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The Secret Six™ And The Power Of Intimate Interviews The Art And Mastery Of The Intimate Interview
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Turning the Art of the Intimate Interview into a Service
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Reasons to do Intimate Interviews
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First Things First - Equipment
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To Get the Most from an Intimate Interview
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Let’s Get Started
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Worksheet –Intimate Interview Exercise
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Seven Point Emotional Bank Account
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Sustaining the Emotional Bank Account
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Worksheet – Seven point Emotional Bank Account
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The Power of Listening
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Directive Questions
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Secondary Questions
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Worksheet – Directive and Secondary Questions
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Overview of Secret Six Questions
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Types of Secret Six Questions
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The Secret Six Questions
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Rapport-Building Questions
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Likeability and Trust Questions
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Persona Questions
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Revealing Questions
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Digging Questions
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Emotional Questions
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Worksheet – Secret Six Questions
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Client – Customer – Expert Interviews
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Interviewing a Client
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Worksheet – Client Interview
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Interviewing Your Client’s Customer
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Worksheet – Customer Interview
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Approaching Experts
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Interviewing Experts
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Strategic Questions for Experts
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The Predetermined Set-Up
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Worksheet – Expert Interview
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Wrapping up the Interview
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Effective Interview Techniques
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Long pauses
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Softening Statements
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Allow them to lead
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Dig deeper
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Advanced Interview Techniques
Worksheet – Advanced Interview Techniques Preparing for the Interview
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Shaune Clarke –
[email protected]
When is an interview not a Q & A session? When it’s an Intimate Interview!
The Art and Mastery Of The Intimate Interview An Intimate Interview is not merely a matter of asking the right questions at the right time… It‟s FEELING what and when to ask.
You Do Not Want Just… “An Interview” You Want INTIMATE INTERVIEWS… . Who will benefit? Literally everyone. Copywriters…Internet Marketers…Writers...Business Owners…the list goes on and on.
If there is one skill that will improve your business, interviewing is it! As an example…
If You’re An Internet Marketer , a single interview can bring…. Increased viral traffic Powerful SEO traffic Article content creation Increased trust, offline and online Added credibility Potential JV opportunities and list exposure
Intimate Interviews… Get provocative comments Give a new or different perspective Create original content Get the interviewee excited 3
A well-done Intimate Interview is your surest way to develop a Viral Marketing Piece. You‟ll be able to create a “buzz… “You should hear what _____ said about ______!”
THIS IS… The One Skill That Can Benefit Every Part Of Your Online Marketing. If You’re a Copywriter or Write Copy For Your Business… Intimate Interviews will help you uncover…
Hidden reasons the target audience will buy Hidden reasons the target audience won‟t buy Deep emotional triggers you can‟t find any other way
The hidden objections, perceptions and hot buttons And also…
Cut your research time by half Trigger your subconscious mind – eliciting your best material Become connected and passionate about the person, product or service . Know that getting “there” is the key to effortless, emotion -driven, multidimensional copy. Copy that feels right, feels believable…
Copy that has emotion, strength and clarity.
THIS IS… Copywriting Mastery! Intimate Interviews also improve client relationships by b y increasing trust, likeability, respect and value. Imagine pulling off “The Winner”… Envision being successful because of it.
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If You’re a Business Owner or Professional… You have valuable knowledge that others will pay money to obtain. You also have colleagues and associates with knowledge. Information Marketing is a Billion dollar industry. You are in a position to use your knowledge, experience and contacts to tap into it. Through interviewing you can quickly create high-quality, in-demand information products – both written and audio. To create your own product all you have to do is have a colleague or staff member go through the program with you. They interview you and…
You interview other colleagues and experts. This begins to collect the necessary information for…
Blog posts Emails Newsletters Articles A Manual Even… Your Own Book.
With a little editing, your interviews become audio information products.
THIS IS… The Best Way To Leverage Your Assets -- Your Knowledge -- Your Experience -- Your Contacts.
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Imagine Having Your Own Product! Turning the Art of Intimate Interviews into a Service As a copywriter or marketer here‟s a tremendous opportunity you can offer to your clients. Turn your interviews into promotional tools. The banter of an interview is excellent for holding attention -- again, making for an excellent sales tool. I‟m sometimes hired to in terview others in order to create their own selfpromotional pieces. What they get is…
An interview that gives away content but is crafted so that the listener wants to know more. As an example, I just did this for a multi-faith minister. We did two interviews in an hour -- In this case the first interview was richer but there were a few great points that came out in the second interview as well. With careful editing, she now has an excellent pass-around product.
Here's what she got for hiring me: Two 30 minute interviews Provocative, revealing and informative content Editing to get the most from those interviews It provided her with the best sales tool possible! With intriguing content for an audio CD, people can listen to it in the car…o r while they‟re on the go. It increases the chances that it‟ll get listened to, as well as shared with friends and family.
The interview is provocative, revealing and informative It‟s on an audio CD
Increased exposure from being passed around In fact if you'd like to have me interview you and help you create your own potent self-promotion tool , email me at
[email protected] or call toll-free 866-486-4884. 6
No matter your goals with interviewing, you can accomplish them in a relatively short period of time… if you ingrain these techniques. Doing just one Intimate Interview a week will make a world of difference in your business…and it‟s fun! You Won't Master This Overnight
In these pages you'll find interview techniques and the secret strategies I‟ve used for years to extract potent emotional and useful information. But like any technique, studying and ingraining are essential. But like any new skill, study and practice are essential. Your goal is to ingrain these techniques, so they become natural and fluid. Then you‟ll be able to turn your full attention to the conversation you are having… which is the key to a brilliant Intimate Interview. You see, interviewing is not a passive form of listening. It‟s active participation. It‟s a tool. It‟s being tuned in to what people are “not” saying.
You will gain access to the real issues, desires and motivations of your clients, your target market, or even your friends and family. Forget about running down a list of questions. That doesn‟t work if you want to get to the deeper objections, perceptions and hot buttons. It begins with you….
The next time you react emotionally to something (like getting angry) ask yourself “Why am I reacting in this way?” You‟ll realize that the minor annoyances are usually masking a deeper issue. Dig for the answers. For example, are you annoyed with your spouse because they spilled coffee, or is it because you feel that they expect you to clean it up? Is there resentment or a feeling of being unappreciated? Perhaps that‟s the real issue at hand, not the spot of coffee on the kitchen floor. Take a few moments to figure out what‟s really at the root of your annoyance. With that realization….
Other people are approaching their own issues from their own perspectives. Interviewing requires being tuned in to this.
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Here‟s a great preliminary exercise: The next time someone is “venting” to you, refrain from offering advice. Instead, focus on being empathetic, a good listener. Give the individual‟s message your full attention…
Provide the time and space to merely express themselves Direct your attention so that they feel understood Feel what‟s going on for them…not you During an interview it‟s your job to get them to the place where they trust you , and perhaps dump something on you that is pure marketing gold!
Reasons to do Intimate Interviews One of the key things you are looking for are the desires of the T arget Audience. You‟ll be able to use these interviews to help your client sell more of her products and services by defining the qualities that have resonance with that particular market. You‟re evaluating the potential selling features for the Target Audience. Ask a member of the Target Audience and they‟ll tell you just about anything. The bad experiences they‟ve had…hidden objections… Why do they use the product or service….perceptions . The information will also enable you to define and make “Not” statements. “It‟s not this…..it‟s not that….”
Who exactly IS your Target Audience (TA)? Allow me to explain who it‟s not…. It‟s not the portion of the market that you‟re targeting. It‟s not the piece of the market you FEEL you should target (that TA specifically is most likely to buy from you anyway)
This is best illustrated with an example – Let‟s just say that you have a client with a program to market to alternative health doctors, and he thinks the Target Audience will be Chiropractors. Well, yes and no.
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Your real Target Audience is the Chiropractor who will actually be LIKELY to buy from you. Most of the times, it‟s only 1% of the market. This determination is highly specific to three things… Those who are prone or susceptible to Your particular message Your particular persona Your particular offer What are the factors in their lives that trigger the need for this product or service? Why them and not the other Chiropractors? What‟s their trigger? We should focus exclusively on them…the 1% that is likely to buy. Perhaps we could increase that from 1% to 2%. We don‟t wa nt to miss any of the TA.
Define your presentation for that 2% of the market and forget about the 98% that are not going to buy no matter what.
Key points to uncover: What the person is into, or not into What do they like about the alternative What don‟t they like about the alternative Where stage they‟re at in their lives Validate exactly what their “hot buttons” are. If you’re interviewing prominent people to develop your own e -books or articles, the same philosophy holds true .
You want to dig into their knowledge, their perspectives. If you‟re interviewing a client - What motivates her? What is her unique story? If you‟re interviewing your client‟s customers , the first thing you do is qualify them as part of the Target Audience.
What is their motivation to try the product or service? What are the circumstances in their life that led them to this point? Tip: State that you‟re looking to gather testimonials for your client. This leaves the interviewee much more open to providing a testimonial than giving you “an interview”. (Your client should be informed that this is the
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approach you‟re taking with her customers. She doesn‟t need anyone who is just a “testimonial collector”) If you‟re interviewing an Expert , figure out what other people would love to know. What differing perspectives do they have? How did they get to be where they are now? Why do they do what they do?
The techniques of Intimate Interviewing will work in any type of situation. You are digging for the deeper reasons! Reasons people buy. Reasons a product was developed. Reasons behind an expert’s rise to the top of her field.
Real Life Tidbit
One of my clients hired me to write copy for an arthritis product he had developed He was convinced that the copy should educate people about the fact that the (Major Brand Name Pain-Reliever ) they were taking were ruining the linings of their stomachs. I didn’t believe this was the proper approach, but decided to do some investigation during interviews with his existing customers. When you’re doing interviews with customers, try to figure out how they feel about alternatives. In this case, are they pro or con regarding traditional medicine? This is all part of trying to determine the perfect customer…what they need to know….and what you don’t need to have in the copy.
As far as the (Major Brand Name Pain-Reliever) …the customers really liked having these over-the-counter options. Not just for their arthritis but for other things like headaches. To have written copy slanted against these pain relievers would have alienated the TA, and decreased response. Figure out “where they’re at” The best way to handle a situation like this is to ask the customer, “Do you take pain medication?” 10
Then you can even bring it up with them in an impromptu manner. “How would you feel about the fact that it‟s ruining the lining of your stomach”. See how open or defensive they get. In this case, IF the perfect customer was already familiar with natural health, and was anti-medical esta blishment, then I wouldn’t want a Medical Doctor endorsing the product. I also found out that once they got to a naturopath, they still weren’t anti - doctor. Extremely useful information.
When you can ask specific questions of your market and get definite, heartfelt answers -- you’re in the rare position to craft a message unique to their emotions, thoughts and values.
NOTES:
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First things first… In order to be fully present during the interview, I can‟t stress enough that th e following is a necessity !
Think of how difficult it is to have a conversation while keeping a phone propped up in your ear, and using your other hand to scribble down notes. …not conducive to conversational flow at all. Recording device for your phone There are subtle nuances and opportunities missed if you‟re scribbling down the conversation. All of us have suffered through conversations where the other person was busy with tasks. Extremely frustrating and distracting, wouldn‟t you say? Rather than focusing on taking notes, you should be directing your attention to the current conversation.
Headset
How many of us talk with our hands in the course of a normal conversation? We want to keep the interview flowing as a regular conversation would. Picture that person in front of you. Gesture with your hands, if that‟s how you best communicate. This is a real conversation. With a real person. Keep it as natural as possible. Do keep a pen and paper in front of you if there is a point made that you need to get back to, jot it down…but that’s the only reason you should need them.
FOCUS -
FOCUS
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FOCUS
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To Get The Most From An Intimate Interview Clear Concise Communication
How you think the interviewee understood one of your questions may be quite different from how they actually processed it. This may also be true in how you interpret their responses. A small misinterpretation can lead to a breakdown during the interview. Have you ever said something, and realized later that your words were misconstrued? If this happens during an interview, you‟ll be able to “feel” the disconnection. Take a moment to go back and clarify the statements made.
If you suspect this is happening during the interview, don't hesitate to reiterate or ask for an explanation. Also, get into the habit of occasionally reiterating your own interpretation of what the person has said. It helps you pay attention. It ensures you are both on the same wavelength. It shows you care about what they are saying . Two basic ways to achieve this are… "So what you're saying is…" "Would I be right in that you think…"
Park Yourself at the Door
We need to set aside our preconceived notions and judgments. Think about this…how many times during the course of each day do we make decisions about other people? When someone cuts in front of us in the grocery store, or on the highway…we may think we‟re “surrounded by idiots” and our day is ruined. What we‟ve done in those cases is project our own implications or jud gments onto others. When we “label" others, we shut down our ability to truly communicate with and see people for who they really are.
During an interview, put aside your own judgments. Authentically hearing the other person requires an open mind.
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They have their own set of experiences, stresses and forms of communication that should not be evaluated according to our skewed perceptions. We‟ve all been the recipients of receiving understanding from others. Pass it along.
Do them a favor...take time for yourself
How often have you been talking to someone on the phone, only to realize that they‟re not fully present? Are you a bit annoyed when this happens? Of course! How do you suppose it feels to a person you‟re interviewing when you have to rush off the phone? Put yourself in their shoes. Clear your calendar so there‟s nothing crowding the time you‟ve scheduled to interview them.
Do whatever you need to clear your mind of any distractions. Go for a walk, meditate, or get some relaxation time before the call. Get clear. Unless you have clarity going into the interview, there can‟t be a genuine exchange, or flow, to the expressions of desire, need or pain.
Empty your own emotional burden so you can be receptive to others. Leave your baggage out of the interview. NOTES:
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Let’s Get Started! Don‟t expect to be perfect with your first few interviews. Relax. Breathe.
