Attract Her Harder with the NLP Contrast Technique Technique www.girlschase.com /content/a /content/attract-her-harde ttract-her-harder-nlp-contrast-tech r-nlp-contrast-technique nique
When you contrast yourself with unattractive men, you attract her more. The key lies in how you highlight their traits versus yours. Hello everyone. I hope you are doing great. Today I will share another NLP NLP-based -based technique that you can use to trigger attraction and to make women perceive you as the right guy – for her. What if you could contrast yourself against all the boring girls a guy meets, and be that much more delicious for her? Wouldn’t that do awesome things for your ability to attract her (and your success rates from those attractions)? Many men get kind of scared when they see NLP-based material like what I’ll give you today, but I promise you that this technique is actually pretty simple. In addition, this technique that I am about to share is rather risk-free. There’s very little chance it backfires on you. Worst-case scenario, it won’t work as well as you expect. But I will tell you, the results for me from this technique have consistently been amazing. This is a technique I use a lot when I go out to meet women, and it helps speed up the process. I will first get straight to what the technique is, then I will explain the mechanism and discuss briefly when one can use it. I will later share some examples in order to make sure you get an idea of how this works.
Attract Her with Contrast White becomes whiter when placed next to something black. Hot becomes hotter after exposure to cold. Exciting people become so much more exciting after spending time with boring people.
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The idea here is to create that contrast when talking to women: contrast yourself in a positive way from the usual boring guys. If you read my post on fractionation, then you might guess this technique uses similar concepts. Contrasting is, in fact, a fractionation-based technique. So if you consider that previous post an overview on what fractionation is, then you can consider this post more of a specific use of fractionation, and if you’ve read my previous post, you’d know that fractionation can be used in so many ways. This is just one of them. The idea here is that: 1.
Most men are boring, not sexy, and clueless when it comes to women. Yes, there are some naturals out there, but very few men really know how women work, and very few men know how to sweep them off their feet. According to most women I have spoken to, men are clueless and not sexy – this is why women tend to always go for the same men.
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You, on the other hand, are actually a guy who gets how to attract her. You know how a woman works, you know what they like and what they find unsexy. You also know how they think and how they feel in regards to different types of male behavior. For example, you know that grinding on women on the dance floor like a creepy desperate man is not sexy. You know women like men who can appreciate them for their true sexuality – and are not scared of it. You know women like non-judgmental men. You know women love confident men... the list goes on.
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You are able to communicate all the above and contrast it to clueless and unattractive (most) men. This is what this technique is about. Not only will you be able to display a lot of attractive traits, such as female understanding and social awareness, and maybe even social proof (guys who know a lot about women and how they work are usually perceived as guys who bang a l ot), but you will also convey all of these in a much more powerful way, because you will contrast it to the typical sexually unattractive male behavior. Remember, hot water feels hotter after a cold shower.
If you are new and do not know anything about what women consider a turnoff, and if you don’t know what they find hot, don’t worry, because this site contains tons of invaluable articles about this (e.g., “ Turn Offs for Women: What NOT to Do” and “7 Dating Mistakes that Doom Men’s Love Lives ” in the ‘what turns her off’ department, and “How to Attract Women: The Guide ” and “How Many Attraction Factors are There? Infinite ” when it comes to ‘how to attract her’).
Contrasting: The Model I will now give you the step-by-step model of this technique and start sharing some examples. The examples shared will exhibit different levels of difficulty. However, you do not need to be super fancy or advanced to make it work. You can start small and still see the great effects of this technique. So here is how this technique works (step by step): 1. During an interaction with a girl, start mentioning the usual mistakes average men make with women, and do not hesitate to exaggerate them. 2. Next, contrast this by mentioning how attractive men would do things. Or you might mention what the average man does wrong, and what he could have done instead. You might even want to put emphasis on why these men fail and what works instead – how you would do things differently. Since you made fun of the average guy , you have pretty much disqualified yourself from being one of them, and since you discuss and put more emphasis on what is actually attractive, women will associate your words to you. In other words, they will perceive you as that attractive guy, and that perception is enhanced by that fact that you ust contrasted it to clueless men.
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Without them to contrast with, sexy just wouldn’t be as fresh a breeze as it is. Women will start feeling they have finally found a guy who gets it. By displaying so much female understanding and social awareness, you score some points on attractiveness. Here is an example:
Alek: I was at this club a few days ago... and I had this silly experience.... Her: What experience did you have? Alek: I saw all these women dressed up and all beautiful, dancing... making sexy moves and getting all the attention they so much needed... Her: And? Alek: And there was this circle of men surrounding these women... like planets orbiting the sun, it looked so silly. They were staring and almost salivating at all these girls. Her: Haha. Alek: And eventually one of the guys would man up and make a move... but he’d go in from behind and start grinding on the girl (feel free to make a satiric example), touching her hips and ass... and guess what happened? Her: The girl rejected the guy. Alek: Yes.
