE YOURS TO APPEAR WHY, I PREDICT THE WIZARD COULD MAKE YOU HIS MAGIC GRAND VIZIER! ELPHABA The Wizard!? MORRIBLE MY DEAR, MY DEAR I’LL WRITE AT ONCE TO THE WIZARD— TELL HIM OF YOU IN ADVANCE WITH A TALENT LIKE YOURS, DEAR THERE IS A DEFIN-ISH CHANCE IF YOU WORK AS YOU SHOULD— YOU’LL BE MAKING GOOD… GALINDA Now, Madame— MORRIBLE Not now, dear. Shoo! Shoo, shoo, shoo! (MADAME MORRIBLE and the CROWD disperse) GALINDA Something’s wrong. I didn’t get my way. I need to go lie down! (ELPHABA is left alone, dazed but thrilled.) ELPHABA DID THAT REALLY JUST HAPPEN? HAVE I ACTUALLY UNDERSTOOD? THIS WEIRD QUIRK I'VE TRIED TO SURPRESS OR HIDE IS A TALENT THAT COULD HELP ME MEET THE WIZARD IF I MAKE GOOD SO I'LL MAKE GOOD… WHEN I MEET THE WIZARD, ONCE I PROVE MY WORTH, AND THEN I MEET THE WIZARD, WHAT I'VE WAITED FOR SINCE—SINCE BIRTH! AND WITH ALL HIS WIZARD WISDOM BY MY LOOKS HE WON'T BE BLINDED DO YOU THINK THE WIZARD IS DUMB?

OR LIKE MUNCHKINS, SO SMALL-MINDED? NO! HE'LL SAY TO ME: "I SEE WHO YOU TRULY ARE, A GIRL ON WHOM I CAN RELY!" AND THAT'S HOW WE'LL BEGIN THE WIZARD AND I… ONCE I'M WITH THE WIZARD, MY WHOLE LIFE WILL CHANGE 'CUZ ONCE YOU'RE WITH THE WIZARD NO ONE THINKS YOU'RE STRANGE NO FATHER IS NOT PROUD OF YOU NO SISTER ACTS ASHAMED AND ALL OF OZ HAS TO LOVE YOU WHEN BY THE WIZARD, YOU'RE ACLAIMED AND THIS GIFT—OR THIS CURSE— I HAVE INSIDE MAYBE AT LAST, I'LL KNOW WHY WHEN WE ARE HAND IN HAND— THE WIZARD AND I! AND ONE DAY, HE'LL SAY TO ME: "ELPHABA, A GIRL WHO IS SO SUPERIOR, SHOULDN'T A GIRL WHO'S SO GOOD INSIDE HAVE A MATCHING EXTERIOR? AND SINCE FOLKS HERE TO AN ABSURD DEGREE SEEM FIXATED ON YOUR VERDEGRIS WOULD IT BE ALRIGHT BY YOU IF I DE-GREENIFY YOU?" AND THOUGH OF COURSE THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT TO ME "ALL RIGHT, WHY NOT?" I'LL REPLY OH, WHAT A PAIR WE'LL BE THE WIZARD AND I… YES, WHAT A PAIR WE'LL BE THE WIZARD AND... UNLIMITED! MY FUTURE IS UNLIMITED AND I'VE JUST HAD A VISION ALMOST LIKE A PROPHECY I KNOW—IT SOUNDS TRULY CRAZY AND TRUE, THE VISION'S HAZY BUT I SWEAR, SOME DAY THERE'LL BE A CELEBRATION THROUGHOUT OZ THAT'S ALL TO DO WITH ME! AND I'LL STAND THERE WITH THE WIZARD FEELING THINGS I'VE NEVER FELT AND THOUGH I'D NEVER SHOW IT

I'LL BE SO HAPPY, I COULD MELT! AND SO IT WILL BE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE AND I'LL WANT NOTHING ELSE TILL I DIE HELD IN SUCH HIGH ESTEEM! WHEN PEOPLE SEE ME THEY WILL SCREAM FOR HALF OF OZ'S FAVORITE TEAM: THE WIZARD AND I! ACT I, SCENE 3 (GALINDA and ELPHABA are in their dormitory room, both dutifully writing home.) GALINDA Dearest darlingest Momsie and Popsicle… ELPHABA My dear Father… BOTH THERE’S BEEN SOME CONFUSION OVER ROOMING HERE AT SHIZ… ELPHABA BUT OF COURSE, I’LL CARE FOR NESSA… GALINDA BUT OF COURSE, I’LL RISE ABOVE IT… BOTH FOR I KNOW THAT’S HOW YOU’D WANT ME TO RESPOND YES, THERE’S BEEN SOME CONFUSSION FOR YOU SEE, MY ROOMMATE IS… GALINDA UNUSUALLY AND EXCEEDINGLY PECULIAR AND ALTOGETHER QUITE IMPOSSIBLE TO DESCRIBE… ELPHABA BLONDE. GALINDA WHAT IS THIS FEELING SO SUDDEN AND NEW? ELPHABA I FELT THE MOMENT I LAID EYES ON YOU

GALINDA MY PULSE IS RUSHING… ELPHABA MY HEAD IS REELING… GALINDA MY FACE IS FLUSHING… BOTH WHAT IS THIS FEELING? FERVID AS A FLAME DOES IT HAVE A NAME YES!: LOATHING UNADULTERATED LOATHING… GALINDA FOR YOUR FACE… ELPHABA YOUR VOICE… GALINDA YOUR CLOTHING… BOTH LET’S JUST SAY—I LOATHE IT ALL! EV’RY LITTLE TRAIT, HOWEVER SMALL MAKES MY VERY FLESH BEGIN TO CRAWL WITH SIMPLE UTTER LOATHING THERE’S A STRANGE EXHILARATION IN SUCH TOTAL DETESTAION IT’S SO PURE! SO STRONG! THOUGH I DO ADMIT IT CAME ON FAST STILL I DO BELIEVE THAT IT CAN LAST AND I WILL BE LOATHING LOATHING YOU MY WHOLE LIFE LONG! STUDENTS DEAR GALINDA, YOU ARE JUST TOO GOOD! HOW DO YOU STAND IT? I DON’T THINK I COULD! SHE’S A TERROR! SHE’S A TARTAR! WE DON’T MEAN TO SHOW A BIAS BUT GALINDA YOU’RE A MARTYR!

GALINDA WELL… THESE THINGS ARE SENT TO TRY US! STUDENTS POOR GALINDA, FORCED TO RESIDE WITH SOMEONE SO DISGUSTICIFIED WE JUST WANT TO TELL YOU: WE’RE ALL ON YOUR SIDE! WE SHARE YOUR… GALINDA & ELPHABA WHAT IS THIS FEELING SO SUDDEN AND NEW? I FELT THE MOMENT I LAID EYES ON YOU MY PULSE IS RUSHING MY HEAD IS REELING OH, WHAT IS THIS FEELING?

STUDENTS LOATHING UNADULTERATED LOATHING FOR HER FACE, HER VOICE HER CLOTHING LET’S JUST SAY: WE LOATHE IT ALL! EV’RY LITTLE TRAIT HOWEVER SMALL MAKES OUR VERY FLESH BEGIN TO CRAWL… AHHH…

DOES IT HAVE A NAME? YES… AHHH… ALL LOATHING! GALINDA & ELPHABA THERE’S A STRANGE EXHILARATION IN SUCH TOTAL DETESTATION SO PURE, SO STRONG!

STUDENTS LOATHING LOATHING STUDENTS

SO STRONG! GALINDA & ELPHABA THOUGH I DO ADMIT IT CAME ON FAST STILL I DO BELIEVE THAT IT CAN LAST GALINDA & ELPHABA AND I WILL BE LOATHING FOR FOREVER LOATHING TRULY, DEEPLY LOATHING YOU FOR MY WHOLE LIFE LONG!

STUDENTS LOATHING LOATHING LOATHING YOU LOATHING, UNADULTERATED LOATHING ELPHABA

Boo!

GALINDA Ahhh! (ELPHABA laughs) ACT I, SCENE 4 (In a lecture hall, the STUDENTS take their seats for DOCTOR DILLAMOND’S class. DOCTOR DILLAMOND is a Goat.) DILLAMOND Settle down, students! Settle down now! I have read your most recent essays and I am amazed to report some progress. Although some of us still tend to favor form over content. Miss Glinda. GALINDA It’s Galinda with a Ga. DILLAMOND Yes, of course. Miss Glinda. GALINDA I really don’t see what the problem is, every other professor seems to able to pronounce my name. ELPHABA Maybe perfecting the pronunciation of your precious name is not the sole focus of Doctor Dillamond’s life. And maybe he’s not like every other professor. Maybe some of us are different! GALINDA Well, it seems the artichoke is steamed! (The STUDENTS laugh) DILLAMOND Class! Class! Miss Elphaba has a point. Doubtless you’ve noticed I am the sole Animal on the faculty. The Token Goat as it were. But it wasn’t always this way. My dear students, how I wish you could have known this place as it once was. When one could walk these halls and hear an Antelope explicating a sonnet, a Snow Leopard solving a equation, a Wildebeest waxing philosophic! Can you see, dear students, what is being lost? How our dear Oz is becoming less and less… well, colorful. Now, who can tell me what set this into motion? ELPHABA From what I read it began with the Great Drought. DILLAMOND Precisely! Food grew scarce, people grew hungrier and angrier and the question became “whom can we blame?” Can anyone tell me what is meant by the term “Scapegoat”? Someone besides Miss Elphaba. Yes, Miss Glinda. GALINDA

It’s Galinda with a Ga. And I don’t see why you can’t just teach us history instead of always harping on the past. DILLAMOND Well, perhaps these questions that I’ve prepared— (As he turns his chalkboard around to pose the question, he sees that, across the board, someone has painted: “Animals should be seen and not heard.” DILLAMOND is shocked.) DILLAMOND Who is responsible for this? I’m waiting for an answer. Very well, that will be all for today. You heard me, class dismissed! (Only ELPHABA lingers.) ELPHABA You go ahead, Nessa. “Animals should be seen and not heard?!” DILLAMOND Oh, Miss Elphaba, don’t worry about me. Go and join your friends. ELPHABA That’s alright, I have no friends. Would you like to share my lunch? DILLAMOND Thank you. How kind. I’ve seemed to have lost my appetite. ELPHABA You shouldn’t let ignorant statements like that bother you. I mean, I always do, but you shouldn’t. DILLAMOND Oh, Miss Elphaba—if only it were just a matter of words on a chalkboard! But the things one hears these days. Dreadful things… (Sings) I’VE HEARD OF AN OX A PROFESSOR FROM QUOX NO LONGER PERMITTED TO TEACH WHO HAS LOST ALL POWERS OF SPEECH… ELPHABA What? DILLAMOND AND AN OWL IN MUNCHKIN ROCK A VICAR WITH A THRIVING FLOCK FOBIDDEN TO PREACH NOW HE ONLY CAN SCREECH ONLY RUMORS—BUT STILL— ENOUGH TO GIVE PAUSE

TO ANYONE WITH PAWS SOMETHING BAD IS HAPPENING IN OZ… ELPHABA SOMETHING BAD? HAPPENING IN OZ…? DILLAMOND UNDER THE SURFACE BEHIND THE SCENES SOMETHING BAAAAAAD… (They’re both startled by an unfamiliar sound. It’s coming from DOCTOR DILLAMOND himself—a kind of belting. DILLAMOND hastily covers his mouth, clears his throat.) DILLAMOND BAD. ELPHABA Doctor Dillamond, are you alright? Shall I fetch you a glass of water? DILLAMOND No, I don’t know what came over me. ELPHABA So you’re saying that there are Animals that have somehow forgotten how to speak? How is that possible? DILLAMOND Well with so much pressure not to. If you make it discouraging enough you can keep anyone silent. But I for one will never… (MADAME MORRIBLE enters.) DILLAMOND Oh, Madame Morrible! MORRIBLE I heard there was some sort of disturberance in class. Are you alright, Doctor? And Miss Elphaba, you’re still here? I thought you’d be on your way to my seminar by now. ELPHABA Yes, Madame, I would be but… MORRIBLE But? I do hope I haven’t misplaced my trust in you. Magic is a demanderating mistress, and if one’s ambition is to meet the Wizard. I’m sure Doctor Dillamond sees my point. (MADAME MORRIBLE exits.)