You are holding an excellent reference in your hands. Read it. Study it. Practice. A skilled interviewer can ask anybody almost anything, and obtain a reasonable, informative response. It's a matter of practicing the techniques laid out here. Doing the exercises, and listening to the recommended CDs will speed your progress toward becoming an expert interviewer
Each interview can be broken down into simple steps. These are outlined in an easy-to-follow manner. For example…
Learn how to gauge the Emotional Bank Account. Once you‟ve become familiar with it, move on to the Secret Six Questions.
These Secret Six Questions are the backbone of your interview process. After that…
A section on Directive Questions and Secondary Questions is provided to help you improve the quality of the interview process. Learning to phrase questions in a conversational manner means a more fluid, more connected interview. By combining Secret Six Questions with Directive and Secondary Questions, you‟re on your way to achieving an Intimate Interview. All this and more will be spelled out for you. Or perhaps…. You‟re concerned with “How” to get an interview with an influential person? It‟s really not too difficult. Just say these four powerful words… “Can I interview you?” It‟s an outstanding door -opener! There IS no faster way to gain access to the experts you admire. Being an “interviewer” sets you apart. Instantly. 15
In seconds you‟ll have attained instant credibility in that person‟s eyes, and will have gained value and importance. They‟ll feel appreciated. It‟s instant camaraderie. It‟s a great way to network to the top.
How do I Interview an Expert? Begin with your own niche. Something that you‟re comfortable with…that which you have knowledge in…something you find extremely interesting.
Why? Personally, I know I‟ll be better in the interview when I have my own “need to know”.
As in the interview with Trey Smith (Disc 10) – I wanted to know for myself – I had enough knowledge to carry on an intelligent and informed conversation and ask good questions. But I wasn‟t informed enough to be bored. In fact, the opposite was true. I was very attentive and truly wanted to know what he could tell me. It’s best to interview someone who you actually want to learn from.
Give them an authentic, heartfelt compliment. Then make a specific reference to information they‟ve presented that you like and what you now want to know more about. That real-life authenticity shows that you are into it, and that you‟re not just “doing an interview”. Experts love to talk to people who want to listen – who are into what they‟re into. It‟s part of being an expert. They want to share their knowledge with others, especially those who are willing to drink it in. Imagine this… You‟re speaking to some one and ask them what they do. They answer, “I interview people.” You‟d think twice about that person, wouldn‟t you? You‟d give them more attention. It happens all the time. Wouldn‟t you be curious about who they‟ve interviewed?
What they do interviews for?
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And…
Would you feel special, validated, and unique if you were asked to be interviewed? Of course!
As An Interviewer, You’re In
A Rare Position To Access Experts ARE YOU READY? Begin your journey to successful interviews by completing the following exercise and the rest contained in this manual. They‟re structured to provide you with a step-by-step guide on how
to achieve an Intimate Interview. Each section that requires you to have a CD player and a corresponding disc will be noted at the beginning of each section/exercise.
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Set up: Disc 1
David and Karen Interview Exercises David and Karen Interviews - Disc 1 List the times on the recording as your answers. (ie: 3:43)
1) Make a note of when I am "letting them talk.”
2) At what times you hear either of them “shift” in their emoti ons.
3) How did I respond to those shifts? List examples .
4) What is the turning point and what "opportunity" did I seize as a result? Make note of what was said, the time it occurred and especially… any insights that you may have.
Now…Listen To Best -Of-The-Best #1 – Discs 2 and 3 (Optional Exercise - Discs 4 and 5 Also) 18
Set up: Disc 6
Foby Interview Exercise Foby Interview- Disc 6 (pardon the clarity) Make note of what was said, the time* it occurred and especially… any insights you may have.
Listen to the "momentum" of the call and look for... 1) Times you feel Foby "shift" -- IE: You notice a change in his tone of voice. Why did it happen? What do you notice happens after the shift in tone?
2) When am I "letting him talk."
3) Times when you feel that I'm "exploring" -- looking for opportunities .
4) What do you feel is the "Pivotal Moment" in the Interview?
Now…Listen To The Foby Interview Coaching Call – Disc 7 19
The previous exer cises prepared you to identify…
The Seven Point Emotional Bank Account The Emotional Bank Account refers to the level of interest and involvement from the person you‟re interviewing. I've created this 7 -point system to help you gauge exactly “where” your prospect is throughout the interview. 1 = They’ve just “checked out”
2 = Watching the clock 3 = Participating out of duty 4 = Interested 5 = Talkative 6 = Emotional 7 = Don't want to stop talking -- completely connected and on topic
Notice that even in everyday conversation, people will fluctuate between some of the emotional states listed above. (Especially teenagers!) If they‟re at a Level 6, you can ask a more intimate (or probing) question and get an answer. But if they‟re at a Level 3 and yo u ask the same question, chances are they won‟t respond at all. In an interview, monitor your subject‟s changing emotional states.
The more emotional (enthusiastic, excited) a person is, the better the time to ask a strong question. Listen to their voice, their tone. Are they getting louder, more intense? When someone is more “up” or excited, it‟s an opportunity for you as an interviewer. If you have someone excited about a subject, even if it‟s not relevant to the copy or topic of the interview, let him talk. You‟re placing a deposit in his Emotional Bank Account.
What happens when you ask a strong question? …you get resistance. Your Emotional Bank Account is going to drop.
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Let‟s say you have him at a 5. He‟s talkative, but still not diggin g too deep emotionally. You ask him a strong question. He‟s just dropped down to a 3. At this point, don‟t count on getting an answer from him. But if you have him at a 7, ask that tough question. It‟ll bring him down to a 5, but you‟ll get a great an swer. You can follow up a strong question with another strong question, but you‟ll need to pay close attention to his tone before doing so.
A great way to build that Emotional Bank Account when you feel them drop, is to ask a question that brings them back to the spot where they were feeling good. “I want to go back to when you said ___________” “I have another question for you about that” but only after EBA has gone up. Monitor where they‟re at as far as their changing emotional states.
When they are at 2 or 3, don‟t even attempt the difficult questions. At 4 or 5, you probably still can't ask the real deep digging questions. So use your points carefully. You may not get them back up to a 7 before the end of the call. There are times when you‟ ll need to "budget." You may want answers to several difficult questions. But if you know you only have so much credit, you risk using it all on just one question. In this case, you‟ll have to be discriminative about which question you ask first, knowing if you run out of credit it may be the only one you get to ask.
Other times everything will go extremely well, and you may be able to ask anything without fear of “going broke." Real Life Tidbit I interviewed an inventor (Disc 1) who wasn’t very receptiv e to speaking with me. I wanted to know how much money it cost to come up with his invention. This could potentially be great information in the copy.
His initial response? "A lot of money." Of course I wanted to hear the specifics…the exact dollar amo unt. I just knew he was losing money on it. 21
But after spending 30 minutes getting him up to a 6 on the emotional scale, my account was fragile. I would not be able to ask more Digging questions. This guy was not very willing to share anything. In this situation, I had to make a decision. Ask those tough questions and lose the interview, or have him answer multiple questions that may not have rich content, but would still be useful. I opted for asking multiple questions and gleaning useful information rather than shut him down as a resource altogether.
NOTES:
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Sustaining the Emotional Bank Account Keeping your subject emotionally involved with the conversation will sustain momentum. Your conversation and banter may be enough to carry it along…to clear the way for answers to deeper questions. But that doesn‟t always happen. Occasionally the interview is not progressing well. It‟s a struggle to keep it going.
Your Emotional Bank Account is depleting. You need to raise it up again. So what do you do now? Find a unique achievement that is important to them
While listening, jot down any points that could trigger energetic conversation. (this does not mean you‟re taking notes through the whole conversation) You may need this later on to get the interviewee more involved. As an example, David had invented a product targeted for women. I found h e had a talent for something that wouldn‟t resonate with his typically female market….rebuilding motorcycles. Why did I pursue this topic with him? Because I was having trouble connect ing with him. It was an attempt to show my genuine interest, and to get him more involved in the conversation. It worked. The excitement in his voice rose because I was interested in his unique achievement. This was important to him. Look for connection. "Absolutely, I agree with you… let me ask you"…
These statements are affirmations. They create bridges from you to your subject. Be a person first, interviewer second
As well as building rapport, you‟ll get further in the interview by being authentically interested. It helps instill a conversational tone to the interview, rather than just rattling off a list of questions. 23
If you feel that the conversation isn‟t flowing - back off from the questions - see if casual talk helps lower their resistance to you. And most importantly…
Be Empathetic! You may need a few minutes to get into their frame of mind…and stay there. It‟s important to stay connected with how they are feeling througho ut the interview. Ask yourself…how is this particular person reacting to the questions you are asking or the areas being discussed? To reiterate an earlier point, be certain that you are “clear” before beginning the interview. You have taken the time to clear your thoughts, your hectic sche dule and any potential bias.
Your subject needs to feel that you have no outside agenda, other than to listen to them…without judgment. To empathize with your subject, simply ask how he feels about what you‟re discussing. This is not about what YOU feel… it‟s about what HE feels.
This may reveal more potent information than anything you had planned to ask . They‟re going to tell you much more than you can imagine if they feel that you‟re just there to hear them. By following these simple guidelines, you should generate and sustain an engaging conversation. NOTES:
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The Seven Point Emotional Bank Account Worksheet 1) Choose any one of the interview CD’s
2) Listen carefully for dips and fluctuations of tone 3) Gauge the progress of the interview on the Emotional Bank Account scale 1 = They‟ve just “checked out” 2 = Watching the clock 3 = Participating out of duty 4 = Interested 5 = Talkative 6 = Emotional 7 = Don't want to stop talking -- completely connected and on topic
4) List times and phrases indicative of changes in the Emotional Bank Account.
Time: Phrase: Time: Phrase: Time: Phrase: Time: Phrase: Time: Phrase: Set up Disc 12 – Robert Stover Interview
Time: 29:00 – 30:20. Note when the question is asked to divulge some information, Robert states “I can’t share that one”. Listen to his response when I ask if we can switch the topic. He’s slipped a few points in the Emotional Bank Account. Can you feel the difference?
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Wisdom is the reward for a lifetime of listening ... when you'd have preferred to talk. D J. Kaufman
THE POWER OF LISTENING IS KEY TO AN INTIMATE INTERVIEW As interviewers, our best information comes from speaking to clients, customers or experts. We dig for the “whys” for their motivations, purchases, or statements. An interview can reveal golden nuggets that won‟t be found anywhere else – those valuable little tidbits which are the difference between a marketing campaign that stands out from the competition, or falls flat on its face.
But our interviews – the very basis of our marketing -- are only as good as our level of listening. Let‟s face it. Most of us are lazy listeners. Our conversations are punctuated with interruptions, challenges and statements like “If I were you….” or “I know exactly how you feel!”
All well-intentioned of course, but totally disempowering. Would it be all that surprising to find out that the “automatic” listening we engage in leaves us feeling more isolated, or even more stressed?
Feeling like no one else really understands or cares. When we listen automatically….. We‟re distracted. We can‟t wait to give our opinion. We offer either/or solutions. We can‟t understand why “they” just can‟t do what they should. And…
We dictate the direction of the conversation! But the good news is… There‟s one skill you can learn that will be the difference between: An “average” interview and a GREAT interview
A work project well done and one that requires a re-do A strained relationship or a good one
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What is it? Intense Listening! There‟s a BIG difference between “hearing” and Intense Listening. “Hearing” is what we do every day. We hear things on the radio. Hear the neighbor‟s dog barking. Hear people g ripe about their relationships. But we‟re most likely not Listening.
What exactly is Intense Listening? It‟s listening with intent to understand the other person‟s frame of ref erence and feelings. Listening for the nuances, inflections and tone of voice. It‟s being tuned in to those little bits and pieces that are out-of-the-ordinary and original.
Intense Listening, combined with empathy, is using your ears, your e yes and your heart. It‟s a tremendous deposit into another person‟s emotional bank account. It‟s deeply therapeutic and healing and gives someone a way to air their issues. Intense Listening means leaving yourself behind…and focusing entirely on the other person – what HE‟s saying, what HE‟s feeling. Not an easy thing to do. We go to a whole new level of total understanding of another person. It means not judging -- not thinking about what you‟re going to say next. Of course, this isn‟t a new concept. Freud emphasized it. Karl Jung pushed his students to master the art. There are numerous papers on the subject in the psychoanalytical field. This has spilled over into other areas of medicine and into the world of marketing. Stephen Covey felt this subject was so important that Empathetic Listening i s listed in his 7 Habits of Highly Successful People as the MOST IMPORTANT type of listening. He states… “Empathetic Listening – listening/responding with both the heart and mind to understand the speaker‟s words intent and feelings. Listen for what is not being said.”
Think about this… We all know of one person we love to talk to. Someone we can really open up with. You always seem to come away from the conversation feeling good, don‟t you? 27
Have you ever wondered why? It‟s a sure bet they‟re a great listener.
Remember your first real love? You clung to every word as if it was gold. They had every ounce of your attention – you didn‟t argue or judge. The two of you felt like the most important people in the world. Perhaps you wanted to keep on talking late into the night, becau se you finally had someone who really listened – someone who really seemed to “get” you. That is Intense Listening. Feels good, right? When you‟re in that heightened state of listening, your thoughts become more focused, undisturbed. Your ability to quickly process information and respond with insightful questions and comments is magnified.
The depth of your concern, understanding and empathy is also magnified when you‟re “in the zone”.
Intense Listening isn’t a passive process To truly appreciate what the other person is saying, you need to be actively engaged. -- actively listening. This takes patience, practice and tremendous focused energy on your part. Ask questions – dig for the deeper meaning – what are they really saying? Gaining true understanding of another person -- not just becoming familiar with them -- is the goal of Intense Listening. We don‟t interrupt, finish their sentences or offer advice. If you‟re thinking this is difficult, you‟re only partly right. It‟s much more difficu lt to go through the rest of your life without this skill. Here‟s a partial list of the almost -instant changes you‟ll experience once you start to practice Intense Listening. You will…
- Improve relationships - Deepen intimacy - Make better choices - Generate respect and rapport 28
- Resolve conflicts more easily - Create win-win situations - Make more money The list could go on and on… There‟s a BIG difference between “hearing” and Intense Listening. “Hearing” is what we do every day. We hear t hings on the radio. Hear the neighbor‟s dog barking. Hear people gripe about their relationships. But we‟re not really Listening.