Now, what am I doing? I am pointing out the main mistake men make on the dance floor. As I mention it in a
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satiric way, not only does she know that I am aware that the behavior is not attractive (social awareness and female understanding), but I am also communicating that I am not one of those guys. Next thing I do is contrast it with “attractive behavior,” which she will then associate with me.
Alek: Now, do not get me wrong... there is absolutely nothing wrong with being sexual.... But I believe there are right ways and wrong ways to do so. Her: Absolutely. Alek: I believe it is key that a man takes things step by step... and starts slowly... maybe just start by taking her hand (take her hand), and maybe spin her (spin her)... and then pull her in (pull her in)... then pull her away (pull her away), and maybe touch her upper back (touch her upper back) before touching her hips (touch her hips)... isn’t it better that way? Her: Yeah! Alek: And I believe the good thing here is that a man, by doing things step by step, he can see whether or not it is fit to do things... and the last thing you want is be hit on sexually by a man you don’t find attractive! Her: No, I hate that! Alek: However, when he is attractive, it is cool? Her: Yes. Alek: I believe women will all become wild ... if... and there is a big if... they find the right guy... and they are in the right mood in the right scenario.... Her: Haha, so true! Alek: Of course, maybe also the right alcohol.... Her: Hahah....
I ended the whole thing with some humor... just because why not . But you can clearly see the contrasting effect here. It is much easier to attract her when you paint yourself as implicitly better than all these other unattractive men, due to that contrast. Another thing to mention is the use of what one might call “meta game.” By “meta game” I am referring to discussions regarding seduction as a means to seduce women. For instance, discussing social dynamics, how attraction works, what is attractive, how one can pick up a chick... as a tool to seduce women. But there is a caveat here, namely that meta game is dependent on you having a rather genuine style of seduction to make it work, else she might get a noxious feeling – and we do not want that, do we?
Making it Even More Powerful Here are a few things one can do to make this even more powerful: Put way more emphasis on the part where you discuss the attractive traits. You want her to be more focused on those and increase the odds of her associating those traits with you. Discuss the unattractive traits and behaviors of typical men before talking about the attractive ones. You
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want to end this technique with her thinking about the attractive traits, also increasing your odds of her putting you in the attractive pool. Fractionation – even more fractionation please. You can do this by, for example, discussing in a playful manner all the unattractive things, and then... change your tone... into a much slower... deeper one... with more amazing... details... and rich... language... in order to make... the whole thing... more exciting... passionate... and intriguing. By fractionating the delivery and the vibe itself, you create even more contrast. You can, of course, add a lot of commands and other related NLP tools when using this technique (this is optional). When discussing the unattractive things, make sure you do so in a funny “satiric” way. Feel free to exaggerate. You don’t want it to be too serious that she starts to really dwell on these things. Then you may un-attract her. When discussing the attractive things, make sure you touch her and use more eye contact, self-relating during the delivery in order to make her anchor those attractive things even more with you. Here is another example of this process:
Alek: Have you ever met a guy who was hot, and looking at him really intrigued you? Her: Yes! Alek: Yet once you started displaying interest in him... he became more and more needy ... calling you 5 times a day and even showing up at your workplace? Her: Yes, haha, this happened to me once with this X guy. Alek: And once he got in touch with you, he either started asking what he did wrong... or even begged you to give him a chance! Her: Yes, hahahaha...
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Best way ever to get zero second chances with her. Here you can see I kind of showed social awareness by discussing what not to do, things guys often do that do not attract her. Most women will relate to what you say, which can help you build rapport. Now that you have just made fun of these guys, you are sub-communicating that you are not one of them. This is a good thing. Next, you contrast this with the juicy stuff – the stuff she actually likes...
Alek: On the other hand, have you ever met a man who is the total opposite of that guy – a man you just found to be... so intriguing ... a man who you could not really make sense of... but... in a good way? Her: Yes! Alek: A man who you knew, deep inside, was interested in you, yet kept making it unclear to you whether or not he was really into you... and the more you wondered about whether or not he is into you... the more you became interested in him... and the more you liked him...? Her: Oh yeah, so true.... Alek: But you will eventually know that he is interested in you... he will show you that he likes you, but not by begging, sending 100 messages, or stalking you.... However, once you are with him... you will feel like you are his world... and you will feel like a real woman....
