"Threading her stores together ke a master weaver, Donoghue takes the reader deeper and deeper nto the tapestry of KG THE WTH A masterl gorgeous and wckedy we wrtten book. -Francesca La Block author of WTZE BT
US $14.95 I 2000 CAN ISBN 0-060275758
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Kissing the Wich: Old Tales in New Skins Copyright © Emma Donoghue, 1997 Al rghts reserved. No part of his book may e used o repo dued in any manner whatsoever without written permisson except in the case o brief quotations emodied in critica aicles nd reviews. Printed in the United Stes of Ameria. For information address HrperCollins Children's Books, diision of HarerColins Publishers, 10 Eas 53rd Street, New York NY 0022 First pulished in the U.K. y Hamish Hamilton Ld brary o Congress Cataloging-inPubication Da Donoghue Emma 1969 Kissing the wtch : od ales in new skins Emma Donoghue. m. p. "] oanna Coer Books Summary A collection o hrteen interconnected stories that give old iry tles a new wis. ISBN 0-06027575-8. SBN 0-06027576-6 (lib. dg.) I. Fary tles, Engish. [1. Faiy tales. I T ie PZ8.D73Ki 1997 964465 [Ficdc21 CP AC Desgned y Chrsine Kettne 4 6 7 8 9 10 2 irst Amerian Edition
WM
I wat to thak Roisi Coroy of Attic Press for promptig me to write fairy tales, Siobh Parkiso for suggestig the theme of The Tale of the Cottage, ad my aget Carolie Davidso ad her ap pretice aah J acobmeyer for helpl criticism Kissing the Witch has beeted greatly from readigs ad coversatios with Jaie Buchaa, Aliso Dickes, Amy Gamble, Lara A. Kig, Grie i Dhill, Ua Dhubhghaill, Paulia Palmer, Sady Reeks, Chris Roulsto, Sue alker ad Debra estgate I would also like to thak audieces i glad, Irelad, Scotlad ad the Uited States for listeig so resposively to these tales
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Frane,
my mother and frt tortelle who read me Andrew Lang' "Pinkel and the With more time than he an bear to remembe thi book i dediated with gratitude and love.
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THE TALE OF THE SHO E
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THE TALE OF THE IRD
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THE TALE OF THE ROSE
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THE TALE OF THE APPLE
43
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THE TALE OF THE HANDKERCH EF
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61
THE TALE OF THE HAR
3
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THE TALE OF THE ROTHER
13
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THE TALE OF THE SP INST ER
17
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THE TALE OF THE C OTTAGE
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THE TALE OF THE SKN
14
THE TALE OF THE NE E DLE
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THE TALE OF THE OCE
167
� t. THE TALE OF THE KISS
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came t was all col ver sce my mother e the feather be felt har as a stoe oor very wor that came out of my mouth lmpe away lke a toa hatever put o my back ow ture to sackcloth a chafe my ski hear a kockg i my skull, a kept rug to the oor but there was ever ayoe there. he ays passe lke ust brushe from my gers scrubbe a swept because there
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was othig else to do raked out the hearth with my gerails, ad scoured the loor util my kees bled. couted grais of rice ad divided brow beas from black obody made me do the thigs did, obody scolded me, obody puished me but me The shrill voices were all iside. Do this, do that, you lay heap of dirt They kew every questio ad aswer, the voices i my head Some days they asked why I was still alive. I listeed out for my mother, but I could't hear her amog their clamor. Whe everythig that could possibly be doe was doe for the day, the voices faded kelt o the hearth ad looked ito the scarlet ciders util my eyes swam. I was tryig to picture a ture, suppose Some ights I told myself sto ries to make myself weep, the stroked my ow hair till I slept Oce, out of all the times whe ra to the door ad there was obody there, there was still obody there, but
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the stranger was behind me thought for a moment she must have come out of the re er eyes had ames in their centers and her eyebrows were sivered with ash The stranger said my bac must be tred and the sweeping coud wat She too me nto the garden and showed me a haze tree had never seen before began to as uestions but she put her tiny nger over my mouth so we coud hear a dove murmuring on the highest branch t turned out that she had nown my mother when my mother was ave She sad that was my mothers tree ow can begin to descrbe the transformatons? My od dusty sef was spun new This woman sheathed my imbs n bue vevet was dancing on points of cear gass And then because ased she too me to the ba snt that what girs are meant to as for? er carriage brought me as far as
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the palace steps I new just how I was meant to behave. I smiled ever so pret tily when the great doors swung wide to announce me I resed a canap and ept my belly pulled in. Under the thousand crystal candelabras I danced with ten elderly gentlemen who had nothing to say but did not let that stop them I answered only Indeed and Oh yes and Do you thin so? At ten to twelve I came down the steps and she swept me away ad enough? she ased liing a har o my long glove But she was old enough to be my mother and I was a girl with my for tune to mae The voices were begn ning to jabber They each told me to do something dierent Tae me bac to morrow night I sad So she appeared again just when the soup was boiling over and too a silver spoon from her pocet to feed me Our ngers drew pictures in the ashes on the hearth vague shapes of birds and slands She showed me the sparle m my eyes
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how wide my sirt could spread how to waltz without getting dizzy I was lithe in green satn now; my own mother would not have recognized me That night at the ball I got right into the swing of things I tittered at the old ing s joes; I accepted a single chicen wing and nibbled it daintily I danced three times with the prince, whose hand wavered in the small of my bac e ased me my favorite color but I couldnt thin of any e ased me my name, and for a moment I couldnt re member it At ve to midnight when my feet were startg to ache I waited on the bottom step and she came for me On the way home I leaned my head on her narrow shoulder and she put one hand over my ear ad enough? she ased But I didnt have to listen to the baing voices to now how the story went: my future was about to happen Tae me bac tomorrow night I said So she came for me again just when
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the sma sounds of the mce were get ting on my nerves, and she tod me they were coachmen to drive us in state. She caimed her itte nger was a magic wand, it coud do spectacuar things She coud aways mae me augh That night my new sin was red si, shivering in the breeze The prince hov ered at my ebow ie an autumn eaf ready to fa. The musicians payed the same tune over and over I danced ie a cocwor baerina and smied ti my face twisted I swaowed a itte of every thing I was oered, then eaned over the bacony and threw it a up again. I had barey time to wipe my mouth before the prince came to propose Out on the steps he ed me, under the haf moon, a very fairytae is ong moustaches were beginning to trembe; he seemed ie an actor on a creaing stage As soon as the words began to ea out of his mouth, they formed a coud in which I coud see the ture.
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I could hardy hear him. The voices were shrieing Yes yes yes say yes before you ose your chance you bag of nothing ness I opened my teeth but no sound came out There was no harm in this man what he proposed was white and soft comfortabe as fog. There was nothing to be afraid of But just then the midnight bel began to toll out the ong procession of years, palatial day by moonless night And I eapt bac ward down the steps, leaving one shoe behind The bushes tore my dress into the od rags It was perfecty sient on the awn She was waiting for me in the shadows She didnt as had I had enough I had got the story a wrong ow coud I not have noticed she was beau ti? I must have dropped a my words in the bushes I reached out I coud hear surprise on her breath What about the shoe? she ased
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t was digging nto my heel told her What about the prince? she ased e nd someone to t f he loos long enough What about me? she ased very ow m od enough to be your mother er nger was spellng on the bac of my nec Youre not my mother said m od enough to now that threw the other shoe nto the bram bes where t hung glnting So then she too me home or too her home or we were both somehow taen to the cosest thing
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I was as young as you are now I earned how to save my own fe You thin I have saved you but the truth is that your need has conjured me here It was a brd that heped me when I was young but it coud have been anything a stc a stone whatever happened by The thing is to tae your own fe in your hands As a chid I weighed me and did not thin t worth saving Scrubbing the great steps one day I found an od bent
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copper nife n its corroded curve my reecton was barey a thumbna high Now new for sure that was the east thing in the word. The dogs and cats mattered more than did. They had ther paces on the earth they merited their grooming their feeding or ther drowning no one uestioned ther ex istence Whereas was not a necessary anima There was a man had been taught to ca father e saw to the horses n the great stabes their bright mouths and meta chorus his eyes never fe to my eve There was a woman who caed her sef my mother She wore an apron ie a snow coud her hands bushed red as if ashamed coud not magne that had emerged from her substanta esh it seemed more iey that she had found me caught in a cowpat or behind the appe barre or whie ceaning out a mousetrap Once eavesdropping in the aundry heard her te a neghbor that she had spent twenty years pining for a
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child I could hardly have been what she had in mind You must understand, I was not ill treated no one wasted breath i nging insults at my head I did not belong, that was all Nor did anything belong to me; mine was a borrowed life Considering myself as the louse in their bed, the cucoo in their nest, I felt a certain re luctant gratitude for the food and shelter they allowed me I wore scraps of every ones wornout clothing: my shoes were made of the gardeners gloves, my shift from old handerchiefs My names were handmedowns too: girl the creatre or, most often, yo there Every story I ever heard of change lings, babies swapped at birth or aban doned in bulrushes, I repeated to myself at night to glean its secret message But I had no idea how I had drifted into the path of these indierent giants called father and mother, and I did not dare to as Only in the elds did I nd a sense
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of proportion I new we were a euay minute under the iuid eye of the sy and euay precious in its sight I used to sit so sti even the rabbits woud not notice me. Seagus wheeed overhead guping out their hunger Swaows made etters against the sy too brief to read Once I spent a whoe day there a bade of grass in each hand to anchor me to the warm earth I watched the sun rise pass over my head and set. Ladybirds mated on my nuce; a shrew nibbed a hoe in my stocing whie I tried not to augh Such a day was worth any pun ishment. My mother and father beat me when they fet the need but ony by the rue of thumb: thin stics brea no bones. What they wanted I beieve was not to hurt me but to teach me the way things were. he esson was simpe and if I did not earn it had ony mysef to bame he birch pen wrote it often enough on the sin of my bac. Keep your horizons narrow your expectations
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low and you w never be unduy disap pointed Keep your heart innitesimay sma and sorrow wi never spy t never punge never ap away with your heart in her caws So when one spring n spite of a this good advice I fe in ove it fet lie disaster too a tiny bite and it ex poded in my stomach Love spashed through every cranny haued on every musce unoced every joint I was so of astonishment I fet ten feet tal My shoulders tched as if wings might brea through Litte one your sin s so soft said the man as he stroed my chee with one huge thumb I aways started uivering as soon as heard his noc at the door when I opened it and curtsied my nees dipped lie a frogs; his rst smie set me astutter s eyes coudy under biows of bac hair were the ony wea thng about him e could always recogne me by the sound of my breathing
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Once I scrubbed the same corner for three hours and when the man n ay passed I upset my pai of drty suds a down the passage e stepped bac at once but his shny eather shoes had been spattered ie rocs by the seashore I tried to wpe them with my apron but he ied me to my feet Such force in his forearm what an amed bow was hs ebow how decious the arc of his shouder is hands were baced wth a fant bac r e was ie the bouder that parts the river and he smet ie appes stored n darness a winter I who had nothng and no rght to anythng woud have him for my very own And so somehow it came to pass as in the best of stores as in the dream to whch you cing e a torn banet on an icy morning when t is past time to get up My father hs words surred wth suspicon tod me that a great man had ased for me My mother carried in a huge baset of nen and a neede
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Unspeang we began to cut and sew my new ife I woud be a stan on my husbands ine I new that without her teing If t was his whm to stoop to ift me up then I was never to deude mysef that I deserved it I was aways to eep n mnd the tiny smoy mage of what an insigncant creature I had been before he honored me with hs gaze But when I was presented to hm n my new dress he made me forget a my fears e dscovered my hand in my ong seeve and began to count my n gers No sooner had my parents baced out of the room than he was bending over me to sn his face nto my har is whisper boomed what were they to us now or we to them? is ear against my chee gave o a surprisng heat; my nger crawed aong its rred tunnes e a venturesome bee e woud tae me away from a ths he promised gve me a new name never et anything hurt me I began to shudder with peasure
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The morng after our wedding I ay awae beside the hot mountain that was my husband I traced the brown pat tern we had made on the inen: was it a ower a caw a snowae? At ast I decided that it was the sign of two eaves growing round each other I beonged to him now and he to me With surprising ease I earned to rue a house greater than the one I had scrubbed for my eep I new who I was at ast this was what I had been born for I ied to wa through the corridors my train of brocade sweeping the agstones; I found deight in every pane of gass I woud never have to wash When within the month I found I was with chid every mirror seemed to echo my grandeur Shameess I onged for it to show; I wanted to be the shape of an appe or the noontime sun One morning at midsummer I woe eary and thought I woud go out to see the grass grow and the birds rise, as I used to in the days when it was my ony
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consoation ow dierent I was now how I had grown rich in things of the spirit and esh how my sin fet taut as a tambourine And then my husband peered seepiy over his shouder and ased where I was going It a made perfect sense the way he expained it to me as I sat on the edge of the bed: the danger of wandering under the scathing sun, the ris of exposure to rough men in the corneds the unsuitabiity of such a thing I nodded, and aughed with him and that morning it was true that I woud rather cimb into the cave of his arms and mysef up with biss again But as my hips widened the great house began to seem too sma I paced the corridors unti I new them by heart I earned every ange of the courtyard In their smooth eather my feet itched for the stubbe of the open eds and my eyes strained for a far horizon I set out again one Sunday when there coud be no men in the e ds but 1 9
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still my husbad said o this time his eyes were a little bewildered I tried agai whe he was away o busiess, but the housekeeper would ot give me the key to ope the gate I seaked o aother day, while he was coutig his moey, ad still he was getle whe they brought me back, though I could see ager stretchig itself betwee his brows Agai, he put it to me i words a child could uderstad e eclosed my two hads i oe of his huge sts, ad kissed the tears from my cheeks I odded I wiped my face I kew 1t was ureasoable to pie so much for a walk i the sushie My husbad laughed softly, ad wodered aloud what a breedig wife would ask for ext to y like a kite, or a fox for a pet, or charcoal to chew o? It was oly the, starig ito the blur of his eyes, that it all became clear to me, ad dread stopped up my mouth Oh, my husbad was o tyrat he would ever sell my jewels, or steal my
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chidren or cut o my head But now I knew that what I wanted was not the same as what he wanted for me What this good man had sworn to protect me from was not the same as what I feared I trusted that he woud never et anything hurt me but he woud never et anything touch me either Summer decined into chiy autumn From my window I coud see restess ocks of birds forming themseves into arrowheads pointing south Sometimes they fatered broke from the shape swung oose ike hai but aways they came back together Day by day my bey sweed with ife but the rest of me was shrinking My husband had taken to referring to me as if I were someone ese ow is my dearest wife today? he woud ask and I woud stare back mutey and think I dont know how is she? Where is she? Who is she? Bring her here so I can ask her how I am to ive this ife One day he found me kneeing m a
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corridor, over a bunde of brown feathers A tiny swaow it must have own down a chimney and battered itsef to death I was sobbng so hard he thought my tme had come; he was stumbng away in search of the midwife when I turned to him and hed out my hands e peered, his face amost touchng the sewed feathers, and for a moment I feared he woud augh, but his face was grave as he rased it toward me My ove, he said, what is a bird to us, or we to a bird? I had no answer to give him When he tried to ift me up I was too heavy for him; my egs were frozen to the ground As I net there, aware of his steps dying away, I fet a tremor under my thumbs When I brought the brd nearer to my face, I coud sense a tny puse Not ute dead, then haay to aive In the wee that foowe d, I fed the britte creature drops of m from my smaest ngertip and ept t warm in my r coar Everything waited I resed
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to thin about mysef my exceptiona for tune my perfect house my exceent hus band who coud mae any woman happy if she et him I simpy waited to see if the bird woud ive One day it swaowed One day it stood One day it ew and the next it got a gimpse of sy and tried to smash through the gass I coud have ept t beside me a sitethered paything but what woud have been the use of that? I too it to the highest window in the house and et it out The ic of its wings was surprisingy strong The air smet ie frost but there was sti time to reach the summer and I stood watch ing the bird whee over the rooftops Fesh weighed me down ie a robe The chid within me was icing, a mute camor for reease Next time Next year I woud get away somehow sometime with or without this chid heading somewhere I new nothing about but that the sun woud shine down on my naed head I woud
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be hurt and woud be ear but woud never be oced up agan My e was n my own hands now beatng anty too sma yet or anyone to notce cupped reedom to my breast woud eed t woud ove t t woud grow bg enough to carry me away he brd crced bac and hovered outsde my wndow or a moment as t had somethng to say