Intense and empathetic listening is about opening up with total understanding of another person. It means not judging -- not thinking about what you‟re going to say next. It means leaving yourself behind…and focusing entirely on the other person – what HE‟s saying, what HE‟s feeling. Not an easy thing to do. You‟re not expected to “fix” or “change” anything. You don‟t offe r your opinion.
There are very few “listeners” among us I recently went out with a group of friends and found that they all wanted to be heard…but weren‟t attentive to what was going on for others in the group. Because I was listening, I had 5 people vying for my attention before I knew it! They each had stories and perspectives to share. It was apparent that they hadn‟t been able to completely “unload” their experiences. They were starving to be heard. Within 5 minutes, I was engaged in a deep conversation with my friend, Jennifer, who is a social worker. She was frustrated with the lack of support from the administration and was recounting some of her reasons for these frustrations. Another friend, who works in the very same office, kept butting in with his o wn stories. Each time, I‟d steer the conversation back to Jennifer. Finally, the other friend started listening to Jennifer as well. He even said, “Wow…I hadn‟t heard about that before.” Honestly, he would‟ve heard about it from Jennifer at work if he‟d been willing to put himself aside for a few moments and really listen.
We see it all the time. People start out listening, only to unhook and run with their own agenda. The listening process is short-circuited. 29
We’re overloaded and overwhe lmed We all lead very busy lives. Think of who we listen to daily…spouses, children, parents, friends, co-workers, media, salespeople, etc. How can we possibly “listen” to every single message? We can‟t, so we need to allow our minds to wander. Or, cho ose which messages are important and give those our full attention.
Preoccupations and distractions are part of our daily lives. Yet -- next to survival -- the greatest need of a human being is to be understood, affirmed, validated, and appreciated. How many people ever get to “finish” being heard? Just think of how allowing someone else to be heard will affect them. And, in turn, elevate your influence because you‟re willing to HEAR them. The long-term results in possessing the skill of attentive listening will be felt in both your personal and professional life. Quicker conflict resolution – When dealing with an emotionally charged topic or crisis, focusing on listening helps both the talker and the listener remain calm. The core of the problem is identified much more quickly and the cooling down process is able to occur. Higher self-esteem and respect – An active listener gets along better with others, is perceived as confident and gathers more respect. Higher productivity – If people are encouraged to explain problems and start working through them, their output and creativity levels increase. This pertains to business as well as relationships. Fewer miscommunications – Better listening leads to better information. By listening attentively, you‟re able to more clearly see the issues experienced by the other person. The facts aren‟t misconstrued by your own interpretation.
Carl Roger (founder of humanistic psychology) offers this quote “The way of being with another person which is termed emp athetic means temporarily living in their life, moving about in it delicately without making judgments… To be with another in this way means that for the time being you lay aside the views and values you hold for yourself in order to enter the other’s worl d without prejudice…a complex, demanding, strong, yet subtle and gentle way of being.”
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Intense listening is not for wimps It takes a great deal of security to go into a deep listening experience. How many of us can…
Let go of our ego long enough to understand another person‟s perspective -without feeling like we must defend our own position? Remain completely open to another person‟s experiences… without judgment?
Leave ourselves and our hectic lives aside while listening to someone else? Become vulnerable to another person‟s emotions? It‟s not easy, but the rewards are great.
Listening During Interviews When we truly listen during an interview, we‟re better able to use effective interviewing tools like… Directive Questions – This type of question will generate something of relevance from your subject…if it‟s based on what you‟re searching for. It also provides your interviewee with a specific direction to go. Softening Statements - These help lessen the abruptness of your questions. One example of a Softening Statement is “Do you mind if I ask…” Revealing Questions – If you‟re listening, you can dig into the core of the material you want to uncover. One example of a Revealing Question is “What was the most difficult part of that for you?”
(these types of questions are explained later in the manual) We‟re able to use these and other interviewing techniques in a more effective and heartfelt manner.
The results you achieve will be nothing short of spectacular!
An effective salesman seeks to understand the needs, concerns and situations of his customer. An amateur sells the product -- the professional sells the solution. But how does he find out exactly what the customer is looking for? An effective interviewer seeks to understand a person‟s motivations, experience and reasoning. There‟s only one way to do this…Intense Listening. 31
It‟s all about viewing the world from another person‟s perspective . You‟re able to step inside another person‟s shoes -- see the world as he does.
Granted, this type of listening takes time to develop. But not nearly as much time as backing up and trying to correct misunderstandings. Think about this… It‟s much easier than having to live with the problems that result from not giving others you care about the respect they need and deserve.
The DON’T’s of Intense Listening… Do not…
Tell the other person how to fix their problems – When you offer a suggestion to someone on how to fix their problems, they may interpret it on a deep level that you think they‟re unable to do so on their own. Compare what they’re talking about to something similar in your own life Comparing what they‟re talking about to something similar in your life isn‟t the same thing as letting them know you understand. An acknowledgement of understanding should be stated briefly. The purpose isn‟t for you to engage in your story. Rather, it is to only indirectly reveal your sincere empathy. Keep it brief and not center-stage.
Try to cheer them up – You‟re not taking their emotiona l state seriously. Change the subject - You should only do this if the original subject is concluded. Otherwise, it‟ll seem as if the subject isn‟t important to you, though it very well may be to them. Interrupt – As basic as this sounds, we all do it. From now on, don‟t…or do it only sparingly. There have been interviews with Experts where it was necessary for me to stop them. Those times are rare. Here are a few types of responses we use when we’re not listening effectively …
Warning – lecturing – withdrawing – sympathizing – blaming – moralizing – scolding -- praising If we‟re honest, we‟re all guilty of responding in one or more of these ways.
Using these types of responses is controlling and invasive. The result? Any real communication ends. 32
If you‟ve been able to establish any type of real connection, it will most likely be damaged. On the other hand…
When we really deeply understand each other, we open the door to creative solutions and alternatives. Our differences are no longer stumbling blocks to communication and progress. Instead they become stepping stones to synergy.
WARNING: Practicing Before You Interview! Whatever you do, be sure to practice your new listening skills before trying to use them in an important interview. If you‟re stumbling around, or uncomfortable with this “new” type of listening… you risk permanently alienating the other person. Chances are slim you‟ll end up with the results you were hoping for. An Intense Listening situation really can be quite delicate…especially if you came together as strangers. If you‟ve been able to get them to open up to you - one wrong word can make them close up and feel embarrassed. You‟ll have to work twice as hard to get them to feel comfortable again. This Secret Six Intimate Interviews program teaches you how to avoid this. Using the various types of questions at the right times is crucial.
Here are some key points to becoming an effective and intense listener Monitor Your Own Level of Focus Let go of what you‟re goi ng to say next. Be attentive to the conversation, not to your responses. Possible comments to make are… “If I understand you correctly, you feel …” “Why did it make you feel that way…” “How did you feel when…”
Refer back to what they said without paraphrasing their statement. Especially make note of any feelings they may have revealed.
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Use Presence-Confirming Statements At first glance, these phrases may seem ordinary… but in an active listening situation, they become extremely valuable. These are statements that show them you‟re listening. They make them feel you‟re “with” them. “Uh huh” “Yes” “Really?" "Mm - mmmmm." "Interesting." "You don't say." "How about that!"
Be Aware Of Their Tonality
Pay attention to their tone, speed and inflection. This is the emotional content of the words. When you‟re present and tuned in to their tonalities, even your simple presence-confirming comments will carry more emotion. You will use them naturally, because you‟re picking up on the su btleties.
Be Fully Present
Instead of really listening, most of us are busy thinking about how we are going to respond – what we‟re going to say next - while the other person is still speaking. This is not being fully present and respectful of the conversation. Clearly, a listening connection isn‟t possible when we aren‟t fully present. But if you are able to quiet your own “internal chatter”, you‟ll be able to pick up the little nuances of what is being said… and how they‟re saying it. You‟re able to respond based on those nuances – what is REALLY being said - instead of just the “surface” material. External distractions are things that you can see or hear - things that may be impacting your other senses. A television turned on, a phone ringing or a n oisy environment. Don‟t let your thoughts drift – focus on the person who is speaking. We all have 100 other things going on in our lives, but those must take a back seat during the Listening process.
How is this done?
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Concentrate On The Speaker
Face the speaker. Your shoulders and your face should be “open” and facing them completely. Don‟t angle away from them. This will force you to focus. If you‟re doing the interview over the phone, still be attentive to your body language. It‟s conveyed even if they can‟t see you.
Spend time trying to understand what the speaker is trying to say instead of trying to figure out how it affects us or what we want to say in return. Questions should be not have an interrogative feel to them. Come From A Place Of Understanding
Try to put yourself in their shoes. If you want to truly understand where the speaker is coming from, forget about your own situation and feelings. Try to see things from their perspective and frame of reference. Sounds easy…but it t akes practice.
Never Assume
We all do it. It could be that we‟ve had a similar experience. Whatever the case, It‟s easy to think that we already “know” what someone is going to say. Instead, allow them state their point fully. You‟ll receive the whole message and be able to respond in a more open manner.
There have been times when, although I thought I knew how someone would answer, they surprised me by taking it in a completely different direction. Typically this happened when I asked a follow-up question. Be certain you have their perspective…not yours. Use follow-up clarifying questions such as… "Tell me the whole story." "What did you do then?" "You used the word ________, what exactly did you mean by that?” IMPORTANT - Check Your Emotions
Be aware of topics and things that trigger your emotions. Increase your efforts to focus on a clear understanding of what‟s being said.
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For example…
A lot of people are passionate about politics or religion. What are your views? If someone has an opposing view, how does it make you feel? Are you able to put your own perspective aside and really hear someone else‟s ? Be An Active Listener Ask questions and seek clarification. Actively share in the speaker‟s efforts to improve your level of understanding, whether or not you agree with their point of view.
Have Them Understand That You Understand
State your understanding, but be brief. You don‟t need to get into a full -blown story of your own life, but rather acknowledge an incident that may have been similar to theirs. Communicating is not just saying words … it’s creating true understanding .
During An Interview… Seek first to understand – Take yourself out of the picture. Don‟t allow your ego to get in the way of any valuable information you might obtain. By accepting them, you create a high Emotional Bank Account. Notice your responses - Are you evaluating the other person? Offering advice? These may be typical responses in communication…but an effective listener does none of this. Be authentic. An individual will see right through you when you‟re not with them emotionally. If they feel that you‟re not being open (even subconsciously) they won‟t want to divulge or share any pertinent information. Always enter an interview as if you‟re get ting together with your best friend, someone you can trust, someone who has something wonderful to tell you.
The Rewards of Intense Listening If you’re a copywriter… You‟ll be able to quickly get to your Target Audience‟s objections, perceptions and hot buttons. This saves you time and quickly gets you directly into copy that pulls a higher response.
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If you’re an interviewer… You‟ll get fresh, provocative insights and comments from the Experts. Also, word will spread that an interview by you is sure to generate positive exposure for them.
In your business and p ersonal life… There‟s nothing else like learning to truly listen. All relationships improve and understanding is achieved. Daring to be completely open to another person is powerful and instills trust. Try this experiment…. The next time you‟re in a social situation, notice how many people are truly “listening”. It‟s going to be rare to find even one. Then practice Intense Listening. Just don’t be surprised at how many people want to talk to you!
NOTES;
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What do we want to know? The hidden objections – the compelling story – the hidden desires … Before we start the Secret Six Techniques, you should first unde rstand how to utilize Directive and Secondary Questions. These will be used along with the Secret Six Questions to get the most out of your interviews.
Set up: Disc 8, Disc 9, Disc 11
Directive Questions There are times when it‟s good to just let your subject talk – I call this letting him “dump.” Even tually though, you will be trying to get to specific information. Directive questions will help get you there. The Directive Question focuses in on your target, as well as “softens” the initial question. It will generate something of relevance from your subject…if it‟s based on what you‟re searching for.
Placing a Directive Question directly after your primary question also defines which direction the answer lies. If you‟re asked a single, direct question, you typically give back a singular answer. Correct? “Were you speeding?”
“Yes sir.”
Pointed abrupt questions = surface answers.
Avoid this at all costs. Imagine the same question, asked along with another. “Were you speeding? Are you in a hurry to get somewhere?” “Yes sir. My wife is in the back seat having a baby.” Okay, that‟s a bit dramatic but you get the point. The first question, “Were you speeding?” is a very direct question. It‟s rather intimidating when asked by itself. But by adding the second question, “Are you in a hurry to get somewhere?” you soften it. It also helps define the answer you‟re searching for – which in this case could be the “story” behind the action.
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The Directive Question will: Pinpoint the answer Soften the edge of that first question Help maintain the flow and momentum of the call
Ask your first question. With the second (or Directive) question, define it for your subject. Don‟t let them go on blindly. Something to think about... A Directive Question leads them gently down the conversational path. It prevents the subject from having to pause …then think, “What did he mean by that?” Let‟s assume you‟re in the middle of an interview. The other person has several topics on her mind. By stating a question…by itself…you will stop that thought process. She‟ll be trying to guess which venue to go down. It‟s too abrupt and interrupts the flow of the conversation. Let‟s follow this as if in an actual interview…without a Directive question. Q: “How do you know that?” A: “How do I know what?”
(Natural flow of conversation is immediately halted. She‟s checking her watch, slightly annoyed.) Try this instead… Q: “How do you know that? Had you already tried the alternative?” Can you “feel” how the disconnecting pause was prevented? To reiterate…
The Directive question complements the first question with something relevant to what you want to know. It‟s based on what you‟re searching for.
Define it for your subject Don‟t allow them to go on blindly You define the conversation…in a natural man ner 39
*Each of the Secret Six Question types can take on the form of a Directive Question.
Listed are examples of questions followed by Directive questions found in the interview materials. You‟ll notice that very rarely do I ask one single, pointed question. It‟s typically followed up immediately with at least one or two more directive questions.