Wow, there was a lot going on here. To you advanced guys: are you able to see all the other NLP related tools used here? This is optional, of course. The point I am trying to make is that this technique can be used as a way to add a lot of juice – commands, rich descriptions, trance words, and even weasel phrases. It is obvious there is some fractionation going on here as well... in terms of languaging, pace, and overall vibe. PS: If you are a beginner, just disregard the nerding. But the important aspect – and the one more related to this exact technique – was that I just described what a
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hot man is, according to women. I used vague language and put way more emphasis on the attractive traits than on the not so attractive traits. I made sure I contrasted with the unattractive in order to enhance the effect. Another example for you:
Alek: Do you know what I find so funny these days? Her: No, tell me? Alek: Most guys just want to fuck....
Now let us contrast it...
Alek: I don’t want just sex... I am not looking for just sex... Her: Really? (confused) Alek: No... I am looking for GOOD sex... the kind that takes your mind to a different space, the type that makes you forget the world around you, the type that makes you feel spontaneous, adventurous, and passionate.... Her: Me too.
You see, contrasting does not need to be lengthy or complicated. You can make it more advanced... sure, but only if you want to (and are able to). Let me now share another variation of this example:
Alek: People these days just want to have what I refer to as McDonald’s sex.... Her: McDonald’s sex? Alek: Yeah, it happens quickly. You know the process... he touches you, you touch him back, you kiss... he invites you home, you resist but leave with him anyway. Then, at his place, you have a drink... make out... then you have a smoke, make out again, he tries to go for the kill, you resist, and in the end you have sex with him anyway.... Her: Haha... yeah, I have had situations like this.... Alek: You know the process, you know the taste – tastes neither good nor bad, and you know what you get.... Her: True, and it is not that good after all. Alek: No, it isn’t.
Let us contrast it. In the next example I will use symbols to induce a state (use food as a symbol for sex) and add a lot of commands. I will then use rich languaging and a softer voice tone.
Alek: I prefer having a four-star meal... I want my sex to be more intriguing.... You know the food will be good, but you surely do not know what it will taste like... it is... interesting... making you
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feel... adventurous... and you are open-minded to try out new things, making you feel so liberated... and open. Her: Yeah.... Alek: And I have a friend who happens to view the female body... as a seven-course meal... because, after all, women can get up to four types of orgasms.... Her: Oh, really? Which ones? Alek: Well... (describe each type of orgasm)....
And now I can even transition into some serious sex talk. This is powerful stuff.
Contrasting: The Uses Let us now discuss how this technique can help you attract her more. This technique allows you to: Create a lot of rapport – by showing you get it and that you understand her (women in general) Allows you to convey that you are an attractive guy... this technique is a pretty simple and strong tool to directly convey that you are an attractive guy Makes you stand out from other men Allows you to induce states and add commands and other juicy stuff (more advanced) You can use this as a transition... either into sex talk or deep diving... or whatever juicy technique you enjoy using This is a great technique you can use in the early phases of the interaction to really hook her in and get the conversation going As you can see... this is an overall useful and powerful technique. Let me share one last example before summing up this article:
Alek: Most men out there are so judgmental... if a girl happens to sleep with four guys in two days... she is... Her: A slut! Alek: Yes... it is so unfair.
Let us use some contrasting....
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This is basically how you want to encourage her to act.
Alek: But I think sex is totally natural.... May I ask you, isn’t it natural for a woman to liberate herself and enjoy her sexuality freely? Her: Oh my god... yes! Alek: Do people have to be so stuck up? Why can’t we all just be free...? You see, I will never judge a girl for being sexual in any way, because this is where I believe femininity lies. And, being a man, I happen to like femininity; hence I like her as a sexual being....
And from there you can transition into a lot of juicy stuff.... But let us not get ahead of ourselves. I think it is time to summarize this article.
The NLP Contrast Technique In this article we have discussed the uses of contrasting. By contrasting we want to discuss the typical unattractive traits and behaviors most men display, then contrast them with a rich description of attractive stuff, to better attract her to us. When you contrast yourself against notso-sexy men like this, you: Display social awareness and female understanding (attractive) Communicate that you are an attractive guy who really gets it, so she will associate the attractive behaviors you just described with you Feel free to use any of the examples I shared – they do work. I have used them many times with great success.
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But try to make some of your own. It is a good exercise. After a while you will be contrasting automatically and unconsciously, and you will be able to experience the great effects of this technique. Happy hunting, Alek
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