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this life I have nothing to do but cavort on the wind but in my last it was my fate to be a woman was beautil or so my father told me My oval mirror showed me a face with nothing written on it I had suitors aplenty but wanted none of them their doggish devotion seemed too easily won. I had an appetite for magic even then I wanted something improbable and per fect as a red rose just opening Then in a sprng storm my fathers
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shis were ost at sea, and my stors wanted none of me ooked in my mirror, and saw not myself, but every lae 'd never been. The servants were there one day and gone the next; they seemed to melt into the ountryside Last year's leaves and aers bew aross the ourtyard as we aked to go My father ifted heavy trunks till veins embroidered his forehead e found me a banket to wra my mirror in for the ourney. My sisters hed u their ale sleek ngers and omlained to the wind ow ould they be exeted to toil with their hands? tuked u my skirts and got on with it t gave me a strange leasure to see what my bak ould bend to, my arms ould bear t was not that was better than my sisters, only that ould see rther Our new home was a ottage; my father showed me how to nai my mirror to the aking wa There were weeds and grasses but no roses Down by the
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river where ounded my father's shirts white on the blak roks found a kind of eae My hands grew numb and my dark hair tangled in the sunshine was washing my old self away; by midsummer was almost ready My sisters sat just outside the door in ase a rine should ride by The warm breeze arried the oasonal sornl laugh my way. As summer was leaving with the hilly birds my father got word that one of his shis had ome safe to shore after all is ale eyes stood out like eggs What he wanted most he said was to bring us eah home whatever we wanted My sisters asked for heavy dresses lined loaks rtoed boots anything to kee the wind out. knew that nothing ould kee the wind out so asked for a red rose ust oening The rst snow had fallen before my father ame home but he did have a rose for me My sisters waited in the doorway arms rossed ran to greet
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him, this bent bush who was my fathe inhing aoss the white gound took the ose into my hand befoe he ould do it My fathe fell down The etals wee salet behnd thei skin of fost We iled evey blanket we ossessed on to of him; still his temos shook the bed My sistes wet and used, but he ouldn't hea them They ied themselves to slee beside the e That night in his deliium he aved of a blizzad and a astle, a stolen ose and a hooded beast Then all of a sudden he was wide awake e gied my wist and said, Daughte, have sold you The stoy ame wild and oundabout, in dats and uies listened, tting togethe the agged iees of my tue Fo a ed ose and his life and a box of gold, my fathe had omised the beast the st thing he saw when he eahed home e had thought the st thing might be a at e had hoed the st thing might be a bid My heat ounded on the anvil of
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my brestbone. Fther whispered wht does promise men when it is mde to monster? He shut his tremblin eyes t's no use he sd his tonue dry in his mouth. The best will nd us trck us down smell us out no mtter where we run And then wter rn down his cheeks s if his eyes were dissolvin Duhter he sid in voice like old wood brekin cn you ever forive me? could only nswer his question with one of my own. Puttin my hnd over his mouth whispered Which of us would not sell ll we hd to sty live? He turned his fce to the wll Fther sid will be redy to leve in the mornin Now you my tell me tht should hve felt betryed but ws shkin with exctement should hve felt like possession but for the rst time in my life seemed to own myself went s hoste but it seemed s if ws ridin into bttle
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left the rose dryin inst my mirror in cse ever cme home My sis ters onion eyed wtched us eve t dwn They couldn't understnd why my fther crried no un to kill the best To them word ws not somethin to be kept The cstle ws in the middle of forest where the sun never shone Every viler we stopped to sk the wy spt when they herd our destintion There hd been no weddin or christenin in tht cstle for whoe enertion The youn queen hd been exied imprisoned devoured (here the stories divered) by hooded best who could be seen t sunset wlkin on the bttlements. No one hd ever seen the monster's fce nd lived to describe it. We stopped to rest when the liht ws thinnin. My fther scnned the pths throuh the trees tryin to remember his wy. His eyes swiveed like mb's do when the woves re circlin He took deep breth nd ben to spek but sid Hush
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Niht ell beore we reched the cstle but the liht spilli rom the ret doors led us throuh the trees The best ws witi t the top o the steps bck to the liht swddled drk ess stried to see the cotours o the msk imied dieret deor mity or every lyer o blck cloth The voice whe it cme ws ot cruel but horse s i it hd ot bee much used i twety yers The best sked me Do you come coseti? did ws sick to my stomch but did My ther's mouth opeed d shut ew times s i he ws relesi words tht he cold ir swllowed up kissed his ppery cheek d wtched him ride wy. His ce ws lost i the horses me Thouh explored the cstle rom top to bottom over the rst ew dys oud o trce o the missi quee. sted there ws door with my me o it d the wlls o my room were
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white satin There were a hundred dresses cut to my shape. The reat mirror showed me whatever wanted to see had keys to every room in the castle except the one where the beast slept. The r st book opened said in old letters: You are the mistress: ask for whatever you wish didnt know what to ask for had a room of my own and time and treasures at my command had everythin I could want except the key to the story Only at dinner was I not alone The beast liked to watch me eat had never noticed myself eatin before each time swallowed I blushed At dinner on the seventh niht the beast spoke knocked over my lass and red wine ran the lenth of the table I don't remember what the words were The voice came out muled and scratchy from behind the mask After a fortniht we were talkin like the wind and the roof slates the rushes and the river the cat and the mouse. The beast was always courteous
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wondered wht scorn this courtesy veled. The best ws lwys entle; wondered wht violence hid behnd ths entleness ws cold The wnd wormed throuh the shutters ws lonely n ll this estte there ws no one like me But hd never felt so beutil. st in my stnwlled room before the old mirror looked deep nto the pool of my fce nd tried to imine wht the best looked like. The more hdeous my iminins the more my own fce seemed to low Becuse thouht the best must be everythin ws not: drk to my liht rouh to my smooth horse to my sweet When wlked on the bttlements under the wnin moon the best ws the rotesque shdow threw behind me One niht t dinner the best sd You hve never seen my fc e Do you still pcture me s monster? did The best knew it By dy st by the re in my white
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stin room redin tles of wonder There were so mny bo oks on so mny sheves knew could live to be old without comin to the end of them The sound of the pes turnin ws the sound of mic The dry liquid feel of pper under nertips ws wht mic felt like One niht t dinner the best sid You hve never felt my touch Do you sti shrink from it? did. The best knew it At sunset liked to wrp up in rs nd wk in the rose rden The dys were stretchin the liht ws lnerin few minutes loner ech evenin The rosebushes held up their spiked ners inst the yeow sky cin me in One niht t dinner the best sked Wht if let you o? Would you sty of your own free will? would not The best knew it And when looked in the ret old mirror tht niht thouht coud mke out the shpe of my fther lyin with his feverish fce turned o the ceilin
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The book did sy ws to sk for wht ever wnted set o in the mornin promised to return on the eihth dy nd ment it when sid it Tkin leve on the steps the best sid must tell you before you o m not mn knew it Every tle hd ever herd of trolls ores oblins rose to my lips The best sid You do not understnd But ws ridin wy The journey ws lon but my blood ws jnlin bells t ws drk when reched home My sisters were whisperin over the broth My fther turned his fce to me nd ters crved their wy cross it The rose sti inst the mirror ws still red By the third dy he could st up m my rms By the fth dy he ws etin t tble nd pttin my knee On the sev enth dy my sisters told me in whispers tht it would surely kill him if went bck
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to the cstle Now hd pid my rnsom they sid wht could possess me to return to monster? My fthers eyes followed me round the cotte The dys trickled by nd it ws sprin pounded shirts on blck rocks down by the river. felt youn in s if nothin hd hppened s if there hd never been door with my nme on it But one niht woke to nd myself sittin in front of my mirror n its drk pool thouht could see the cstle rden lte frost on the trees blck shpe on the rss found the old ppery rose clenched in my st kin into nothin. This time sked no permission of nyone kissed my dozin fther nd whispered in his er couldnt tell if he herd me sddled my horse nd ws one before rst liht t ws sunset when reched the cstle nd the do ors were swinin wide. rn throuh the rounds serchin behind every tree At lst cme to the
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rose rden where the rst buds were hunched inst the niht ir There found the best crumpled bundle eten by frost pulled nd pulled until the pdded msk ly uppermost brethed my het on it nd kissed the spot hd wrmed pulled o the veils one by one Surely 1t couldn't mtter wht sw now? sw hir blck s rocks under wter sw fce white s old linen sw lips red s rose just openin sw tht the best ws womn And tht she ws brethin which seemed to mtter more This ws strne story one would hve to lern new lnue to red lnue could not lern except by tryin to red the story. ws slow lerner but stubborn one t took me dys to lern tht there ws nothin monstrous bout this womn who hd lived lone n cstle settin ll her suitors riddles they could mke no sense of refusin to do the thins
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queens re supposed to do until the dy when knowin no one who could see her true fce she mde msk nd from then on showed her fce to no one t took me weeks to understnd why the fceless msk nd the nme of best miht be chosen over ll the ret world hd to oer After months of lookin sw tht beuty ws innitely vrious nd found it behind her white fce. struled to uess these riddles nd mke sense of our story nd before knew it summer ws come in nd the red roses just openin And s the yers owed by some villers told trvelers of best nd beuty who lived in the cstle nd could be seen wlkin on the bttlements nd others told of two beuties nd others of two bests
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mid who brouht me up told me ht my mother ws restless She sid hd my mother's eyes lwys edin towrd the steep horizon nd my mothers lon hnds never still As the story went my mother st one dy beside n open window lookin out over the snow embroiderin coronets on dress for the christenin of the child she crried The mid wrned her ht she'd ctch her deth if she st in the cold letin snow drift in nd sprinkle her
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work. My mother didnt seem to her. Just then the neede drove itself into her n er nd three dros of bood stined the snow on the ebony window frme My mother sid to her md The duhter crry wil hve hir s blck s ebony lis s red s blood skin s white s snow. Wht will she hve tht wll sve her from my fte? The mid hd no nswer or not one tht she coud remember Then the ins seized my mother nd crried her wy Thou ws so much smer thn she ws ws stroner hd no reson not to wnt to live t ws the mid who cred for me s rew Every utumn in her ocket she brouht me the rst le from the orchrd This ws not the mellow obe they served my fther month lter but the hrdly berble tn of the rst rienin so shr it mde me shudder Le t t be sid tht my fther did row to cre After the mid too died
Th Ta l f t h Ap p l
in her turn he found me wnderin the drfty corridors of the cstle nd took me up in his sti ermine rms. n the summertime he liked to crry me throuh the orchrd nd toss me hih in the ir then swin me low over the reen turf e ws my toymn nd my tll tree As rew nd rew he bounced me on his lp till our cheeks sclded But the dy there ws ptch of red on my crumpled sheet my fther brouht home new wife She ws not mny yers older thn ws but she hd seen one royl husbnd into the rve lredy She hd my colorin er fce ws set like jewel in rin. could see she ws frid she kissed me nd spoke sweetly in front of the whole court but could tell she would be my enemy There ws only room for one queen in cstle Yes hnded this newcomer the rin with its hundred tinklin keys the en crusted coronet the velvet trin of stte till she ws lden down with ll the pprtus of power But it ws me the folk
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wved to s the cre rttled by it ws me who ws mirrored in my fther's fond eyes mine ws the rst pple rom the orchrd know now tht woud hve liked her if we could hve met s irls nkle deep in river. would hve tken her hnd in me if hd not found it weihted down by the ruby stolen rom my mother's coolin ner could hve loved her if if if er lips were soft inst my fore hed when she kissed me in front of the whole court But knew from the sons tht stepmother's smie is like snke's so shut my mind to her from tht very rst dy when ws riid with the let tin of rst blood n the ollowin months she did ll she could to woo my friendship nd ben to soen thouht perhps hd misred the tiht look in her eyes. Eventuly et her dress me up in the silks nd brocdes she hd brouht over the mountins t ws she who lced up 4 6
.
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my stys every mornin till ws ink with mirth; lst thin t niht it ws she who undid the serin lces one by one nd loosed my esh into slee With her own hnds she used to work the jeweled comb throuh my hir tesin out the knots Not content with ll this she used to feed me frut from her own bowl ech slice oised between ner nd thumb till ws redy to tke t Thouh never trusted her took deliht in wht she ve me My fther ws cheered to see us so close Once when he cme to her room t niht he found us both there crossleed on her bed under se of velvets nd lces tryin how ech errin looked nst the other's er e ut hs hed bck nd luhed to see us Two such fir ldies he remrked hve never been seen on one bed But which of you is the firest of them ll? We looked t ech other she nd nd chimed in the chorus of his luhter Am minin in retrosect tht our voices rn little out of tune? You see
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her hr ws blck s col mine s ebony My lis were red s hers were nd our cheeks s le s two es of book closed toether. But our fces were not the sme nd not comrble He let out nother uw Tell me he sked how m to ude between two such beutes? looked t my stemother nd she stred bck t me nd our eyes were like mirrors set ooste ech other mkin corrdor of relectons nntely hollow My fther rinned s he kssed me on the forehed nd ushed me ently out of the room nd bolted the door behnd me But s the ll of yer went by nd my stemother styed s thin s the dy he hd rst brouht her to the cstle my fther's mouth ben to stien. He ques tioned every doctor who ssed throuh the mountins He mde hs youn wife drnk cows blood to strenthen her thouh it turned her stomch Fnlly he forbde her to o wlkin in the orchrd
Th Ta l f t h p p l
with me or lift hnd or do nythin except lie on her bck nd wit to nd herself with child the child who would be his lonedfor son. My stepmother ly on her bck nd rew so limp I could see the bones below her eyes When I brouht her redbound books nd jeweled errins she turned her fce wy I took to wlkin in the orchrd on my own in nd once or twice boredom drove me little wy into the forest tht ly beyond the cstle wlls Fer enlivened those fternoons I kept my bck to the liht nd turned my hed t every crek of wind The forest ws like forein court with its own unspoken rules The birches moved to music only they could her the oks wnted for nothin needed no touch As nother yer stretched into sprin it ws not my stepmother who ly swollen nd sick but my fther He curled up on his side like ber troubled by ies I stood by his bed on nd o but he ws pst crin. He cursed the doctors
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he cursed his enemies he cursed the two wives who had failed him and nally with a wet mouth he cursed the son who had never come My stepmother had me called to the throne room where she sat huddled in ermine st closed around the scepter Say that am queen she said You are my fathers wife replied will be queen after he is dead she said made no reply Say that am queen she repeated her ners whitenin around the scepter f you really were told her it would need no sayin She stood on the pedestal above me The moment am a widow she said could have you cast out ndeed f you cross me in this she said condinly could have a huntsman take you into the forest chop out your heart and brin it back on a plate Stron meat murmured @ 5 0 �
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c do t she howled hve the ower sid oth. She lshed out with the sceter but steed bck d it crshed to the oor ws oe before t rolled to hlt Tht iht herd my feet hmmer trck to my fthers room ltteed my fce ito my illow wited. No soud cutti throuh the drk cstle; o l word for me The le ly ist my eyelids still dry decded ot to sty to see wht the dy of the erl would bri which courters eyes would shie with lttery d which litter with violece decided to leve it ll to her d leve her to it lled my hems with old eces d slied wy f t hd bee witer still tht rst iht would hve ished me; oly the mild ir ws my slvtio Wider th ever mied the forest ws home to cretures couldt ut mes to this with silver eyes d udble teeth; for ll
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my rs didnt slee wink tht niht By sunrise ws more lost thn ny nestlin All my lns cme to nothin: never found the fmily of the mid who hd rised me nor n emty cotte to live in. Everythin I ut y tonue to tsted like oison. After wndern hlf strved nd hlf crzed for more dys thn cn remember I hd the ood fortune to be tken in by n of woodsmen They ut wter to my stined lis nd sked who ws The truth ws quicker thn lie so told it They nodded They hd herd of the deth of the kin One of them sked wht ws in my skirts to mke them so hevy nd sid Knives nd he took his hnd o my thih nd never touched me in Tht rst niht they fed me nd every other niht I fed them Thouh squt nd surly with erth in every line of their fces these were not bd men nd considerin how little my condition entitled me to they treted me roylly
Th Ta l f t h p p l
I uessed how to cook the food they threw on the table atherin toether from the shattered jisaw of memory everythin I must have seen the castle servants do ten thousand tmes. Gradually I learned how to keep huner at bay and disease from the door: all the sorcery of re and iron and water ard work was no hardshp to me 1t kept the pictures at bay Whenever I slackened or stopped to rest by the re I was haunted by the imae of my stepmother My father was only a tiny picture in my mind shut away like a miniature in a locket But hs youn widow stalked behind my eyes rowin tall or wide as I let my mind dwell on her now smiln now spittin ever stretchin like a shadow aainst a wall I pictured her life as the queen of the castle and it was stranely familiar: lon days in chare of re and iron and water er hands would stay smooth as lilies while mine were scrubbed raw day by day but we were livin much the same kind of life
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The men never sked wht ws in my mind not even when ot lost in dze nd let the broth burn. They let me drem by the re like ct This ws only lull time out of time You see knew my stepmother would nd me The thred between us ws stretched thin wound round trees nd sned in thickets but never broken. Somehow trusted she would trck me down nd kill me But when she cme t lst she seemed to hve chned looked out over the hlf door one summer dy nd there she stood in the clerin hitchin her horse to tree There ws nothin of the wife bout her when she smiled My come into your house? she sked sid no nd turned wy But when hd stoked up the re nd boiled the shirts nd chopped the turnips went bck to the door out of curiosity nd she ws still there with her bck to the tree let her in for minute She sid how thin hd rown sid ws well.