Excerpts: Disc 8 - Brian Keith Voiles
2:40 How do you know that? How does somebody know it if they’re not…? 7:40 – How do you know that? If it’s such a choice, why isn’t everybody choosing it? How do you know it’s a choice? Disc 9 - Brian Keith Voiles
10:45: “And so, what have you done, Brian, when you’ve gone into this big huge starving crowd with lots of competition? Have you essentially become another 1 in the pile, or have you somehow differentiated yourself to attract your section of that niche market?” “How did it happen? Why did it happen? Who used to do that? Who’s the master of artful writing from the past?”
Disc 11 - Robert Stover
27:20 “So now that you know this, Robert, how do you apply it? Do you just kind of have your radar up that when you have this kind of…I’ll call it “fear” attention…are you better able to recognize that?”
NOTES:
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Set up Disc 1
Secondary Questions While Directive Questions are used to clarify your first question…Secondary questions can be described as Digging questions. They were designed to direct your subject‟s focus towards something specific. To use them effectively… Your “intuitive radar” must be up throughout the interview.
Many times you will want to follow-up on something interesting or provocative your subject just said. You‟re noting what they‟ve said and how they‟ve said it. You‟re tuned in to their responses. They‟ve tossed an intrigui ng comment or phrase your way. Perhaps answered your question with something totally off-topic. That‟s a subconscious invitation to follow them down the rabbit hole… You‟ll have to decide whether or not you really want to go there.
Example: Disc 1
Sanitizer Product Interviews 53:55 Primary Question: Tell me another story about someone that’s called the office.
A: (goes into explanation of how a worker at a nursing home cut her finger on a wheelchair. The finger got infected and the worker died three days later from a flesh-eating bacteria) Secondary Question: So she had picked up something from that wheelchair? Listen for times when you‟ve asked them something, and their response surprises you. Maybe it‟s a curious inflection…or word choice…o r you sense an underlying emotion. It may even trigger something in you, a gut feeling that this could lead to something interesting or useful.
Trust your intuition. Example: “Previously, you used the word “painful” to describe _______…why did you use that particular word?” 41
“When you say ______, explain what you mean by that. Define that . What does that mean to you?”
Dragging them back out of the rabbit hole
There will be times when the emotional bank account is going to be high. The person will become very comfortable, very talkative…and they‟ll go off -track. Depending on the subject, you may not want to pursue it. During one such interview, I struggled to bring my subject back on topic… I was interviewing one of my client‟s customers and he wa s starting to delve into past emotional issues. I really didn‟t want him to go there. It took a couple of tries on my part to bring the conversation back to the subject at hand.
As an example: “My dad used to go down to the bar every night. I think my mo m preferred having him gone.” In this case, I really didn‟t want to go there. Let‟s look at it from another point of view…
If I had been interviewing my client, I would want a bit of background. But I would be looking for something less destructive like: “I’m determined to be a success because my dad never was. In fact his business went bankrupt when I was 7 years old, and he ended working for my grandfather. I swore that would never happen to me.”
Can you feel the difference? It’s emotion -driven, but not destructive.
The difference is... The above statement could be a piece of the client‟s Unique Selling Point. He‟s driven. He‟s motivated and this is part of the cause for it. It doesn‟t mean I‟d be interested in hearing about dad‟s failed business…if it was coming from my client and not one of his customers. If I‟m interviewing one of his customers, I‟m searching for his/her reasons that they buy. This most likely will not include their traumatic childhood…UNLESS it directly pertains to your c lient‟s product. 42
So, how do you respond to an off-topic statement like… “My dad used to go down to the bar every night. I think my mom preferred having him gone.”
Bring it back on-topic. You start by acknowledging what they just said. Then you direct them back to the conversation you want to have. “Huh, that’s something. Now, I’d like to go back to the article you were telling me about…..”
Do your best to make it as seamless as possible. Ideally, use something they‟ve already stated for the direct tieback. Refer to a comment or word, or use a transitional sentence to bring them back.
Transitional sentences:
Getting back to the ___________, could you explain that a bit more? I hope you won‟t mind, but could I ask you to define_________ I‟d like to go back to the point you made about __________
It would be really great if you could take some time to tell me about________ Previously, you used “___________” to describe _______…why that particular phrase?
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DIRECTIVE AND SECONDARY QUESTIONS WORKSHEET Set up Disc 9 – Brian Keith Voiles Interview List examples of 10 Directive Questions followed by Secondary Questions
1) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
2) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
3) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
4) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
5) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
6) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
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7) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
8) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
9) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
10) Directive Question:
Secondary Question:
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Overview of the Secret Six Questions Follow the natural, conversational progression of the interview with the Secret Six. Open the interview with Rapport-Building questions and feel your subject become more relaxed and open. Offer them an authentic compliment. It goes without saying that your very real interest will elevate their willingness to speak freely. Once rapport has been established, the interview will naturally move into the Likeability and Trust questions. This helps build their confidence, and the conversation should begin to develop a natural flow. They need to feel that what they‟re telling you is of utmost importance. Your job is to really hear them, as well as guide the conversation. Persona Questions are the starting point to defining your subject. Who are they not? What are some of their behaviors, lifestyles or patterns? By now, your conversation should be occurring rather easily.
The next step is getting into the Revealing Questions. You want to know “Why do you…?” “How…?” As well as “Why not…?” Asking some of these questions may bring them down a notch as far as being willing and open to providing answers. Digging Questions pave the way for emotion-driven responses. You may need to dip into your Emotional Bank Account, or the goodwill you‟ve built with your subject, at this point.
Then come the Questions for Emotional Material . You‟re tuned in and listening to them. Knowing how to ask these questions and at what time provides your interview with great content. Who Should I Start With?
I strongly suggest that you start with at least 6 interviews of friends and family. You‟ll become more familiar with the process, m ore comfortable with your role as interviewer, as well as recognize areas for improvement. Once you feel ready to do a “real” interview, start fishing in the smaller ponds, at least for a short while. Begin your first “live” interview with your client‟s customers, the less influential ones. If you‟re interviewing people for your own products, start with the “lesser: experts. They‟ll still provide you with great material, as well as allow you to hone your skills. 46
Tip: Until you’ve gained a fair amount of experience, interview more people than necessary. This will ensure you get the material you’re looking for. Plus, by doing “extra” interviews early on, you will become a better interviewer in a shorter amount of time.
NOTES:
In order to do a great interview…an Intimate Interview, you must be able to determine the best time to ask one of the questions from the Secret Six.
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Types of Secret Six Questions Rapport Building - Likeability and Trust Persona - Revealing Digging - Emotional It‟s not enough to just blurt out the question. Your questions must be asked at just the right time; otherwise you‟ll get a “surface” answer. You can work with surface answers, but deeplyconnecting material comes from the greater depths .
Getting that richer, deeper material is the whole purpose for the interview. This makes the timing of “when” the questions are asked very critical. When you have built up the “Emotional Bank Account” during the interview, your subject will feel safe enough to give you emotional, deeper-than-surface material.
Effectively prepare for what could happen during the interview by understanding: What will decrease the emotional bank account What will increase it How to prevent your subject from emotionally disconnecting Approaching this strategically will give you pure “interview gold”. You will…
Know how to control the emotional tempo Recognize when and how to ask the right questions Unearth the deep, underlying reasons they buy or don‟ t buy.
A comprehensive understanding of the Intimate Interview Process/Strategy will give you a decided advantage. Without interviewing, Only the top 10% of copywriters ever actually dig this deep…and they generally do it on autopilot with no conscious idea of how it happens.
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Without interviewing, It can take days and weeks to come up with enough content to create articles, e-zines, blog posts or e-books. But by using the Intimate Interview process, you will have access to expert advice, extremely valuable insights and market definition. Study and learn the various types of interview questions and their functions. By strategically positioning them within the flow of the interview, you‟ll uncover the richest material necessary for great copy and product creation. Tip: By positioning the interview as “Market Research”, you can give yourself license to delve a little deeper if it serves the purpose .
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Set up: Disc 13
The SECRET SIX Questions Foundational Quest ions To Get You Started… The following questions are in basic format. In this manner, you‟ll gain a clear and concise working knowledge of their purpose. Follow these up with a Directive Question to gain a more insightful answer.
If necessary, use a Secondary Question for further investigation. After you become more proficient and familiar with the purpose of these basic questions, reference the Client – Customer – Expert Interview sections.
1) Rapport Building Questions These Questions Help Loosen Up Your Interviewee, As Well As Reflect Your Genuine Interest In Their Product/Service
Building rapport may happen in a matter of moments, or may take 10 minutes. It all depends on your approach, as well as your subject‟s personality. Taking this time to put them at ease will provide great value through the remainder of the interview. Why are you doing this? Why is it so important to you? How long have you been doing this? Tell me something you really like about your product/what you do What gets you the most excited about it? Why is that? Here‟s what I really want to know…. I want to know If______________. How you_________. When you________. Do you__________. Can you_________. Have you ever…
Wanted to___________. Said_______________. Considered__________. Felt like_____________. 50
Ask these general questions until you can feel a “flow” to the conversation.
2) Likeability and Trust Questions Begin To Form The Foundational Knowledge of Your Subject
What do you most want people to know? What do you most want your customers to get from you? What does your product/service do like no other? What do you know that nobody else knows? Can you give a “before and after” example?
How do you know that? –this is a BIGGIE. It could help uncover the Compelling Story. Example: In an interview I did for a stock trader, I asked his client… “When you say there’s a fortune to be made in trading, how do you know that? What were some of the indications?” His reply was used directly in my copy.
3) Persona Questions Your Radar Needs To Be “Up” In Order To Catch
Inflections In Their Voice Which Indicate The Deeper Benefits or Key Points
The purpose of Persona Questions is to look for material which creates resonance. You‟re trying to find a common thread of the persona of the Target Audience A Persona Question will identify behavior patterns such as…
Definition of a Persona Question: Identifies behavior patterns such as…
Why do they make decisions about certain products How does the product fit into the flow of their day Why are they using the product in the first place Does it fulfill a goal they have Does it alleviate a problem Does it improve their lives 51
We‟re hoping to find out what is triggering their purchase, or motivating them.
Tell me what you really like about _________. What‟s your best experience with that? Directly follow up the moments where you can feel emotion coming from them. Tell me what‟s behind what you were just… Saying. Thinking. Wanting to ________.
After they have explained a pertinent “event”, ask them, “Why do you think that happened?” This will give you deep insight as to their perceptions and frame of mind in regards to that experience. Attitudes and environments are significant. For each product, there is a small set of personas….one of whom will be the primary focus for your copy. That one persona could represent hundreds of people with similar goals and behavior patterns which would benefit from your product or service. What you‟re trying to find out about your client, product or service is….
How does this relate to the target audience? Who is the target audience? What does it mean to them? What is it “not” to them?
What is it like? How is it similar? Get the customer to “dump” their perspective to you so you can tell where they‟re coming from. This will help define if they‟re part of the target market.
Example:
In conducting interviews for an Arthritis product, I found that a good portion of the TA was living alone, thus more motivated to be self-reliant. 52
They were more likely to try a new product. It was a common personality trait which built resonance with those most likely to buy…that is the real TA. Tip: There will be times when the line between Persona Questions and Revealing Questions is quite blurry
4) Revealing Questions Reasons They Buy -- Reasons They Don’t Buy Exactly When They Buy
Here are some questions you might ask a business owner or top salesman: Where do most of your sales come from? Why? What‟s your best -selling product? Why do you think that is?
What do you find easiest to sell? Who is it easiest to sell to? Why is that? After they explain a product/benefit, ask…
Is that a common experience for people? What is a not-so-common, but compelling result you see? Other Revealing Questions would be: How would you describe……
Why did you do it that way? What surprised you about the result? What kind of an experience was that for you personally? On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being Fantastic! and 1 being Awful, how would you rate that experience for you personally? Given your preference, is that the way you prefer to work? Why? Did you receive adequate credit for your efforts? Why do you think the situation was approached in that way? What was the most difficult part of that for you? Why? What did you think of that? Did that make sense to you? Should that have been done differently? Was that your preference? How would you like to have seen it done differently? If it was your call to make, how would you have decided? What was wrong with that approach? 53
If you had your preference, how would you... How did that decision strike you? What was your biggest frustration with... If you could do that over again, how would you approach it? Revealing Questions will provide you with rich, rewarding material to better define and get to know your client, or their TA. 5) Digging Questions Open The Door For Emotional Material While digging for information, you‟ll most likely lower your emotional bank account. That‟s why it‟s best to “soften” these questions. Barging in like a news reporter and placing demands upon a person will likely end up with a door being slammed in your face, or a dial tone in your ear. Use qualifiers so your subject realizes that you‟re sensitive to the fact that the question may be unsettling for them.
Examples of qualifiers: “Please allow me to ask you…” “If you’d be so kind as to answer this….” Tune in to when the light “goes on” for them. When do they really “get it”?
How did you get to this point? What was the first step in that process? How did you come to this conclusion/result? What‟s the #1 reason that ____________? What‟s the one thing that _____________? How did your life change…for the better?
Examples of Questions along with Softeners and Directive Questions from some of my interviews : “Do you mind if I ask how much money you did lose?” “Who do you find are your customers? If you could describe your typical customer, how would you describe them? How do they come in contact with you?”
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“Give me your quick rundown if I‟m a prospect of yours….give me your presentation, if you will. As if I‟m a new person. Just go through the basic questions for me.” “Do you know what your conversion is? How many actually become customers?” “Is it true that even if I have a run of the higher gains, if I have a loss it‟s a higher loss so I kind of go back to zero?” “I want to get straight on the number…when you‟re talking on a modest trade, what category would you put that?” “So if you had one big tip to give to people…one thing that you‟ve learned thru your experience….what would that be?” “So continue then, with answering my basic questions on how the trades come in, how I get started, and that type of information.” “Explain to me what you go thru on a daily basis…on a weekly basis…”.
At this stage, be especially alert when they use an interesting word or phrase.