ELPHABA I better go. Doctor Dillamond, if something bad is happening to the Animals, someone’s got to tell the Wizard! He’ll make it right! That’s why we have a Wizard— (Sings) SO NOTHING BAD… DILLAMOND I hope you’re right— BOTH NOTHING ALL THAT BAD… DILLAMOND NOTHING TRULY BAAAAAAAAD… SORRY—BAD… (Unsettled, DOCTOR DILLAMOND leaves the classroom. ELPHABA watches him go…) ELPHABA IT COULDN’T HAPPEN HERE IN OZ… ACT I, SCENE 5 (In the courtyard, a new student arrives.) ELPHABA Hey! AVARIC Be quiet, miss, you’ll disturb him! ELPHABA I certainly will! Hey, you! Wake up! AVARIC Young lady, do you realize who this is?! ELPHABA I don’t care who he is! Your cart nearly knocked me over and you’re sleeping! FIYERO Of course, it’s daytime. Well, see you soon, Avaric. I’m sure I won’t last any longer at this school then I did at any of the others. (AVARIC exits.) ELPHABA Is this really how you go through life? Nearly knocking people over and not even noticing them?!

FIYERO Well maybe the driver saw green and thought it meant go. (BOQ enters, running.) BOQ Miss Galinda! I know I’m just a mere Munchkin. But even a Munchkin has feelings! And I have tried to tell you of mine for you but sometimes it’s like you don’t even know who I am. GALINDA That’s not true, Bick. BOQ Boq. GALINDA Bick, do you realize who that is?! BOQ You’re touching me! GALINDA That is Fiyero Tigelaar! He is that Winkie Prince who’s reputation is so scandalacious! (To FIYERO) Were you looking for something or someone? FIYERO Yes, some sort of history class somewhere over there. BOQ That is the history building right down there! GALINDA That class just ended. FIYERO Perfect timing. So what does one do you fun around here? GALINDA Nothing, until now. BOQ We’ve been studying. FIYERO I see the responsibility to corrupt my fellow students falls to me. Fortunately I am up to the task. (Sings) THE TROUBLE WITH SCHOOLS IS

THEY ALWAYS TRY TO TEACH THE WRONG LESSON BELIEVE ME, I’VE BEEN KICKED OUT OF ENOUGH OF THEM TO KNOW THEY WANT TO BECOME LESS CALLOW LESS SHALLOW BUT I SAY: WHY INVITE STRESS IN? STOP STUDYING STRIFE AND LEARN TO LIVE “THE UNEXAMINED LIFE”… DANCING THROUGH LIFE SKIMMING THE SURFACE GLIDING WHERE TURF IS SMOOTH LIFE’S MORE PAINLESS FOR THE BRAINLESS WHY THINK TOO HARD? WHEN IT’S SO SOOTHING DANCING THROUGH LIFE NO NEED TO TOUGH IT WHEN YOU CAN SLOUGH IT OFF AS I DO NOTHING MATTERS BUT KNOWING NOTHING MATTERS IT’S JUST LIFE SO KEEP DANCING THROUGH… DANCING THROUGH LIFE SWAYING AND SWEEPING AND ALWAYS KEEPING COOL LIFE IS FRAUGHT LESS WHEN YOU’RE THOUGHTLESS THOSE WHO DON’T TRY NEVER LOOK FOOLISH DANCING THROUGH LIFE… MINDLESS AND CARELESS MAKE SURE YOU’RE WHERE LESS TROUBLE IS RIFE WOES ARE FLEETING BLOWS ARE GLANCING… WHEN YOU’RE DANCING… THROUGH LIFE… (speaks) So—what’s the most swankified place in town? GALINDA That would be the Ozdust Ballroom FIYERO Sounds perfect! (Sings) LET’S GO DOWN TO THE OZDUST BALLROOM

WE’LL MEET THERE LATER TONIGHT WE CAN DANCE TILL IT’S LIGHT FIND THE PRETTIEST GIRL… GIVER ‘ER A WHIRL RIGHT ON DOWN TO THE OZDUST BALLROOM COME ON—FOLLOW ME YOU’LL BE HAPPY TO BE THERE… ALL DANCING THROUGH LIFE DOWN AT THE OZDUST… FIYERO IF ONLY BECAUSE DUST IS WHAT WE COME TO… ALL NOTHING MATTERS BUT KNOWING NOTHING MATTERS IT’S JUST LIFE… FIYERO SO KEEP DANCING THROUGH… BOQ Miss Galinda—I hope you’ll save at least one dance for me. I’ll be right there. Right by your side. Waiting. All night. GALINDA Oh—that’s so kind—Bick. BOQ Boq. GALINDA But you know what would be even kinder? (Sings) SEE THAT TRAGIC’LY BEAUTIFUL GIRL THE ONE IN THE CHAIR IT SEEMS SO UNFAIR WE SHOULD GO ON A SPREE AND NOT SHE GEE— I KNOW SOMEONE WOULD BE MY HERO IF THAT SOMEONE WERE TO GO INVITE HER… BOQ Well, maybe—I could invite her!

GALINDA OH, BICK, REALLY? YOU WOULD DO THAT FOR ME!? BOQ I would do anything for you, Miss Galinda. Excuse me, Miss Nessarose? There’s something I’d like to ask you… (BOQ wheels NESSAROSE away. FIYERO approaches GALINDA with admiration.) FIYERO You’re good. GALINDA I don’t know what you mean! But I do happen to be free tonight, so… FIYERO …So I’ll be picking you up around eight? GALINDA After all— (Sings) NOW THAT WE’VE MET ONE ANOTHER… FIYERO & GALINDA IT’S CLEAR—WE DESERVE EACH OTHER GALINDA YOU’RE PERFECT… FIYERO YOU’RE PERFECT… BOTH SO WE’RE PERFECT TOGETHER BORN TO BE FOREVER… DANCING THROUGH LIFE… ACT I, SCENE 6 (ELPHABA, observing the other STUDENTS in this celebratory frenzy, expresses her disdain for FIYERO to NESSAROSE.) ELPHABA It’s absurd! This silly rich boy appears and everyone’s off to worship him and some cultish social gathering! NESSAROSE Even me! I’m going! Isn’t it wonderful? Boq was too shy to ask me at first but once Galinda

encouragerized him— ELPHABA Galinda?! NESSAROSE Don’t! Don’t you dare say another word against her. I’m about to have the first happy night of my life, thanks to Galinda. (Sings) FIN’LLY, FOR THIS ONE NIGHT I’M ABOUT TO HAVE A FUN NIGHT WITH THIS MUNCHKIN BOY GALINDA FOUND FOR ME AND I ONLY WISH THERE WERE SOMETHING I COULD DO FOR HER TO REPAY HER ELPHABA, SEE? WE DESERVE EACH OTHER AND GALINDA HELPED IT COME TRUE WE DESERVE EACH OTHER ME AND BOQ… Please, Elphaba—try to understand… ELPHABA I DO… (In the room she shares with ELPHABA, GALINDA prepares for the dance.) GALINDA Do me up. And now I must accessorize myself for Fiyero. (Two mean girls, PFANNEE and SHENSHEN, find a pointy black hat amongst GALINDA’S things.) SHENSHEN Galinda, what in Oz's name? GALINDA Pretend you didn’t see that. My granny is always buying me the most hideoteous hats. I’d give it away but I don’t hate anyone that much. PFANNEE & SHENSHEN Yes you do. GALINDA Oh no. I couldn’t. Could I? (ELPHABA comes to thank GALINDA for her kindness to NESSAROSE.)

ELPHABA Galinda—my sister and I were talking about you just now— GALINDA And I was just talking about you! I thought you might want to wear this to the party tonight! (Sings) IT’S REALLY, UH, SHARP, DON’T YOU THINK? YOU KNOW—BLACK IS THIS YEAR’S PINK YOU DESERVE EACH OTHER THIS HAT AND YOU YOU’RE BOTH SO SMART YOU DESERVE EACH OTHER SO HERE, OUT OF THE GOODNESS OF MY HEART… (Later, in the Ozdust Ballroom, FIYERO and GALINDA dance as BOQ and NESSAROSE look on.) NESSAROSE What’s in the punch? BOQ Lemons and melons and pears. NESSAROSE Oh my! BOQ LISTEN—NESSA— NESSAROSE YES? BOQ UH—NESSA I’VE GOT SOMETHING TO CONFESS, A REASON WHY, WELL—WHY I ASKED YOU HERE TONIGHT NOW I KNOW IT ISN’T FAIR… NESSAROSE Oh, Boq. I know why. BOQ You do? NESSAROSE IT’S BECAUSE I’M IN THIS CHAIR AND YOU FELT SORRY FOR ME— WELL? ISN’T THAT RIGHT?

BOQ No! No! It’s because… because… (But he can’t bring himself to tell her the truth.) BOQ BECAUSE YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL NESSAROSE OH, BOQ, I THINK YOU’RE WONDERFUL! AND WE DESERVE EACH OTHER DON’T YOU SEE, THIS IS OUR CHANCE? WE DESERVE EACH OTHER DON’T WE, BOQ? BOQ YOU KNOW WHAT? LET’S DANCE! NESSAROSE What? BOQ LET’S DANCE! (BOQ begins to wheel a smitten NESSAROSE onto the dance floor. Suddenly, MADAME MORRIBLE struts into the Ozdust.) MORRIBLE Miss Upland! GALINDA Madame Morrible! What are you doing here? MORRIBLE I have something for you. GALINDA Oh, Madame! A training wand! How can I ever express my gratitution? MORRIBLE Don’t thank me. This was your roommate’s idea, not mine. GALINDA What? Elphaba? MORRIBLE Yes, Miss Elphaba requested that I include you in sorcery class. She insisted that I tell you this very night or she would quit the seminar.

GALINDA But why? MORRIBLE I have no idea! My personal opinion is that you do not have what it takes. I hope you prove me wrong. I doubt you will! FIYERO What is it? GALINDA I got what I wanted. FIYERO So what’s the matter? GALINDA Nothing. FIYERO Good. Let’s dance. (ELPHABA walks in, wearing a pointing black hat. In a split second ELPHABA realizes that GALINDA has tricked her. The other STUDENTS laugh and point.) FIYERO Who in Oz is that? GALINDA My roommate. Please don’t stare. FIYERO How can you help it? (Determined to ignore them, ELPHABA closes her eyes and, all by herself, starts to dance—Galinda feels terrible for what she’s done.) FIYERO I’ll say this much for her: she doesn’t give a twig about what anyone else thinks. GALINDA Of coarse she does, she just pretends not to. I feel awful. FIYERO Why? It’s not like it’s your fault. GALINDA Excuse me.

(In a show of solidarity, she joins ELPHABA on the dance floor.) GALINDA May I cut in? ALL DANCING THROUGH LIFE DOWN AT THE OZDUST IF ONLY BECAUSE DUST IS WHAT WE COME TO AND THE STRANGE THING: YOUR LIFE COULD END UP CHANGING WHILE YOU’RE DANCING THROUGH! ACT I, SCENE 7 (Back in their dormitory room, ELPHABA and GALINDA have been up all night.) GALINDA Your very first party ever? ELPHABA Do funerals count? GALINDA Your very first party! I know, let’s each tell the other something we’ve never told anyone! I’ll go first! Fiyero and I are going to be married! ELPHABA He’s asked you already?! GALINDA No, he doesn’t know yet. Now you tell me a secret. ELPHABA Like what? GALINDA Like… like why do you sleep with this funny little green bottle underneath your pillow? ELPHABA Give it back! GALINDA Come on, tell me! ELPHABA

Give it to me now! GALINDA Tell me! ELPHABA It was my mothers! That’s all. GALINDA That’s not fair, I told you a really good one! ELPHABA My father hates me. (GALINDA gasps) ELPHABA That’s not the secret. The secret is he has a good reason. It’s my fault. GALINDA What? What is? ELPHABA The reason my sister is the way she is. You see, when our mother was carrying Nessa, my father began to worry that the new baby might come out… GALINDA & ELPHABA …green… ELPHABA He was so worried he made our mother chew milk flowers day and night. Only it made Nessa come too soon, with her little legs all tangled. And our mother never woke up. None of which would have ever happened if not for me. GALINDA But that was the milk flower’s fault, not yours. That may be your secret, Elphaba, but it doesn’t make it true. Look—it’s tomorrow! And Elphie—is it alright if I call you Elphie? ELPHABA Well, it’s a little perky. GALINDA And you can call me… Galinda. You see Elphie, now that we’re friends, I’ve decided to make you my new project. ELPHABA You really don’t have to do that.

