Rewrite Your Script_ 3 Angles of Attack for Rewriting a Screenplay

02/01/2019

Rewrite Your Script: 3 Angles of Attack for Rewriting A Screenplay (hp://www.movieoutline.com)

(/support)

800. 800.47 475. 5.17 1797 97

0800 0800 048 048 862 8628 8

(/movie-outline-soware.html)

Pr Products

Purchase

Resources

Support

Resources (/screenwring-resources.html)

Compa ny ny

Arcles (/screenwring-arcles.html) (/screenwring-arcles.html)

New Release: Script Studio

Rewring (/arcles/rewring)

Rewrite Your Your Script: 3 Angles of Aack for Rewring A Screenplay (hps:

By William M. Akers (/arcles/william-m-akers) (/arcles/william-m-akers) Share (hp://www.addthis.com (hp://www.addthis.com/bookmark. /bookmark.php?v=250&username php?v=250&username=nuvotech) =nuvotech) | Gosto 64

“The first dra of everything is s hit.” -Ernest Hemingway (hp://www.scriptstudio.com)

Buy Script Studio Online

Hemingway, Hemingway, charming as ever, was correct. Everybody’s Everybody’s first dra is shit. Even his. Yours Yours too! You have to rewrite and rewrite and rewrite unl you nail it. Then you stop. The good news is, you can fix just about anything. It only takes elbow grease and me. “I'm not a very good writer, but I'm an excellen t rewriter.”

(/script-

-James A. Michener

wringnewsle

“Hear hear!”

subscrib

-William M. Akers Aer your idea, rewring is the single most important imp ortant thing. If you’ve got a good g ood idea, no maer how lousy your first dra is, you can fix i t. I’ve been there. And so has eve has every ry other professional writer. Beginners, oddly, expect the th e first thing that spews from their th eir printer will be gold. I choose the word “spews” c arefully. arefully. “Spew” “Spew” like “garbage” and a nd “vomit.” “vom it.”

(hps://store.scriptstudio.com/)

What the Pros Say...

Perhaps the problem is laser printers. Insidious demons. If you wrote your first first dra dra on yellow

I thoroughly

paper with a pencil, pe ncil, it’s guaranteed to look all s meared and awful, and and you will wi ll have have no

enjoy working

problem thinking, “Gosh, this is horrible. Perhaps Pe rhaps I should work on it a bit more.” But, if you

with Movie

print it on a nice nice laser laser printer, printer, it will look shiny and clean -- and done. Trust me, it isn’t.

Outline and find it easy to use, well designed, helpful

Wring is not an event, like Athena like Athena being being born fully-formed from the head of Zeus. It’s a process, like sculpture. You start. You start. You You mess with mess with it. You study it, you work on it, re-do it and

nd entertaining. If you're a

put it away. Then you look at it again and work some more.

ovice or a seasoned pro, this program can aid

“Take an object. Do something to it. Do something else to it. Do something else to it.”

reatly in your creave

-Jasper Johns

process.

When you roll up your sleeves to rewrite, consider (at least!) three things: Story. Dialogue. Scene Descripon.

Upgrade From Movie Outline

Story The hard one. The reeeeeally important one. Pretend Judge Judy is looking at your dra, being an obnoxious cric. If you don't have a good answer for why something is there, she hammers you flat. You must turn into your own Judge Judy. Judy. This is not easy. If you love it when you write it and you love it when you read it, you're probably in trouble. Put it away for a while and ask tough quesons when you drag it out for

(hp://support.scriptstudio.com/Upgrade)

30 Day Money Back Guarantee

the rewrite. Have you read it out loud? Repeatedly? Does the story communicate what you wanted it to? Do you start the story late enough? Have you eliminated most, if not all, backstory from the first act? Do you have the right main character?

Download Free Trial

Does the main character change? A lot. Can characters can be cut or combined? Is the hero in the crusher all the me? Do we care about the character and her problem? Is the bad guy the one who forces the hero to change? Have you wrien wonderful minor characters? Like the roommate in NOTTING HILL?