Follow up on it by asking Could you please define (interesting word or phrase) for me?
6) Questions for Emotional Material Specific Questions For Deeper Insights Of course, you‟ll get emotional material from some of the above questions, but don‟t stop there.
Why do you think you feel/felt that way? Was it because of _____________? Key in on certain words or phrases, or add vocal emphasis. As an example, when people use the word “especially”, ask… What do you mean by “especially”? When an emotion, such as enthusiasm or concern, is expressed, ask…
How did that make you feel? How do you know that on such an intimate level? 55
This is an adaptation on “How do you know that?”, but it goes deeper. This question needs to be asked in an authentic manner, but if you get the chance to do so, grab it. Work to bring out the emotion you’re sensing. There will times when you‟ll hit one of your subject‟s hot buttons quite by accident. This occurs because of your genuine interest in them. You‟re tuned in and really listening to them. Why do they think or feel a certain way? This will help to bring out those underlying emotions.
When you‟re reviewing your own recorded interviews, do you have a sense of what they‟re feeling? You want to confirm this. So in your next interview, when your emotional bank account is high, ask them. Example:
During an interview with customers of an arthritis product, I sensed a loss of dignity with the ailment. It was “sensed”, but they hadn’t expressed it verbally. As an interviewer, I wanted to find out how emotional was it for the Target Audience. In my next interview, I wanted to find out. When the Emotional Bank Account was high enough, I was able to ask “Sounds like you’ve even lost a sense of yourself…your dignity perhaps (softens it)… Is that so?” Feel the difference in that question as opposed to, “Do you feel a loss of dignity from having arthritis?” BIG difference. You’re allowing her to tell you instead of you telling her. When in this situation, your subject may come back with “Absolutely!” Whatever comes next is gold.
Other potential questions _____(ex: I decided at an early age I wasn‟t What you just said, _____________ going to be like that), what exactly did you mean?
At times, it isn’t a specific question that triggers the emotional material. It’s the comfort level that has been achieved which allows an atmosphere of sharing..
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Example : Disc 13 - Alan Forrest Smith 56:00 Alan and I are discussing the lack of depth in much of today’s copy. I asked him if he knew why that was. Here’s his response… “One of the problems these days, Shaune, is that people have hande d the ir brains over…to TV …to radio…to iPod….to MP3….to videos…to movies….”
He expounds, frustrated that people are on the information “highway”…taking in so much information to the point of inaction. This interview is an example of a sharing of ideas, opinions and concepts, as opposed to asking a lot of questions. Following are a few more personal questions that may be used, dependent upon the comfort level of the interviewee. Reminder: Define your interview from the start as “Market Research”.
Once the interviewee is comfortable, introduce a few of the following questions (just pick a few) by saying… ”Now, I‟d like to ask a few of our market research questions. We‟re getting to know the type of person that (“you” or “your client”) resonates with. Do you mind if I ask a few questions about your personal preferences?”
Some basic personal questions to choose from: 1. What books are you reading now? 2. If you woke up tomorrow, and could do whatever you wanted to in those first four hours, what would that be? 3. Do you have a motto you follow in life? 4. If you could make one change in your life, what would that be? 5. What's the most important lesson you've learned in life? 6. What three words best describe you? NOTES:
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Asking questions in a way that is conversational as opposed to a Q & A session is key to obtaining the very best material.
WORKSHEET FOR THE SECRET SIX QUESTIONS Come up with 3 of your own questions in the following categories: RAPPORT BUILDING QUESTIONS
1) 2) 3) LIKEABILITY AND TRUST QUESTIONS
1) 2) 3)
PERSONA QUESTIONS
1) 2) 3)
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REVEALING QUESTIONS
1) 2) 3)
DIGGING QUESTIONS
1) 2) 3)
QUESTIONS FOR EMOTIONAL MATERIAL
1) 2) 3)
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Client – Customer – Expert interviews There are similarities in your approach to interviews with Clients, their Customers, and Experts. In all interviews, you want “The Compelling Story”. What is that person‟s history?
How did they get to where they are now? What were their motivating f actors to… Develop their product or service (Client) Try the product or service (Customer) Expand their knowledge in their chosen field (Expert) We’re looking for… Real Life Tidbits. The Compelling Story. and the “Reason Why” However…
The types of stories you want from each of them will be slightly different. The questions you ask will reflect these differences. For example... With a Client, find what triggered the reasons to develop their product or service. Get their history. Is it a family-owned business that was handed down? Or was it something they started because it could fill a void in people‟s lives? From your client‟s Customers, find out why they‟re using that product or service. It must be solving a need or problem. Find what that probl em is. How did it develop? How is it different now? What was their life like before using this product or service?
When interviewing an Expert , dig for background information as well as informative tidbits on their area of expertise. How did they develop their knowledge…and why? Be tuned in to the deeper emotional reasons for all of the above. W hat occurred in their lives that motivated them to… Try a product Develop a service 60
Want to share their knowledge Find that trigger point. With Clients and Customers, the interviewer is the authority of sorts. With experts, the rules change slightly. Be attentive to the “feel” of the various interviews on the CD’s as you’re listening to them.
NOTES:
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Interviewing a Client Your client is an expert in their own business. Your job is to find what makes them unique…sets them apart from the competition. I‟ve had clients who feel that they don’t have an interesting story. This has never been the case. In fact, what seems common to them may be extremely interesting to others.
One of the easiest ways to find their story is to gently start digging into the background. It comes down to finding their specific “reasons why”. Find their past history…
Sample Questions to Ask a Client Revealing - So I’m wondering what led you to Interior Design? ” Directive -
“It seems like you‟ve done a lot of things before Interior Design.
Digging -
“What is your favorite thing to do?
Directive -
If you could wake up tomorrow morning and choose whatever you wanted to do in the next four hours, what would it be?”
Digging -
“How would you describe your clientele?
Directive -
I‟m guessing they‟re somewhat affluent.”
Digging -
“I’d like to hear more about that…”
Emotional - “You just said that you‟d love to see your business triple within the next year. Is that a nagging thought for you ? Secondary - Do you have this thing in your mind saying that there‟s something you should be doing?” Emotional - “What things bother you, o r things you’d like to improve about your business?” Revealing - “What would you attribute your interest in ____________ to?”
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Digging -
“Tell me about that .
Directive -
“How do you know that on such an intimate level?”
Digging -
“How, exactly, would you describe your perfect customer?” (this gives you a sense of their defined Target Audience)
Digging -
“Why did they buy from you at that specific point in time?” (defines motivating factors)
Digging -
“Would they refer you to others?”
Secondary - “Why? If not, then why not?” Digging -
“What specific benefits do they see in your competitor’s product?
Even when you think you know the answer, ask them. How do they feel it…say it…express it?
Get it from their heart and soul. NOTES:
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CLIENT INTERVIEW WORKSHEET What other questions could you ask a client? 1)
2)
3)
4)
5)
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Interviewing Your Client’s Customer You‟ve been hired to interview your client‟s customers. With this type of interview, your primary focus will be on the “reasons why”.
Why did they feel the need to try this product What problem is it solving What have they already done to try to solve the problem What emotions does having that problem bring up for them What can they do now that they couldn‟t do before using the product What was their life like before using the product Most importantly, allow them to feel your genuine concern and interest. Their problem and the solution is your focus. Be on the lookout for “odd” or “standout” words and phrases. These are not your typical “It‟s a good product” answer. Your ears should perk up when you hear them say, “Absolutely!” or “Without a doubt!” These are stronger emotional statements. Dig in. Find out what‟ s behind them. Follow up on these statements by asking… “What do you mean by _______” “Could you define _______”
Sample Questions for Current Customers Revealing -
“Tell me that story… .
Directive -
How did you come across (product or service), and what happened from there?”
Digging -
“Tell me a little bit more about that .
Directive -
“Had you already tried other things instead?”
Digging -
“Then what happened ?”
Digging -
“When you say _________, does that mean __________?” 65
Emotional - “How do you know that? Directive -
“How do you know that this works better than XYZ product?”
Emotional - “ You say that with such certainty.” Directive -
“Why is that?”
Digging -
“Of all the things you can now do in your life (because of the problem being solved), what is the thing of which you’re most appreciative?”
Digging -
“What makes you the perfect customer for this product?”
Revealing - “On the day that you bought the product, what was motivating you – on that day vs. the da y before?” Secondary - “What made you really need a solution?” Digging -
“Have you referred the product to others?”
Directive -
“If so, what have you said to them?
Sample Questions for Prospective Customers Digging -
“What would be your greatest motivation to try this product?”
Secondary - “What would be another reason for you to try it?” Digging -
“Have you tried a similar product in the past?”
Digging -
“What would prevent you from buying it?”
Secondary - “Fill in the blank – I wouldn‟t: try it if ________” Persona -
“What’s: the one thing you’ve have to know for sure before spending money on this?”
Secondary - “What else would you need to know?” 66
Ask digging questions… “If you were going to recommend the product to someone, and for whatever reason they were reluctant to try it, what would you say to them?” And, if they‟ve already told others… “What did you say to your friends and family when you told them about the product?” Keep in mind this is the “dumping”. At the end of their reply, ask… “If there was one more thing you‟d say to someone who was reluctant, what would that be?”
Keep bringing it back When you‟ve asked a digging/tough question, and the reply was short, it‟s good to reiterate the point back to the interviewee.
Example: Q: “When you say was there anything in particular that drew you to this product over another?” A: I looked up the ingredients, and figured let’s try this and see.
Q: Had you tried other products containing any of these same types of ingredients? How have those worked?” Reasons to reiterate (or “bring it back”)
It keeps the conversation going Acknowledges the point they just made Helps them to feel like you‟re “with” them They‟re still present to that point – their mind is able to search for other comments connected to it.
Make them feel their input is valuable. Your interview will be much richer for it.
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CUSTOMER INTERVIEW WORKSHEET What other questions could you ask your client’s customer?
1)
2)
3)
4)
5)
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One of the questions I get asked the most is,
“How do I approach experts for interviews?” First let me say this… Once you know how to actually perform an Intimate Interview, you will “know” that you have a great experience to offer. Experts love a great interviewer! Ask any expert about their favorite interview, and you‟ll hear just how much they enjoyed it.
It really is a memorable experience. When you‟re able to create that experience, you‟ll have a confidenc e – a knowing – of what you have to offer. To get this depth of understanding…
- Read this entire manual - Do the exercises - Listen to the CD’s - Read the manual again - Do the exercises in your “weak” areas - Practice, practice, practice!!!
Also, record a few of your practice interviews and review them to find the areas you could improve upon, as well as what you did well. It doesn‟t take a long time to acquire these skills, especially when you consider that you‟ll be using them throughout your whole life! When you do approach an expert, be enthusiastic. They‟ll “sense” that you‟re an above-average interviewer…someone that they want to be interviewed by. You could also mention a person you just interviewed, and their positive response from that interview.
No question about it, I highly recommend you start with a few practice interviews. Not just to build your skills, but to heighten confidence as well. Most Experts Want To Be Interviewed!
On top of the engaging experience you have to offer, here‟s their big “Reason Why”… 69
All experts know the power of exposure – the power of sharing a piece of themselves as a sample of who they are and what they do. This is particularly true if the expert happens to currently be promoting something. They have something they want to spread the word about, and an interview with helps them accomplish that goal. No question about it, they‟re always ready for free exposure. Simply put… You will offer others a piece of that expert‟s knowledge, a provocativ e comment or something “revealing”. In exchange, the expert gets introduced to a new audience. That‟s win -win! So if an expert feels it‟ll be a fun experience…an engaging interview…and they can get free exposure, that‟ll usually do it.
A few tips on how to leverage moments into big interviews
Opportune moments: One of the best times to ask for an interview is at one of the expert‟s own events or especially at an event where they are speaking – where they aren‟t as consumed with the running of the event. It‟s somewhat assumed that if you‟re there, then you must be “somebody”. At the very least, you have paid to be there, so there is an “economic relationship”. You have paid to see them – they appreciate that – and are open to reciprocating if they can. Not to mention that they are in “share information” mode.
In fact, I once saw a guy who simply brought a Camcorder to an event. He hung out in the hotel and used “chance meetings” to pull experts into an unused portion of the hotel restaurant to do video interviews. I know because he interviewed me! Leverage Who You Know
This is quite simple and straightforward. Whatever your topic or niche, ask others who they know in that particular field. Leverage that relationship to score interviews. 70
Start by explaining your project “I‟ve put up a website called _________.com. I‟ll be interviewing experts and offering the recordings. (these could be free to generate viral traffic, or as a paid-for info product)
I was wondering who you might know that _____ __________” Getting To Top-Tier Experts For experts that are a bit less reachable, you can start “where you‟re at”. The points above are powerful. They can get you at least “second -tier” interviews. Once you‟ve done enough of them and created a couple o f great pieces from them, you‟ll be building your reputation as an interviewer. After each “Intimate Interview” – when you know they‟ve enjoyed the experience – their Emotional Bank Account is at a high level. You can ask them who they might be able to introduce you to.
Eventually one of them, based on the success of your interview, will endorse you to a top-tier expert. So, in some cases you‟ll need to climb the ladder. Keep in mind…
Sometimes the second-tier interviews are better, especially when it comes to being provocative. They want exposure, so if they have something strong to say, they‟ll be more willing to “let it go”. Not to mention that you may be able to get a second-tier expert to reveal something about a top-tier expert. Provocative and Revealing don‟t have to come from top-tier experts to “go viral”! What if you haven‟t gone to a seminar, or other places where experts “hang out”? Here’s something else that works… I like to call it “Getting Scrappy”.
Are you determined to get that elusive interview? The one that you just know will provide you with top-notch material? It can be done. Just perhaps not through the “typical” venues. 71
The best way to describe it is to show you how I‟ve done it. Here‟s how it all began for me….
With an authentic desire to learn from others, I began buying their programs…getting on their mailing lists. When I came across an item or statement that I appreciated, I‟d be sure to email or call them to let them know. Most times, I‟d get a response. To me, t his was a door-opener. A dialogue would develop and before too long, I was able to get them on the phone for an interview.