GALINDA I know. That’s what make me so nice! (Sings) WHENEVER I SEE SOMEONE LESS FORTUNATE THAN I AND LET’S FACE IT—WHO ISN’T LESS FORTUNATE THAN I? MY TENDER HEART TENDS TO START TO BLEED AND WHEN SOMEONE NEEDS A MAKEOVER I SIMPLY HAVE TO TAKE OVER I KNOW I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU NEED AND EVEN IN YOUR CASE THO’ IT’S THE TOUGHEST CASE I’VE YET TO FACE DON’T WORRY—I’M DETERMINED TO SUCCEED FOLLOW MY LEAD AND YES, INDEED YOU WILL BE… POPULAR! YOU’RE GONNA BE POPULAR! I’LL TEACH YOU THE PROPER PLOYS WHEN YOU TALK TO BOYS LITTLE WAYS TO FLIRT AND FLOUNCE I’LL SHOW YOU WHAT SHOES TO WEAR HOW TO FIX YOUR HAIR EVERYTHING THAT REALLY COUNTS TO BE POPULAR! I’LL HELP YOU BE POPULAR! YOU’LL HANG WITH THE RIGHT COHORTS YOU’LL BE GOOD AT SPORTS KNOW THE SLANG YOU’VE GOT TO KNOW SO LET’S START ‘CAUSE YOU’VE GOT AN AWF’LLY LONG WAY TO GO… DON’T BE OFFENDED BY MY FRANK ANALYSIS THINK OF IT AS PERSONALITY DIALYSIS NOW THAT I’VE CHOSEN TO BECOME A PAL, A SIS— TER AND ADVISER THERE’S NOBODY WISER NOT WHEN IT COMES TO POPULAR— I KNOW ABOUT POPULAR AND WITH AN ASSIST FROM ME TO BE WHO YOU’LL BE INSTEAD OF DREARY WHO-YOU-WERE… ARE… THERE’S NOTHING THAT CAN STOP YOU FROM BECOMING POPU— LER… LAR… LA LA LA LA WE’RE GONNA MAKE

YOU POPULAR… WHEN I SEE DEPRESSING CREATURES WITH UNPREPOSSESSING FEATURES I REMIND THEM ON THEIR OWN BEHALF TO THINK OF CELEBRATED HEADS OF STATE OR ‘SPECIALLY GREAT COMMUNICATORS DID THEY HAVE BRAINS OR KNOWLEDGE? DON’T MAKE ME LAUGH! THEY WERE POPULAR! PLEASE— IT’S ALL ABOUT POPULAR! IT’S NOT ABOUT APTITUDE IT’S THE WAY YOU’RE VIEWED SO IT’S VERY SHREWD TO BE VERY VERY POPULAR LIKE ME! ELPHABA This is never going to work… GALINDA Elphie! You mustn’t think that way anymore! Your whole life is going to change! And all because of me! First: hair. See? This is how you toss your hair: Toss. Toss. (She demonstrates and ELPHABA tries.) GALINDA Well—you’ll practice! And now— (She picks up her new magic wand—it’s quite small, a training wand.) GALINDA I shall transform your simple “frock” into a magnificent ball gown. Ball gown. (She tries and fails, then examines the wand, puzzled.) GALINDA Is this thing on? ELPHABA You want me to try? GALINDA Oh, just wear the frock it’s pretty! Oh—and this! (GALINDA takes a flower from her own hair, pins in into ELPHABA’S.)

GALINDA Pink goes good with green. Why, Miss Elphaba—look at you. You’re beautiful. (She guides her friend to a mirror. ELPHABA stares at herself: For a moment it seems possible. And then—she forces herself to turn away.) ELPHABA I—I have to go— GALINDA You’re welcome! (Sings) AND THO’ YOU PROTEST YOUR DISINTEREST I KNOW CLANDESTINEDLY YOU’RE GONNA GRIN AND BEAR IT YOUR NEW-FOUND POPULARITY— LA LA LA LA YOU’LL BE POPULAR JUST NOT QUITE AS POPULAR AS ME! ACT I, SCENE 8 (In the lecture hall, ELPHABA tries to toss her hair once more.) ELPHABA Toss. Toss. What?! FIYERO Nothing. It’s just you’ve been Galindafied. “Toss. Toss.” You don’t need to do that you know. DILLAMOND Take your seats, class. Take your seats, please. I have something to say and very little time. My dear students, this is my last day here at Shiz. Animals are no longer permitted to teach. ELPHABA What?! DILLAMOND Please Miss Elphaba. I’d like to thank you all for sharing with me your enthusiasm, your essays, however feebly structured, and even on occasion your lunch. (DOCTOR DILLAMOND’S lecture is interrupted by MADAME MORRIBLE and several OZIAN OFFICIALS.) MORRIBLE Oh, Doctor, I am so terribly sorry.

ELPHABA Madame, you can’t permit this! DILLAMOND Miss Elphaba, don’t worry about me. They can take away my job but I shall continue speaking out! OZIAN OFFICIAL Come on, goat. DILLAMOND You’re not being told the whole story! Remember that, class! (DOCTOR DILLAMOND is taken away.) ELPHABA Doctor Dillamond! Well, are we all just going to sit here in silence?! MORRIBLE Miss Elphaba, I’m afraid there’s nothing we can do. ELPHABA But, Madame— MORRIBLE Please, my dear, take your seat. (One OFFICIAL takes over the class.) OZIAN OFFICIAL Good afternoon, students! MORRIBLE Good afternoon! STUDENTS Good afternoon. OZIAN OFFICIAL More and more everyday with each tick of the Time Dragon Clock in every corner of our great Oz, one hears the silence of progress! For example, this is called a cage! (He reveals this devise to the STUDENTS. There is a small Lion Cub trapped inside.) OZIAN OFFICIAL Yes, you’ll be seeing more and more of them in the future. This remarkable innovation is actually for the Animal’s own good! ELPHABA If it’s for his own good, than why is he trembling?

OZIAN OFFICIAL He’s excited to be here, that’s all! As I was saying, one of the benefits of caging a Lion Cub this young is that he will never in fact learn how to speak! ELPHABA Oh no! OZIAN OFFICIAL That’s right! Gather around! ELPHABA Can you imagine a world where Animals are kept in cages and they never speak?! OZIAN OFFICIAL He does seem a bit agitated but that is easily remedied! ELPHABA What are we going to do?! FIYERO We? ELPHABA Well somebody as to do something!!! (ELPHABA becomes so distraught that she involuntarily casts a spell over the entire CLASS—except FIYERO.) FIYERO What’s happening? ELPHABA I don’t know! I got mad and then— FIYERO Don’t move. And don’t get mad at me. (FIYERO grabs the cage.) FIYERO Well? Are you coming? (The two head out to the forest, where they can set the Lion Club free.) ACT I, SCENE 9

ELPHABA Careful! Don’t shake him! FIYERO I’m not! ELPHABA We can’t just let him loose anywhere you know! We’ve got to find someplace safe! FIYERO I realize that too! You think I’m really stupid don’t you? ELPHABA No, not really stupid. FIYERO Why is it that every time I see you you’re causing some sort of commotion? ELPHABA I don’t cause commotions, I am one! FIYERO That’s for sure. ELPHABA So you think I should just keep my mouth shut, is that what you’re saying?! FIYERO No! What I’m saying— ELPHABA Do you think I want to be this way? Do you think I want to care this much? FIYERO Look, all I meant was— ELPHABA Do you think I don’t know how easier my life would be if I didn’t? FIYERO Do you ever let anybody else talk? ELPHABA Oh, sorry. But can I say one more thing? You could have walked away back there. FIYERO So?

ELPHABA So no matter how shallow and self-absorbed you pretend to be— FIYERO Excuse me, there’s no pretense here: I happen to be genuinely self-absorbed and deeply shallow. ELPHABA No you’re not. Or you wouldn’t be so unhappy. FIYERO Fine if you don’t want my help— ELPHABA No, I do! His heart is pounding. I didn’t mean to frighten him. FIYERO What did you mean to do? And why was I the only one you didn’t do it to? ELPHABA You’re bleeding. FIYERO I am? ELPHABA It must have scratched you. FIYERO Yeah. Or maybe it scratched me or something. I better get to safety. I mean the cub! ELPHABA Of course! FIYERO Get the cub to safety. (FIYERO leaves.) ELPHABA Fiyero! (ELPHABA realizes that she could love FIYERO, yet she feels more alone than ever.) ELPHABA HANDS TOUCH, EYES MEET SUDDEN SILENCE, SUDDEN HEAT HEARTS LEAP IN A GIDDY WHIRL HE COULD BE THAT BOY I’M NOT THAT GIRL

DON’T DREAM TOO FAR DON’T LOSE SIGHT OF WHO YOU ARE DON’T REMEMBER THAT RUSH OF JOY HE COULD BE THAT BOY I’M NOT THAT GIRL EV’RY SO OFTEN WE LONG TO STEAL TO THE LAND OF WHAT-MIGHT-HAVE-BEEN BUT THAT DOESN’T SOFTEN THE ACHE WE FEEL WHEN REALITY SETS BACK IN BLITHE SMILE, LITHE LIMB SHE WHO’S WINSOME, SHE WINS HIM GOLD HAIR WITH A GENTLE CURL THAT’S THE GIRL HE CHOSE AND HEAVEN KNOWS I’M NOT THAT GIRL… DON’T WISH, DON’T START WISHING ONLY WOUNDS THE HEART I WASN’T BORN FOR THE ROSE AND PEARL THERE’S A GIRL I KNOW HE LOVES HER SO I’M NOT THAT GIRL… (MADAME MORRIBLE comes upon ELPHABA, taking shelter from the rain, and approaches her excitedly.) MORRIBLE Miss Elphaba! There you are! ELPHABA Madame Morrible! MORRIBLE Oh, I have thrillifying news! I’ve finally heard back from the Wizard, and my dear—he wishes to meet you! ELPHABA He asked for me?! Personally?! MORRIBLE Yes! I know how devastrated you were the other day for our poor Doctor Dillamond but you see my dear, one door closes and another opens! ELPHABA I don’t know what to say! Madame, how can I ever thank you?

MORRIBLE Careful my dear, you mustn’t get wet. Wait, I know. (She makes a sudden dramatic gesture, and the rain instantly stops.) MORRIBLE Oh, didn’t I ever mention? Weather is my specialty. Oz speed, my dear. (Sings) NOW YOU’RE OFF TO MEET THE WIZARD MAKE ME PROUD! ELPHABA I will—I’ll try… (Sings) AND THERE WE’LL FINALLY BE: THE WIZARD AND I… ACT I, SCENE 10 (GALINDA has accompanied ELPHABA to the train station to bid her goodbye.) CONDUCTOR All aboard! NESSAROSE Elphaba, I am so proud of you! I know father will be too. We’re all proud aren’t we? ELPHABA Will you be alright without me? GALINDA She’ll be fine. Bick will keep her company. Won’t you, Bick? BOQ It’s Boq! I can’t do this anymore! (BOQ runs out) NESSAROSE Boq! GALINDA Nessa, maybe he just isn’t the right one for you. NESSAROSE No! He’s the one. It’s me that’s not right. Don’t worry about me, Elphaba, I’ll be fine. Safe journey. (NESSAROSE wheels after BOQ)

ELPHABA Nessa! Wait! GALINDA Elphie, let her go. She’ll have to manage without you. We all will. (All at once, GALINDA breaks into tears.) ELPHABA You’ll barely notice I’m gone. You have Fiyero. Where is he anyway? Not that I expected him to say goodbye to me. I mean, we barely know each other. GALINDA I don’t know him either. Not anymore. He’s distant and moodified. And he’s been thinking which really worries me. It all started the day Doctor Dillamond got fired. I never knew he cared so much about that old Goat. Oh, look there he is! He did come! Fiyero! Over here, dearest! FIYERO Elphaba, I’m happy for you. GALINDA Yes, we are both so happy for you! FIYERO I’ve been thinking— ELPHABA Yes, I’ve heard. FIYERO About the Lion Cub and everything. I think about that day a lot. ELPHABA So do I. GALINDA Me too! I think about it constantly! Poor Doctor Dillamond! It makes one want to take a stand! In fact, I’ve been thinking about… about… changing my name! FIYERO Your name? GALINDA Why yes! Since Doctor Dillamond had his own way of pronouncing my name, in solidarity and to express my…um… outrage I will henceforward no longer be known as Galinda but as simply Glinda! FIYERO That’s very admirable of you, Glinda.