Th Ta l f t h App l
We sid not word of wht ws pst She sid keep brekn mirrors Sttin by the re with her shut my eyes nd it felt like old tmes She stood behind me nd lced up my stys tihtly the wy could never lce them on my own When they cme home tht niht the men found me lone in sort of stupor. First they were nxious to her my breth come so quick nd shllow nd then they were nry to see the turnps curlin on the tble nd no food n the pot. They sd my stepmother hd to be sorceress to nd me so deep n he forest Some weeks went by nd ws myself in scrubbin nd mshin nd ernin my keep The visit ben to seem like nother one of my dydrems One fternoon ws restin on tree stump outside the cotte sntchin moment of sun on my bck when herd the jnle of her hrness This time she knelt beside me nd there ws nothin of the queen bout her. hven't
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hd niht's sleep sce you left she sid it fees ike dncin in shoes of redhot iron Will you come home now? sid No nd turned my hed wy She took out her jeweled comb nd ben to drw it throuh my hir ptient with ll the burrs nd knots my new life hd put in it shut my eyes nd et the points of the comb di into my sclp scrpin down to the kernel of memory When they cme home tht niht the men found me curled round the tree stump on the dmp rss They lied me up nd told me tht my stepmother must be witch to put such poison of idleness in my hed. They wrned me to sty inside nd shut the door to l comers. For some weeks did wht ws told kept house nd kept quiet. My hir knotted in my stys hun loose But one fternoon in erly utumn ws troubled by whi of s cent of overpowerin shrpness coud not remember wht it ws l knew ws tht coud hrdy stnd it. turned nd
Th Ta l f th A p p l
there t the hlf door my stemother stood n le in her uturned hnd Stemother yes tht ws the word but there ws nothin of the mother bout her The le ws hlf rie One side ws reen the other red. She bit into the reen side nd swllowed nd smiled. took the le from her without word bit into the red side nd ben to choke Fer nd excitement locked in strule in my throt nd blckness seeed cross my eyes fell to the round t ws ll white where went like wrm snow cked into the nles nd crevices of my body There ws no liht or noise or color thouht ws tresure stowed wy for sfekeein When cme to ws joltin lon in n oen con. Sunliht stbbed my eyelids The woodsmen were berin me down the mountin out of the woods ed couhed st u How their eyes rounded how they luhed to see me brethin But lie down one sid you
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re not well yet Until you were poisoned we hd been forettin who you re sid nother now we're tkin you to nother kindom where theyll know how to tret princess Lie down nd rest little one sid third we hve lon wy to o My hed ws still swimmin thouht miht fint in. But my mouth ws full of pple slippery still hrd vinery t the edes. could feel the mrks of my own teeth on the skin bit down nd juice rn to the corners of my lips t ws not poisoned t ws the rst pple of the yer from my fther's orchrd chewed till it ws eten up nd knew wht to do mde them set me down nd ot out of the box def to their clmor stred round me till could see the cstle tiny inst the mecolored forest wy up the hill turned my fce towrd it nd strted wlkin
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reson would hve killed you to sty queen is tht hve no riht to be queen. hve been frud from the beinnin ws born mid duhter to mid in the court of widow fr cross the mountins How coud you pmpered princess know wht it's like to be servnt pir of hnds household obect To be no one to own nothin to owe every lst mouthl to those you serve? A our queen loved in the world 61
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ws her horse nd her duhter The horse ws white mnicent mre with neck like n ok The princess ws born in the sme month of the sme yer s ws But where ws drk with thick brows tht overshdowed my briht eyes the princess ws fir Yellowish thouht her slihtly trnsprent s if the sun hd never seen her fce All she liked to do ws wlk in the rden up nd down the shdy pths between the hedes. Once when ws pickin nettles for soup sw her stumble on the rvel nd bruise her knee. The queen rn into the rden t the rst cry lied her onto her lp nd wiped two jeweled ters wy with her white hndkerchief Another time ws scrubbin herth nd stood up to stretch my bck when luhter oted throuh the open window cuht siht of the two of them cnterin pst on the queens horse their hnds dncin in its snowy mne. My own mother died youn nd tired hvin mde me promise to be
Th e Ta le f t h e Handkec h i ef
ood maid for the rest of my days kissed her waxy forehead and knew tha would break my word But for he moment worked hard kept my head low and my apron clean At las was raised o the position of maid to he princess Tellin me of my ood forune he queen resed her smooth hand for half a moment on my shoulder f your mother only knew she said how i would ladden her heart The youn princess was a enle misress never havin needed to be anythin else The year she came of ae the queen received ambassadors from all he neihborin kindoms The prince she chose for her dauhter lived a lon day's ride away He was said to be youn enouh The irl said neither yes nor no i was not her quesion to answer She sood very still as tried the bridal dresses on her for size My hands looked like hen's claws aainst he shinin brocade The queen told her dauhter no to be sad never to be willl and always
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to remember her royl blood listened my mouth ll of pins. f hd hd such mother would never hve left her to journey into strne country would hve fouht nd scremed nd clun to the folds of her clok But then my blood is not royl. Ahed of her duhter the queen sent old nd silver nd box ll of crystls. She took the princess into the chmber where ws pckin rs nd there she took out knife nd pressed the point into her own ner. could hrdly believe it lmost cried out to stop her. The queen let three drops of blood fll onto her lwn hndkerchief She tucked this into the irl's bosom syin tht s lon s she kept the hndkerchief she could come to no ret hrm And then the queen led her duhter out into the courtyrd nd swun her up onto her own ret horse would come with you myself she sid if only my kindom were secure n these troubled times you will be sfer where you're
Th e Ta le of t h e Han d e rc h i ef
oin n my plce you wil hve my own horse to crry you nd your own mid to ride behind you This ws the rst hd herd of it went to pck my clen linen The rest of my bits nd pieces left under the mttress for the next mid hd othin worth tkin into fr country. n the courtyrd stblemn hoisted me onto n weihed down with ll the princesss prphernli wtched the queen nd the princess kiss oodbye in the erlymornin sun liht The horse's mne shone like torch but where the mothers forehed rested inst the duhters the sun behind them ws blotted out. We trotted lon for some hours without spekin the princess seemed ost in dydrems nd my mother hd tuht me never to be the r st to brek silence The dy rew hotter s the su crwled up the sky Swet ben to brek throuh the princesss white throt tricklin down the neck of her hevy
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od dress My thin smock ws scorchin throuh Suddeny there ws int in the trees. The princess brouht her ret white horse to ht nd sid, without ookin t me, Pese my oden cup with some coo wter from tht strem The het in my hed ws hmmer on n nvi, poundin sword into shpe. t ws the rst order hd ever dis obeyed in my ife f you're thirsty, tod her, et it yoursef The princess turned her miky fce nd stred t me When my eyes resed to f she cimbed down, itte wkwrdy, nd untied her cup She pued bck her vei s she wked to the strem ws thirsty mysef, but didn't move. The white horse ooked round t me with its on eyes tht seemed to sy, f her mother ony knew, it woud brek her hert. When the princess wked bck from the strem, her mouth ws wet nd her cheeks were pe We rode on for sever hours unti
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the sun ws beinnn to snk The princess rened n t the ede of rver nd sked me in more shyly if would fetch her some wter did men to sy yes ths time now tht hd tuht her lesson; ws not plottn nythin But when opened my mouth the sound tht cme out ws No. f you wnt to drnk sid horsely you hve to stoop down for it. held her ze until her eyes fell She ot down nd stepped throuh the rushes to the wter. The horse tossed its fomcolored hed nd nehed s f wrnin of n enemy pproch. My lips were crcked my tonue rsped nst them s wtched the princess She bent over the strem to ll her cup nd somethin uttered from the curve of her brest into the wter. My hndkerchief she cred s t sld wy. As if syin wht t ws would brin t bck. Wth tht lept down from my knockkneed horse nd wded into the river found the squre of linen cuht m knot of reeds mud sltin over the
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three brown dros turned nd shook it in the rincesss fce A dro of wter cuht on her olden sleeve You know nothin told her Do you even know how to wsh hndkerchief? She shook her hed er fce ws mrked with red like fint lines on m You scrub it on rock like this told her nd scrub in nd scrub hrder nd kee scrubbin until your ners re numb. Look the sots re comin out Your mother s royl blood s nerly one The rincess mde smll mon Look there re only three fint mrks left sid And then you nd somewhere o the round nd leve it to blech in the sun instructed her tossin the hndkerchief u into the hih brnches of tree. The rincesss eyes left the hndkerchief nd cme bck ers ws the look of the rbbit nd it brouht out ll the snke in me Tke o your dress told her
Th e Ta le f t h e Handkerc h i ef
She bliked Tke off your dress or 'll stp t from your body with my bre hds She reched behid to ufste the hooks did't help wtched The slipped my ow pli dress over my hed. The ir felt silke o my shoulders The dresses ly crumpled t our feet like skeskis Look sid Where is the dierece betwee us ow? The pricess hd o swer picked up the golde cup d lled 1t from the strem drk uti my throt hurt splshed my fce d rms d brests util shivered despite the su The stepped ito the sti golde dress d tured my bck o the girl After momet she uderstood d beg to do up the hooks d eyes Whe she ws ished she hesitted the pulled o the smock hd left i hep by the rushes t suited her er fir hir hug roud her dry lips led the cup gi d pssed it to her She drk without word 6 9
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When ot onto the white horse, it rered under me, nd hd to ive it kick to mke i stnd still. wied until could her the irl settlin in the sddle of the old n, nd then wheeled round m the queens duhter, old her, nd you re my mid, nd if you ever sy otherwise will rip your hrot open with my bre hnds. Her eyes slid do�n to my ners The skin ws nry with clluses on the thumbs nyone who sw it would know rummed round in the sddleb until found pir of white loves nd pulled them on. The irl ws lookin wy moved my ret horse lonside hers, until ws so close could hve struck her. Swer by the open sky, whispered, tht you will never tell nyone wht hs hppened by this river swer by the open sky, she repeed doublly, risin her eyes o i We rode on The old dress ws hevier hn coud hve imined. My bones fel s if they hd been mde to 7 0
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ber this burden s if they hd found their one true dress t st. t ws drk by the time we reched the pce They hd lit double row of torches for us to follow The prince cme to the foot of the steps nd ifted me down from my horse Throuh the hrd brocde couldnt feel whether he ws wrm or cold He ws ple with nerves but he hd kind fce At the top of the steps mde him put me down sid The mid brouht with me Yes? His voice ws thin but not unplesnt She does not know nythin bou witin on ldies Coud you set her to some simper tsk? Perhps she could mind the eese suested the prince ve sine nod nd wlked beside him towrd the ret doors My bck pricked f the ir ws oin to denounce me this would be the moment for it But herd nothin except the clink in hrnesses s they led the horses wy
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found tht knew how to behve like princess from my short lifetime of wtchin snpped my fn oered my loved hnd to be kissed never bent my bck At times forot for moment tht ws ctin. But never forot to be frid hd wnted to be mrried t once but the pce of royl life is sttely. There were pis to be fttened spices to wit for the kin nd his rmy to come sfely home ws iven brod chmber with view of the city rch nd ll the elds beyond The rst week slid by. The oose irl seemed to o bout her duties without word. hd never eten such ood food in my life but my stomch ws knotted rope. Every dy mde some excuse to pss by the stbles nd ctch limpse of the ret white horse in its box. ts eyes rew loner s they xed on me f the queen her mother only knew they seemed to sy. becme convinced tht it ws the
Th e Ta le f t h e Handker c h i ef
horse who woud betry me. t ws not scred the wy the oose ir ws n the drems tht cme to ride me in my it fether bed the horse drew pictures in the mud under the city rch with its hoof illustrtin my crime for ll the court to see Sometimes it spoke loud in my hed its voice deep whistle tellin l it knew woke with my knees under my chin s if were pcked in brrel s we punish thieves in the mountins Tht evenin t dinner sid to my ple nc Tht brute of horse rode here tried to throw me on the rney Then we will hve it destroyed he ssured me. His eyes were devoted the shpe of lmonds. He looked s if he would believe every word tht slipped from my mouth The next dy pssed by the stbeyrd nd the box ws empty Bck in my chmber threw the window open to the delicte ir My eye cuht siht of somethin briht niled to the city
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rch Somethin in the shpe of horses hed Below it stood irl eese cckin t her skirts From this distnce couldnt be sure if her lips were movin She must hve bribed the kncker to sve the horse's hed nd ni it up where she would pss by She must hve uessed the exct shpe of my fers wtched her mke her wy throuh the rch nd out into the open elds Another week crwled by Every dy ooked out for the ir pusn under the rch with her noisy ock nd tried to red her fce wore my nest dresses but my hert ws drummin under their weiht kept my white loves buttoned even on the hottest dys ben to worry tht the queen miht come to the weddin fter ll s surprise for her duhter despite the dner of levin her kindom un urded n the drems tht lined up lon my bed the queen pointed t me cross the royl dinin tbe nd spped the crown from my hed She ripped the
Th e Ta le f t h e Handke c h i ef
love from my hnd nd held up my ner pressin it to the point of her knife till drk drops stined the tblecloth: See she cried there is nothin royl bout ths blood common s dirt. When woke doubled up felt s if they were drivin lon spikes throuh the sides of the brrel into my skin One dy herd tht messener hd come from the kindom of my birth couldn't et to him before the prince did st in my chmber witin for the hevy trmp of the urds But the step when it cme t lst ws soft The prince sid The queen your mother hs fllen in btte So she will not be comin to the weddin? sked nd only then understood his words bent over to hide my fce from him; his entle eyes shmed me hoped my luhter would sound like ters And then the ters did come nd hoped they were for her queen ded in her prime nd not just for my own trecherous self
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dont know who told the oose irl hdnt the coure suppose she herd it in the kitchen or from oose boy thouht tht the moment of herin miht be the moment she woud run throuh the court to denounce me But the next mornin she ws stndin under the rch in the usu wy her fce turned up s if in converstion with the rottin hed bove her. She pused no loner thn usul before wkin her ock into the eds The dy before the weddin rode out into the country found mysef ner the river where it ben this fntsticl chrde stopped beside the bnk nd there in the tree bove my hed ws sh of white hd to tke o my dress to climb or would hve ot stuck in the brnches. The tree left red lshes on my rms nd thihs At lst my hnd reched the hnd kerchief t ws wshed throuh by the dew nd bleched sti by the sun but there were still three fint brown mrks
Th e Ta le f t h e Hankerc h i ef
sw then tht the end ws comin When hd dressed myself rode striht for the elds round the cstle to nd the oose irl All t once knew it would be toniht she would tell them she ws witin till the lst minute so my hopes would be t their hihest just before the urds cme to tke me wy to wlledup windowless room There she ws with the breeze blowin her yellow hir out of ts bonds nd cross her sunburnt fce rode up to her then jumped down held out the hndkerchef my hnd ws shkn t still bers the mrks of your mothers royl blood told her f ive it to you now will you let me run wy before you tell them? She tucked the hndkerchief into her rouh dress nd sid Tell wht? stred t her Your fer of me will de wy sid Your need to spek the truth will swell within you You will be overherd lmentn s you sleep beside
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the stove you will code i the reeds d they will si it bck er eyes icked upwrd She sid By the ope sky swer will ever tell wht is ot true But you re the royl pricess re mided her A little time pssed before she spoke No she sid dot thik so ot ymore The horse helped me to uder std Wht? Whe it ws live it seemed to be proud d ster horse she sid After you hd it killed could her it tlki i my hed d wht it hd to sy surprised me My mouth ws hi ope 've row ccustomed to this life the oose irl wet o hve foud the elds re wider th y rde ws lwys ervous whe ws pricess i cse would foret wht to do You t the dresses better you crry it o My mouth ws dry shut it could
Th e Ta le f t h e Ha d erc h i ef
hrdly beleve her words ths unlooked for repreve f your mother only knew protested it would brek her hert My mother is ded sid the irl nd she knows everythn now As herd her the brrel felt lwys bout my ribs seemed to crck open ts hoops rinin bout my feet could brethe could stretch Tht niht t dinner the prince lled my oblet with the best wine nd ve him rel smile e hd very clen nernils nd the blue pllor of true roylty e ws ll needed Perhps would even row to love him in the end once ws truly sfe; strner thins hd hppened Once hd the crown settled on my hed nd bby or two on my lp who knew wht kind of womn mht turn out to be? Tht niht slept deep nd dremless Durn the weddin my mind wn dered looked out the chpel wndow onto the rooftops From here couldnt
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see the city rch or the wide yellow elds. wondered how the oose irl hd felt when she herd the weddin bells thouht of how both of us hd resed to follow the pths mpped out for us by our mothers nd their mothers before them but hd perversely one our own wys insted nd wondered whether this would brin us more or less hppiness in the end Then herd tiny couh When the prince took his lce hndkerchief wy from his mouth there ws sptter of blood on it ve my husbnd proper serchin look for the rst time sw the red rims of his eyes the hollows of his cheeks Once more seemed to feel the brrel locked round me the spikes hmmerin throuh knew if ws not with child in month or two would hve nothin to hold on to The dy fter my husbnd's nerl would be wnderin the world in in serch of crown could cll my own.