A relationship was established due to the previous rapport that had been built. Also they‟d leave the interview with a positive opi nion which paved the way for future communication.. These relationships have been leveraged for mutual benefit. We all profit from them, as there isn‟t a feeling of being “used”. Getting experts, or anyone for that matter, to hang up the phone after an interview knowing it was a mutually beneficial experience is key. Becoming proficient in the Intimate Interview process will raise you up to that level quite quickly. Still, you‟ll need to work to get the interview.
You may encounter reluctance from experts I‟ve been on both sides of being the i nterviewer and the interviewee. You don‟t truly appreciate a good interview until you‟ve seen what else is out there. A bad experience…
A woman asked to interview me, and I gladly agreed. She came to the interview with more than just a little arrogance. She didn‟t allow me to make a single point without letting me know that she “already knew that”…even though she was furiously scribbling notes the whole time. She reminded me of a vulture -- just perched there -- waiting to verify that she really didn‟t “need” to speak to me . She was a “taker” who had no interest in making the interview a win-win situation. I wrapped up the interview and felt like I‟d been taken advantage of. That single experience has made me much more cautious. Your experts are most likely doing the same. Give them a reason to say “yes”. 72
So if an expert hesitates when you offer to interview them, it‟s possible they‟ve had a bad interview – a bad experience. It‟s up to you to make it a tho ught-provoking and enjoyable experience for all involved.
Be Fluid and Aware WARNING: An interview with a top-tier expert can make or break you. If you don‟t do it well, you‟ll lose stature. The flip-side also holds true if you‟re able to pull off an e ngaging Intimate Interview. Do the Research
If at all possible, speak to someone who knows the expert – a secretary, a friend, etc…. They may be able to give you some interesting tidbits about that expert. What are some of their former occupations – hobbies – life experiences? Just a few simple facts are enough. You want to keep some surprises for the interview. If you can tap into these early in the interview process, it‟ll get their engine running right away. You now have them paying attention to you and out of the “Here I go…another boring interview” mindset. As an example…
I happened to learn that one of my clients was an avid animal rights activist. When I brought that up at the beginning of the interview, I learned he was currently involved in a large campaign to end bullfighting. It clearly was a passion of his. It got our interview off to a great start, and I found his views highly interesting. As we were getting ready to wrap up the interview, he delayed some real estate investors in order to spend more time in conversation with me. THAT is a sign of a connected Intimate Interview!
By doing your homework, you may find some unique traits or interests of theirs. At the same time, be sensitive to information which they may not have wanted to share, or could potentially be embarrassing.
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So what happens if…
I have an inter view that I just can’t pass up but don’t have much knowledge about the subject matter. This may occasionally happen. It‟s not the ideal situation but you can still mak e it work. Let‟s say that you‟re set up to interview a bass fishing expert – but you‟re not a bass fisherman.
What do you do? You interview one or two bass fishermen first. Create a connection, understanding and empathy for that Target Audience. You‟ll get to understand the struggles, the questions, and the nuances of the questions that they‟d love to ask an expert. Keep your ears tuned for the “language” they use. “Shad..bream…l argemouth.” If you become familiar with the common terms, your inter view will flow much more smoothly. TIPS FOR INTERVIEWING EXPERTS
Be authentic and sincere Develop your listening skills Prepare for the interview Keep the objective in mind Write down potential questions as a guideline – not a map Gain permission to ask one more question at the end of the interview Review your recorded interviews – what did you do well…not so well
Notes:
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Interviewing the Experts It‟s best to interview experts in a niche that you are “into”. The rapport and comfort level will come quickly, because you‟re both passionate and knowledgeable on that particular subject. You‟ll be better in the interview when you have your own “need to know”. When doing research on the expert, realize there‟s a big difference between being “in the know” and “knowing too much” about the person. Give yourself some room to be pleasantly surprised by some aspects of their business or personality.
Allow experts to be the authority, but subtly let them know that you have your own knowledge in that area as well. How? When asking for an interview, Preface it with an authentic compliment Make a specific reference to the information that you like Let them know what you want to know more about. Example: “I really love the model you us e for creating viral SEO traffic. It appears amazingly simple, but must have taken you a while to figure it out. Would you allow me to interview you about that?” That real- life authenticity shows that you are into it… you're not just "doing an interview"
Also, give them a reason to say yes! Let them know this isn‟t going to be a “typical” interview. “I promise this will not be a lame Q & A session. It will be an intimate experience. We're both going to learn something during this time.”
Do NOT interview when you‟re bored with a topic. It can‟t help but show. When listening to my interviews with the Experts --Alan Forrest Smith, Brian Keith Voiles, Robert Stover and Trey Smith -- notice the more conversational tone we have. They‟re willing and eager t o share insights on their chosen fields.
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More importantly… These are subjects I can‟t get enough of myself! We already have established common ground before going into the interview.
Use those interviews as examples of using tone of voice to build momentum. Mirror their speech patterns and tone to build rapport
In order to build or add momentum during the interview, take your tone about ½ notch higher than theirs. Be sure to reflect enthusiasm in your voice when they‟ve said something you appreci ate. One thing to be conscious of is that they may have done many interviews around the same subject matter and have a rhythm to their interviews. We need to give them promotional value in exchange for their time. Also, we‟re looking for something deeper – more revealing than their standard, canned presentation. This can be done by using the Intimate Interviews techniques.
You’ve practiced, become fluid and have an Expert interview lined up -- now what? Interview experts on their success, not “How To Get Rich” We all know that success doesn‟t always mean money. There are experts in every niche with varying degrees of income. For example… A top horticulturist doesn‟t earn as much income as a professional athlete, yet the extensive knowledge base is there. They‟re still considered an expert. The depth of the interview is a good reason why it‟s SO important to interview people in a niche you‟re interested in. Your authentic enthusiasm will ignite the conversation. The sharing of ideas and perspective will be appreciated. There’s a perfect time to do an interview
There are a few things to consider before you do an interview. What level are you at, personally? Consider this… When you‟re brand new to a topic -- a newbie -- there‟s a different flow t o the conversation than when you‟re familiar with the in‟s and out‟s of it. So what does that mean as far as your interview? 76
Take into account your audience – your listeners. You should know more than your audience does Otherwise, you‟ll bore them to tears. The basic material may be too low-level for them, unless they‟re also just beginning in the same industry. For instance, let‟s say you‟ve started a DIY (do -it-yourself) site for home owners…but you‟ve only swung a hammer a few times in your life.
Do you suppose an interview with the carpentry expert on how to use a sander will hold the interest of someone who‟s already moved on to building a wrap around porch? It won‟t. They‟ll quickly realize that your information isn‟t relative to them and move on. You need to be at least one step ahead of their learning curve. .
As you become experienced, your interviews become more finely tuned
The more interviews you do on a topic, the more you learn. Your level of knowledge rises significantly. Your ear becomes finely tuned to the interaction from the higher-level experts. You have a good working knowledge of the topic. You‟re now able to allow the experts to speak about something you may already know. The great thing about this is that now you notice the subtleties. While they‟re speaking about something with which you‟re familiar, your mind can attentively listen for the nuances in their voice…that unusual word they just used…the inflection when they speak of their past. Be a detective. You‟re looking for clues especially if you‟re well -prepared. Once you “hear” something that‟s different, bring it back. Many times, the result is something they‟ve never said before…new and provocative material. Tune into the tonality in the expert‟s voice. Chances are they‟ve been allowed to run along the same track of patter. Here‟s what happened to me…
I interviewed a copywriting legend, and it was extremely difficult to break him out of his ingrained habit of providing “sound bites”. He was running along full steam, disregarding my attempts to divert him. Finally he finished his spiel and I was then able to get to the “real” conversation.
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At the end, he happily told me, “This has been most exciting. I love the way you interview!”
The experts have needs Keep in mind that each expert has “promotional needs”. Part of building the EBA is allowing them to feel as if these have been met. After that point, they‟ll be more wiling to give you what you want. Getting that provocative comment
Picking up on the inflection in their voice can take the interview in a whole new direction. Decide if it‟s one that you want to follow. A word of caution… You run the risk of being annoying if you don‟t frame your questions in a softening way…especially if it‟s a sensitive topic for them. Frame your question carefully. Such as… “Well, anybody listening to this is going to be wondering so I need to ask….”
Do not challenge them, or the interview may be over very quickly. Bring up an opposing view without challenging them. You can easily do this by asking a question such as, “So what do you think about________?” Self-deprecating comments Every once in a while, your interviewee will make a comment when they “catch” themselves expressing a trait or habit that others have labeled as unusual.
For example, a self-taught intellectual expert made a comment on his excessive book-reading -- that it was “neurotic”. I turned that around and said that I didn‟t so much see it as neurotic, but passionate. Do you see how that relieves them of feeling like they‟re being judged? The same goes for my interview with Karen, (on one of the included CD‟s). She was starting to go off on her awareness of germs, then stopped. She then said, “I suppose I‟m being a bit much.”
I assured her that perhaps the rest of us should be as concerned as she was. That allowed her license to feel free to be herself.
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This is what is meant by listening and picking up clues…intense listening with empathy. We‟re allowing people the freedom to speak witho ut being judged.
Not only does it improve the interview, but allows for much richer interaction and communication.
The Awkward Moments…how to handle them The occasional awkward moment is going to happen. You may not be able to avoid them completely, but you can be prepared on how to deal with them. The interview isn’t going anywhere
You have a feeling of dread. The last few questions have been dead-ends. The answers have been lame – short. The EBA is slipping. You‟re thinking that this interview is dying. Perhaps your questions have caught them off-guard. You‟ve gone into a place where they refuse to follow. It‟s time to back it up. In as gracious a way as possible, go back to an earlier topic that they were excited about. Make a connection. “Earli er you were saying _______ about _______. Did you have any early indications as to the success you‟d achieve with it?” Become familiar with this manual‟s section on Conversation Lifters. These can be used at any time during the interview if you feel the energy level dropping. If that doesn‟t work, refer to your list of back -up questions. As long as it‟s not abrupt, you can take the interview in another direction. In order to do so…
Use a softening statement and a directive question that lets them know what you‟re doing. “Now I‟d like to take this in a different direction. You‟ve done some great work with _______.... I‟d love to know more about that.”
Or even, “Since most of the people listening to this are (entrepreneurs, business owners, dog groomers) what could you tell them about ________?”
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Hint: You can sense the interviewee’s discomfort when the answers start getting shorter. You can either change your approach when you notice this happening, or dig into the EBA if you feel there’s a r eal gem – a provocative statement – behind it. What if they cry or get emotional?
This is not planned, and can take you by surprise. Your interviewee may get emotional. The time it happens is typically 30 - 40 minute into the interview…when the level of trust has been attained. The guard is down. They‟re connected. Keep in mind that it isn‟t your fault. You touched on a sensitive area in their lives. There should be no regrets on either side.
Acknowledge the fact in a soft way. Then use a bridge from where you‟re at to a safer ground if necessary. Offer to pause. I had an experience where I asked an expert about his motivation and drive… and if it was tied to a specific event in his past that we’d been discussing….he went silent. I asked, “Are you still there?” When he replied, his voice was cracking, so I knew that I’d hit a nerve . I offered to pause the interview, but he said “No, just give me a moment.” He did bring himself out of it, but the next few minutes were undeniably awkward.
A good interviewer constructs the safety net. There has to be an element of security in the environment you‟ve created during the interview. In order for that sensitivity to be triggered, there has to have been some kind of “lowering of the wall” . A feeling of refuge where it‟s ok to be more vulnerable. They’re annoyed…
You caught them off-guard with a comment. Taken them in a direction they don‟t want to go. To handle this, go back to the topic that they were excited about. Did they use interesting or provocative words to describe something? Did you feel there was more to an answer that could be explored? Or you could even find out the history behind a particular achievement. Try to salvage what you can. 80
If your Expert has a large ego…little patie nce Occasionally, you‟ll run across an expert who is quite taken with him or herself. What this means is that you can‟t be too casual at the start of the interview. Ask them if you can call them by their first name, or if they‟d prefer their more formal title (Dr., Mr, Ms, etc) Do your homework to show them you know “who” they are.
Be respectful but still be natural. Use humor only if it pertains. Be your authentic self. The Expert isn’t familiar with a topic you bring up
This can create a loss of momentum to the interview. By doing homework ahead of time, you‟ll be able to avoid this type of landmine. Once you realize it‟s a dead -end, back off and take it another direction without making the expert feel inadequate.
Ask questions that show they have valuable information to share
Begin the interview with easy questions. Refer to the Rapport-Building section. Some people will ease into it quickly, others will take a bit more time. Your goal at this point is to…
Raise their comfort level Reaffirm that there is value to their information Increase their confidence levels by displaying their knowledge Begin your understanding of their mindset Create connection When interviewing an Expert, don‟t assume you don‟t need to boost their confidence. They also need to feel your genuine interest in what they have to say.
Generate questions for experts based on their area of expertise
These will be very specific to them and their field of expertise.
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Let‟s say you‟re interviewing a women‟s soccer player. The questions you‟ll be asking will vary from those you would ask a naturopath.
But, the categories for these questions would be the same. Such as…
Experience – What is something they‟ve changed Regrets - Something they wish they hadn‟t spent time on Perception – What does it really take? Advice – What are suggestions for a novice to speed up his learning curve? Ask questions with strategic intent!
The Expert-Directed Interview You may come across a top-tier expert with a very strong agenda who‟s used to getting his or her way. Though these people are prime interviews, it can turn into a verbal wrestling match…or a power struggle. Example: I interviewed a world-renown icon in the personal-development field. The end result was to be a promotional marketing piece for his organization. Throughout the interview, he was aggressively running through his own conversation. My attempts to slow him down or divert his patter were largely being ignored. A man of very high intelligence, he was used to imposing his own pattern on any conversation. It was like trying to stop a runaway train. My initial attempts to back him up on a subject were useless…so I let him go.