GLINDA Fiyero… FIYERO Elphaba, good luck. (He exits.)

ACT I, SCENE 11 GLINDA Well, there! You see?! ELPHABA Oh, don’t cry, Galinda! GLINDA It’s Glinda now! Stupid idea, I don’t even know what made me say it! ELPHABA It doesn’t matter what your name is, everyone loves you. GLINDA I don’t care! I want him! I don’t even think he’s perfect anymore and I still want him! This must be what other people feel like. How do they bear it?! ELPHABA Come with me. GLINDA Where? ELPHABA To the Emerald City. GLINDA Really? TOURISTS ONE SHORT DAY IN THE EMERALD CITY GLINDA I’ve always wanted to see the Emerald City. TOURISTS ONE SHORT DAY

IN THE EMERALD CITY… ACT I, SCENE 12 (The Emerald City) TOURISTS ONE SHORT DAY IN THE EMERALD CITY ONE SHORT DAY FULL OF SO MUCH TO DO EV’RY WAY THAT YOU LOOK IN THIS CITY THERE’S SOMETHING EXQUISITE YOU’LL WANT TO VISIT BEFORE THE DAY’S THROUGH! ELPHABA THERE ARE BUILDINGS TALL AS QUOXWOOD TREES GLINDA DRESS SALONS ELPHABA AND LIBRARIES GLINDA PALACES! ELPHABA MUSEUMS! BOTH A HUNDRED STRONG… THERE ARE WONDERS LIKE I’VE NEVER SEEN GLINDA IT’S ALL GRAND ELPHABA AND IT’S ALL GREEN BOTH I THINK WE’VE FOUND THE PLACE WHERE WE BELONG! I WANNA BE IN THIS HOI POLLOI ELPHABA SO I’LL BE BACK FOR GOOD SOMEDAY

GLINDA TO MAKE MY LIFE AND MAKE MY WAY… BOTH BUT FOR TODAY, WE’LL WANDER AND ENJOY… ALL ONE SHORT DAY IN THE EMERALD CITY ONE SHORT DAY TO HAVE A LIFETIME OF FUN ONE SHORT DAY… ELPHABA & GLINDA AND WE’RE WARNING THE CITY: NOW THAT WE’RE IN HERE YOU’LL KNOW WE’VE BEEN HERE ALL BEFORE WE ARE DONE! (They are in front of a Broadway-style marquee that reads Wiz-o-mania. TOURISTS pour into the theatre. GLINDA takes in the scene, enthralled.) GLINDA The night-life! The hustle and bustle! It’s all so… ozmopolitan! Elphie, come on—we’ll be late for Wizomania! ELPHABA I want to remember this moment. Always. Nobody’s staring. Nobody’s pointing. For the first time, I’m somewhere… where I belong. GLINDA You look positively—emerald! (They take each other’s hands and run into the theatre.) WIZOMANIA CHORUS WHO’S THE MAGE WHOSE MAJOR ITINERARY IS MAKNG ALL OZ MERRIER? WHO’S THE SAGE WHO SAGELY SAILED IN TO SAVE OUR POSTERIORS? WHOSE ENTHUSE FOR HOT AIR BALLOONING HAS ALL OF OZ HONEYMOONING? WOO-OO-OO…

WIZ-N’T HE WONDERFUL? (OUR WONDERFUL WIZARD!) AUDIENCE ONE SHORT DAY IN THE EMERALD CITY ONE SHORT DAY TO HAVE A LIFETIME OF FUN

WIZOMANIA CHORUS WHO’S THE MAGE WHOSE MAJOR ITINERARY IS MAKING ALL OZ MERRIER WHO’S THE SAGE WHO SAGELY SAILED IN TO SAVE OUR POSTERIORS… ALL

WHAT A WAY TO BE SEEING THE CITY… ELPHABA & GLINDA WHERE SO MANY ROAM TO WE’LL CALL IT HOME TOO AND THEN, JUST LIKE NOW WE CAN SAY: WE’RE JUST TWO FRIENDS… ELPHABA TWO GOOD FRIENDS… GLINDA TWO BEST FRIENDS… ALL SHARING ONE WONDERFUL ONE SHORT… GUARD The Wizard will see you now! ALL DAY! ACT I, SCENE 13 (In the Wizard’s private chamber…) OZ HEAD I am Oz! GLINDA Elphie!

OZ HEAD I am Oz, the great and terrible! Who are you and why do you seek me?! GLINDA Say something! ELPHABA I am Elphaba Thropp, Your Terribleness! And this is my best friend— WIZARD’S VOICE Oh, is that you Elphaba? I didn’t realize! (ELPHABA and GLINDA come face to face with the WIZARD OF OZ.) WIZARD I hope I didn’t startle ya! It’s so hard to make out people’s faces when I’m back there. So, let’s see, which is which? Elphaba! A pleasure, Elphaba! And you must be… GLINDA Glinda, the Ga is silent. (ELPHABA is observing the Oz Head.) WIZARD I know, it’s a bit much isn’t it? But people expect this sort of thing and you have to give people what they want. ELPHABA I’m so happy to meet you. WIZARD Well, that’s good—cuz that’s what I love best—making people happy. (Sings) I AM A SENTIMENTAL MAN WHO ALWAYS LONGED TO BE A FATHER THAT’S WHY I DO THE BEST I CAN TO TREAT EACH CITIZEN OF OZ AS SON— OR DAUGHTER… SO ELPHABA, I’D LIKE TO RAISE YOU HIGH ‘CUZ I THINK EV’RYONE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO FLY AND HELPING YOU WITH YOUR ASCENT AL— LOWS ME TO FEEL SO PARENTAL FOR I AM A SENTIMENTAL MAN… ELPHABA Oh Your Ozness, I knew you would help! You see, we’re here not just for ourselves.

GLINDA We’re not? ELPHABA No! We are here because something bad is happening to the Animals— WIZARD Please! I’m the Wizard of Oz! I already know why you’ve come. ELPHABA & GLINDA Oooooh! WIZARD I fully intend of granting your request. Of course, you must prove yourself first. GLINDA Of course! Prove yourself! Prove yourself! ELPHABA But how? WIZARD Madame, the book! MORRIBLE Right away, Your Ozness! (To the GIRLS’ amazement, MADAME MORRIBLE appears.) GLINDA Madame Morrible?! WIZARD I believe you’re acquainted with my new press secretary. ELPHABA Press secretary?! MORRIBLE Yes dearies, I have risen up in the world! You will find that the Wizard is a very generous man! If you do something for him he will do much for you! ELPHABA But what would you like me to do? WIZARD This is my monkey servant, Chistery. He watches the birds so longingly every morning.

MORRIBLE So his Ozness was thinking perhaps a levitation spell. (She holds an ancient looking book out to ELPHABA.) GLINDA I don’t believe it. Is that… The Grimmerie!? MORRIBLE Yes. The Ancient Book of Thaumaturgy and Enchantments. GLINDA Can I touch it? MORRIBLE No. ELPHABA What funny writing. MORRIBLE It’s a lost language—the lost language of spells. WIZARD A kind of recipe book, for change. MORRIBLE Don’t be discouraged if you cannot decipherate it, dearie. I myself can only read a spell or two and that took years and years of constant study— ELPHABA Ahben Tahkay… MORRIBLE Merciful Oz!

ELPHABA Ahben Tahkay…

WIZARD Oh, Chistery! What an experience you’re about to have! (Sings) SINCE ONCE I HAD MY OWN DAY IN THE SKY

ELPHABA Ahben Atum Ahben

Takayah Entayah Ah Entayah Tifentah I SAY EVERYONE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO FLY! Ahben Tahkay Ah (CHISTERY starts twitching, in pain.) ELPHABA

What is it? Is something wrong?

MORRIBLE It’s just the transition, dearie! ELPHABA Chistery, are you alright?! Why can’t he answer me?! (CHISTERY sprouts wings.) GLINDA You did it! You actually did it! ELPHABA He’s in pain! Quick, tell me how to reverse it! MORRIBLE You can’t! ELPHABA What?! MORRIBLE You can’t reverse a spell! Spells are irreversible! I knew it! I knew she had the power! I told you! ELPHABA You planned all this? MORRIBLE For you too, dearie! You benefit too! WIZARD And this is only the beginning! Look! (He pulls a lever to reveal his caged pet monkeys now all have wings.) WIZARD If this is how you do on your first time out skies the limit! MORRIBLE Such wingspan! Won’t they make perfect spies? ELPHABA Spies? WIZARD You’re right, that’s a harsh words. What about… scouts! That’s what they’ll be really. They’ll fly around Oz, reporting any subversive Animal activity. ELPHABA So it’s you. You’re behind it all.

WIZARD Elphaba, when I first got here there was discord and discontent, and where I come from everyone knows that the best way to bring folks together is to give them a really good enemy. ELPHABA You can’t read this book at all, can you? That’s why you need an enemy and spies and cages! You have no real power! WIZARD Exactly. And that’s why I need you. Don’t you see? The world’s your oyster now! You have so many opportunities ahead of you! You both do! GLINDA Oh thank you, Your Ozness! WIZARD THE TWO OF YOU IT’S TIME I RAISED YOU HIGH YES! THE TIME HAD COME FOR YOU TO HAVE THE CHANCE TO— ELPHABA No!!! (ELPHABA grabs The Grimmerie and runs from the room.) MORRIBLE Elphaba! GLINDA Elphie, wait! I’m sorry, Your Oznees. I’ll get her back. Elphie! (GLINDA goes after her.) WIZARD We’ve got to get her back! She’s knows too much! MORRIBLE Don’t worry, Your Ozness! I’ll handle it! (MADAME MORRIBLE leaves.) OZ HEAD Guards! Guards! (The PALACE GUARDS enter.)