(hp://www.scriptstudio.com/Download)

Tag Cloud

Is “place” a character in your story? Is your story about one simple idea, and does each scene further that ONE idea? How many scenes can be combined? How can you add more conflict in every sc ene?

http://www.movieoutline.com/articles/rewrite-your-script-3-angles-of-attack-for-rewriting-a-screenplay.html

1/5

02/01/2019

Rewrite Your Script: 3 Angles of Attack for Rewriting A Screenplay Can you squeeze something more about the character from nearly every scene? Have you made us feel what every character is feeling, in every scene? What can you do to make each scene beer, more memorable, more interesng? Does the acon build in intensity as we go along? Does the ending have enough emoon and power? Are the stakes high and do they go higher? Will people who care about act breaks be able to find them? Is the script really good or do you just hope it is? Do other people read it and s ay, “Wow!”? Even seemingly insignificant changes will have a long-term, cumulave effect. A change you make on page 48 will affect page 49 and 50 and 51 -- every single page, all the way to 110.

(hps:

Imagine your story like a river flowing by. Every scene is downstream from the one before. If you make a change on page 48, it’s as if you pour a bucket of blue dye into the river -- as your story connues to move, it will color everything downstream. Story is what they pay you for. You can get fired, someone else can come in and rewrite all the dialogue, and you’ll sll get sole wring credit. Story and the structure are the big deal. But, hey, story’s not everything.

Dialogue You've got to write great dialogue. Actors want to say cool stuff. You're wring this movie so actors will aach themselves to it. There's nothing more excing than knowing somebody really talented loves your dialogue and wants to say it on the big s creen. But that takes a lot

(/script-

of me, work, effort – blood, tears, and sweat.

wringnewsle

If your dialogue isn’t great, don’t worry -- you can make it great!

subscrib

First thing to do with dialogue is get rid of it. Ruthlessly. Take a Weed Eater to it. Read it out loud and cut ANY repeon.

DAVE It’s a beautiful day to rob a bank. Yes, sir, what gorgeous weather. Yep, I’d say it’s bank robbing weather!

It’s amazing how oen writers make their hard-working characters say the same thing again and again. It’s also amazing how oen the good dialogue is already there, peeking out from under the crud. How about this --

DAVE It’s bank robbing weather!

Watch movies on DVD and transcribe in script format w hat the characters say. It’s AMAAAAZING how lile they say. The best actors want fewer lines. Noce how characters in screenplays -- that get sold -- do not talk like each other. You have to separate the characters’ voices. Character by character, check your dialogue to make sure --

1. All the way through, a character sounds the same Is the voice consistent and in keeping with where the character is from and his morality and economic stratum and how he was raised, and everything else having to do with the character? The speed at which he talks. The rhythm of his language. Choice of words. Does he use contracons a lot, seldom, never? Does he cuss a lot? Does he use big words, but doesn’t know what they mean? Is he from North Dakota and does it show in his dialogue? Was he in the military? Is he shy? How much can you teach us about each person, just by their personal use of language?

2. His dialogue doesn't sound like any other character’s. Do a dialogue pass for eac h character. Type Ctrl F or Apple F, for FIND, set it for “match case” and then, in uppercase leers, a CHARACTER’S NAME. Go through the script one character at


2/5

02/01/2019

Rewrite Your Script: 3 Angles of Attack for Rewriting A Screenplay a me checking only that character’s dialogue, making sure it always sounds like him and no one else. Even for Pizza Delivery Dude.