It was only when I felt that the EBA had been built up enough that I could really try to put the brakes on him. Several times I tried. He wasn’t having any of it. Finally, I yelled, “HOLD ON!!!” and laughed. That got his attention. (though I don’t recommend that approach until you’re highly skilled)
We were then able to progress through the rest of the interview in a more relaxed manner and he allowed me to get some rather interesting and provocative material from him. 82
The interview turned out well and was enjoyed by both of us. The following day, I got an email from the expert ’s marketing manager…
“(Expert) was very impressed about the depth of the interview - he asked a lot of questions about you.” I was able to construct a win-win situation out of something that was clearly headed down a one-way street.
Expert Interview “Don’ts” Don’t ask a question with the wrong intention – don‟t try to annoy them or “stump” them Don’t have scripted comments – it‟s not authentic and it‟s easily detected Don’t slow the momentum by dealing with contact details, etc. Save it for the end. Don’t steal their thunder. Their EBA may not recover.
Example: I was interviewing a millionaire, and he was trying to make the point that people tend to only remember the #1 person in any area. He asked me who the #2 golfer in the world was, and I knew the answer. It completely destroyed the point he was trying to make and I had to work at getting the EBA built back up. Notes:
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Strategic Questions For Experts Modify these to fit the type of individual and niche. Make them more specific. Team them up with a Directive or Secondary question to get the best material. Experience
What have you done to get to where you are now? Have you taken missteps along the way, and how have you learned from them? What wouldn‟t you do now that you d id before?
Was there a turning point decision for you? What was that? What circumstances helped create the opportunity? At start-up, what is something creative you did to lower costs? What steps have you take to achieve ___? How did you know to do that? Create 3 of your own Experience questions you‟d like to ask an expert
1) 2) 3) Regret
Looking back, what would you do differently? Have you gambled and lost? What did you learn? Is there something you wish you had done that you didn‟t?
What was your most expensive mistake? Create 3 of your own Regrets questions you‟d like to ask an expert?
1) 2) 3) 84
Perception
What does it really take? What has been easier/more difficult than you expected? Besides perseverance, positive thinking and never quitting, what would you say is the number one personality trait to develop? What‟s the one thing you seemed to “just figure out” as you went along?
What changes do you foresee in ______? How does your vision differ from other people‟s? Create 3 of your own Perception questions you‟d like to ask an expert 1) 2) 3)
Advice
What would be your number one shortcut? What is your advice to a novice hoping to reduce the learning curve? Besides setting goals, learning time management skills and ______, what is the best activity/thing you would recommend we get better at? Create 3 of your own Advice questions you‟d like to ask an expert
1) 2) 3)
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Other questions to ask an expert “In all successes there are circumstances – there are variables. What is one of the things that has happened to you…opportunities you have created around “unique circumstances”? It‟s something that could only have happened due to a certain chain of events…” “Besides setting goals, learning time manag ement skills and ________,what is the best activity/thing you would recommend we get better at?”
Use the following as idea-generators for questions along with Directive Questions and Secondary Questions. Fine-tune them for your expert. -
What does it take to be a success (indirect compliment)
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The best decision you‟ve made
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A decision you wish you hadn‟t made. What did you learn from that?
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Something you‟d like to learn
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A challenge in your life
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A miracle you‟d like to see happen
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A person who motivates you
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The best piece of advice you received
Notes:
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***SPECIAL NOTE: This is a highly advanced technique – not to be used early in your interviewing experience.
The Predetermined Set-Up This is a sometimes risky strategy to use, but can yield provocative material. Keep in mind that this is done with the best of intentions, not to stir up hard feelings. Think of something you want to know – ask – or get out of the interview. You‟re going to know ahead of time what it is you‟d like to have hap pen. From that, you‟re going to ask – say – do – something early in the interview that will potentially create an opportunity.
The Set-Up is all about warming up the predetermined question, comment or topic. The warmer it is, the better chance of a response. Though there‟s no guarantee that we‟ll get a response…it just gives us a bit more of an edge if it is to happen. The Emotional Bank Account comes into play, in that it is a form of the Set-Up as well. Your accompanying question or comment is a complement to the EBA. The Predetermined Set-Up is the ULTIMATE payoff –but you should be skilled at asking the basic Digging Questions before attempting this. The Digging Questions will lower the EBA, so you need to be comfortable and familiar with how to increase it as well. There‟s a risk that the EBA may not recover fully from asking a Set-Up question. It‟ll take courage to ask this type of question.
Steps to Follow
1. Predetermine the provocative comment, gold nugget or outcome.. 2. Prepare the predetermined question or comment. 3. Look for an authentic compliment or other relevant reference. 4. Remember to look for associated “like” provocative comments – gold nugget – or results from another connected person who you‟ve interviewed. 5. As usual, work at increasing EBA. 6. Look for the opportunity to ask your predetermined question/comment. 87
7. Don‟t be too attached to it. This should flow within the interview as seamlessly as possible and not be out of sync. Be conscious about seizing the opportunity. Example #1
When you first get on the phone, you may ask a question/comment relative to somebody/another expert you may want to use as a point of reference later in the interview. Reference that person in passing. “I notice that you were working with _____ on the _ _____ project. I was intrigued by the way the two of you _________.” This enables you to refer back to that person at some point. It won‟t be “cold”. For example, If you‟d like for your name to be passed along to them for a future interview, you‟ve alread y made mention of their name.
Example #2
During an interview, I had an expert say something positive, as well as negative, about another expert. As it turned out, I was given the opportunity to interview the expert who was spoken negatively about. Of course, this creates a tremendous opportunity for a provocative moment…as well as an opportunity to dramatically lower the EBA. I go into this interview knowing that if I can get the EBA high enough, I‟ll ask this expert what he things about the comments (both positive and negative) To set this up, I‟ll make a comment about the positive comment made. This will be done early in the interview. Then, use the Intimate Interview process to build the EBA. Once again, I‟ll reference the positive comment -- then gracefully also bring up the negative comment.
The best outcome will be that the expert makes a positive comment then make a negative one as well. Again, I‟ll only do this if it‟s done good -naturedly…not to start a fight. I‟m just looking for an unusual, atypical comment that will make this a rare interview. Example #3
I interviewed a millionaire with a diverse portfolio of ventures. The greatest jewel I can get from him is a stock tip. 88
Early in the interview, I compliment him on his success in the stock market. Also, (if it‟s true) I‟ll bring up that another expert gave me a similar piece of information. This helps it seem more “normal” to pass along this type of stock tip. During the interview, I‟ll be looking for opportunities, once the EB A is high, to ask specifically what was the last stock he invested in. Consider that it‟s already been “framed” as a normal occurrence by another expert. (a mild form of peer pressure) I‟ll only ask him if it works or flows into the rest of the interview. This is information he holds tightly, and wouldn‟t normally give away. By bringing up the topic early, I‟ve helped him warm up to the idea.
My authentic compliment early in the interview makes my question not so “cold”. It‟s going to pause him whenever I do ask him. The EBA needs to be high at the right time. Most of all, keep it a win- win situation. It’ll be memorable, enjoyable and help create lasting relationships.
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EXPERT INTERVIEW WORKSHEET What questions could you ask an expert?
1)
2)
3)
4)
5)
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Wrapping Up The Interview Become proficient with graciously closing the interview. Have an exit strategy in place. Before you exit an interview… ALWAYS ASK THIS ONE VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION… “Is there anything else?” This can prompt them to dump some very rich material that they‟d been holding back.
Then wrap it up. Feel free to use any variation of these options: I want to thank you very much. This was good, as I would have expected. Thank you!” I wouldn‟t mind if you would read through my site…if you have something nice to say about me, I‟d love to include it. Unless you have anything else to add, I‟m going to thank you for your time and let you get back to (whatever they may have mentioned they were doing earlier)
Genuine compliment – You are an underground copywriting secret! I can‟t thank you enough for doing this interview and confirming for me and a lot of other people that what we‟re doing is extremely valid. I‟m grateful for the opportunity t o have spoken to you and shared some insights. Thank you.
Thanks for shining a light on how we can do it different. You‟ve been absolutely brilliant! Thank you for your time. I truly appreciate your insights. Thanks again. Specifically for a client or client’s customer: I‟m going to send an email to you. Any thought that comes to you, feel free to email it on over. I really appreciate your time. There‟s one more story. One more opinion. One more very valuable insight.
In essence, an interview that may have appeared to be over still has ten minutes left. This last ten minutes might contain one of the richest pieces of material from the interview
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Example: On Disc 1, you’ll hear what is most likely one of the most challenging interviews I’ve ever done. Even the smallest piece of information was tough to extract.
I was certain the interview was over. Needing to regroup my thoughts, I asked the subject, “Is there anything else?” The effect was immediate. He began churning out great content. Just asking that single question elevated the material in the interview from “substantial” to “rich and rewarding”. NOTES:
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Set up: Disc 8
Effective Interview Techniques If you’re not using these techniques, you’re conducting a lame Question and Answer session You‟ll be able to provide great interviews by embedding these techniques.
Set a Comfortable Tone
Begin the interview with easy questions. Refer to the Rapport-Building section. Some people will ease into it quickly, others will take a bit more time. Your goal at this point is to…
Raise their comfort level Reaffirm that there is value to their information Raise their confidence levels by displaying their knowledge Begin your understanding of their mindset Create connection - When interviewing an Expert, don’t assume that this isn’t a necessary step. They also need to feel your genuine interest in what they have to say. Be Present This sounds simple enough, right? But just being a willing ear isn‟t enough. You need to allow people to speak – be themselves. In one particular interview, the woman actually said, “You might think I‟m a freak…” when speaking about her concern with germs. What she was really saying was “Are you comfortable with this conversation?”
What did I do? I supported her opinion – made her right. I said, “I don‟t think you‟re a freak at all. I just think you‟re very aware and the rest of us should be as well.” What happened next was…
She dumped even more and really got on my side.
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If you can learn how to interpret people…become aware…then you‟ll be successful. It‟s all about…
Really listening Reading between the lines Knowing how to direct it Realize that when he/she says ___________, then what they‟re really saying is _________. If it‟s something positive, magnify it. If it‟s an objection, overcome it If it‟s a question, clarify it.
Long Pauses
Pauses are part of natural conversation, but may seem uncomfortable during an interview. These lapses may occur for a number of reasons. You should anticipate lulls during the interview. For the times when it‟s moving slow, it‟s okay to ask a question here just for the sake of keeping it going. But that being said… Once you start unearthing information in an interview, it‟s likely that you‟ve dug into uncharted territory. The interviewee may need time to find the necessary descriptions. Pauses allow them the opportunity to verbalize their emotions and reactions.
Give them as much as 15 - 30 seconds. Especially if was a potent comment. You may want to throw in a "huh" or a "very good" if the silence feels off. But that's it. Let it go back into silence. Again, be sure you‟re not communicating anything other than empathy. Something may be brewing on the other end. 90% of the time, this gives the person a chance to breathe…let something surface…give their thoughts a chance to see the light of day. This method often releases an avalanche of emotional or deeper hindsight material. A little bit of silence from you can encourage them to explore more indepth emotions or insight. Also, it keeps the interview from feeling rushed. Getting comfortable with this comes with experience. You‟ll see that pauses will happen and that it's fine. 94
Go ahead -- allow yourself that few seconds of silence to collect your own thoughts -- to come back with another question. You will be surprised how quickly an interview can open up if you just "hang in there long enough. That said an interview should rarely be longer than an hour and to many of these pauses can be detrimental. The pauses that you‟ll want to have questions prepared for are more likely at the start of the interview when it's still a little cold.
Example: Disc 8 – Brian Keith Voiles
15:50Thought provoking question: “Is there a copywriting principle, or practice, that is touted as being good that you don’t agree with”
Then “huh” “Well, you know we’re all in different places. Even the formula stuff I hate. (then hopefully sa ys) I could rail on swiping a bit.” I said: “Go! That’s a favorite topic of mine…”
It gives Brian license to dump at this point. Softening Statements and Getting Permission Let‟s say you have your interview subject into the flow of the conversatio n. They‟re willing to give up good information, but you‟re sensitive to the fact that a blunt question would dampen their enthusiasm.
This is the time to use softening statements. Example: “That’s well said! I’m anxious to hear, Robert, if you’re willing…and if you’re not I completely understand. You said that…” Ask for permission and soften those tougher questions. Sample softening statements Do you mind if I ask… Please allow me to ask you… If you‟d be so kind as to answer this… It‟s okay to take a moment before you answer…. 95
Keep in mind this is a strategic conversation, not an interrogation. Real Life Tidbit During an interview with a prospective customer for an Internet Marketing program, I wanted to hear (in his own words) how he would describe the sales funnel for an online business.
When I first asked him, he went off on a tangent about Internet Marketing in general – didn’t really answer my question. I let him run with it though, then brought the question up again.. “Please be patient with me, I’m going to dig here a bit. All of what you just said is great, but getting back to the sales funnel – in your own words how would you define it?” He went off again – this time on what he didn’t like about Internet Marketing in general – still didn ’t provide me with an answer. He was giving me great information, but not his definition of the “online sales funnel”. I had to try a third time, but I knew he would feel a bit “pushed”. This was definitely going to lower his Emotional Bank account. It really would need to be softened even more. “I know this is redundant, I hope you won’t mind, but could I ask you to define the sales funnel? I really want to see how you would word it. Do you mind?”
I got permission to ask one last time. He still did feel a bit pushed, but what he gave me was gold! Keep it Flowing Having the interview “flow” is extremely important. As long as you‟re getting good material, don‟t abruptly insert topics you may have on your list. Stay in the flow. Get what you‟re going to get. If you get the change at the end of the interview to ask more pointed questions, do so.
Example: I interviewed a designer who had been on HGTV. The interview was going exceptionally well, and I was fine not to bring up that detail within the conversation. Doing so would have derailed the interview into a venue that wasn’t pertinent to me.