OZ HEAD There’s a fugitive at large in the palace! Find her! Capture her! Bring her to me! GUARDS Yes, Your Ozness! (They march out.) ACT I, SCENE 14 (The girls have fled to the up-most turret of the Wizard’s Palace.) GLINDA Elphie, wait! Where are you going?! ELPHABA Oh no! There are no more stairs! GLINDA Elphaba, listen to me! ELPHABA The guards are coming up! We have to barricade the door! GLINDA What?! ELPHABA I’ll use this! (ELPHABA blockades the door shut with an old broom.) GLINDA Why couldn’t you have just stayed calm, for once! Instead of flying off the handle! (Sings) I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY NOW I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY HOW YOU HURT YOUR CAUSE FOREVER I HOPE YOU THINK YOU’RE CLEVER ELPHABA I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY TOO I HOPE YOU’RE PROUD HOW YOU WOULD GROVEL IN SUBMISSION TO FEED YOUR OWN AMBITION BOTH

SO THOUGH I CAN’T IMAGINE HOW I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY RIGHT NOW… MORRIBLE’S VOICE Citizens of Oz, there is an enemy who must be found and captured! Believe nothing she says, she is evil! Responsible for the mutilation of these poor, innocent monkeys! GLINDA Oh no. MORRIBLE’S VOICE Her green skin is but an outward manifestorium of her twisted nature! This distortion! This repulsion!! This Wicked Witch!!! GLINDA Don’t be afraid. ELPHABA I’m not. It’s the Wizard who should be afraid… of me! GLINDA Elphie, listen to me. Just say you’re sorry. Before it’s too late… (Sings) YOU CAN STILL BE WITH THE WIZARD WHAT YOU’VE WORKED AND WAITED FOR YOU CAN HAVE ALL YOU’VE EVER WANTED… ELPHABA I know— (Sings) BUT I DON’T WANT I— NO—I CAN’T WANT IT ANYMORE… SOMETHING HAS CHANGED WITHIN ME SOMETHING IS NOT THE SAME I’M THROUGH WITH PLAYIING BY THE RULES OF SOMEONE ELSE’S GAME TOO LATE FOR SECOND GUESSING TOO LATE TO GO BACK TO SLEEP IT’S TIME TO TRUST MY INSTINCTS CLOSE MY EYES AND LEAP IT’S TIME TO TRY DEFYING GRAVITY I THINK I’LL TRY DEFYING GRAVITY AND YOU CAN’T PULL ME DOWN…

GLINDA CAN’T I MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND, YOU’RE HAVING DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR…? ELPHABA I’M THROUGH ACCEPTING LIMITS ‘CAUSE SOMEONE SAYS THEY’RE SO SOME THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE BUT TIL I TRY, I’LL NEVER KNOW TOO LONG I’VE BEEN AFRAID OF LOSING LOVE I GUESS I’VE LOST WELL, IF THAT’S LOVE IT COMES AT MUCH TOO HIGH A COST I’D SOONER BUY DEFYING GRAVITY KISS ME GOODBYE I’M DEFYING GRAVITY AND YOU CAN’T PULL ME DOWN… GUARDS’ VOICE Open this door! In the name of His Supreme Ozness! GLINDA What are you doing?! That’s what started all of this in the first place! That hideous levitation spell! Stop!!!

ELPHABA Ah May Ah Tay Ah Tum Ditum

GLINDA Well? Where are your wings? Maybe you’re not as powerful as you think you are. (The old broom levitates over to ELPHABA.) GLINDA Sweet Oz! ELPHABA I told you, Glinda! Didn’t I tell you! GUARDS’ VOICE Bash it in! Fetch the battering ramikin! ELPHABA Quick get on! GLINDA What?!

ELPHABA Come with me. Think of what we can do… together. (Sings) UNLIMITED TOGETHER WE’RE UNLIMITED TOGETHER WE’LL BE THE GREATEST TEAM THERE’S EVER BEEN GLINDA— DREAMS THE WAY WE PLANNED ‘EM… GLINDA IF WE WORK IN TANDEM… BOTH THERE’S NO FIGHT WE CANNOT WIN JUST YOU AND I DEFYIING GRAVITY WITH YOU AND I DEFYING GRAVITY ELPHABA THEY’LL NEVER BRING US DOWN… (speaks) Well? Are you coming? (The answer is no, but GLINDA can’t bring herself to say it. Instead, she gets an old blanket from a shelf and wraps it around ELPHABA’S shoulders.) GLINDA Elphie, you’re trembling. Here… put this around you. (Sings) I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY NOW THAT YOU’RE CHOOSING THIS… ELPHABA YOU TOO— I HOPE IT BRINGS YOU BLISS BOTH I REALLY HOPE YOU GET IT AND YOU DON’T LIVE TO REGRET IT I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY IN THE END I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY, MY FRIEND… (The PALACE GUARDS burst in, their muskets drawn.) GUARD There she is! Don’t let her get away!

GLINDA Leave me alone, you hear! Let go of me! ELPHABA It’s not her! She has nothing to do with it! I’m the one you want! It’s me! GLINDA Elphie! ELPHABA It’s meee! (ELPHABA rides her enchanted broom skyward.) ELPHABA SO IF YOU CARE TO FIND ME LOOK TO THE WESTERN SKY AS SOMEONE TOLD ME LATELY: “EV’RYONE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO FLY” AND IF I’M FLYING SOLO AT LEAST I’M FLYING FREE TO THOSE WHO’D GROUND ME TAKE A MESSAGE BACK FROM ME: TELL THEM HOW I AM DEFYING GRAVITY I’M FLYING HIGH DEFYING GRAVITY AND SOON I’LL MATCH THEM IN RENOWN AND NOBODY IN ALL OF OZ NO WIZARD THAT THERE IS OR WAS IS EVER GONNA BRING ME DOWN! GLINDA I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY! CITIZENS OF OZ LOOK AT HER, SHE’S WICKED! GET HER! ELPHABA BRING ME DOWN! CITIZENS OF OZ NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED SO WE’VE GOT TO BRING HER… ELPHABA AHHHH!

CITIZENS OF OZ DOWN! END ACT I

ACT II, SCENE 1 (Time has passed, and the Land of Oz is filled with fear.) CITIZENS OF OZ EV’RY DAY, MORE WICKED! EV’RY DAY, THE TERROR GROWS! ALL OF OZ IS EVER ON ALERT! THAT’S THE WAY WITH WICKED— SPREADING FEAR WHERE E’ER SHE GOES SEEKING OUT NEW VICTIMS SHE CAN HURT! A HYSTERICAL WOMAN LIKE SOME TERRIBLE GREEN BLIZZARD THROUGHOUT THE LAND SHE FLIES… AN OUTRAGED MAN DEFAMING OUR POOR WIZARD WITH HER CALUMNIES AND LIES! ALL SHE LIES! SAVE US FROM THE WICKED! SHIELD US SO WE WON’T BE HEXED! GIVE US WARNING: WHERE WILL SHE STRIKE NEXT? WHERE WILL SHE STRIKE NEXT? WHERE WILL SHE STRIKE— NEXT!? (Outside the Wizard’s palace, MADAME MORRIBLE and FIYERO look on as a well-turned-out GLINDA addresses an adoring CROWD.) GLINDA Fellow Ozians—as terrifying as terror is, let us put aside our panic for this one day… and celebrate! (Sings) OH WHAT A CELEBRATION WE’LL HAVE TODAY CROWD THANK GOODNESS!

GLINDA LET’S HAVE A CELEBRATION THE GLINDA WAY… CROWD THANK GOODNESS! MORRIBLE FIN’LLY A DAY THAT'S TOTALLY WICKED-WITCH-FREE! CROWD WE COULDN’T BE HAPPIER THANK GOODNESS! (MADAME MORRIBLE turns to GLINDA and FIYERO, who’s been named the new Captain of the Guard.) MORRIBLE And thank goodness for you, Glinda! And for your handsome swan, our new Captain of the Guard! You’ve been the forefront of the hunt for the Wicked Witch, haven’t you Captain? FIYERO Actually, I don’t think of her as a Wicked Witch— MORRIBLE So Captain, how does it feel? FIYERO Frustrating, but I became the Captain of the Guard to find her and I will not rest— MORRIBLE No, being engaged! CROWD Congratulotions! FIYERO This is an engagement party? GLINDA Surprised? FIYERO Yes! GLINDA Oh, good! We hoped you’d be—the Wizard and I!

(Sings) WE COULDN’T BE HAPPIER RIGHT, DEAR? COULDN’T BE HAPPIER RIGHT HERE, LOOK WHAT WE’VE GOT: A FAIRY-TALE PLOT OUR VERY OWN HAPPY ENDING WHERE WE COULDN’T BE HAPPIER TRUE, DEAR? COULDN’T BE HAPPIER AND WE’RE HAPPY TO SHARE OUR ENDING VICARIOUSLY WITH ALL OF YOU HE COULDN’T LOOK HANDSOMER I COULDN’T FEEL HUMBLER WE COULDN’T BE HAPPIER BECAUSE HAPPY IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ALL YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE! MORRIBLE And Glinda dear, we are happy for you! As Press Secretary, I’ve striven to ensure that all of Oz knows the story of your braverism! How vividly I remember… (Sings) THE DAY YOU WERE FIRST SUMMONED TO AN AUDIENCE WITH OZ AND ALTHOUGH HE WOULD NOT TELL YOU WHY INITIALLY WHEN YOU BOWED BEFORE HIS THRONE HE DECREED YOU’D HENCE BE KNOWN AS GLINDA THE GOOD—OFFICIALLY! FIYERO That’s not how you described it to me! GLINDA Well, no, not exactly, but we’ll talk about that later. MORRIBLE THEN WITH A JEALOUS SQUEAL THE WICKED WITCH BURST FROM CONCEALMENT WHERE SHE HAD BEEN LURKING—SURREPTITIALLY! SOMEONE IN THE CROWD I HEAR SHE HAS AN EXTRA EYE THAT ALWAYS REMAINS AWAKE! ANOTHER PERSON I HEAR THAT SHE CAN SHED HER SKIN AS EASILY AS A SNAKE!

A THIRD PERSON I HEAR SOME REBEL ANIMALS ARE GIVING HER FOOD AND SHELTER A FOURTH PERSON I HEAR HER SOUL IS SO UNCLEAN PURE WATER CAN MELT HER! FIYERO WHAT!? CROWD MELT HER!? PLEASE—SOMEBODY GO AND MELT HER! FIYERO Do you hear that? Water will melt her!? GLINDA Shhh! Dearest! FIYERO People are so empty-headed, they’ll believe anything! GLINDA Excuse us just a tick tock. FIYERO I can’t just stand her grinning, pretending to go along with all this! GLINDA Fiyero, do you think I like hearing them say all those awful things about her? I hate it! FIYERO Then what are we doing here? Let’s go. Let’s get out of here. GLINDA I can’t! I can’t leave now. Not when people are looking to me to raise their spirits. FIYERO No, you can’t leave because you can’t resist this! And that’s the truth! GLINDA Well maybe I can’t. Is that so wrong? Who could? FIYERO You know who could! And who has!

GLINDA Fiyero, I miss her too. But we can’t just stop living. No one has searched harder for her than you. Don’t you see? She doesn’t want to be found. We’ve got to face it. FIYERO You’re right. You’re right. And look, if it makes you happy, of course I’ll marry you. GLINDA But it’ll make you happy too, right? FIYERO You know me, I’m always happy. (FIYERO leaves) GLINDA Fiyero—! Oh—yes, thanks plenty, dearest! He’s gone to fetch me a refreshment. He’s so thoughtful that way! (Sings) THAT’S WHY I COULDN’T BE HAPPIER NO, I COULDN’T BE HAPPIER THOUGH IT IS, I ADMIT THE TINIEST BIT UNLIKE I ANTICIPATED BUT I COULDN’T BE HAPPIER SIMPLY COULDN’T BE HAPPIER WELL—NOT “SIMPLY”… ‘CAUSE GETTING YOUR DREAMS IT’S STRANGE, BUT IT SEEMS A LITTLE—WELL—COMPLICATED THERE’S A KIND OF A SORT OF… COST THERE’S A COUPLE OF THINGS GET… LOST THERE ARE BRIDGES YOU CROSS YOU DIDN’T KNOW YOU’D CROSSED UNTIL YOU’VE CROSSED… AND IF THAT JOY, THAT THRILL DOESN’T THRILL LIKE YOU THINK IT WILL STILL— WITH THIS PERFECT FINALE THE CHEERS AND THE BALLYHOO WHO WOULDN’T BE HAPPIER? SO I COULDN’T BE HAPPIER BECAUSE HAPPY IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ALL YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE WELL, ISN’T IT? HAPPY IS WHAT HAPPENS… WHEN YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE...

CROWD WE LOVE YOU GLINDA, IF WE MAY BE SO FRANK… GLINDA THANK GOODNESS! CROWD FOR ALL THIS JOY, WE KNOW WHO WE’VE GOT TO THANK: THANK GOODNESS! MEN THAT MEANS, THE WIZARD… WOMEN GLINDA… GLINDA AND FIANCÉ! CROWD THEY COULDN’T BE GOODLIER SHE COULDN’T BE LOVELIER WE COULDN’T BE LUCKIER… GLINDA I COULDN’T BE HAPPIER… CROWD THANK GOODNESS… GLINDA AND CROWD TODAY! THANK GOODNESS FOR TODAY! ACT II, SCENE 2 (In the Governor’s Mansion in Munchkinland, a uniformed BOQ brings NESSAROSE a cup of tea. He has become her servant.) BOQ Will there be anything else, Madame? NESSAROSE I’ve asked you to call me Nessarose, remember? BOQ Yes, Madame.