3. Make sure the characters don’t sound like you!

More niy thoughts on dialogue Write dialogue for someone you know so your character sounds like your friend. Write for actors whose voices you know well, but might never end up in the movie, especially if they're dead. Write for Bogart and Bacall. Who’ll know? Talk into a tape recorder unl you get a solid handle on the character’s voice. Try not to let your spouse’s parents witness this. Take acng class es. (hps:

Hide exposion like Jimmy Hoffa! Make sure you’ve used correct format for parenthecals. When an agent flips through your script, bad format shouts “Amateur!" Make up your own rules -- everyone in the lead character's family can speak with Brish syntax, even if they're all American. Write superb dialogue for minor characters. You’re always wring actor bait. Naturally, you’re interested in geng Mr. Mega Star to aach to play the male lead, but you also have to cast Pizza Delivery Dude. It’s crucial that you write interesng, specific Pizza Delivery Dude dialogue if you want a gied actor to play Pizza Delivery Dude. Especially if you’re asking him to do it for free! Remember, people interrupt each other and don’t speak in complete sentences. Know what language your character uses. If you're wring about Country music do

(/script-

you know what “girm” means? What about “blue steel” if your character is a

wring-

prostute? Do your dialogue homework.

newsle

Finally, do you keep a log of overheard dialogue? You should. All my students do. You train

subscrib

your ear to hear specific language, rhythm, plus, it ’s fun to eavesdrop. One guy turned in this beaut --

A forty-something CHRIS and his teenage nephew, BJ sit at a kitchen table during a small, black family gathering. The uncle is very heavy and very loud. BJ, thin and close-mouthed, speaks with a genuine love for his uncle.

BJ Uncle Chris, do you ever plan on getting married?

CHRIS I love women, but it’s only two things in this world I ain’t never seen. A spaceship and a bitch I need.

Scene Descripon You must be able to communicate your great story to someone else -- on paper. If they can’t get it off your page, your story is worthless. The words on the page must explain the movie in your head to the reader. It’s way more complex than you might think. “All they read is the dialogue.” -Overheard at the Farmers Market, Los Angeles Believe this at your peril. If the guy who said that were a working writer, he'd be in an office on the Universal lot instead of ponficang at the Farmers Market in the middle of the aernoon. Scene descripon maers. Readers who appreciate good wring will noce your scene descripon. By the end of the first page, they can't tell if you know what a reversal is, but they will sure know if you can’t write a decent sentence. Be clear. Don’t write, “Frank dresses in nice looking clothes.” because we might think he's geng dressed. Instead, write “Frank wears nice looking clothes,” so we know he’s a fashion plate. Make sure we understand the picture you’re beaming into our brain. Here is scene descripon, the final version --

He takes out his phone and dials. It RINGS without picking up. He calls a different number.


3/5

02/01/2019

Rewrite Your Script: 3 Angles of Attack for Rewriting A Screenplay Obvious that the guy makes two phone calls, one aer the other, to different people. Now, the original. Remember: Confusion = Tearing of Hair and Gnashing of Teeth.

He takes out his phone and dials. It RINGS without picking up. He calls again. We think he calls the same number twice. Because he doesn't, we're confused. This dialogue seems fine unl you read it a couple of mes --

SOOTHSAYER He has protection from a spirit.

(hps:

Does this mean the spirit protects him from those trying to kill him, or does it mean he has an amulet that gives him protecon from a spirit trying to do him harm? One sentence. Totally opposite possible meanings.

DEPUTY SHERIFF I heard her come in the Chrysler.

(/scriptWhich meaning did that writer intend?

wringnewsle

Your scene descripon must convey the meaning you want with as few words as possible.

subscrib

Trimming + Rearranging = Rewring.

In his rearview mirror, Jimmy sees a cop car, lights blazing, right behind him. Jimmy sees a cop car, lights blazing, in his rearview. We sll get it. It's quicker. We see a beer image that takes less me to read. Here’s a first dra sentence.