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see me now reduced to skul hve shed ll the trppins of esh skin nd mne You'll look much like this when youre ded too ow sliht our differences become between lives n my lst ife ws not horse but womn like you Or rther womn quite unlike you Where you huner for ttention sickened of t You wnt to be queen over the wide world hid wy from t When ws irl used to live in
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tower t ws misshpen tree of stone hidden in forest it ws mine The womn who built it ws not my mother Someties she would sy tht she hd found me rowin in clump of wild rlic; other times tht she hd won me in bet other times tht she hd bouht me for hndl of rdishes Once she climed tht she hd sved me without syin from wht. remember nothin of my erly childhood except the odd limpse of rust on te butter in churn knew wht town ws nd plouh nd bby thouh couldnt remember ever hvin lid eyes on these thins The womn sid thee must hve been tme when my eyes were not clouded but from the dy fell into her hnds ws blind s mole Before there ws ever tower we lived in stone hut in the woods ner n old mine The ony thin hd from the me before the only thin owned tht the womn hd not ven me ws comb
Th e Ta le f t h e Ha ir
mde out of n ntler liked to sit beside the window of our cotte so the ir brihtened itte in front of my fce With the comb I used to form my on hir into sheet then into cois s slick s the strem tht wound throuh the woods The womn ws my store of knowede my cche of wisdom Which ws odd since she hd so ittle to sy nd wht she spoke ws never bove whisper for fer of disturbin the birds nd the bests She tuht me you ony hve the riht to kill creture when you know its nmes nd wys. She wlked out in ll wethers nd never shrnk from the cold Sometimes she spoke of her chidhood in country so frozen tht people could wlk on wter When she mur mured of such thins under her breth it ws s if could see them As the yers pulled me towrd womnhood my body swelled my spirits whired. My hir ben to row fster one dy could sit on its shrp ends
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nd noher dy n, could cover my knees wh i fel s weih pullin he bck of my hed lolled like cur ins over my cheeks. ws never wrm enouh: oo lle of he dy ever reched down hrouh he rees o our coe Once when he womn cme bck wih bowl of milk from sheep h hd sryed ino he woods, sid, wish could lve up here in he lih, n hh ower Wh do you wn lih for if no o see by? she sked All could nswer ws: lke he feel of on my fce As ever, he womn dd wh sked, whou skin nyhn n reurn bu ws he rs me she hd no undersood me Wh her wehered hnds she brouh sones from he old mine nd o ok mud nd leves nd buil lle ower behind our hu where he horn bushes rew. When shook my hed ou he rs wndow she hd mde, my hr
Th e Ta le f t h e Ha ir
spilled down The womn uhed s she wlked by felt the pull of her hnd ke sh throuh the rpids of my hr iher crowed So she fetched more stones from the od mne nd built nother room on top of tht nd then nother till the round wl hoisted tself up most s hh s the trees At st the womn cimbed down the steps herd her wipe the crust of mud from her hnds on tree She complined tht the tower ws ll skew but when I stood t the bse nd stretched my rms round its jed irth knew it ws just wht needed We went bck to our old lfe except tht s shelled nuts nd chopped roots in the hihest room of the tower the lht ws white inst my fce The womn cme nd went brnin imp rbbits from her trps nd the odd hndl of berries We didnt tlk much she nd Often whole dy would o by wth no need for nmin thins But the time rst bled hd
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nihtmre of the hunt The wood ws ll of men who were so sts nd lso the dos tht chsed them My hir ws cuht in tnle of hede my clothes shredded by the thorns There ws no sfety There ws no cover There ws no door to the tower when in my drem stumbed throuh the thornbushes nd found it t lst clubbin my sts on the stone ws to be et in woke only when the womn cme upstirs puled my hnds from the stones nd took me in her rms s she hd never done before She hed me til I slept whisperin m my er ll the nmes of the herbs. The next dy the trees were no friends of mine They slouched on the ede of our clerin wrppin their rms round themseves nd hissin in the wind stood in the door of the hut nd shook in spite of my cot of rbbit skins Even my hir wound round nd round my shoulders coudnt keep me wrm By the time the womn cme bck from her plot of bens nd pottoes
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hd cimbed u the nrrow stone stes nd st by the window Even if 'd hd my siht, the womn wys sid there ws nothin but treetos to see shook my hir o my shouders now it sid over the dusty si The womn cimbed u nd stood behind me coud te her hevy ste on the stone, the sme of shees woo on her bck, wid ric on her ner tis tod her 'm frid of the forest But the forest is wht we et she sid Wht we wer Wht we burn tod her cn't rest for fer of the wind nd the woves nd the huntin horn Do you think d et you be hurt? she sked Trust my ers to her the horn nd my re to scre the woves, nd my rms to kee out the wind But trusted nothin but stone Bock u the window beow me, beed her, nd the window beow tht nd the windows there re excet this one Thouh she must hve thouht me
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md she did it Every niht now slept sfe by the hihest window mon the tossin leves The womn preferred her hep of rs t the bottom of the tower she hd no tste for heihts The door t the foot of the tower could still open but why would climb down when the womn brouht me nythin needed? Sometimes to sve her les lened out the window nd let down bsket on rope hd woven of old rs she sid my stry hirs knotted into it linted like old thred st in the hih room nd chopped rdishes sinin to muse myself sn of the moon nd prince nd rin. The womn clled up from where she ws skinnin fox. Where did you her of such thins? n the stories. Wht stories? she sid never told you such stories Whos been tellin you stories? must hve herd them in the time before. 9 0
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She sid You hve never even seen mn. No I nswered but I cn imine I could her the weiht of her feet stompin into the woods nd I sn on Sprnkl h wth lavndr Grd hs throat wth gold For hr royal lovr rds to s hr On hs chargr so bold
Crude rhymes but they plesed me s I let the choppin knife drop nd set to loosenin nd combin nd replitin my hir And then like n nswer to my sons he cme It ws lte one niht the time when I felt lest the p between siht nd lck of siht At the end of the verse voice cme up from the forest oor. Who is it who sins so beutiy? it sked Come to the window tht I my see your fce I st like stone By the time I dred my feet to the window nd clled down 9 1
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there ws no nswer. But stll felt tht ws ben wtched so shrnk bck into my room. When t rst lht the womn climbed up with berries for my brek fst sked hd she slept sound throuh ll the noise of the wolves She hdn't herd thn The next niht ws redy for hm. Weave his shirt in one piece Polish his silver ho For he comes to bring ease T his lay all orlo
hd only just nished when hs voce rose from the drkness. Wll you come down to me? he sked. cnnot 'm frd of wkin the womn s she your mother tht you fer to wke her? No mother nor nothn to me sid. There ws lon silence so
Th e Ta le f t h e Ha ir
thouht he hd one ws bout to cll out fter him when he sked more horsey My come up to you? For minute it seemed impossible nd then remembered the rope knotted it round shrp stone in the wl nd threw it down brcin myself for his weiht The prince ws ll hd imined His hnd rspin mine t the window ws stron s wilow his neck smet of vender nd the shirt on his bck ws clen s wter His voice ws rouh but music nd his lips inst my cheek were sot s rbbits whiskers luhed nd tried to pul o his huntin oves but he held my hnds sti. sked him Wht do sound like? He sid ws so stirred by your son knew would hve no pece till sw you sked him Wht do look like? e sid ws so moved by the siht of you t the window knew would hve no pece till touched your fce
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tried to sk Wht do fee like? but his mouth ws stoppi my mouth. We were i ccord by surise f he herd me si it ws sfe to cl up to me f he souded the hor he wore m his belt woud cimb dow to him f he brouht me old ri would ive him my hd. The ext dy the wom brouht me bsket of pes from her pot d we sheed them toether. She ws sppish she hd't sept for the howli of the woves. odded d shut my eyes to mke deeper drkess could't stop smii Wht is you tody? she sked m her hbitul whisper Nothi s out Nothi you eed kow or mybe somethi you ever will The bow crshed ist the wl; could her pes rce cross the stoe There is othi do ot kow the wom bwed Everythi you thik you kow you hve ered from me.
Th e Ta le f t h e Ha ir
tred to nswer but she put her cold lethery hnds over my eyes You see nothn she sd you re helpless s lmb stll wet from the ewe Yet you hve deceved me I bowed my hed under the weht of her plms. I hve used up my yers to keep you wrm nd fed she sd n my er I nswered The fruts of the forest re free for ll. I hve ven my dys to keep you from lonelness The brds nd the bests re more fthful she shouted I hve worn out my rms pln stone on stone becuse you beed me to keep you sfe from the wnd nd the wolves nd the huntn horn. You should hve known better thn to ve me wht I sked for whspered ters creepn down my fce Now the wnd s scented wth lvender nd the wolves howl becuse they cnnot hve hm nd when he blows hs royl horn I wll o to hm
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There ws ln silence Nthin less ryl she sid t lst smshin smethin dwn n the slb between us She uided my hnd ver the pieces f hrn cmmn hrn The hrn ws mine she sid. knew wuld hve n pece till fund yu prince As she spke her whisper deepened int hrse musicl vice vice knew pulled bck nd threw the shrp frments in her fce cllin her witch mnster crrin ll the wrds she ever tuht me. When her ftsteps hd died wy herd the hevy br fll crss the dr t the bttm f the twer wited till my pulse hd stpped rrin Nt sund. Did she men t leve me t strve till beed fr friveness she wh hd been the wrst deceiver? scrbbled in every crner f the rm fr my cil f rpe but she must hve crried t wy with her. wept int my hir. wept enuh t ll up nther whle bdy until the 96
Th e Ta le f t h e Ha ir
plits rew hevy nd mtted Weihin them between my hnds relized tht my hir ws my own to do wht would with. The sml prin knife ws slow in my hnd but it swed throuh the plits one by one hd never cut my hir before expected somethin like pin or blood but ll felt ws liht ness like deer must feel t the shed din of ntlers Knotted toether end by end the plits mde the strnest rope it owed over my hnds ke int snke spered it on jed stone nd et myself out the window ws lihtheded shiverin with nothin between me nd the woves but the prin knife in my bet wlked to the ede of the clerin hnds out before me till they met the rst tree A itte wy into the woods cme on some berries reconized they were sour but not poison woudn't strve for ll her re must hve slept litte becuse when woke it ws niht siky blckness
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pressed on my eyelids. My fce ws scored by the brk of the tree lened on. Steps n the clerin stened She ws t the bse of the tower sobbin Let me in she clled horsely Let me climb up on your hir. Her voice ws so deep hd to remind myself tht there ws no prce herd the pus of breth s she ben to climb When she ot to the top nd looked in t the empty room there ws wil lke n niml in trp nd then sound like hollow tree fllin in the rst storm of wnter. After severl minutes hd pssed eded forwrd t ws my left foot tht found her felt my wy lon her body to her fce her eyes were shut wet wth wht thouht ws ters until tsted t picked the thorns from her lds s delictely s could. Her hnd cme up nd felt my hed the short dmp hir Cn you see? sked She whispered Wht does t mtter? The hedes my swell the lvender my
Th e Ta le f t h e Ha i
boom but it wl ll be wstend when you're one. took her hed on my chest nd wet over her st in her wounded eyes t ws the only wy knew to clen them ddnt know whether they would he or whether she would hve to lern the word from me now We ly there witin to see wht we woud see
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never been content to be nothin but a irl And so cannot tell you my story without that of my brother We were born on the same day; we shared our rst breath We rew up poor as taow in a city youve never seen The od people said if you stayed out all nht you'd be found dead of cold in the mornin Like the other children in the orphanae we had no peope of our own; we were al we had My brother was not like other V
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brother He howed me bird and beat in the picture book and told me their name He ave me h econdbet ice pick and howed me how to h throuh a hole Sometime he tayed out o late he had to throw pebble with hi blue ner till woke and opened the window for him to climb in loved my brother but ometime ued to dream that when woke up he would have been taken away wthout a trace. On that imained mornin when I looked into the plinter of mirror over the hearth would ee hi face in place of mine Snow would be impatient out ide the window like a dancer linin o her veil The old people would call me by my brother' name let me tie hi kate on and end me out to the rive with all the other boy On that day nothin and no one would top me from kimmin throuh the warm of now bee The day my brother wa indeed taken away knew it wa my fault for dreamin it @ 1 0 4
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He had already chaned by then or perhaps it was me couldnt be like him anymore The old people kept me indoors now ever since my chest had started to swell as if stun My brother poked me and lauhed with a new cold face He pushed away the picture books and ran out to the square skates slun over his shoulder The reason know what happened s that followed him waited a while till he old people would have forotten me then slid the latch Fo came to mee me at the door First saw nothin then the ray auze shapes of houses As ran down the street the buildins thickened till could believe in them A perfect white coin slid from behind the clouds and wondered to see the moon up so early in the day but then it brihtened as if catchin re and knew 1t was the sun masked in fo Perhaps if it had been me who was skatin throuh the square it would have been me the woman took away with her 0 5
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At rst lnce squshed in ber skn must hve looked like boy or ner enouh. ws stndn t the corner tryn to distinuish my brother n the swirl of skters when she drove by with the bells tinklin on her white sleh Slush spttered my boots ws ner enouh to see her fce len knowledeble too cold to need beuty ws not so fr wy tht couldnt limpse my brother's tousled hed buried in her ermine cme tht close. didn't shout out stood like tree stump rooted in dirty snow. The sleih bells fded in the distnce Tht niht didn't sleep. ce blossomed on the windows tll they rew drk The next morn my fce in the mirror ws the sme s ever the fce of irl squre with freckles like spry of mud When the old people sked me where my brother ws one sid A womn in white rs took him wy. They slpped me cr oss the mouth 1 0 6
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and told me not to make u stories They said every boy comes home when he's ood and hunry When they asked me the same question a few days later said didn't know They didn't ask me aain after that suose they thouht he had drowned in a hole in the river They ave me some red shoes nearly new but they never soke his name went down to the ver with a net on a stick and cauht a little sh left it on my brothers bed in case he came back but the new boy who moved into that bed that niht had eaten it by mornin lay awake after the others were aslee istenin for the faintest ebble but nothin shook the window excet snow and wind uled a feather out of the old illow and breathed on it to conjure u a bird that would carry me o but it only rew dam shut my eyes and was my brother ridin alon in the rs at the bottom of the sleih in a hot slee dreamin only 07
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of dinner Snow hissed under the runners crows scremed overhed wolves complined in the nerby trees but my brother ly curled up like ct t the womn's feet. woke up curs words I didn't know knew. Who ws she? How dre she? Hd she no brother of her own tht she hd to stel mine? My fce ws wet s if it hd strted to thw in the niht put on my new scrlet shoes tht my brother hd never seen nd set o to nd him. looked bck three times but no one followed Tht dy nd the next nd the next serched the city street t time. I sw boys of ll sorts bi nd smll boys with sktes nd boys with clos boys on errnds nd boys out for mischief boys who lent me their spinnin tops nd boys who pinched me nd boys who didnt see me but none of them ws my brother. At niht hid in stbles beside the stem strw An old womn ve me 0
Th e Ta le f t h e Br t h er
a s tail once, and a bread man let me ave a stale loaf anoter day Wen sno fell unkered under te eaves of an inn, smeing te re Afterard coudnt tel te ite streets apart, or eter ad searced tem before as alking in circles so cold couldnt remember my name n my dreams te sleig ent faster and faster til it as ying above te trees t as not r as lying in but featers te plumage of a san big enoug to y to te edge of te orld Wile as asleep a tief tried to steal my soes oke as se as unbuckling te second strap it nimble ngers seized er rists and it er on te nose like my broter taugt me Se spat blood red as sunset over te straecked sno Se lauged and lauged Wen ad fastened my soes on again let te tief come into te stra beside me. Se gave out plenty of eat for er sze Her tales ere tal but tey 1 0 9
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armed my ear. Se oed me er kife ad aid o e coud get ay pair of oe if e ated Se told me o ed ever ko ay ome but a table, or eate a bite but at er ger lced from a tall Ho e e a gro ed ave a great oue ad a gleamig leig to carry er back ad fort acro te city I told er about my broter, to top er boatig, becaue a broter a better ta all tee tig tat coud be tole. Ad te I remembered o I ad lot im Se aked ere e a ad ot tear ra do my face oto er I te morig e led me back to te great quare If tey ere ere oce teyl be ere agai, e aid; a tief i alay dra back ike a leaf to a drai Se tole a ot patry ad broke a piece o for me before diappearig do a ide treet All tat day I aited, lammig my feet up ad do to arm tem Su a uc a dazzle it urt my eye; iced 1 0
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puddles inked at me as if tey kne my business I kept my eyes sut until I eard bells coming but it as only some boys on a omemade sled. I called out to tem to see if tey remembered my broter bu tey ansered i a snoball It missed I stood still and kept my eyes sut till I tougt tey'd frozen over Muc later it as dark beteen te ouses My skates ad gron into te ground, my mittens ere stuck to my coat I ouldnt go back to te stable onigt I ould stay tere in te emp tying square until I couldn't feel any ting at all Tey ould nd me in te morning a ne satue for te city More like a bear cub tan an ice maiden, but still someting ort pointing at Sudden as tunder te sleig came round te corner Before I sa er pale face I kne it as te one Wite fur and bells passing me and it a lurc I ad tron myself forard and grasped te end of te sleig I as skidding 1 1
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toug te steets slus spaying me to te ips, dagged along like a feate It seemed an ou befoe te sleig made a sap tun and I as ton into a ditc. Wit sti ams I iped te sno fom my face It as clean, tasting of noting I ad neve been into te county befoe I got to my feet and peeed afte te sleig Bells ung fainte on te ai Dakness tickened beteen tall tees I as lost. So as to keep moving as long as I could I plodded don te oad I could feel noting belo te knees I as like tat begga gil it ooden legs I sa in te maket once. Only en I caugt sigt of my nges, anging like slaugteouse ags did I ealize tat I ad lost my mittens Just en te dak seemed to be apping me ound and I as inking of lying don in te sno a ligt picked its ay toug te tees I as alking like a dunk by no sometim es te ligt disappeaed o I tougt I as only 1 1 2
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imagining i Bu a las e pa urned a corner, and I i i and ere in fron of me as e bigges ouse I ad ever seen A lanern ung a e door, sining on e empy sleig Wa I did nex as no like e girl I ad been I cmbed e seps, si kneed Wen my ands failed o make any sound on e door bu a feeble pa ing I pulled off my soes, eir red leaer soaked almos black and sung a e ood i er ard eels Open up I belloed Open up is minue I ave come for my broer Wen se opened e door I as disraced for a second by er face, ier an e r of er collar Bu en I remembered and ung my soes a er fee Se sepped back Take my red soes, I soued bu give me back my broer. Tere e as in e all peering round er skir is mou as ful of cake; is grin caug e lig Wy im I oled like a baby Wy im and no me 3
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Her smile as genler an could ever ave expeced Se opened er arms as ide as ey ould go and said Come m, come m .