(BOQ hurries off, leaving NESSA alone and frustrated.) NESSAROSE Boq! ELPHABA’S VOICE Well it seems the beautiful get more beautiful. (All at once, ELPHABA appears.) ELPHABA While the green just get greener. I’m sorry did I scare you? I seem to have that affect on people. It’s good to see you. NESSAROSE What are you doing here? ELPHABA Well, there’s no place like home. I never thought I’d hear myself say this, but I need Father’s help. I need him to stand with me. NESSAROSE That’s impossible. ELPHABA No, it’s not. Not if you ask him. He’ll do it for you, Nessa. You know he will. NESSAROSE Father’s dead! ELPHABA What? NESSAROSE He’s dead, I’m the Governor now. Well, what did you expect? After he learned what you'd done! How you disgraced us! He died of shame! Embarrassed to death! ELPHABA Good. I’m glad. It’s better. NESSAROSE That’s a wicked thing to say! ELPHABA No, it’s true! Because now it’s just us. You can help me and together— NESSAROSE Oh, Elphaba, shut up! First of all, I can’t harbor a fugitive, I’m an unelected official! And why should I help you? You fly around Oz, trying to rescue Animals you’ve never even met—and not once have you

ever thought to use your powers to rescue me. (Sings) ALL OF MY LIFE, I DEPENDED ON YOU HOW DO YOU THINK THAT FEELS? ALL OF MY LIFE, I’VE DEPENDED ON YOU AND THIS HIDEOUS CHAIR WITH WHEELS SCROUNGING FOR SCRAPS OF PITY TO PICK UP AND LONGING TO KICK UP MY HEELS… ELPHABA Nessa, there isn’t a spell for everything. The power is mysterious. It’s not like cobbling up a pair of… Wait— (She swiftly pulls The Grimmerie from her satchel and finds a spell.) ELPHABA Ambulahn Dare Pahto Pahpoot Ambulahn Dasca Caldapess Lahfenahto Lahfenahtum Pede Pede Caldapess

NESSAROSE What are you doing— What does that mean? Oh!

Ambulahn Dare Pahto Pahpoot Lahfenahto Lahfenahtum Pede Pede Caldapess

Oh—my shoes! It feels like they’re on fire! What have you done to my shoes!?

(And NESSAROSE’S shoes begin to glow like fiery jewels. All at once, she miraculously stands up from her wheelchair.) NESSAROSE No don’t help me. ELPHABA OH, NESSA, AT LAST I’VE DONE WHAT LONG AGO I SHOULD AND FINALLY FROM THESE POWERS, SOMETHING GOOD FINALLY, SOMETHING GOOD! NESSAROSE Boq! Boq, come quickly! ELPHABA Boq? NESSAROSE Boq, come here at once!

ELPHABA Nessa, wait! No one can know that I’m here! (BOQ walks in.) BOQ What is it, Madame Governor? You! ELPHABA Boq! BOQ Stay back! ELPHABA Boq, it’s just me! I’m not going to hurt you! BOQ You’re lying! That’s all you ever do! You and your sister! She’s as wicked as you are! NESSAROSE Boq! ELPHABA What are you talking about? BOQ I’m talking about my life! The little that’s left of it! I’m not free to leave Munchkinland! None of us are! Ever sense she took power she’s been stripping the Munchkins of our rights! And we didn’t have that many to begin with! And do you know why?! NESSAROSE To keep you here with me! But none of that matters anymore! Look! BOQ You did this for her? NESSAROSE For both of us. BOQ Oh, Nessa, this changes everything! NESSAROSE I know! BOQ NESSA—

NESSAROSE YES? BOQ UH—NESSA SURELY NOW I’LL MATTER LESS TO YOU AND YOU WON’T MIND MY LEAVING HERE TONIGHT NESSAROSE Leaving? BOQ YES—THAT BALL THAT’S BEING STAGED ANNOUNCING GLINDA IS ENGAGED TO FIYERO… NESSAROSE Glinda. BOQ YES, NESSA—THAT’S RIGHT— AND I’VE GOT TO GO APPEAL TO HER EXPRESS THE WAY I FEEL TO HER— (speaks) Oh, Nessa—I lost my heart to Glinda the moment I first saw her, you know that. NESSAROSE LOST YOUR HEART? WELL—WE’LL SEE ABOUT THAT! ELPHABA Nessa—let him go— NESSAROSE DID YOU THINK I’D LET YOU LEAVE ME HERE FLAT!? BOQ Don’t come any closer! NESSAROSE YOU’RE GOING TO LOSE YOUR HEART TO ME, I TELL YOU IF I HAVE TO—I HAVE TO— MAGIC SPELL YOU! (NESSAROSE grabs the book of spells.) NESSAROSE Ah toom… Tah take… ? ELPHABA Nessa, stop! It’s dangerous!

BOQ What, what’s she doing? ELPHABA You’re pronouncing the words all wrong! BOQ I’m warning you don’t try to stop me! NESSAROSE Ah toom core tum! BOQ Oh! NESSAROSE Boq, what is it? BOQ My heart—it feels like it’s shrinking! (NESSA’S spell takes hold of BOQ and he collapses.) NESSAROSE Elphaba! Do something! ELPHABA I can’t! You can’t reverse a spell once it’s been cast! NESSAROSE Then what will we do!? This is all your fault! If you hadn’t shown me that horrendible book— ELPHABA Hush will you! I’ve got to find another spell, it’s the only thing that might work. NESSAROSE SAVE HIM—PLEASE JUST SAVE HIM MY POOR BOQ, MY SWEET, MY BRAVE HIM DON’T LEAVE ME TILL MY SORRY LIFE HAS CEASED… NESSAROSE ALONE AND LOVELESS HERE WITH JUST THE GIRL IN THE MIRROR JUST HER AND ME— THE WICKED WITCH OF THE EAST! WE DESERVE EACH OTHER…

ELPHABA Vivahlos Vivahlos Meno Non Cordo Meno Vivahlos Vivahlos Meno Non Cordo

ELPHABA He’s asleep. NESSAROSE What about his heart? ELPHABA It’s alright… he won’t need one now. I have to go to the Emerald City. What happened to those monkeys was my fault. I’ve got to set them free. NESSAROSE You’re not going back there to save some monkeys, you’re going to find Fiyero, but it’s too late! Elphaba, please don’t leave me! ELPHABA Nessa, I’ve done everything I could for you and it hasn’t been enough. And nothing ever will be. (ELPHABA leaves.) NESSAROSE Elphaba! Wait! Elphaba! BOQ’S VOICE Where am I? What happened? NESSAROSE Nothing, you just fell asleep. THE TIN WOODMAN What is it? What’s wrong? NESSAROSE It wasn’t me! It was her! I tried to stop her! (“BOQ” see’s that he is now made of tin. He runs out screaming.) NESSAROSE No, I still… It was Elphaba, Boq! It was Elphaba!!! ACT II, SCENE 3 (Inside the Wizard’s chambers, ELPHABA searches for the lever to the Monkey Cage. Suddenly—the WIZARD appears.) OZ HEAD VOICE I knew you’d you be back! WIZARD Just hear me out! I don’t wanna harm you!

ELPHABA You have harmed me! WIZARD I know that! And I regret it. Elphaba— ELPHABA Stay where you are! I’m setting those Monkeys free and if you try to interfere or call you guards— WIZARD I’m not going to call anyone! Truth is, I’m glad to see you again. Gets pretty lonely for me around here. I know you must get lonely too. ELPHABA You don’t know the first thing about me! WIZARD Oh but I do. I know the real reason you came back here. It’s the why everyone comes to see the Wizard. So I can grant their heart’s desire. ELPHABA I don’t want anything from you! WIZARD Sure you do! You want to stop fighting, stop running. Elphaba, you’ve been so strong through all this. Aren’t you tired of being the strong one? Wouldn’t you like someone to take care of you? Please, can’t we start again? ELPHABA Don’t you think I wish I could? I’d give anything to turn back the clocks, go back to that time when I actually believed that you were wonderful! The Wonderful Wizard of Oz! No one believed in you more than I did. WIZARD Elphaba, try to understand, I never had a family of my own—I was always travelin’. So I guess I just wanted to give the citizens of Oz everything. ELPHABA So you lied to them. WIZARD Only verbally. Besides, they were the lies they wanted to hear! (sings) I NEVER ASKED FOR THIS OR PLANNED IT IN ADVANCE I WAS MERELY BLOWN HERE BY THE WINDS OF CHANCE I NEVER SAW MYSELF

AS A SOLOMON OR SOCRATES I KNEW WHO I WAS: ONE OF YOUR DIME-A-DOZEN MEDIOCRITIES THEN SUDDENLY I’M HERE RESPECTED—WORSHIPPED EVEN JUST BECAUSE THE FOLKS IN OZ NEEDED SOMEONE TO BELIEVE IN DOES IT SURPRISE YOU I GOT HOOKED, AND ALL TOO SOON? WHAT CAN I SAY? I GOT CARRIED AWAY AND NOT JUST BY BALLOON… WONDERFUL THEY CALL ME “WONDERFUL” SO I SAID “WONDERFUL—IF YOU INSIST I WILL BE WONDERFUL” AND THEY SAID “WONDERFUL” BELIEVE ME, IT’S HARD TO RESIST ‘CAUSE IT FEELS WONDERFUL THEY THINK I’M WONDERFUL HEY LOOK WHO’S WONDERFUL THIS CORN-FED HICK WHO SAID: “IT MIGHT BE KEEN TO BUILD A TOWN OF GREEN AND A WONDERFUL ROAD OF YELLOW BRICK!” ELPHABA It’s all just smoke and mirrors and that’s the truth! WIZARD THE TRUTH IS NOT A THING OF FACT OR REASON THE TRUTH IS JUST WHAT EV’RYONE AGREES ON (speaks) Where I come from, we believe all sorts of things that aren’t true. We call it—“history.” (Sings) A MAN’S CALLED A “TRAITOR”—OR “LIBERATOR” A RICH MAN’S A “THIEF”—OR “PHILANTHROPIST” IS ONE A “CRUSADER”—OR “RUTHLESS INVADER?” IT’S ALL IN WHICH LABEL IS ABLE TO PERSIST THERE ARE PRECIOUS FEW AT EASE WITH MORAL AMBIGUITIES SO WE ACT AS THOUGH THEY DON’T EXIST THEY CALL ME “WONDERFUL” SO I AM WONDERFUL

IN FACT, IT’S SO MUCH WHO I AM IT’S PART OF MY NAME AND WITH MY HELP, YOU CAN BE THE SAME! AT LONG, LONG LAST RECEIVE YOUR DUE— LONG OVERDUE ELPHABA—THE MOST CELEBRATED ARE THE REHABILITATED THERE’LL BE SUCH A… WHOOP-DE-DOO A CELEBRATION THROUGHOUT OZ THAT’S ALL TO DO—WITH YOU… WONDERFUL THEY’LL CALL YOU WONDERFUL ELPHABA IT DOES SOUND WONDERFUL… WIZARD TRUST ME IT’S FUN… WHEN YOU ARE WONDERFUL ELPHABA I COULD BE WONDERFUL WIZARD YES! WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL— ELPHABA WAIT!—I’LL ACCEPT YOUR PROPOSITION… WIZARD Wonderful! ELPHABA ON ONE CONDITION— WIZARD Yes? ELPHABA YOU SET THOSE MONKEYS FREE… WIZARD Done! (He pulls the lever, the cage opens, and the winged Monkeys fly out of their prison.) ELPHABA Fly! You’re free! Fly, Monkeys! You’re free! Chistery, you’re free! Now Fly! Fly! You under the

blanket! WIZARD No! Wait! (It is her old friend DOCTOR DILLAMOND.) ELPHABA No. It can’t be. Doctor Dillamond? WIZARD Elphaba, we couldn’t let him continue speaking out. ELPHABA Doctor Dillamond, are you alright? Don’t be afraid. It’s me Elphaba. Doctor Dillamond, don’t you remember me? DILLAMOND Baaaaaa ELPHABA Can’t you speak? DILLAMOND Baaaaaaaa (She turns to the WIZARD, furious at him and at herself for ever having trusted him.) ELPHABA You and I have nothing in common. I’m nothing like you and I never will be. And I’ll fight you till the day I die! (And with this, the WIZARD immediately rushes behind his Giant Head.) OZ HEAD Guards! Guards! (Two GUARDS appear. ELPHABA backs away from them, brandishing her broom, when she stops short: One of the GUARDS is FIYERO.) FIYERO Are you alright, Your Ozness? ELPHABA Fiyero! Fiyero, thank Oz! FIYERO Silence, witch!