The lawn has beer bottles and a rolled up "Slip n' Slide" scattered about. This becomes --

Beer bottles and a rolled up "Slip n' Slide" scattered about the lawn. A stronger sentence. Ends on a beer word, and, w hoa!, it's shorter!! The third dra improves it even more --

Scattered about the lawn -- beer bottles and a rolled up "Slip n' Slide." Cut for the speed of the read as well as the reader ’s understanding of what you’re trying to get across. Don’t hide the meaning of your image by piling on tons of words. You’re no longer an English major, geng paid by the pound. Think minimalism. Remember, unless the reader is your boyfriend, he doesn’t really want to read your material in the first place, so make it as painless as possible. Finally, visit my website www.yourscreenplaysucks.com (hp://www.yourscreenplaysucks.com) and check out the “7 Deadly Sins of Screenwring” checklist. Do what it says and your w ring will automacally get beer! Sadly, you can’t stay in the comfortable world of rewring forever -- you do have to finally finish. Listen to John Singer Sargent -“It takes two people to paint a portrait. One to paint it, and one to tell him when to stop.” Or Max Wong, Hollywood producer -“How do you know when your script is ready? When the only choice is do another dra or blow your brains out.” At some point, it’s done. And aer that point, I say, “Good luck!”


4/5

02/01/2019

Rewrite Your Script: 3 Angles of Attack for Rewriting A Screenplay About William M. Akers A Lifeme Member of the WGA, William M. Akers has had three feature films produced from his screenplays. He has wrien scripts and series television for studios, independent producers, and television networks. He is Chair of the Program in Moon Pictures at Belmont University. Akers does story consulng and

Products Services around the world. His bestselling book, gives wring & workshops Online Store (hps://store.scriptstudio.com/) Your Screenplay Sucks!, has a five star rang at Amazon.com. Script Studio (hp://www.scriptstudio.com) Movie Outline 3 (/movie-outline-soware.html) Script It! (/script-it-soware.html) Hollywood Deconstructed Ebook (/hollywood-deconstructed-ebook.html) Hollywood Script Express (hp://www.hollywoodscriptexpress.com)

(hps:

Copyright Registraon (/copyright-screenplay.html) Script Copying & Shipping (/script-copying-and-shipping.html)

Downloads & Demos Download Free Trial (/free-trial-download) Movie Outline Video Tour (/Tour/Tour.html) Compare ScreenwringSoware (/compare-screenwring-soware.html) Press Kit & Graphics (/press-kit.html) Soware Updates (/soware-updates.aspx) Upgrade Soware (/soware-upgrade.aspx) Soware Requirements (/system-requirements.html)

(/scriptwringnewsle subscrib

Screenwring Resources Screenwring Arcles (/screenwring-arcles.html) Screenwring Tips (/arcles/screenwring-ps) Entertainment Law (/arcles/entertainment-law) Screenwring Books (/screenwring-books.html) Script Wring Glossary (/arcles/a-glossary-of-screenwring-terms-and-filmmaking-definions.html) Screenplay Format (/arcles/screenplay-format-a-guide-to-industry-standard-script-formang.html) Screenplay Soware (/arcles/how-screenwring-soware-can-help-you-write-beer-scripts.html)

Company & Support About Us (/about-us.html) Contact Us (/support) Knowledge Base (/knowledge-base.aspx) Register Soware (/register) Press & News (hp://www.movieoutline.com/screenwring-blog/index.php/category/press-releases/) Product Reviews (/movie-outline-reviews.html) Authorized Resellers (/movie-outline-resellers.html)

© 2019 Nuvotech Limited (hp://www.nuvotech.co.uk) | Company Policies (/policies.html) Share (hp://www.addthis.com/bookmark.php?v=250&username=nuvotech) Home (hp://www.movieoutline.com) | Store (hps://store.scriptstudio.com) | Sitemap (/sitemap.html) | XML Sitemap (/sitemap.xml) | RSS Feed (hp://www.movieoutline.com/screenwring-blog/index.php/feed/) | Contact (/support)


5/5

Rewrite Your Script_ 3 Angles of Attack for Rewriting a Screenplay

Recommend Documents