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face is o rtue so elbo grease must be your dory. Tats at my moter alays said to me It as er best joke oe se liked to repeat o passersby Oce se caugt me asleep e I sould ave bee cardig ool ad se pricked my same all over my face it te comb I ever dled agai Wat I eeded ever after I orked for or borroed at iteres t or did iout I am as ric o as I as oce poor ad
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half as rich as am lonely. f have turned to theft at last, it s because as once robbed of the best thng had, and the orst of it all is that deserved to lose t t all began ith a boast My mothers mouth as too big for her stomach she could talk up a storm at the rst drop of rain My daughter can spin anything, she ould bal out the indo at hesitant customers; ool, cotton, hemp, ax nothing s beyond her Come ths ay to the do's daughter the best spnster n this city or any For all her talk, kne she despised me. sa her biting on her brass ring; could count her rages by knots n the thread shoed her at the end of each day But the more disappointed her, the more custom she drummed up at her indo All ent ell as long as she oversa the spinnng herself; her hands spotted multitudes of sins and sa to them as @ 1 1 8
Th e Ta le f t h e Sp in t er
quick as eas But it te passg of years my moter's ngers began to curl Her ands dragged temselves around te ouse like stiff spiders After te smasing of te tird milk jug, se resigned erself to sitting all day at te indo Se sared at er traitor knuckles and arangued any buyer o ent to any oter door tan ours Inside er se began to spin gall into sickness; by te end of te year it selled as big as a baby In er nal fever, se took to screaming a single prase over and over, as if tey could ear er trougout te city: Sit into gold My daugter can spin sit into gold But er eyes folloed me around te eart Tey ung on my slippery spinning eel On er last morning, my moter's ands reaced out scrabbling for a purcase Not knoing at to give er, I put my ands in ers Se eld on, er long nails scoring my palms Te clouds in er eyes parted; er voice as sane Daugter, se said, @ 1 1 9
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if I ave trodden you underfoot it as to as out te dirt If I ave trampled you, it as to mes your bers into some ting useful Se tugged at te brass ring on er little nger until it came off, edged it blood; se slid it onto mine. Work ill be your moter, se ispered; it ill lead you troug dark days; it ill clear you a level place to rest at last I sat quite still for more an an our, listening to te silence, feeling te air beteen my lips Ten I prized my moter's cold ngers o mine and stood up Sympaty for my loss brougt in tice as many ordes. Te room began to ll up it bales Wenever I gre drosy over te eel, ypnotized by spinning sunligt, my moter's gostly croak startled my ear Wenever I anted to sut te door and ide aay, my moters foot edged it open Wenever I tried to rese an order, my moters and closed around my troat Flax mounted iger tan my ead on every 1 2 0
Th e Ta le of t h e S p in te r
side, and sealed o te indo I sat like a prisoner, and kne tat I could never spin it all if I lived to be a un dred years old I began to look around for an assistant Some ere too slo, oters too slapdas Tis one as a catterer tat one smelt sour Finally I eard of a young oman o ad been spinning all er life until er ouse ad burnt don around er If se as burnt into carcoal, I didn't care Be se atfooted from treading, stunglipped from licking, sollentumbed from pressg te tread, I ould take er Se as none of tese tings Se as small like a robin and slo in te ead; sentences seemed too muc for er I soed er my room, alled it gloing ax Se stood on one foot and said, in er alting ay, tat se as tinking of going back to te land of er birt I gave er my most pleading smle and called er Little Sister Se seemed to like te name o ould se 1 2
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take e pay Clot o pate o coin Se didnt eem to foow. Let me it at tabe e aked Gady Eat fom plate dink fom cup I would feed e wit my own and if only e would pin my touble away Se ageed to tay until te oom wa empty I watced, wideeyed a e ate toug te wok, ou by ou, day by day I at at te window and caled meily to paing cutome I aed pate and cup wit e evey evening. Te day Little Site ceaed te lat cone a new load aived, moe tan eve befoe Se cewed e lip and aid e wanted to go back to te land of e bit I put my and togete and begged. How could I ewad e Dee o baceet o milky peal Se ook e ead a if e didnt undetand te wod Let me eep in bed e aked Wilingy 2 2
Th e Ta le of t h e Sp in t e r
Be siser ruly and you no samed? I ould join my blood o ers for life if only se ould spin me rig ay up aga. Se agreed o say unil e room as empy My eyes resed on er as se cu roug e ork every day ere as anoer saf of lig across e room I sa a e indo in my bes dress and excanged greeings i andsome mercans I sared pillo and blake i Lile Siser every nig; se snored bu no loud enoug o keep me aake. Te day se cleared e las corner, a uge load of ax arrived from e rices eaver I lled all e room excep for a circle around er eel and sool Se bi er umb and said se as going back o e land of er bir and is ime se sounded like se mean i I en don on my knees and pu my face o e dusy oor. Treads clung in my air as I looked a er o could I make i up o er if se sayed? Would
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e take al my oue al my ortune te ring o my nger Se ook er ead o loly it eemed a i e a earcing or ometing in te corner o te room. Fle o your e e mumbled. Wat Firtborn in my arm I ut my ead back to laug and told er e a elcome to a ole litter o my ture oring i only e ould in me out o ti me Se agreed to tay Until te room 1 emty I aked making ure Stay e reeated Stay alay. Noting could ave made me aier Wit Little Siter at ome inning u er magic I could go out again eel te un inking my ace. dreed even ricer tan I a and aid call on ne ladie dined it eaver drank it moneymen Not tat a idling everyting I did a or te ake o buine eac courtey to a merca nt an arro 1 2 4
Th e Ta le f t h e S p in t er
aimed true And, nding my vocaton I learned tat my moter as rigt after all Work as a rope on a sip n roug ater, a candle on a creaking staircase, a potato in a beggars embers It kept me sane and brigteyed; t kept from from delling on te past; it even kept me from remembering tat I as a oman Wic is te only clue I can gve as to o I, so sensible, daugter to a farseeing moter found myself it cild Id ave died before telling te mercant in question turning up like a beggar at is door I ouldnt ave married even if I could ave; I as a oman of business no, a oman of aairs far too far gone to make a good fe I tre up my breakfast every day for a eek Little Sister found me eeping into a ple of ax, and knelt don beside me We orked it all out. It ould be inter by te time I gre fat, so I could ea a cloak tat id everyting I ould tell te neigbors tat my assstant ad got
1 2 5
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eself a geat belly (Too dull in te its to sout out fo elp poo ceatue ) I ould boast of my kindness in keeping e on {We oking omen must stand by eac ote) Little Siste could keep an eye on te baby ile se span, te tead iing sootingly onto te bobbin I sould ave knon tings ouldnt un tat smootly Te nigt of my connement I lay gnaing at te seets, squeezing Little Sistes and eneve I needed to sceam so se ould sceam in e on voice fo te neigbous to ea It seemed to me in my deliium tat my mote ad tied my tigs togete, so te same ould split me apat It felt like many days late en Little Siste lifted te baling gout of es in e teadscaed ands I cut te cod myself I as in suc a uy Hes all yous, I said, tying to laug Se took im aay to be cistened I pessed my face into te soiled seet and tougt of being dead 1 2 6
Th e Ta le of t h e Sp in t er
As soon as e bleeding ad sopped I reurned o ork I aered buyers, raded iicisms i eavers, made i my business o kno e name of every mercans ife in e ciy I as in again, fas on my fee, o be seen around on in every ouse bu my on Because e baby cried all day all nig Lile Siser claimed e aed ax i made im sneeze I nodded, bu kne e as a ing possessed I ad bales of ax sacked iger around e four alls o mufe is baling. Te spinning as suering oo Lile Siser as alays running o see a as e maer i im I gre oer; e read smel of im I sayed ou of eir ay as muc as I could, bu one aernoon I came ome o nd Lile Siser asleep over er eel, and e baby drooling ino a fres ank of ool I picked i up and slapped im across e face Lile Siser oke a e babys rs sriek, bu said noing I alked ou e door and sayed aay ill e folloing 1 2 7 .
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evening By te time I came back every ting seemed peacel. Outside te door ere stacks of buttercoored bobbins, ready for colection Inside as noting at al Te room as absolutely empty I ran faster tan I ever ad before, faster tan my moter ould ave ougt decent, faster tan I tougt I could. I caugt up it tem at last, on te bridge ust outside te city gates Litte Sister ad bound te baby into er dress; e as fast asleep against er es Gasping for breat, I tod er to give back at as mine Se looked me in te eye ike se never ad before and said, You promised Firstborn I begged er, for friendsip, for sis terood, to take a te gold I ad but give me back my cild. Se cured er lip and said, Your god not ort sit I knet don on te cold stone of te bridge and clung to er skirts Dont desert me, Little Sister I'll be dierent. Se looked at me it someting like pity and said, Don't kno me 2 8
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Wat Never aked my name Didnt Never boy' name eiter, e aid. Taking im aay no o e kno o Se aited till my eye fell, ten alked My knee felt frozen to te ground ooked troug te lot in te parapet Te black river a liding toard me bringng o kne o many ardorking day, o kne ic deire ic regret
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had brother that mother say e ere pair of hands one fast one slo I once had father he got lost in oods I once had mother Huntman had onderl beard Let me and brother come too into oods ith gun. Brother let me help little house of branches ill broke and he push aay Things changed after e held broom behind our hut and hey jumped Things ent sour milk in churn all forgotten. S ky ent far off and leaves ent scsh
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scrish Too cold for sno, say moter
Put broter and me sleeping it cckens not annoy im One nigt it er arder whap whap so er voice ent big into rafters oke cickens say, Curse you Ten on no luck for untman Means no meat for us Broter say moter eat er ords I see only nuts and old bread Se say, Sorry sorry Se put last drops oly ater on untman gun. Still no luck One ngt e come ome soed lke pine Next day lie in smelly rs all day bellyace Bang st on all call angels itness Say, o can e feed your cildren en e can't even feed ourselves Moonrise I olding cicken for arm ear im troug all. Tey talking small not like whap whap Se say, It's teir ome e say, Wats a ome t a bare table Later after sounds like running I ear m say, Pck one. You can't feed to brds it a single stone Te lttle one's no eartly use not rigt in te ead
Th e Ta le of o f t h e C o t ta g e
After moter cry and gone quiet like sleeping I old my ead like apple sake it for see at sick Sound all rigt Never can tell Morning untman let us come too into oods for rabbits broter and me I dance like appledust. Trees come ticker round till no sky left He tell broter go look at snare He sit me beind tree for game Make little re give bread say No sound good girl I suck bread soft and ait for tem come back Cold. Sound like cros Good girl Want ome Cry Lots ours later re gone small Hear feet tink maybe lost fater coming it acorn teet and ivy ere eyes ere Try run fall on root. Broter it as istling I call out Dont cry little nut I found you Ill bring you ome e say Tice as old and ten times as clever I put legs round aist and old on Hut sne ligt I feared Stop at door Seem like dark inside Broter 1 3 5
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ay Home agai little e. Lift latc moter cry cry like appy Hutma agered ay Wy did you get yourelf lot you alfwit girl He ot remember game No food o table Moter face wet alty Nigt tey talkig low agai Broter leepig pu oy cicke away put ear o wall Hutma ay You wat to watc tem tarve? You wat to wait till te cramp buckle tem up? Moter cry Nooooo like puced out He oft voice ow ay Do't take o o woma Do't gt fate You ca ave more we time are good agai tik of avig more more food more re more oe till leep Morig moter ot get up wat ito r wit Hutma ay Wood agai today Walk lot our. Were tree ticket e make mall re ay Ret ow like good cildre wile go deeper i to cop wood for a wile Broter wat go wit Hutma ay 136
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Look after your iter or Ill beat te kin o you We ait Lot our later tree o tick no ligt at all outide r e Sound like olve Fire tiny Broter go for ood I cry o e come back curl round me Warm fart. Ten no re He ay Dont orry alfint Ill bring you ome a oon a it get ligt Wake all covered no cold lauging Tro ball broter Home ome ome like ong loud troug no Wen broter ake face like old bread Say e can't nd ay en all ite I ay Follo me dance like no ome to moter. Sno ticker feel like no feet no and no noe Broter follo me cry try ide it Get dark again Broter go u tree ee i ide de round Sliter Slit er don a ay Tere Tere a ligt little loaf We alk alk alk Wen ground di all dark again I not cry I not cry Broter nd ligt again. Wen e ee u cloe dazzle I tink
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morng. Wen e see cottage I tink dreaming Windos sine ike sugar als bron like gingerbread. Broter say, Home Not ome. Ten broter say, Come I feared I knon ormy apples it siny skin. I seen rotted teet beind andsome beard Broter go knock knock Wen door open I tink moter ten no. Young Woman say, Wat brougt you ere No ords from broter no ords from me Woman say Stop ere it me tonigt and no arm i touc you. Bed so soft I tink ot sno Se ake me boing on nose. I tel er alls gingerbread Se say, And te door is toee and te cimney is icorice and te beds are cocolate I not kno ords Laug anyay Se make pancakes to eac me er and broter. Her eyes red like crying Face smoot ike girl We can stay if ork Se kno al tat gro in oods. Se kno o tak rabbits into big cage in kitcen so never 1 3 8
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starving Broter cop logs laug like gron man ask kiss get slap Se teac me roll doug for baking into sapes of oman tree star Only bad nigts Wrap round broter like bread before oven Very quiet say ome like ould get me tere One nigt broter gone out bed I look sugar crystal indo No steps in moon sno all salloed up Too feared to cry Ten oman scream like moter old nigtmares say, Get out of my bed Broter fall on loor Say Just for a arm Se it someting Broter say Lonely Morning oman ake me stroking say Bonny red ceeks at ill e do I look broter out axing ood Bake bread say I Se lauging Days on days go by sno srinks to noting I dance like ite oers pusing troug cold eadrst Broter as air cin instead of smile Woman make im cop all trees died in inter till ands red like robins. I pick moldy seeds from good 39 �
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One day e baking broter alk in call er name I never eard lift er skirt beind Woman no scream tis time Put skinning knife to cin make drop of bood till e get in rabbit cage e lauging as se cain it I auging I feared. e sake cage. It od fast Nigt I cold so oman let me in it er Make ike se not ear broter souting I say e cold Se say Not for long I sleep arm beteen arms Wake up understanding se go to skin im like rabbit Slip into kitcen eart banging like curn Broter sleep till I nd key in draer open cain put and over mout. e climb out stretcing Come on e isper Youre safe it me ittle nut Not safe anyere e sake my ead to ake it Dont you understand No te sno is gone I can nd our ay ome to moter No I crying quiet ome not ome if moter not moter 1 4 0
Th e Ta le of t h e C o t ta g e
But you cant stay ere ses mad, ses got a knife Take my cances I say e look for long ile ten nod I gve im fres bake loaf sape like me. Tell im no come back it untman gun No come back ever I atc im run troug trees Sno begin falling cover tracks I lean ead in door at for oman to ake
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ti eaf itte gir, blackened under te now It a died o it wi be born again on te branc in pringtime Once I wa a tupid gir; now I am an angry woman Sometime you mut ed your kin to ave it Tere wa a king tere wa a queen e wa a ric a e wa beautifu Tey were a good a tey were appy Tey ived in a paace on te edge of a vat foret were te eave never fe Tey were wrapped up n
5
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eac oter like a nut in its sell Te only strange ting about tis king as tat is favorite of all te slendid beasts tat snorted and tossed teir eads in is stables as a donkey it losided ears Te rincess as alloed to stroke te creatures ears on feast days, but never to ride er Wen say te rincess suose am referring to myself toug ave come suc a long ay from tat little girl tat can ardly recognize er remember tat ad golden air lily ceeks and ruby lis just like my moter kno used to run in te garden and muddy my ankles I liked to sli out of te alace grounds and visit a cottage in te evergreen forest An old oman lived tere o earned er bread by er needle and by gatering erbs for medicines used to call er my loeroman because er face as dry like a oer ressed in a book Wen te queen took sick as good queens do te king sent for ysicians 1 46
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from east and est far and ide. I overeard te maids talking about it I asked to look at my moter but tey told me to go and play By te time te pysicians arrived, troug te rst drifts of sno, se as past ope My fater's knees ere planted at er bedside like pine trees I sa im troug a crack in te door Sno fell n te palace like a sroud tat nigt, and in te spring te lilies stood tall on er grave Te king as still locking imself aay every day to lament He ad is favorite donkey brougt to im, and ept into er ide until it as soaked; e slept beteen te animals legs eac nigt His courtiers breated troug teir mouts Fearing is mind as disturbed tey urged im to nd a ne ife For te sake of is subjects, for te sake of te princess for is on seet sake He sook is ead from side to side as if to sake grief loose No one could compare to is queen e belloed at tem: 7 .