GUARD There’s a Goat on the lam, sir. FIYERO I know that. Just fetch me some water! GUARD Water, sir? FIYERO You heard me! As much as you can carry! GUARDS Yes sir! (They march out) ELPHABA Fiyero, not you too! FIYERO I said silence! (FIYERO pulls the WIZARD out from behind his Giant Head.) WIZARD No! FIYERO Don’t make a sound, Your Ozness! Unless you want all of your guests to know the truth about the Wonderful Wizard of Oz! Elphaba, I will find Dillamond later now get out of here! ELPHABA Fiyero, you frightened me. I thought you might have changed. FIYERO I have changed. (GLINDA has heard the commotion.) GLINDA What’s going on? I thought I heard… Elphie! Oh thank Oz you’re alive! (She rushes to embrace her long-lost friend.) GLINDA Oh but you shouldn’t have come! If anyone discoverates you—

FIYERO Glinda, you better go. GLINDA Fiyero, what are you doing? FIYERO Please just go back to the ball! GLINDA Your Ozness, he means no disrespectation. Please understand, we all went to school together. FIYERO Elphaba! GLINDA Fiyero, have you misplaced your mind?! What are you doing?! FIYERO I’m going with her. GLINDA What? ELPHABA What? GLINDA What are saying? That the two of you… all this time behind my back? ELPHABA No it wasn’t like that! FIYERO Well, it was. But it wasn’t. Let’s go. (FIYERO leaves with ELPHABA.) GLINDA Fine! Go! You deserve each other! WIZARD Here have a swig of this. Dulls the pain. GLINDA No thank you. (MORRIBLE rushes in.)

MORRIBLE Is it true? Is it true your betrothed has brought her into custody? WIZARD I’m afraid our new Captain of the Guard had other plans. MORRIBLE What? She’s not been captured? WIZARD Quite the opposite, considering how well she eluded us last time. MORRIBLE We must smoke her out! Force her to show herself! WIZARD But how? GLINDA Her sister. MORRIBLE What? What’d she say? GLINDA Use her sister. Spread a rumor. Make her think her sister’s in trouble. She will fly to her side and you will have her. WIZARD Exactly so. GLINDA And now if Your Ozness will excuse me I have a slight headache. I think I’ll go lie down. (GLINDA runs out.) MORRIBLE A rumor won’t do it. Elphaba’s too smart. WIZARD Far too smart. MORRIBLE Perhaps a change in the weather! (As MORRIBLE, a weather expert, cooks up a terrible storm, GLINDA wanders off, sad and alone.)

GLINDA DON’T WISH, DON’T START WISHING ONLY WOUNDS THE HEART… THERE’S A GIRL I KNOW HE LOVES HER SO I’M NOT THAT GIRL… ACT II, SCENE 4 (By a campfire in the Great Gillikin Forest, ELPHABA and FIYERO are alone at last…) ELPHABA KISS ME TOO FIERCELY HOLD ME TOO TIGHT I NEED HELP BELIEVING YOU’RE WITH ME TONIGHT MY WILDEST DREAMINGS COULD NOT FORESEE LYING BESIDE YOU WITH YOU WANTING ME JUST FOR THIS MOMENT AS LONG AS YOU’RE MINE I’VE LOST ALL RESISTANCE AND CROSSED SOME BORDERLINE AND IF IT TURNS OUT IT’S OVER TOO FAST I’LL MAKE EV’RY LAST MOMENT LAST AS LONG AS YOU’RE MINE… FIYERO MAYBE I’M BRAINLESS MAYBE I’M WISE BUT YOU’VE GOT ME SEEING THROUGH DIFFERENT EYES SOMEHOW I’VE FALLEN UNDER YOUR SPELL AND SOMEHOW I’M FEELING IT’S “UP” THAT I FELL… BOTH EVERY MOMENT AS LONG AS YOU’RE MINE I’LL WAKE UP MY BODY AND MAKE UP FOR LOST TIME… FIYERO SAY THERE’S NO FUTURE FOR US AS A PAIR…

BOTH AND THOUGH I MAY KNOW I DON’T CARE… JUST FOR THIS MOMENT AS LONG AS YOU’RE MINE COME BE HOW YOU WANT TO AND SEE HOW BRIGHT WE SHINE BORROW THE MOONLIGHT UNTIL IT IS THROUGH AND KNOW I’LL BE HERE HOLDING YOU AS LONG AS YOU’RE MINE… (FIYERO studies her face.) FIYERO What? What is it? ELPHABA It’s just, for the first time—I feel wicked. I just wish… FIYERO What? ELPHABA I wish I could be beautiful for you. FIYERO Elphaba— ELPHABA Don’t tell me that I am. You don’t have to lie to me. FIYERO It’s not lying, it’s looking at things another way. You and Glinda will make up— (ELPHABA hears a strange sound…) ELPHABA Shhh. Listen. Do you hear that? Sounds like somebody in pain. FIYERO No it’s just the wind. ELPHABA My sister’s in danger. FIYERO Wait, how do you know?

ELPHABA I don’t know I just do. Oh! (She then points to the sky terrified.) FIYERO What is it? What’s wrong? ELPHABA Look there. Don’t you see it? FIYERO No. What do you see? ELPHABA It doesn’t make any sense. It’s a house. But it’s—flying through the sky! I have to go to Nessa! FIYERO Wait, I’ll come with you. ELPHABA No, you mustn’t! it’s too dangerous! FIYERO Listen, my family has a castle out west in Kiamo Ko. No one’s been there for centuries except those who watch over it. We have never lived in it. ELPHABA Where do you live? FIYERO The other castle. ELPHABA Oh, of course. FIYERO It’s the perfect hideout; secret passageways and tunnels. You’ll be safe there. ELPHABA We will see each other again, won’t we? FIYERO Elphaba, we’re gong to be together always. You can see houses flying through the sky, can’t you see that? (ELPHABA leaves, as FIYERO braces himself for the coming storm.)

ACT II, SCENE 5 (At the site of the crashed house in Munchkinland.) GLINDA That’s right, you just take that one road the whole time! I hope they don’t get lost, I am so bad at giving directions. Oh, Nessa… (ELPHABA and GLINDA confront each other. Both are equally devastated: ELPHABA for the loss of her sister, GLINDA for the loss of FIYERO.) ELPHABA What a touching display of grief. GLINDA I don’t believe we have anything further to say to one another. ELPHABA I wanted something to remember her by and all that was left of her were those shoes! And now that wretched little farm girl has walked off with them! So I would appreciate some time alone to say goodbye to my sister. Nessa… Nessa, please… Please forgive me… GLINDA Elphie, don’t blame yourself. It’s dreadful, it is to have a house fall on you, but accidents will happen. ELPHABA You call this an accident? GLINDA Yes! Well maybe not an accident… ELPHABA Then what would you call it? GLINDA A regime change. Caused by a bizarre and unexpected twister of fate. ELPHABA So you think cyclones just appear out of the blue? GLINDA Well I don’t know. I never— ELPHABA Of course you never! You’re too busy telling everyone how wonderful everything is! GLINDA Well I’m a public figure now and people expect me—

ELPHABA To lie? GLINDA To be encouraging! And just what exactly have you been doing besides riding around on that filthy old thing? ELPHABA Well we can’t all come and go by bubble! Whose invention was that? The Wizard’s? Of course even if it wasn’t, I’m sure he’d still take credit for it. GLINDA Yes well it seems a lot of us are taking things that don’t belong to us, aren’t we? ELPHABA Now wait just a clock tick! I know it’s difficult for that blissful blond brain of yours to comprehend that someone like him could actually choose someone like me! But it’s happened. It’s real. And you can wave that ridiculous wand all you want, you can’t change it! He never belonged to you! He doesn’t love you and he never did! He loves me! (GLINDA slaps ELPHABA, ELPHABA laughs.) ELPHABA Feel better now? GLINDA Yes I do. ELPHABA Good! (ELPHABA hits GLINDA.) ELPHABA So do I! GUARD Halt in the name of the Wizard! ELPHABA Let me go! GLINDA Let her go! I almost had her! GUARD Sorry it took us so long to get here, miss.

GLINDA What? What do you mean? ELPHABA I can’t believe you would sink this low! To use my sister’s death as a trap to capture me! GLINDA Elphie, I didn’t mean for this to happen! (FIYERO arrives to protect ELPHABA.) FIYERO Let the green girl go! ELPHABA Fiyero, how in Oz?! FIYERO Let her go! Or explain to all Oz how the Wizard’s guards watched while Glinda the Good was slain! GLINDA Fiyero, no… FIYERO I said let her go! Elphaba, go now! ELPHABA No! Not without you! GLINDA Fiyero— FIYERO Hush now! Go! GLINDA Do it! (ELPHABA runs out) GUARD Seize him! GLINDA No wait! What are you doing? In the name of goodness stop! Don’t you see? He was never going to harm me, he just… he loves her. FIYERO Glinda, I am so sorry.

GUARD Take him out to that field there! Put him on those polls until he tells us where the witch went! GLINDA Don’t you hurt him! Please! Don’t hurt him! Fiyero! (The GUARDS hang FIYERO in the field like a SCARECROW.) ACT II, SCENE 6 (At Kiamo Ko Castle…) ELPHABA Fiyero! (ELPHABA chants a frantic spell in a desperate attempt to save FIYERO’S life.) ELPHABA ELEKA NAHMEN NAHMEN AH TUM AH TUM ELEKA NAHMEN ELEKA NAHMEN NAHMEN AH TUM AH TUM ELEKA NAHMEN… LET HIS FLESH NOT BE TORN LET HIS BLOOD LEAVE NO STAIN THOUGH THEY BEAT HIM LET HIM FEEL NO PAIN LET HIS BONES NEVER BREAK AND HOWEVER THEY TRY TO DESTROY HIM LET HIM NEVER DIE LET HIM NEVER DIE ELEKA NAHMEN NAHMEN AH TUM AH TUM ELEKA NAHMEN ELEKA NAHMEN NAHMEN AH TUM AH TUM ELEKA… ELEKA… WHAT GOOD IS THIS CHANTING? I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT I’M READING I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT TRICK I OUGHT TO TRY FIYERO, WHERE ARE YOU? ALREADY DEAD OR BLEEDING? ONE MORE DISASTER I CAN ADD TO MY GENEROUS SUPPLY? NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED NO ACT OF CHARITY GOES UNRESENTED NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED THAT’S MY NEW CREED

MY ROAD OF GOOD INTENTIONS LED WHERE SUCH ROADS ALWAYS LEAD NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED… NESSA… DOCTOR DILLAMOND… FIYERO… FIYERO…!! ONE QUESTION HAUNTS AND HURTS TOO MUCH, TOO MUCH TO MENTION WAS I REALLY SEEKING GOOD OR JUST SEEKING ATTENTION? IS THAT ALL GOOD DEEDS ARE WHEN LOOKED AT WITH AN ICE-COLD EYE? IF THAT’S ALL GOOD DEEDS ARE MAYBE THAT’S THE REASON WHY… NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED ALL HELPFUL URGES SHOULD BE CIRCUMVENTED NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED SURE, I MEANT WELL— WELL, LOOK WHAT “WELL-MEANT” DID ALL RIGHT, ENOUGH—SO BE IT SO BE IT THEN LET ALL OZ BE AGREED: I’M WICKED THROUGH AND THROUGH SINCE I CANNOT SUCCEED FIYERO, SAVING YOU I PROMISE NO GOOD DEED WILL I ATTEMPT TO DO AGAIN EVER AGAIN NO GOOD DEED WILL I DO AGAIN! ACT II, SCENE 7 (Outside the Wizard’s Palace, an angry mob has gathered. MORRIBLE and GLINDA observe them.) OZIANS GO AND HUNT HER AND FIND HER AND KILL HER A VICIOUS WOMAN Good fortune witch hunters!