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Be aware of your own “reactions”
Not everyone you interview will have the same personality. For this reason, you‟ll need to adapt to the person you‟re spea king with. Reserved, analytical people prefer low-key, intelligent confirmations, or responses to their comments. Getting too excited while interviewing this type of person can make them uncomfortable. Referring back to my interview with David the inventor, I got too excited when he finally divulged a valuable piece of information. It made him uncomfortable, and he backed up a step. His emotional energy went down. I worked at getting him back with me by going back into an intellectual mode. I knew we were back on solid ground when he said, “I love you Canadians!” after asking where I lived. Yet on the other hand, his secretary proved to be the emotional type. With her, I was able to express appropriate enthusiasm. In fact, the following section applies directly to interviewees just like her. Allow them to lead…for a while Some people will take a subject and run with it. They‟re “dumping” information on you, which may or may not be relevant to the interview. Allow them to get it out of their system. Because of this, they‟ll have a renewed sense of appreciation for you when you gently guide them back into the interview. If you have a subject who wants to expound on a subject, but you don‟t allow her the opportunity, she may lead every question back to that issue. It‟s possible that very few people are willing to listen to her on a particular subject. Let her run with it, and listen attentively. You‟ll build up a large amount of emotional credit.
Tip: While your interviewee is “dumping” their initial baggage, you may want to write a note as to the point that you really wanted to capture so it isn’t forgotten.
Still, you need to find the balance between the unloading of their ideas and emotions, and transitioning them back into the conversation. You‟ll figure out what surface stuff can be let go. Once it‟s passed, then the real material comes out. You‟re just waiting to get to that richer substance.
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Help them achieve confidence
To reiterate, view people without judgment. There may be instances during an interview when you can express this. They may state something like, "You must think I'm crazy/a bit much/too extreme or something’s wrong with me."
Again, a bit of empathy will help ease them into a secure comfort level. Show your interest and validate their emotions. Let them know that they are more aware than the average person in regards to that particular issue and pay attention to what is important. Make them feel comfortable in your presence. Do it in a genuine, caring way. Dig deeper on abstract statements
If a statement is made that is interesting or unique, follow up on it. This type of exploration may lead to a bigger picture, and a new realization of what is important to the target market. Explore their tangents, and figure out how it ties into their emotional triggers. After all, it‟s their opinion, not yours, that matters. In Summary…
The most valuable asset you can bring to the interview process is an empathetic attitude and a genuine desire to get to know your subject‟s perceptions, feelings and emotional hot buttons. This is best accomplished by leaving your own predispositions aside, which may not be an easy thing to do. Be cognizant of what questions to ask during the various levels of emotion. Tune in to what people are NOT saying. Follow your instincts. Dig for the deeper meaning.
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Advanced Intimate Interview Techniques “NOT” Questions
Find the compelling story – motivating desires – hidden objections. “Not” questions are a powerful way to gai n valuable insights, as well as help frame questions. “Not” questions aren‟t typical in most interviews, so it may help to get a unique and provocative answer. Your subject will most likely pause and think before answering.
In my Indirect Persuasion piece, I talk about “Not Statements” used in copy. With a “Not” statement, the reader is told directly that there is a difference between Product A and Product B. More importantly, it indirectly suggests that Product B is inferior because it doesn‟t have t he same qualities. I apply the same principle for interviewing. With “Not” questions, you can drive a point home, and gently assure your subject that what they have to offer is valuable.
As an example, during an interview with a client you may want t o say something like…. “Let's do this... Could you fill in the blank for me? Unlike my competitors we do not ___________.” What your client says at this point most likely will be “surface” material. You may even already know what they‟re going to say. So now would be a good time to follow up with a qualifying question such as… “I can see that you're quite different from your competition. You don't ___________ or ___________. So... other than what you just said – how else are you different?”
Silence After A Positive Comment If you‟ve just made a positive comment to your interviewee, and they are silent, give them time. Pause. Wait for them to respond so they can take it in and then bring back what was “organic” for them. This type of response is what naturally
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comes up for them -- it‟s what is important to them – that‟s what they need to talk about. Don’t fall into the trap of feeling like you always have to ask questions. If they‟re ready to just take it and go, let them. This ties into the emotional bank account of that person.
Real Life Tidbits Provide Priceless Details
Once the flow of the conversation has been established, you may ask the person for stories regarding their experiences. Stories can give you so much valuable information…Real-life tidbits, a glimpse into their world, a better “feel” for where they‟re coming from. Instead of imparting basic information, people are more likely to reveal subtle “little details” in the framework of a story. Real life tidbit
A Chiropractic patient related how she misaligned the vertebra in her neck while working as a stage hand for a theater group. She provided details about the trip to the hospital…follow -up treatments from the medical doctors that didn’t help the daily pain…as well as the inability to participate in sports or even do chores. Not to mention the endless hassles with the insurance company. The content of this interview was far richer than if the vague, “How did it feel when you got hurt?” was asked. And it‟s these details that will make your writing more honest and real.
Dig Deeper To Hit That Nerve If you‟re sensing a benefit or emotional hot button, but they‟re not getting to it, look for opportunities to prompt them. In a friendly, questioning voice ask, “Well, would you say that….?” If they agree, ask a second question to dig deeper. You want to evoke those deeper emotions. This type of question is specific if you‟re bringing up a difficult topic, trying to evoke a loss they‟re experiencing, but not expressing.
In interviews with arthritis sufferers, I sensed a loss of dignity as the common thread. They had to rely on others to open jars, go up or down steps, or even get in and out of the bath.
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This emotion wasn‟t openly expressed, but I knew it was there. In these interviews, I asked (after getting their Emotional Bank Accounts quite high), “Would you say that there is even a loss of a certain amount of dignity? How do you feel with becoming a bit more dependent on others?”
It struck a nerve with that Target Audience. As another example, I recently interviewed Master Copywriter Terry Dean. He‟d purchased my Best of the Best program, and I knew he‟d have an opinion of me as a coach/teacher. I wanted to know what it was. I sensed he‟d have a positive response, but I softened the question so he‟d feel comfortable answering even if the response wasn‟t so positive. I was searching for genuine feedback, and phrased it as such.
The end result was that I did get feedback, and a topic-specific testimonial from him. Ask For Specific Numbers
Another thing I like to do is ask for a specific number of things. “So, tell me three things that people say about you.” “If you were to define what you do in one sentence, what would it be?”
At this point, your subject will pause. And think. They‟ll come back to you with a thoughtful, original answer. Truly rich material. Keep in mind how each question affects your Emotional Bank Account. Some questions will prove uncomfortable for your subject. If you can feel your credit level dropping because you are probing deeply, keep in mind that if you keep going, you may have no credit left to probe in another direction. Q: “If you don’t mind, can you tell me how much money you lost on this venture?” A: ”…a lot.”
The Emotional Bank Account just experienced a drop. 101
At this point, you'll need to decide if you should back off and explore something else which may be more comfortable for them. Don’t Allow Vague Answers
Be on the lookout for vagueness in your interviewee‟s replies. “Dr. Miller really helped my dog‟s arthritis.” This is a signal that your your questions or conversation aren‟t specific enough. It‟s also a golden opportunity to find out what‟s lying below the surface. Ask a more direct follow-up question such as, “What signs of arthritis did your dog exhibit? How is that different now?” …or even better… ”Can you give me 3 symptoms of your dog‟s arthritis?” Appreciate the answers given. Let your interviewee know that you‟re attentive and their input is extremely worthwhile. Listen with genuine, authentic concern. You may “bring it back” to the topic 2 -3 more times to get to the real answer. Phrases to use in instances like this may be, “Please forgive me for being redundant, but I‟d like to clarify _______.” “I know I‟ve already asked this, but _____________”
Remember…
An Interview is NOT a Question and Answer Period… It’s An Intimate Experience! NOTES:
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ADVANCED INTERVIEWING TECHNIQUES WORKSHEET List 3 benefits of doing an Intimate Interview For the interviewer 1)
2)
3)
For the interviewee 1)
2)
3)
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Preparing For The Interview Warm up-call/set up time
If at all possible, call them yourself to set up a scheduled time as a pre interview strategy. Real life tidbit
David, the inventor, was not my client. He was the inventor of the product that my client was distributing. My client felt like he’d already taken up too much of the David’s time, and didn’t want me to bother him. I felt it was indeed necessary to speak to David directly, but my client wanted to ask the questions himself. At this point, I realized my relationship with my client was still very fragile. Instead of pushing him, I carefully worded this statement, “Here are a couple of key questions questions to ask David. But it would be be even better if I had 15 minutes with him.” In this manner, I was agreeing to go along with 10- 15 his request, but also indirectly letting him know that I could do a much better job for him if I had direct access to the inventor.
My client got the opportunity to look over a couple of key questions. Then he comes back and says, "Shaune, I'm going to be at the office, can you do the interview with David?" You bet. I called David’s office at the appointed time and asked his receptionist to connect me to him. David answers, and I say, “Hi David. It’s Shaune.” …silence….. He had no idea of who I was and the reason for my call.
I caught him off-guard. He wasn't ready. He wasn't "on." On the Emotional Bank Account scale of 1 to 7, I was starting at a -3. If I had called David‟s office prior to the appointed interview time, we would have begun on a much better note.
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Prepare/Research
Whenever possible, try to get some background information on the person you‟re about to interview. This might only take 5 -10 minutes to read, but can provide valuable insight. Be especially tuned in to areas where you can start digging for information you are looking for. If you are interviewing a business owner or product developer, there should already be some copy material available, most likely on their website or promotional materials. When interviewing your client's customers, ask your client for a little background information on them. Find out why he selected them to be interviewed. Arrange compensation (if necessary ) If interviewing customers for a client, most of your interviewees won‟t be “paid” for their services. They‟re doing it as a favor of sorts.
But if your client really wants to pay the people for their time… If the person you are interviewing knows they are receiving $50 for the time they spend with you, they may be even more forthcoming, and willing to cooperate. You may find it easier to get an “OK” to use their signatures and testimonials. In this case, there are a few necessary steps to you‟ll want to follow.
Have your client set up the agreement ahead of time. Don‟t get in the middle of this. Your client has already built a relationship with this person – let HIM make the agreement. (I recommend $50, or equivalent in product, for a 30-60 minute call, with the client paying for it in most cases.) Ask that payment be made AFTER the interview. The truth is, paying in advance dilutes the enticement. Often, people have already spent the money by the time you do the interview and thus the value is already gone. Don‟t give them the reward before they‟ve done the work! Preliminary Contact
You need to begin the interview at a Level 3 or 4. To do this, put some time into setting it up. Preparation for an interview is essential. Define your own goals for the interview. What information are you trying to find? Be specific. 105
After your client has provided you with the names and phone numbers of people to interview, call and set up times with these people. Don't expect them to be immediately available. Call them, and ask for a good time to talk. Try to cater to their schedule. Give them specifics such as the potential length of the interview, and the types of questions you may be asking. Also, find out what their schedule is like. If it's a choice between interviewing them… a. On their cell phone. b. At their work. c. At their home in the evening… Obviously C is the best choice. B is the next-preferred option. Real life tidbit
I just got off the phone with one of my client's staff members who called back to arrange an interview. I asked which time was good for her, and her response was, "Oh, I'm flexible!" I cringed . Don‟t take such a statement literally. Get an exact time and day that would work best for them. At what time are they most available and relaxed enough to give you the time you need?
ALWAYS give them a reminder phone call or email the day before the scheduled interview. When you call, be sure to introduce yourself properly. Give your full name, and let them know on whose behalf you‟re calling. Something to the effect of: “Hi, this is (your name). I‟m calling on behalf of Mr. Snyder and XYZ Cleaning Company. He said you‟d be willing to speak to me regarding your experience with his company, XYZ Cleaning.” Keep the questions simple…
1. What's your occupation? 2. What do you enjoy about your job? 3. How long have you been a customer of XYZ Cleaning? My experience has found that most people are a little nervous when you first contact them. Ease them into the conversation.
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Encourage them. You‟re asking for their opinions. It‟s not a test. There are no right or wrong answers.
Leave your phone number in case their schedule changes. Even when you call at the appointed time, ask if it‟s still a good time to talk. Taking a few minutes with this step before the actual interview will help it proceed much more smoothly. Persist in getting the interview
It happens. You may not hear back from the person right away to set up a time for the interview. This doesn‟t mean that they‟re not willing to speak to you. In most cases, they probably have other things going on, as we all do. They may intend to return your call, put it off, and forget about it. Give people 48 hours to respond. After that, call again. After several attempts, move onto another person to interview. Asking for more sources
Listen to see if there are other key people mentioned that you could interview. Often, a client will mention another person who may have a better view on the matter. Or they may even know of another client who has a great story. Ask your client for more people to interview than you really need. Not everyone will be amenable to donating their time for this purpose. If you think you only need two interviews, ask for three leads. You can always go through the process of interviewing, and then decide if you really need that third person. Follow-Up
Leave your phone number and email, in case they think of anything else to share. Reassure them you want to know when they come up with new or different information. One of my coaching students interviewed a 65 year-old lady (customer of his client). Her memory wasn't the best, and would every few days call back with 107
more information. Always good stories. She'd be at home, recall more use tidbits, and call. Also, you‟ll have more questions upon reviewing your interviews afterwards. At the end of the interview, ask the person how they prefer to be contacted in the event you have a few more questions. They‟ll never deny you that information, especially if you‟ve done your job and established rapport. At the very least, get their email address and send them a “thank you” for their time.
In that email, you may want to remind them that they can call you ev en though the official interview is done in case they come up with additional insights. Many times, these secondary insights can prove worthwhile.
Don’t have just a Q & A session.
Instead, it should be a rewarding experience for everyone involved. Learn how to do an interview that will prompt your subject to thank you for it ! Actual Email from an Interviewee:
Hi Shaune, I wanted to thank you for the interview Wednesday evening. You are a very talented interviewer. (Op rah…Barbara Walters…Shaune Clarke…) and I really enjoyed our talk. I hope it was productive for you and your clients as well. I mentioned to Allen that I had a few revelations about what makes me tick, which made it all the more worthwhile for me. Thanks for a lively and enriching experience. All the best, Trish
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