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ere ould e nd aga suc golden air, suc iy ceeks, suc ruby ips Finally e let tem bring in te por traits e stared at Flemis prncesses and Spanis nfantas, Engis ducesses and even an empress from beyond te sea But toug one ad yello air and anoter ite ceeks and anoter red lips, not one of tem ad all tese at once, so te king smased eac picture in turn against te alls of is room Te donkey brayed in panic, and stove in te side of te trone it er ooves Te king tore te air from one canvas, te ceeks from a second, te lips from a tird, and squeezed tem togeter in is and. Te minged ols of man and beast traveled along te corridors Te coering courtiers eld permed andkerciefs to teir noses so as not to catc te king' s madness is food as set on a god tray outside is door. After te deat of my moter, I gre paler and taler. My curves prickled as 1
Th e Ta le f t h e S k in
tey seled my limbs urt from stretcing. Not all te oeromans erbs coud make me seep troug te nigt. One day as aking troug te palace en eard a moan stared at te door and remembered tat te king as my fater I picked up te eavy god tray and brougt it in to im Te king as as airy and grimy as te donkey aseep beside im e looked up as if te eavens ad opened I cleared my troat ere is your dinner e peered closer To tink tat al tis time te anser as under my nose, e ispered I gave im a doubtl smile Tell me, do you love me Of course Te ords barey ad time to eave my mout ave been aiting too ong, cried my fater, and ten e dased te tray from my and and pressed is mout to mine Bols spun like sno, goblets sattered like ail I kne tat 1 9
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sometig as very rog e pleated me alog te legt of is body i a ay o oe ad ever doe before e eld me at arm's legt ad said Suc ruby lips suc lily ceeks suc golde air is all my eart desires You ill be mie agai ad more ta ever before By te time I got out of te room my dress as tor i tree places I smelt of dirt ad fear ad sometig I didt uderstad. I rapped myself i a cloak ad ra to te loeroma's cottage Te courtiers ad it proclaimed tat te kig's mid as uiged; i a sort of akig dream e tougt imself to be youg agai ad te pricess to be er moter i virgi form; a atural mistake Tey urged me to stall to let im court me ile tey set for better pysicias from farter aeld; it could do te poor ma o arm Tey spoke of compassio but I ke tey ere terried Eac afteroo I ould be called to te kig's camber it a maid for a caperoe Some days e called me 1 5 0
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daugter oters, lover oters, is beauty He sometimes let me comb te lice from is air His starving ips ould make teir ay from te tips of my ngers to te crease at my elbo He ould serenade me on is knees, fan over my foreead and eep in my lap His ords, sometimes in languages ad never eard lled up te room till couldnt breate So matters continued for a mont f oved im, te king himpered, y ould not lie don in is bed Te courtiers insisted tat continue to humor im Te oeroman told me o to in myself a little time. ad never played te petuant princess, but set my mind to it no told im, You have torn my dress need anoter before marry you ould you take me for a beggar ill ave one as gold as the sun Te king lauged out loud He sent is courtiers to inquire troug te oe kingdom The only needle tat could 15
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make suc a dress belonged to te oeroman. Se orked t suc metcu ous deta tat anoter moon passed, and as stll safe On te day te god dress as n sed, I put t on and danced a altz for te kng Te donkey brayed n tme t te musc But en e ould ave let don my ar, I backed aay and tod m, need anoter drss before marry you; ould you take me for a vagabond l ave one s slver as te moon Te kng capped s ands He sent s courters back to te oeroman Se orked t suc tender care tat anoter to moons passed, and I \as st safe On te day te slver dress as nsed, put t on and danced a poka for te kng Te donkey apped er lopsded ears n tme. But e n e ould ave sezed me n s arm s, I backed aay and told m, need anotr dress before marry you; ould you take me 1 2
The ale f the Skin
for a oman of te roads I ill ave one as gittering as te stars. Te king caused a fanfare to be blon. He sent is courtiers back to te oeroman Se orked t suc in nite sloness tat anoter tree moons passed, and I as stil safe On te day te glittering dress as nised I put it on and danced a mazurka for te king But en e oud ave lifted my skirt, I backed aay I ad one last request, and ten ould marry im Give me a cloak, I said, made of te ide of tis donkey is face fell into itsef, crumbed like a rotten pine cone. I amost softened Winter is tigtening its grip on te paace, I cried Would you ave me colder tan tis dumb beast Would you grudge me at te least of your brute subjects ears Would you ave me go naked against te ind My fater ung is ead I ept into my pillo tat nigt, 5 3
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fom elief Te kingdom migt be tuned upside don, but I ould be safe no I listened to te fao sceam of te ind Te king came to my oom at st ligt, and spead te skin befoe me, still am it blood. His gin ung in folds as e said, Tomoo sall be ou edding. All tat day I stayed in my oom I clung to te blanket and said to myself, You'e a gon gil no Wose tings appen in te stoies Tee must be ose usbands He is not a goblin, o a bea, o a monste He is only you fate, and mad And ten I suddeed and tougt to myself, e could kill me. I belong to im as suely as tat donkey did. He could skin me like e as skinned is beloved beast, and o could stop im I bent my ead and ept until te blanket an it ain But my old oeoman came to me in te nigt, as I lay aake You 15
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mu y now e wipered alone in diguie into ome ditant and were no one know your name Se blackened wit oot tat cured golden air toe lily ceek and ruby lip e owed me ow to rub dirt under my nail I took my ree brigt dree my moter' weding ng and te donkey kin wrapped round me to ward off curiou glance t mel of blood and it but it kept me warm Lying curled up in ditce and cave nigt after nigt I oped te predator woud take me for a rotten carca Te tar looked down on me and lauged Wa ti freedom I wondered Wa ti better tan a trone A I drifted from my fater' kingdom into te next following te caravan of day I ed every layer of pride. air began to grow in unexpected place. It ung about my face like a tornbu; eed and inect clung to my ead I began to learn te leon of te a Eat anyting tat doen't move Snatc 55
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any armt gong Suer and endure kept moving only because ad noere to stay Cildren in tny villages tre old boots at my ead, called me Stinkng Donkeyskin. lved on at begged or stole ad meant to sell my dresses, but found couldnt part it tem; tey ere te only brigtness ad left. e rst mont of nter, my soes felt like iron; by te trd, tey ad orn out didn't notce losng tem on te road at last; my feet ere as ard as te scraps of soe leater by te time tey sld o ad never felt so ugly, or so faint, or so strong ad lost count of te moons by te tme came to a strange kngdom ere te trees ere not green e rst time sa te turnng of te leaves t beldered me; tougt t migt be te end of te orld Not even te oeroman could make a dress as brigt as ts destruction. tougt some invisible re must be burnng eac leaf from te outside in; could see te green 5 6
Th e Ta le f t h e S in
ves retreating before te crisp tide of ame Wen leaves fell on me I staggered out of teir ay More colors tan I ad names for covered my feet as I alked At nigt I slept on piles of crackling leaves, strangely comforted tat all tings ere saring in my fall My last nigt of vagabondage or freedom, felt like any oter I curled up in a ollo tree to keep out of te ind. I as oken at dan by te jangle of te unt Catc it alive if you can, came te cry Te dogs ad sniffed me out. Te untsmen ept it laugter en I limped into te ligt Tey carried me roug te crackling forest, over te river, as a living tropy for teir prce No I as back in te land of te living, I could smell my on loliness Wo are you asked e prince, glancing up from is leaterbound book A poor donkey itout moter or fater Wat are you good for 1 5
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Noting but to ave boots tron at my ead e as te most andsome man ad ever seen e seemed amused by my ansers and rearded me it a corner in te kitcen n return for asing disclots peeling turnips and raking ases ad te rigt to sleep Te animal in me as glad of te re but ated to ear te eavy bolt slide ome last ting at nigt Te turnspits joked so coarsely could barely understand tem One of tem it a face like a cabbage tried to nd out at as beind tat airy ide of mine but brayed like a mad donkey and e backed aay At last it as spring and te air softened Tere came a feast day en as released from my duties an dered troug te empty kitcen after dinner A roundbellied copper pot ung on te all; caugt sigt of my on face in it and inced Don by te river dropped my eavy skin and rinsed te past aay Te 1 5
Th e Ta le f t h e S k in
comb urt me but I as glad of ts teet My moters eddng ring slid easily onto my tin n ger I dre te golden dress from my pack, sook out ts creases and danced for my on reecton tll t seemed te sun ad come up tice Next I tred te slver dress spnnng to make te brds tnk it as moonrse Fnally I slpped over my ead te dress tat glttered lke te stars Even itout lookng I kne myself to be beautil My far ar loed brgt as te river I as a prncess again, rigt don to my slm toes in teir sning slppers From te castle, musc entced my footsteps No one callenged me en I entered te ballroom: te dresss magc opened every door Te prnce folloed me t s dsbelevng eyes and asked me to dance, tree tmes n a ro It seems to me tat e ave met before, e sad but I only trled faster Tere is sometng so oddly famlar about you, e sad and yet you are unque, a san among tese common ducks 159 �
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I lauged and began o e im so ies of my on kingdom I as ike a miacle o be speaking aloud again o say moe an ee ods a a ime I sipped aay en e asn looking Don by e ive I dessed myself in ags again and muddied my face and nais I coudn sop smiling Te nex day I expeced o be e as of my ime of ia Wi a ig ea I e bones o e dogs and scubbed fa fom e oo; beind my donkey skin I alked like a queen I kne e pince mus be seacing evey oom evey inc of e casle fo is missing beauy Te kicen as bubbling ove i gossip abou e sange's golden ai ily ceeks and uby lips I kne exacy a oud appen; my eas ee picked fo e oya sep on e sai I as evening by e ime e couies eaced e boom of e casle I ad gavy and ou on my ceeks bu fanfaes in my ea I did 1 6 0 �
Th e Ta le of t h e S k in
not even look up as te royal party made teir ay troug te kitcens lifting teir robes above te dirt As kne e ould te prince stopped and said Come ere girl His eyes must ave fallen on my moter's edding ring a tick band of gold tat no amount of soot could ide looked up at im it a int of amuse ment Wo are you A poor donkey repeated Wat brougt you into tis kingdom Fear and need He as staring no as if trying to see past te layer of grime smiled to make it even easier for im My features ad not canged since yesterday; my voice as as seet as ever if e could only ear it. nside my ead said look at me. Make me beautil in your beolding Te princes eyes narroed Was e drugged tat e couldnt ear my eart calling to is Surely e 1 6 1
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ould kno me all at once, any minute no, and burst out lauging at te ab surdity of all suc disguises He sook is ead, as if collecting is its, and turned back to is courtiers Was I tempted to cry out, to de clare myself It never seemed to me, tinking about it afterard, tat tere ad been any cance, any time, anyting ort saying. I listened as courtiers ascended te stairs, discussing ic kingdoms teir prince sould send messengers to in searc of te mysterious princess I sayed yet stood Wen everyone else ad nised teir ork and left te kitcen, I remained, a ollo tree resing to fall My ring I dropped in te royal soup bol for im to coke on Te gold and silver and starry dresses I left scattered by te river let im tink is lost beauty droned Te donkey skin I pulled tigtly around me as I set out for ome. Not on te ole lengt of my rney ould I see any man alf so 62
Th e Ta Ta le f t h e S k in
handome Through the long night in ditche and hollo tree I could not help thinking of him I kne by no he ould be ickening for love The phyician ould be ordering the cook to prepare rare delicacie, but all in vain If he gueed hi mitake, if he anted me back, I thought, let him uer and ork for it a I had orked and uffered Let him follo me over a mountain of iron and a lake of gla, and ear out three ord in my defene But at my truet, lying aake trying to count the tar, I kne my prince ould not follo In my mind eye I a him in hi palace, troking the gold and ilver and tarry dree hich ere fading no like leave in inter, eeping for a potle prince ho did not exit, ho had droned in the river of time The king I had once called father had died childle and frothing, I learned over a beggar campfire The throne a no occupied by a ditant couin The oeroman a tanding 1 6 3
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ousde my coage a ner day, as if expecg me Se as a lile older, bu sll smiling. Se gave me a drnk o ear my ead se ased me in scened aer se pu pu o n me m e a ne ne dress o f ome omesp spun un ool Se ook me m e o e king' s grave grave ere e spread e donkey skin, cracked and frayed I ddn need i any longer le keep im arm Tese ere my fee, balancing lke a as Ts as my and, e color of a rose I looked don and recognized myself.