OZIANS GO AND HUNT HER AND FIND HER AND KILL HER RABID MAN Kill the witch! OZIANS WICKEDNESS MUST BE PUNISHED EVIL EFFECTIVELY ELIMINATED WICKEDNESS MUST BE PUNISHED KILL THE WITCH! (The TIN WOODMAN stands on a balcony above the crowd and addresses them fervently.) THE TIN WOODMAN And this is more than just a service to the Wizard. I have a personal score to settle with Elph—with the Witch! (Sings) IT’S DUE TO HER I’M MADE OF TIN HER SPELL MADE THIS OCCUR SO FOR ONCE I’M GLAD I’M HEARTLESS I’LL BE HEARTLESS KILLING HER! (speaks) And I’m not the only one! Come on! Pssst. Oh, come on you! Tell them what she did to you in class that day! How you were just a Cub and she Cub-napped you! THE COWARDLY LION Nooooo! THE TIN WOODMAN You see—? (Sings) THE LION ALSO HAS A GRIEVANCE TO REPAY IF SHE’D LET HIM FIGHT HIS OWN BATTLES WHEN HE WAS YOUNG HE WOULDN’T BE A COWARD TODAY! CROWD Kill her! Kill the Witch! GLINDA No—that’s not how it happened! Madame—we’ve got to stop this, it’s gone too far! MORRIBLE Oh, I think Elphaba can take care of herself.

GLINDA But Madame, something’s been troubling me, about Nessarose and that cyclone. MORRIBLE Yes, I suppose it was just her time. GLINDA Was it? Or did you… MORRIBLE Now you listen to me, missy! The rest of Oz might have fallen for that “Aren’t I good” routine but I know better! You wanted this from the beginning! And now you’re getting what you want! So just smile and wave and shut up! Good fortune! Good fortune, witch hunters! ALL WICKEDNESS MUST BE PUNISHED BRAVE WITCH HUNTERS, I WOULD JOIN YOU IF I COULD BECAUSE WICKEDNESS MUST BE PUNISHED PUNISHED PUNISHED BUT GOOD! ACT II, SCENE 8 (Back at Kiamo Ko Castle, ELPHABA has DOROTHY locked in the tower.) ELPHABA Oh for Oz sake! Stop crying I can’t listen to it anymore! You want see your Aunt Em and Uncle what’shis-name again? Then get those shoes off your feet! Squealy little brat takes a dead woman’s shoes, must’ve been raised in a barn! Chistery! Oh Chistery, there you are. Where are the others? Chistery, please if you don’t at least try to keep speaking you’ll never… (GLINDA arrives unexpectedly.) ELPHABA Go away. GLINDA They’re coming for you. ELPHABA Go away! GLINDA Let the little girl go and that poor little dog, Dodo. I know you don’t want to hear this but somebody’s got to say it: You are out of control! I mean, come on, they’re just shoes let it go! Elphaba, you can’t go on like this.

ELPHABA I can do anything I want, I am the Wicked Witch of the West! (One of the Monkeys flies in with a note.) ELPHABA At last! What took you so long? What’s this? Why are you bothering me with this? GLINDA What is it? What’s wrong? It’s Fiyero, isn’t it? Is he…? ELPHABA We’ve seen his face for the last time. GLINDA Oh no. ELPHABA You’re right. It’s time. I surrender. GLINDA Elphie, what is it? ELPHABA You can’t be found here. You must go! GLINDA No! ELPHABA You must! Please! GLINDA I’ll go tell everyone the truth. ELPHABA No! They’ll only turn against you! GLINDA I don’t care! ELPHABA I do! Promise me you won’t try to clear my name. GLINDA Elphaba, no!

ELPHABA Promise. GLINDA All right, I promise. But I don’t understand. ELPHABA I’M LIMITED JUST LOOK AT ME—I’M LIMITED AND JUST LOOK AT YOU— YOU CAN DO ALL I COULDN’T DO, GLINDA… (She gives GLINDA The Grimmerie.) GLINDA Elphie… You know I can’t read this. ELPHABA Well, then—you’ll have to learn. (Sings) BECAUSE NOW IT’S UP TO YOU FOR BOTH OF US— NOW IT’S UP TO YOU GLINDA Oh, Elphie… ELPHABA You’re the only friend I’ve ever had. GLINDA And I’ve had so many friends. But only one that mattered. (Sings) I’VE HEARD IT SAID THAT PEOPLE COME INTO OUR LIVES FOR A REASON BRINGING SOMETHING WE MUST LEARN AND WE ARE LED TO THOSE WHO HELP US MOST TO GROW IF WE LET THEM AND WE HELP THEM IN RETURN WELL, I DON’T KNOW IF I BELIEVE THAT’S TRUE BUT I KNOW I’M WHO I AM TODAY BECAUSE I KNEW YOU… LIKE A COMET PULLED FROM ORBIT AS IT PASSES A SUN LIKE A STREAM THAT MEETS A BOULDER HALFWAY THRUGH THE WOOD WHO CAN SAY IF I’VE BEEN CHANGED FOR THE BETTER?

BUT BECAUSE I KNEW YOU I HAVE BEEN CHANGED FOR GOOD… ELPHABA IT WELL MAY BE THAT WE WILL NEVER MEET AGAIN IN THIS LIFETIME SO LET ME SAY BEFORE WE PART SO MUCH OF ME IS MADE OF WHAT I LEARNED FROM YOU YOU’LL BE WITH ME LIKE A HANDPRINT ON MY HEART AND NOW WHATEVER WAY OUR STORIES END I KNOW YOU HAVE RE-WRITTEN MINE BY BEING MY FRIEND… LIKE A SHIP BLOWN FROM ITS MOORING BY A WIND OFF THE SEA LIKE A SEED DROPPED BY A SKYBIRD IN A DISTANT WOOD WHO CAN SAY IF I’VE BEEN CHANGED FOR THE BETTER? BUT BECAUSE I KNEW YOU… GLINDA BECAUSE I KNEW YOU… BOTH BECAUSE I KNEW YOU I HAVE BEEN CHANGED FOR GOOD… ELPHABA AND JUST TO CLEAR THE AIR I ASK FORGIVENESS FOR THE THINGS I’VE DONE YOU BLAME ME FOR GLINDA BUT THEN, I GUESS WE KNOW THERE’S BLAME TO SHARE BOTH AND NONE OF IT SEEMS TO MATTER ANYMORE GLINDA LIKE A COMET PULLED FROM ORBIT AS IT PASSES A SUN LIKE A STREAM THAT

ELPHABA LIKE A SHIP BLOWN OFF ITS MOORING BY A WIND OFF THE SEA LIKE A SEED DROPPED BY

MEETS A BOULDER HALF-WAY THROUGH THE WOOD

A BIRD IN THE WOOD

BOTH WHO CAN SAY IF I’VE BEEN CHANGED FOR THE BETTER? I DO BELIEVE I HAVE BEEN CHANGED FOR THE BETTER GLINDA AND BECAUSE I KNEW YOU… ELPHABA BECAUSE I KNEW YOU… BOTH BECAUSE I KNEW YOU… I HAVE BEEN CHANGED FOR GOOD. (The two friends embrace. And then… they hear the sound of footsteps.) GLINDA What was that? ELPHABA Hurry, no one can know you were here. THE CROWD …AND GOODNESS KNOWS ELPHABA Hide yourself—! THE CROWD THE WICKED’S LIVES ARE LONELY GOODNESS KNOWS THE WICKED DIE ALONE… (From her hiding place, GLINDA witnesses what appears to be the melting of her friend.) ELPHABA Aaaahhhhh! GLINDA Elphie? (After the witch hunters have left, she picks up ELPHABA’S hat.) GLINDA Oh, Elphie…

CHISTERY Miss… Miss… Glinda… (CHISTERY gives her a small green bottle left behind.) ACT II, SCENE 9 (In the Wizard’s Private Chambers.) MORRIBLE I don’t see why you’re so despondiary. I think it went quite well. They seemed thrilled to shreds with their brains and their hearts and everything. (GLINDA makes a sudden and unexpected entrance.) MORRIBLE Oh Glinda, I thought you’d be out festivating. GLINDA This was Elphaba’s. MORRIBLE What? WIZARD What’s that you say? GLINDA It was a keepsake. It was her mother’s. I’ve only seen a little green bottle like this one other time. And it was right here, in this room. You offered me a drink from it. WIZARD This belonged to her mother? YOUNG WIZARD’S VOICE HAVE ANOTHER DRINK MY DARK-EYED BEAUTY… WIZARD Oh my lord.— (Sings) I AM A SENTIMENTAL MAN WHO ALWAYS LONGED TO BE A FATHER… (The WIZARD sinks to his knees, heartbroken, realizing he has had his own daughter “liquidated.”)

GLINDA So she was yours all along. MORRIBLE That’s it. That’s why she had such power: She was a child of both worlds. GLINDA I want you to leave Oz. I’ll make the pronouncement myself: that the strains of Wizardship have been too much, and you’re taking an indefinite—leave of absence. Did you hear what I said? WIZARD Yes, Your Goodness. GLINDA You’d better go get your balloon ready! (The WIZARD stumbles off, a broken man, as GLINDA turns to MADAME MORRIBLE.) GLINDA Guards! MORRIBLE Glinda dear, I know we’ve had our minuscule differenceations in the past— GLINDA Madame, have you ever considered how you’d fare? In captivity? MORRIBLE What? I don’t— GLINDA Captivity. Pri-son. Personally I don’t think you’d hold up very well. You see, my personal opinion is that you do not have what it takes. I hope you prove me wrong. I doubt you will! Take her away! (The GUARDS take MORRIBLE away.) CELEBRANTS GOOD NEWS! SHE’S DEAD! THE WITCH OF THE WEST IS DEAD! THE WICKEDEST WITCH THERE EVER WAS THE ENEMY OF ALL OF US HERE IN OZ IS DEAD! GOOD NEWS! GOOD NEWS… (Back at Kiamo Ko Castle, THE SCARECROW opens the trap door that leads to the cellar where DOROTHY was held, revealing ELPHABA to be alive.)

THE SCARECROW It worked! ELPHABA Fiyero! I thought you’d never get here. THE SCARECROW Go ahead touch. I don’t mind. You did the best you could. You saved my life. ELPHABA You’re still beautiful. THE SCARECROW You don’t have to lie to me. ELPHABA It’s not lying, it’s looking at things another way. CELEBRANTS NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED NOW AT LAST SHE’S DEAD AND GONE NOW AT LAST THERE’S JOY THROUGHOUT THE LAND GLINDA Fellow Ozians. Friends… We have been through a frightening time. And there will be other times, and other things that frighten us. But if you’ll let me, I’d like to try to help. I’d like to be—Glinda the Good. CROWD GOOD NEWS! THE SCARECROW It’s time to go. ELPHABA We can never come back to Oz, can we? THE SCARECROW No. ELPHABA I only wish… THE SCARECROW What? ELPHABA That Glinda could know that we are alive.

THE SCARECROW She can’t know, not if we want to be safe. No one can ever know. CROWD GOOD NEWS… THE SCARECROW Come. GLINDA WHO CAN SAY IF I’VE BEEN CHANGED FOR THE BETTER BUT… ELPHABA AND GLINDA BECAUSE I KNEW YOU… CROWD NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED… GLINDA BECAUSE I KNEW YOU… ELPHABA AND GLINDA I HAVE BEEN CHANGED… CROWD NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED… WICKED… WICKED! (FIYERO and ELPHABA leave.) END OF ACT II