< e fe THE
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I as te age tat you are no, I ad never done a our's ork Tere as noting I kne o to make or mend I as innocent o all eort; I as blank as a page As a cild in my parents manor I used to play a game because I kne no better. I ould alk into te kitcens ten minutes beore dinner and lit my little and Stop, I ould call at te top o my voice And tey alays did o ell te turnspit made a gargoyle o -
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imself o carefully te cook stilled te ladle alfay to is lips; o obe diently te maid eld te soup tureen until er face gre scarlet Only en clicked my ngers migt te servants slump into ordinary life again like grum bling giants oken from teir sleep of ages ad many games, but tat one as te best Tey ad no coice te turnspit and te cook and te maid My fater alays told tem is little beauty as never to be crossed My moter said no one as ever to make er baby cry You see before tey ad me tey ere bot so old tey tougt for sure tey ere barren Tey sore compli cated vos salloed medicines made from boiled frogs, and ent on pilgrim ages for monts at a time At last, lke a gift from above, my moter gre big and my fater put a cicken in te pot of every family on our estate Te day as born tey lited me into my fater's ands, and e roared out so all could 168
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hear Ths s my beloved daughter n hom I am ell pleased From the very rst day of lfe I ore gold mesh gloves so that nothng ould ever sol my ngers When I as a baby they told me I used to try to tear them o but soon I gre placd and lad my hands across my belly lke jeeled fans For many years I ddnt learn to alk because I as carred everyherenot by my parents ho had gron fral but by the most surefooted of the servants Gratel reorks erupted every month on the date of my brth The only lesson I had to learn as the lst of my vrtues: ho my face as the farest my t the sharpest my heart the most angelc my sngng the most comparable to a lark's n all the land Everyone ho set eyes on me fell n love th me I as told And I beleved every ord of t Why oud they have sad t unless t as true I as content I suppose though havng no bass for comparson I couldnt 1 6 9
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be sure t felt more like sleep tan joy Te manor ad a drosy air to t Even te re seemed azy as it ate aay at te ogs Wenever asked a queston tat began it y oud be tod tat tings ere done just as tey ad aays been done for a undred years before Wat reason could tere be to cang Our manor as surrounded by a ide ring of gardens in c sometng as alays in oer and someting ese n fruit Beyond tat stood a uge bramble edge ts blades so tickly knitted tat en stood near t could see only cinks of blue ligt from te outsde ord No one ever ent outside if tey coud elp it Hadnt e everyting e needed ere About ts tme as becomng restless Te year before and every year before tat ad been peacel but tis year as grong, my ngers lengtening and straning against ter gold nets As te cilds ines of my body ere forced into curves, my mind began
Th e Ta le f t h e N e e d l e
to ite; it as as if some unseen and as nudging me, magicking me into a sape tat as not my on I kept asking fo a kitten of my on to play it, even toug my paents alays said it migt ut me Poisonous feelings used toug me it no aning Geed, en tee as noting I lacked Ange, en I ad noting to esent Despai, en I as te luckiest gil in te old. I tougt I kne evey oom in te castle, aving spent my cildood andeing up and don its many staicases taking te feedom of eac scuey, galley o bedcambe But one day I as out in te ose gaden playing it my golden oop fo lack of anyting else to do en I looked back at te tall gay toe and ealized tat I ad neve been up tee No doo as locked against me but I ad neve found a staicase tat led to te toe Its nao dos seemed to ink at me Wen one evening afte dinne I asked my mote to take me up to te
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toer my parents looked at eac oter ts all sut up tere my fater said; its not safe Come ere said my moter ll tell you a story instead. Se bent don and took me on er lap toug my feet almost touced te oor Te only stories ere family stories and tey ere all te one story As my moter told it could see it unfolding like a dusty tapestry silted up it memory Ho my greatgrandmoter ad long fair air and married a prince and ad ve cildren and lived appily ever aer in tis very manor ouse Ho my greatgreataunt embroidered clot of gold and married a duke and ad four cildren and lived appily ever after across te mountains Ho my grandmoter ad deep blue eyes and married an earl and ad tree cildren and lived appily ever aer in tis very manor ouse Ho my greataunt danced like a sparro and married a baron and ad to cildren and lived appily ever aer across te seas Ho my moter married my fater and ad me 1 2
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I liked to consider tis long story and o it led all te ay to me as a pat inds to a mountaintop It sooted me for a ile it made me feel tat I as in te rigt place te only place to be. But te orms of discontent ad got into my veins someo. I kept asking about te toer no matter o tey tried to fob me off Ten one evening after dinner I demanded tat my fater take me beyond te bramble edge and my parents stared at eac oter Tere's noting out tere you need to see said my moter; its a cruel orld ll of evil men Hus said my fater dont frigten te cild He bent don and asked Would you like a kitten instead It as black and ite te softest ting Id ever laid ands on I as my on more precious tan all my golden toys I cosseted and carried it everyere for a eek before it turned and scratced me. My moter sa te mark on my rist and eld out er and for te kitten
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I aited all day for er to gve it back e scratc ardly urt at all any more. Wen tat ngt at dinner I asked after my kitten, my parents looked at eac oter It got lost said my fater It asnt a ktten anymore said my moter; it as turning nto a dirty cat I found out from te maid tat tey'd given it to te manservant and told im to dron t n te ell My parents lavised even more af fecton on me My moter stroked my ar as se passed me in te corrdors. Every tme I came nto te room my fater ould open is arms and ask eter I ad a smle for Papa today It as ten tat I began o ll up t rage. I as lke a cloud tat toug its face stays te is sloly collectng its load of tunder and rain One day I as trying to make out te pctures on an old all angng in te est ing en it billoed as if possessed. I leapt back A maid emerged @ 1
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from beind it carrying an empty cup and plate Se looked started to see me but bobbed a curtsey and urried aay From beind te anging came a faraay sound at coud ave been laugter, or te ca of a cro I as moving closer en I eard te du gong calling me to dinner Ten next day I retraced my steps; te anging pulled back to reveal a eavy ooden door locked fast I put my ear to it but eard noting Wat I did next soed a strange cunning for a girl o ad never ad anyting to ide I bided my time until tere came a day en my parents ere alking in te garden, pointing out te bes roses to eac oter. I took my moters keys from ere tey ung, slipped aay to te est ing and aited in te sados for at felt ike an our Eventually te maid came out bearing at looked like a camberpot, eaving te door unlocked beind er. I took te stairs one by one, oddly 1 7 5
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frigtened of at tey migt lead to Round and round tey spiraled; tis ad to be te toer As I mounted I began to ear singing Te voice as faint and sligtly cracked, but of an indescribable seetness Te singer used ords I didnt kno, ords like hungry ocean grave didn't kno at se meant, but er song made me cry. I forgot all my sorro en I peeped into er room. Tere se sat, an old oman I ad never seen before, er ands moving in and out of er song Dirty ite air ung about er face like ivy Only en te last note as breated out did se look up Se didn't speak, only atced me like a cat I cleared my troat Wat is tat ting tat irls so I asked, for someting to say Noting but a spinning eel, se ansered it some amusement And tat Have you never seen a distaff No, I told er 176
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o do you tink tread gets spun, girl? I don't kno Wat do you suppose your dress made of? I ave never gven te matter muc tougt I said stiy Se eld ou te dista Wrap your ands around te lengt of tat no, se said And se oled it laugter as if a some joke I ad missed I alked past er to te indo Te sill as tick it dust; ligt sparkled in a cobeb From ere could see far beyond te bramble edge Tere as at looked like a river, and a fe lines of little ouses and in te distance great purple tings I tougt must be mountans I as so involved in identifying tese tngs from pictures ' d seen tat I didnt notice te old oman get up I can ell you're cuous se said strecing er arms above er ead Se aved at te stool
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Clearly e ad no idea o a mut not do any ort of ork told er Wy tat ten am delicate I explained it a int of everity Delicate my are! e aid. Wat do you mean by tat blinked at er. Wat i an are Ti i e aid tepping cloer and giving me a ligt mack it er open and recoiled My eye bulged mut go no, told er Wat tere to urt you in a bit of ork te old oman aked mutnt told er urgently. My moter ay my fater ay . er face a merry no longer. Se put one foot on er tool and leaned cloer iten, girl e aid teyve tried to top me teacing any of te ting kno No teyre trying to prevent you from learning all te ting you dont But gift can only be delayed.
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dont kno at you mean I aid oarely Look at toe long pinter nger! e exclaimed Youre made for it. Take o toe fooli glove for a moment examined my ite and troug te me But I migt dirty tem Se made a rude ound it er lip Wat do you kno of dirt little pre ciou addled up in gold ince te day you ere born O ye ve eard of you; te maid bring up at ne tere i You ave everyone in ti catle alking on tiptoe for you dont you After a moment gave a mall nod Not a baby i alloed to cry, e drove on, not an old man alloed to coug for fear youd ear All toe it rinkle or even a touc of a limp are kept out of your igt for fear teyd adden you Tere cannot be dut anyere, or a aing tub, or a ingle pider I a ditracted by a faraay tudding It eemed to come from te bottom
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of te stars Were tey scourg te ouse for me Wake up, prncess, snapped te od oman, cappng er ands n front of my nose A tear began to e up n my eye but ed t back None of at you say as of my coosng, tod er cody as a cd And no No am amost a oman, ent on my voce sprang, and f ad my ay Se et te sounds tra aay before sayng, Yes f you ad your ay ddnt kno at to say sat don abrupty on er grmy stoo After a e put my and to te ee se soed me ere set t n moton Tere as a ong moment of gorous rng and ten fet te neede drve tsef nto my nger screamed ke a baby Te od oman eaned over me, cradng me, usng me Her ar as soft ke oo sucked te drop of bood
Th e Ta le of t h e N e e l e
from my nger never kne it ould taste so like silver. er voice as saking tougt se migt cry and stared up at er, but ten realized tat se as rocking it laugter soved er aay o dare you Tat alays appens te rst time, se said troug er merriment Every tme You kne baled Not at all No one knos te ture. reaced out and kicked er spin ning eel into te corner Badness as running troug my veins like ine ate you soutd You sit ere in your dust, your foul mess . . ll ave you punised could ave your ead copped from your soulders But at a mess tat ould make se murmured stared at er My eyes ere sollen it ater My ead felt as if it ere about to break open like an egg Te old oman gave me a most pe culiar smile 1 8 1 .
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I hear feet pounding the stairs, and a call that ; unded like my name I turned to the door and pulled the bolt across All of a sudden I felt quite awake. I bent over for the spinning wheel and set it back in its place I sat down on the stool and said, Please Show me how
@ 182 .
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te days en ising as aving I got at I ised and ten I ised I adnt Ill make no excuses; I as a gron oman en it appened to me Id al ready ripped out my rst gray air and resed to neigbors sons o tougt tey could ave me for te asking Id learned every song my moter could teac me I as standing in te market te day I sa im. I stopped trying to sell my 1 8 5 .
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faters bagl of s stared at te stranger for ours, across baskets of salmon and te sifting backs of cattle but e never glanced my ay He stood at te side of is mercant fater like an angel come don to eart. All te neigbors sa me atcing, but at did tat matter no His eyes ere black like ink mine blue as te sea. His ands ere pale, gripping purse and quill mine ere scored red it s scales His boots looked like tey never touced te ground; my toes ere caulked it mud He as as strange to me as satin to sackclot, featers to lead, a eron to a erring Up to tat day must ave been appy Happy enoug, at least, never to onder eter as or not My sisters didnt use suc language as e gossiped over our gutting knives and iped isps of bron air out of our eyes it te backs of our ands. My moter en se took a eavy basket from my arms, never searced my face My fater s eyes 186
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ere cloudy as e exed is ngers by te re Smiling as for Sundays Te morning after sa tis man in te marketplace oke up sick to my stomac and decided as in love f didnt coose im, o as ten times better tan any d ever set eyes on, d never coose f tis asnt love, ten it ould never appen. All te signs said it as as mulis and quarrelsome I turned up my nose at cold porridge, and let my sisters nis te pickled cod And te strangest ting: en lay tat evening at te green edge of te crumbling cli belo our cottage, facing into te mist, couldnt sing a note My troat seemed stopped up it te tougt of im Tis man as everyting asnt, adnt, couldnt Grace as in is smoot boots, and sunligt ran along beind im His collar gleamed like a alo; e made me tink of trumpets, and orses, and te las of ig gates f couldnt ave im, d ave noting 187
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Wic as all too likely e as gone back to te city and no one kne ad ever been to te city Tey said bad tings appened tere But noting bad could appen to a man like tat; te city ould be a garden at is feet Women ould bloom at te sigt of im Even if ent tere at could say at could do Wat ould dra is lips don to my salty skin So ent to te itc as desperate girls do Everyone kne ere se lived in a cave on te eadland ad never been tere before; ad never needed anyting tey said se could give Te sermen told all sorts of stories about er tat er cave as lined it te bones of droned sailors it skeleton legs for a door skeleton ands for bolts and a ll mout of teet for a lock Tey said tat se fed sea snails from er on mout and as an octopus belo te aist One of tem claimed to ave seen er once taking a bat in a little pool it er tentacles spilling over te 188 �
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rocks They claimed she could turn men to lm sh th a single glance of her atery eye Anyone ho climbed as high as the mouth of her cave ould freeze there on the rock untl the itch hobbled don and magicked him into a gull to heel and scream for eternity They said so many thngs about her, they couldnt all be true Girls in trouble ere not ut o by stories Still, my breath labored in my chest as I climbed along the headland My hands shook a little hen I stoed outside the cave She as there before I realized it she had been standing in the shados She as everything I half exected a stoo, a stick, a art on her nose, a hisker on her chin er hite har had a trace of red like old blood on shee's ool er nails curled like roots er eyes ere oysters in their shells, and her voice had the crackle of old nets And yet she surrised me Is he orth it she asked 19 .
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Wort at? Te climb? Wat climb? se said dismissively meant te price He's ort any pce, said, steadying my breat. Glad to ear it studied er suspiciously Ho did you kno about im? asked Tere's alays a im, se pointed out A girl comes ere for tree reasons. To catc im, to quicken is blood, or to bring on er on He's not a s , to be caugt, said angrily. So tat's it. Te itc yaned, bearing a fe black teet Tell me no, at ould you do for im? stopped to tink. f e as droning, said sloly, suppose 'd jump in te sea to save im 'd forget fater and moter and sisters for is sake 'd 'd eave nettles it my bare ands Not particularly usel in tis case Se siged No point my telling you e's not ort it, suppose 190
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Youve neve seen im dont need to, little gil ve seen enoug men in my time Woeve e is, es not ot at youll pay But But can see by you face tat youe sick fo im f e as ugly as Lucife you'd still see te sun sining out of is beeces and te stas in te leavings on is plate No matte o geedy e may be youll tink eveyting belongs to im by igt No matte o stupid e is youll tink e conveses like an angel Am igt ave to ave im, told e coldly Good, good se said, a gil o knos at se ants Tell me no, o big a job ill tis be Does te man like you, at least lused a little tink so Se peeed close ve got a ng on my nge tat tells me if it eas a lie aven't spoken to im yet, said m a us 191 �
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Te itc made a ort bark could only tink a a laug tat a out of practice tared at er nger, bare of rg. Ti mut be love indeed, e aid, if you kno noting about im Ti mut be te real ting, if tere not a pinc of trut in te bre. Ti i te trut, outed ant to alk ere e alk To alk in i orld, don tere in te big city. For i eye to catc on me en m dancing. Go dance for im, ten; at topping you? No, aid, tamping my foot on te turf You mut cange me rt Make me better Make me rigt Make me like a oman e could love Se knotted er and in er frayed al Wat' rong it you, girl, tat you ould make yourelf over again? veryting Cange for your on ake, if you mut, not for at you imagine anoter ill ak of you. 1 9 2
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I'm doig te askig o I said A gull screamed; e atced a by After a momet, I asked, Is it ossibe, te Se tured er alms u to te sky Aytig's ossible It felt like a victory I stood u straigter I ave o moey today I told er but if you'l give me a little tme Se igored ta Itll cost you your voice, se said I stared at er You ot be able to laug or aser a questio to sout e sometig sills o you or cry out it deligt at te ll moo You ill eiter be able to seak your love or sig it it tat famous voice of yours But But you ill ave im Also se said ile I as sill takig a breat tere ill be a P ai n ? 9
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Like a sord cutting you in alf. You ill bleed for tis man. Yes, I said all in a rus, before my oter selves could stop me Te itc gave me a gentle smile Well done my cild Ten I ave cosen rigtly? Not at all. But I ave a eakness for brave fools Se looked around er for a tistle, came close to me and combed my air it it Ten se turned to go into te cave I stood like a stone, bedded in te eart Se looked over er soulder Yes? Don't you . dont I isnt tere someting e ave to do? Wat? se said earily Sould I make you vomit up your voice and bury it under te cliff? Pull it out of your mout like a silken rope and seal it in a jar? I tried again All I ant to kno is, en ill it appen? Se reaced out one lty nger and touced me ligtly on te troat It 1 9 4
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already as, se said Ten te sados around te cave mout took er in. I alked don te ill, my cold ears rgg At rst I could ardly believe tat te cange ad aened, but soon I ad roof My moter sa me acking my bundle, and asked a I as doing, but en I tried to anser er I found my troat as sealed tigt as a drum At last se understood and srank back on er stool One of my sisters turned angry, one mocked me anoter et as I set o from our cottage, eading into te mountas I alked and alked Wenever I ould ave liked to sing I counted see instead After a day I could no longer smell te sea On te tird day I im mersed myself in a mountain lake and en I steed out I as ite as te ind I ound ild roses in my air Men o assed me on te road turned teir eads to stare It as all true, te itc ad done at se romised. By 1 95
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the tme I reached the city I had no more fear I sold all I had for a ne dress that reached to the ground hispering as I alked Poer as ringing through my lovely body hat need had I of ords I found him easily by alking don the street of merchants to the tallest house and sitting on the steps After a hile he came out ith his father As soon as he sa me he laughed He said something to his father, and ran don to help me up. My feet ere ike ra meat, but my smile held his eyes He as just as I had remembered It as I ho had changed. When he oered me his hand I felt completely ne. e as sure hed seen me somehere before I as a puzzle to him After a fe days he began to call me his little foundling ho the ords ere seet to my ear He didnt seem to mind that I ansered all his questions ith kisses e gave me silk slippers for my feet, and a huge velvet cushion to sleep on
Th e Ta le f t h e V i c e
en e as busy it is ork. He took me to feasts and bals in castles and sips. Sopisticated omen lauged beind teir fans; took it as a sign of eaousy Cloted in is gaze, could not be put to same Wen e as not dancing it me, is eyes rested on me dancing And one nigt in absolute darkness my es opened and saloed im up He made a sound like a dog burned as if ere being spit in to as gad ad no voice to scream; ould ave oken te city couldn't alk for a day or to after. felt like some strange seaeed, ased up on my bloodied velvet cusion He as so sorry; e brougt me trays of seets At nigt folloing is ispers in te darkness, I began to learn about pleasure Every day oke up a ittle altered After a ie oud ave iked to ask en e ere going be married My eyes put te question, but all e did as
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kss tem sut Tat as te rt me I felt te loss of my voce But I as comg to realize tat my predcamet as ot uque. At te balls e took me to tere ere may beautl youg ome o dd't say a ord Tey asered every questo t a srug or a smle If campage got splt do ter dresses tey oly sged e te ll moo sld out from bed e castle tey atced t slece I could ot uderstad t Had tey sold ter voces too ve ter bodes ere slet, alays uprgt, ever looseg ter les. Tey alked lke letters o a page I ad o fear, te eveg my e lfe bega to fall apart I as dacg t all te grace I ad, appess stretced lke a scarf aroud my soulders. I tured to d s gaze, but for oce e as ot tere I alked troug te ball, my smle ufalterg Was e dg from me for a game Was e busy, peraps, tellg s freds about our eddg Te gt as arm 1 9 8
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scented it blosssoms On suc a nigt love sould be sung aloud Wen I found im on is back in te garden e as not singing but impering in deligt I couldnt see ic girl as on top of im er smoot ead as turned aay You ill laug to ear o socked I as. I ad so trusted te itcs bargain, I never tougt to onder o long it ould last Ho I ould like to be able to say tat I turned and alked aay, out of te ball and out of is life, stripping is presents from me step by step Instead I must admit tat I crouced tere, atcing for te little eternity t took Later I ent ome it im, as alays He read noting, it seemed, in my eyes; te nigt as dark Witout a ord from me or even a sake in my voice o could e tell my eart as cracking apart e velvet cusion under us as still soft My legs around is aist must ave been as arm as ever. 1 9 9
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Ho sould I blame im Ho as e to kno at matteed to me Peaps e get, not at e deseve, but at e demand His seet dumb little foundling asked so little of im, and tat little as so easy fo te es to give, y sould se get anyting moe Some nigts e came ome, some nigts not On one of te nigts e lay beside me, sleeping like a cild, it occued to me to kill im Tee as a knife in is belt, anging on te cai. It could all be ove in a moment If I dank fom is toat, migt it gve me back my voice Wete it as love o some ote eakness tat stayed my and I ill neve kno I stole aay befoe moning Afte a eek itout food I began to follo te only tade open to a od less gil Te men ee not as gentle as e ad been, but tey could do me no te damage. I eeled fom one day to te next, oking fo a moutl of food at a time Wat a s out of ate 2 00
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I was now, gulping on te cold streets as i every breat would be my last How could I stay ere Were else could I go I was betwixt and between spoiled or every lie I could ave lived. Always I would be restless now Always I would know wat I was missing I stayed troug te winter, long enoug to ll a jar wit my tears eir taste reminded me o te sea I never tougt I'd miss te smell o it, but nally, come spring, I did I didn't know ow to send a message; all I knew was te way ome e days o walking were like knives under my eet I made straigt or te witc's cave, and trew stones into its clattering darkness till se came out. I said you'd catc im, se remarked leaning on er stick as i we were resuming an interrupted conversation. I never said you'd keep im ere's no spell long enoug or tat I trew anoter stone it went wide Se didn't inc 2 0 1 �
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Your sisers ere ere pleading for you se said My eyes idened Tey sold me eir air Se le ou a snor I as eir idea i seemed o make em appy Teyve oven i ino a sal o keep me arm is iner I sared as se pulled e dark covering closer around er soulders. Tey asked me o bring you ome, se en on, and give you back your e I ried o speak bu couldn Se came a fe seps closer I don ave your voice, you kno se said sofly You do Te ins ere digging ino e inside of my ss Your songs are sill ou ere on e cliop anging in e air for you en you an em Se paused, searcing my face Wis o speak and you ill speak girl Wis o die and you can do i Wis o live and ere you are 2 0 2 �
Th e T le of t h e Vo i c e
I dont understand, I croaked at last My troat urt Se yaned Your silence as te cost of at you sougt, se said; it ad noting to do it me Wat ould I ant it your voice Te music you make as alays been in your on poer Ten y did you take my sisters air in excange Se smiled ickedly People never value at tey get for free. Having paid so dearly, your sisters ill treasure you no I gatered up all te monts of pain and spat It landed at er feet As trudged don to te village my ssters ran out to meet me Teir cropped eads soaked up my tears My moter ad no ords of greeting, only arms tron round me like ropes I atced my fater among te sermen bringing te boats in I ould never again leave tis arbor tat smelt like ome At te end of a eek my feet ad ealed By te next spring my sisters' 2 0 3
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ai ad gon long again Ye anote yea ent by and I maied a eman it geen eye o liked o ea me ing but pefeed to ea me alk
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at tey say about m" te gulls bring me al te gossip Knoing at tey say about you is te rst step to poer. Contrary to at you migt af beieve, am no monster under my skirts gre up in a place muc like tis one, toug af a year aay Wen as te age tat you are no as a girl ike you, toug not quite as stupid Tere as anoter dierence; my bleeding as meager, en it came, and by te time te coug carried off my W
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moter no longer bled at all. Tis gave me reason to tink about my ture. As far as my people ere concerned, omen like me ad no ture kne at tey tougt of omen past bearing unless tey ad sons to onor tem and daug ters to clean tem, tey ere old rags tossed in te corner A barren oman as ated even more; te ay tey sa it, se ad never earned a bite of bread. But as not going to become an old rag, en every air ad as still red as a lobster in te pot could of course ave lied and smiled, got myself a sturdy usband Te men ad started lurking near our door as soon as my moter as taken bad could ave sunk my nails into one, girded im to me and kept im oping and cursing year after year, even pointed te nger at some oter oman for looking crossays at me and exing my belly. But ouldn't stoop to tat So after tey buried my moter, I packed up all te erbs in er store and came aay 2 0 8
Th e Ta le f t h e K i s
I found myself a cave on a eadland, above a village like tis one Its tree onts ard alk from ere, but tey s and spin and make up lies ust like your folk Te cave ad been lived in before; tere as an old blanket, and a ater bag, and a dip in te oor olloed by many small r es. I ad rock to my back and te sea to my face driftood to burn and te odd s to fry I ad time to onder no, to unpick te knotted ropes of my tougts I could taste freedom like salt on te breeze Tere as no one to nurse, no one to feed, no one to listen to but my on self I tougt no one ould ever boter me again and I could live out my life like a gull, like a eed, like a drop of ater Wat I found instead as poer I never sougt it; it as left out for me to stumble over Only a matter of eeks ad gone by before I began to nd presents left outside my cave Te rst as a clutc of eggs; I tougt for a moment 2 9
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some extraordinary cicken ad on up to bring me dinner Next came a tick slice of meat rapped in a clot to keep te birds o Te villagers left teir of ferings at rst ligt before I stirred out of my cave I tougt suc goodness ad never been knon in te ole orld I tougt tese ere presents freely given to keep a stranger from starving Ho as I to kno tat tey ere payments in ad vance? It as a small boy o gave me te rst int He tre seaeed into my cave until I came out it a big stick He screamed en e sa me and ran until e fell over ten got up and ran again Wen e came back te next day e as braver He asked Wat appened to te old one? Te old at? Witc Have you got er locked up m er cave or did you boil er in er pot? Tis 1s my cave no I told im 2 1 0
The Tale of the Ks
sternly Teres no one ere but me So it as a itc tey ere anting lauged to myself, tat rst day, as te little boy ran don te eadland, but soon enoug learned o to be at tey needed t as not an arduous job Mostly tey left me alone it my erbs and my tougts, but every fe monts one of te villagers ould creep up te ead land after sunset and call out, Are you tere Are you tere te cave ould eco back at tem Will you elp me Te voice more strangled no, te eco saking ve brougt someting for you And only ten, en tey ere seating cold as de, ould emerge, step by slo step, a black scarf over my ead to ide te fact of my yout. Not tat tey ever looked at me properly; tey seemed to tink my eyes ould scald tem. Tey stared at te muddy ground ile tey poured out teir stories of
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ickne envy grief and unger I never aid a ord until tey ere obbing Sometime at tey needed a imple enoug. To te ick I gave po tion tat could do tem no arm and migt make tem ell if tey anted it enoug To te grieving gave ord of comfort and a drink to make tem leep. To girl it terrible ecret I gave erb to make tem ole again A for te guilty pilling teir burden of malice and ame outide my cave tougt at rt tat tey ere aking for forgivene but oon found it made tem uncomfortable Puniment uited tem better. Tey liked me to cure tem May eed pring up ere you alk! May a tail gro in te middle of your cin! Tere a a oman od never aid a kind ord to er uband ince e oke up te day after teir edding layed er it my tongue until e burt into tear and ran ome to make i breakfat. Tere a a man od not 212
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slep t for ten years for thinkng of what he had done to his own daughter told h im to sell every animal he had to make u her dowry Once there was a stranger who alf smiled as he told me the worst tn g he had done in his life, and then something worse than that and then something even worse let hm talk all night never said a word of judgment is eyes ickered on my face as he talked as if searching for something The sky lightened and was stll watching him. My eyes moved nearer to the cli edge, and just as the sun was comng up the stranger let himself fall into the ointed waves was a little shaken that day t was te rst time felt the reach of my power Power that came not from my own thin body or my own taut mnd but was invested in me by a vllage. Power ad to learn how to pick up wthout getting burnt, how to shae it and conc eal it and aunt it and use it, and wen to use t, and when to stll my breath 2 1 3
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and do nothing at all Power these scalyngered shwives and their wir y husbands could have used themselves, if theyd only known how, but instead they told themselves how helpless they were, and came and laid power t my feet As well as eggs, of course, and newbaked bread, and even gold coins if judged hat it would take a terrible price to make them believe in their cure And so the years passed, leaving little mark on me except the rst gray ngerprints on my bright head When the occasional petitioner came up the headland answered their questions with my eyes closed preferred the days when was alone could recognize the cry of each kind of bird they never changed All that was dierent about me was that every year my needs were fewer My bones grew hard as iron had trie d out every herb found, till nothing could surprise my stomach got so s ed to sleeping on stone that it no longer se emed hard to me rolled up in haf a dozen 214
The Tale f the Ki
bl anke ts and wrapped my arms round my rib s like pet snakes Noting touced me n te nigt except te occasonal spder was complete sould ave known You can't lve on a clff for tat long witout risking a fall One morng a woman climbed up to my cave before dawn could ear er feet scrabbling outside Te sun was ig in te sky before rewarded er patience by standing in te entrance er narrowed eyes distnguised me from e sadows, and se jerked back You want someting, told er, a lit tle oarsely; my voice was out of practice Se looked beind er for er basket don't fancy butter sad t was a lucky guess Se inced Te n wat will you ave? Te trut, told er er ands fougt like crabs ave a daugter se began A good strong redaired daugter but se is a trouble and a trial to me Before sunrse se's 2 1 5
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roamg the his. have a terribe fear she's ovesick She gets a stran ge ook in her eyes hen we're working catch her singing songs 've never heard before, and where coud she have got them? yawned, to hurry her up f you saw her you'd understand, the woman went on in a rush She's no foo, nor ide; it's ony this restessness She coud be the best of daughters, if she'd ony quiet down And her sisters? A gone This one's my ast you see, said the woman, her voice subsiding 'm not getting any younger need to know for sure that she' stay with me turned my face away wi con sut the oraces, tod her; that aways stunned them into sience Come back at moonrise on the third day and you wi have your answer That evening at sunset was sitting in front of my cave, consuting the ony orace knew the orange sky, when a man cimbed up the headand He s eem ed 2 1 6
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t tired t be afraid e std a little distance frm me Yu want smething, I said withut mving my head Yes. Is that a fresh trut in yur hand It is ss it ver the cli, I said, just t amuse mysef e paused a mment befre unwrapping it and thrwing it tward the setting sun A gu caught it with an incredulus shriek Out with the truth nw, I said is ft dug int the chaky grass I have a daughter he began. A ne tall redhaired daughter, but she is a trial and a truble t me af the evening she walks alng the beach by mnlight he gathers seashells ike a ittle child here's a friend f mine has an ee fr her but whenever he cmes curting shes behind her mthers sir ts in the kitchen I have a terribe fear shel end up an d maid 21
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My eyes were wandering f you saw er you'd understand e went on riously Se's no frigt nor feared of men it's only tis restlessness. Se'd make my friend a ne wife, if se'd only settle down, and ten e says e'd give me alf sares in is big boat. Wy not one of er sisters? All married is one's my last, you see, said te man, is voice beginning to crackle 'm not getting any younger need to know for sure tat se'll do wat say stared at te soundless gulls will consult te oracles told im Come back at moonset on te tird day and you will ave your answer e next morning woke wit my ead full of scragends of dreams doused it in seawater oday would need all my wits Between te moter and te fater ad to ick my way carelly. knew wat aened to meddlers wo came between man and wife knew tere were some in te village below wo, after 2 1 8
Th e T le f t h e K i
strog liquor, talked of blockig up my cave i the ight By midday rai had covered the headlad sat i my cave tryig to persuade my little re to stay alight At least bad weather kept me private shielded me from the village below with all its wearisome tribulatios Or so thought, util she appeared the mouth of my cave, betwee curtais of rai, the girl herself, umistakable, her bloodred hair glued to her wet throat t was the rst time i all those years that let aother huma beig step across the threshold eve let her a blaket to stop the shiverig To make up for this softess usheathed the blade of my togue f youre the girl thik you are, bega, starig ito the strugglig re, hear youre othig but trouble She odded as if had remarked o the weather ad cotiued combig out the red ropes of her hair with a bit of old comb 'd foud her 2 1 9
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oure not child enouh for your mother nor woman enouh for your father ou dont work or ply or think as they would have you work and play and think. She smiled at me with teeth lke quartz What are you ood at I dont know yet, said the irl, starin into the re Faint steam was risin from her What is it you want Nothin, she sad, half lauhin There is no creature under the sky that does not want, I told her severely Only what Ive ot, then, she said Thats lucky And time to think about what I want next I nodded udiciously. And time to just think Theres plenty of that up here, I remarked She stared round the cave here must be all the time in the world here, she said wonderinly. 2 2 0
Te Tale f te K
My hert ws beginning to thud And time to not think, I need tht too she dded I hd one more queston Wht do you love? She took dee breth s if her list ws long, then she let it out in sigh Everything she sid Everything? My voice ws squek ing bt ow cn you love everything before you know nything you idiotic girl? I don't know she sid seriously It seems to lek out of me It's like cu silling over. She turned to look into my eyes they nrrowed ginst her ow cn you not? she sked Wht? Youre wise You're the witch ow cn you look t everything nd know everything without love? My hert ws ulling on my ribs Go now, I sid. The rin's esed. She turned her oen fce to me But will 221 -
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Girl like you alay get ha t they at er llthroated laugh lled the cave for everal miute after hed gone That ight I didt lee at all The blaket ere heavy ith dam; the id eemed to hie at the cave mouh No matter hich ay I lay, toe oked me aake. If I took a fever ad lay toig here till I died, I realized, o oe ould ever ko. The villager ould till leave the odd bit of food outide, but it ould be eate clea by the bird Oly the id ould hear their etitio, ad erha 1t aer ould be ier tha mie Before the u roe I hauled myelf u off the oor. A log a I had my health the oer a mie I thre roemary o the re ad breathed i it clariig air By moorie I had cococted my aer To the mother I aid The oracle tell me that becaue of your o fault, a terrible cure ha bee viited uo 2 2 2
The Tale f the Ki
yo dghte f yo ee ode he to s t t home with yo, she will tn into e nd n o the montin. Dmbstck inside he shwl, the womn whiseed, s thee ny ce fo this cse? Only time will we 1t ot, told he wold tke no yment wtched he scy down the hedlnd st thee s the moon tcked its wy coss the sky nd begn to fll To the fthe sid The ocles tell me tht becse of yo own sins, dedfl fte hs fllen on yo dghte f yo ee ode he to my he hsbnd will tn into wolf nd deo he on thei wedding night Flinching fom the wods, the fthe sid, s thee ny wy of lifting this fte? Only time will tell, told him wold tke no yment wtched hi stide home And then ll ws qiet told myself tht the job ws well done. Oe the next few dys went bot 223
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my businss, but somthing was rong Evrything cookd tastd bittr y daiy tasks smd ong, and yt whn I sat by th r to rst in th vnings, th tim hung havy on my hands. coud mak no sns of what th gus wr saying Th gir cam back on day hadnt raizd it was hr was waiting for amost wishd it was raining again n sunight sh gowd as if hr hair had caught r stood in th mouth of my cav, and a at onc coudn't think of anything to say. Sh ut down hr baskt and crossd hr arms a itt nrvousy. wish knw whr you gt your owr, sh rmarkd. This ast wk my mothr and fathr hav t m work, s and wandr as as Thy mak no comaint or rdiction, cast nithr my ast nor my tur in my fac aowd a sma smi to tist my mouth. av you ut thm undr a s? sh askd 224 �
he ale f the Ki
An easy one; you could learn it yourself She remembered her basket I bro ght you something No need Its only butter. I made it myself I dont want butter. It g1ves me a rash I said the lie coming easily to my lips Whatll you have then? she said Because I owe you A kiss. I think I asked it just to shame her I would have iked to see that calm face furrow up for a moment But the girl laughed Anger began to clamp my teeth shut er laugh rippled on Is that all? she asked Why are they all so afraid of yo when your price is so easy to pay? Even then I didnt believe she woud do it. Kissing a witch is a perilous busine s Everybody knows its ten times as dagerous as letting her touch your hand or cut your hair or steal your shoes 2 2 5
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What simler way is there than a kiss to give ower a way into your heart She steed u to me and her hair swung around us like a veil t was a bad idea, that kiss asked for Not that it did the girl any harm She walked o across the hills as if she had just embraced a cat or a sarrow Once she looked behind her and waved On the whole am inclined to think that a witch should not kiss. Perhas it is the not being kissed that makes her a witch; erhas the source of her ower is the breath of loneliness around her She who takes a kiss can also die of it, can wake into something unimaginable, having turned herself into some new seces Days assed, somehow There was a long red hair on my shawl th at was too bright to be mine tried to get on with my life did all the same things had done day by day for years n end, but couldn't remember why had ever done them or indeed what had rought @ 2 2 6
The Tle of the Kss
m e here to live lone in cve like wild niml I tried not to think bout ll tht I tried not to think I woke one night The moon ws ll lling the mouth o the cve. All t once knew I needed tht girl like me t needs slt. Wht could I do? Could bring mysel to ollow her down into the vil lge? Could I lower mysel so r to let the little children throw snd t me? Would she be gone wy by the time cme down? Would they tell me where she hd gone? Would be ble to nd her? And i I did I swore to mysel swore on the perect disc o the moon then I would not let pride stop up my mouth I would sk her to come live in my cve nd lern ll knew nd tech me ll I didnt I would give her my hert in bg nd let her do with it wht she plesed I would sy the word love And wht hppened next you sk? Never you mind There re some tles 227 �
