The Revolutionary Process Called “The Work”
“No one can give you freedom but you. Thi s l itt le boo k w ill sho w y ou how. ” —Byron Katie
This booklet presents the essence of The Work of Byron Katie. Each year, thousands of these booklets are sent by request, at no charge, to non-profit organizations around the world, helping people discover the life-changing power of inquiry.
The Wor The ork k of Byron Katie A n I n t r o d u c t i o n
If you would like to explore this process further, we suggest you ask for Loving What Is wherever books are sold. The book version will take you deeper into The Work, and includes many examples of Katie facilitating people on issues such as fear, health, relationships, money, the body, and more. Loving What Is is also available as an audiobook, which offers you the invaluable experience of hearing Katie do The Work in live workshop recordings. The book and book and audiobook are available on our website as well, well , thework.com, or they can be ordered by calling 805.444.5799.
© 2015 Byron Katie International, Inc. All rights reserved.
depression was not the worl d around her, but what she believed about the world around her. In a ash of insight, she saw that our attempt to nd happiness was backward—instead of hopelessly trying to change the world to match our thoughts about how it “should” be, we can question these thoughts and, by meet ing reality as it is, experience unimagina ble freedom and joy. As a
Introduction
result, a bedridden, suicidal woman became lle d with love for everything life brings.
The Work of Byron Katie is a way to identify and question the thoughts that cause all the suering in the
Katie developed a simple yet powerful method of
world. It is a way to nd peace with yourself and with the
inquiry, called The Work, that showed people how
world. Anyone with an open mind c an do this Work.
to free themselves. Her insight into the mind is consistent with leading-edge research in cognitive
Byron Kathleen Reid became severely depressed
neuroscience, and The Work has been compared to
while in her thirties. Over a ten-year period her
the Socratic dialogue, Buddhist teachings, and twelve-
depression deepened, and for the last two years
step programs. But Katie developed her method
Katie (as she is called) was seldom able to leave her
without any know ledge of religion or psychology.
bedroom. Then one morning, from the depths of
The Work is based purely on one woman’s direct
despair, she experienced a life-changing realization.
experience of how suering is created and ended. It is astonishingly simple, accessible to people of all ages
Katie saw that when she believed her thoughts
and backgrounds, and requires nothing more than a
she suered, and that when she didn’t believe her
pen and paper and a willingness to open the mind.
thoughts she didn’t suer. What had been causin g her
Katie saw right away that giving people her insights
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The Work of Byron Katie
What Is Is
“Can you really know tha t that’s true?” Which is more empowering?—“ I wish I hadn’t lost my job” or “I lost
The only time we suer is when w e believe a thought
my job; what intelligent solutions can I nd right now?”
that argues with what is. When the mind is perfectly clear, what is is what we want. If you want reality to
The Work reveals that what you think shouldn’t have
be dierent than it is, you might as well tr y to teach a
happened should have happened. It should have
cat to bark. You can try and try, and in the en d the cat
happened because it did happen, and no thinking
will look up at you and say, “Meow.” Wanting reality
in the world can change it. This doesn’t mean that
to be dierent than it is is hopeless.
you condone it or approve of it. It just means that you can see things without resistance and without
And yet, if you pay attention, you’ll notice that you
the confusion of your inner struggle. No one wants
believe thoughts lik e this dozens of times a day.
their children to get sick, no one wants to be in a car
“People should be kinder.” “Children should be
accident; but when these things happen, how can it be
well-behaved.” “My husband (or wife) should agree
helpful to mentally argue with them? We know better
with me.” “I should be thinner (or prettier or more
than to do that, yet we do it, because we don’t know
successful).” These thoughts are ways of wanting
how to stop.
reality to be dierent than it is. If you thi nk that this sounds depressing, you’re right. All the stress that we
I am a lover of what is, not because I’m a sp iritual
feel is caused by arguing with what is.
person, but because i t hurts when I argue with reali ty. We can know that reality is good just as it is, becaus e
People new to The Work often say to me, “But it would
when we argue with it, we experience tension and
be disempowering to stop my argumen t with reality. If
frustration. We don’t feel natural or balanced. When
I simply accept reality, I’ll become passive. I may even
we stop opposing reality, action becomes simple, ui d,
lose the desire to act.” I answer them with a question:
kind, and fearless.
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The Work of Byron Katie
Meeting Your Thoughts with Understanding
I don’t let go of my thoughts—I meet them wit h understanding. Then they let go of me. Thoughts are like the breeze or the leaves on the trees
A thought is harmless unless we believe it. It is not
or the raindrops falling. They appear like that, and
our thoughts, but the attachment to our thoughts,
through inquiry we can make friends with them. Would
that causes suering. Attaching to a thought means
you argue with a raindrop? Raindrops aren’t personal,
believing that it’s true, without inquiring. A belief is a
and neither are thoughts. Once a painful concept is met
thought that we’ve been attaching to, often for years.
with understanding, the next time it appears you may nd it interesting. What used to be the nightmare is
Most people think that they are what their thoughts
now just interesting. The next time it appears, you may
tell them they are. One day I noticed that I wasn’t
nd it funny. The next time, you may not even n otice it.
breathing—I was being breathed. Then I also noticed,
This is the power of loving wha t is.
to my amazement, that I wasn’t thinking—that I was actually being thought and that thinkin g isn’t personal. Do you wake up in the morning and say to yourself, “I think I won’t think today”? It’s too late: You’re already thinking! Thoughts just appear. They come out of nothing and go back to nothing, like clouds moving across the empty sky. They come to pass , not to stay. There is no harm in them until we attach to them as if they were true. No one has ever been able to control his thinking, although people may tell the story of how they have. An Introduction
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How to Fill In a Worksheet 1. In this situation, who angers, confuses, or disappoints you, and why?
I invite you to contemplate for a moment a situation
angry with Paul because he do�sn’t li�ten �o �e about his health.
where you were angry, hurt, sad, or disappointed in
I am
someone. Please be as judgmental, childish, and petty as you were in that situation. Don’t try to be wiser or more spiritual or kinder than you were. This is a
2. In this situation, how do you want them to change? What do you want them to do?
time to tantrum, to look within yourself, to look back at that specic situation and be totally honest and
Paul to see tha� he is wrong. I want him to ��op lying to �e. I want him to see tha� he is kil�ing himse�f. I want
uncensored about why you were hurt and how you felt when the situation was occurring. Allow your feelings to express themselves as they arise, without any fear
3. In this situation, what advice would you oer to them?
of consequences or any threat of punishment.
Paul should take � deep breath. He should calm down. He should see tha� his behavior �rightens �e. He should know tha� being right is not w�rth anothe� heart ��tack.
On the next page, you’ll nd an exa mple of a completed Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet. I have written about my second husband, Paul, in this example (included here with his permission); these are the kinds of thoughts that I used to believe a bout
4. In order for you to be happy in this situation, what do you need them to think, say, feel, or do?
him before inquiry found me. As you read, you’re
I need Paul to hear �e wh�n I talk to him. I need him to take care of himse�f. I need him to admit �ha� I am right.
invited to replace Paul’s name with the appropriate name in your life.
5. What do you think of them in this situation? Make a list.
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Inquiry: The Four Questions and the Turnarounds
1. Is it true? As you consider the situation again, ask yourself, “Is it true that Paul doesn’t listen to me about his health?” Be still. If you really want to know the truth, the honest yes or no from within will rise to meet
1. Is it true? (Yes or no. If no, move to question 3.)
the question as you recall that same situation in your mind’s eye. Let the mind ask the question , and wait
2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true? (Yes or n o.)
for the answer that surfaces. (The answer to quest ions one and two is just one syllabl e long; it is either yes or
3. How do you react, what happens, when you
no. And notice if you experience any defense as you
believe that thought?
answer. If your answer includes “becau se …” or “but …”, this is not the one-syllable answer you are looking
4. Who would you be without the thought?
for, and you are no lon ger doing Th e Work. You are looking for freedom outside you. I am invit ing you into a
Turn the though t around. Then nd at least three
new paradigm—alive, right here, right now.)
specic, genuine examples of how the turnaround is 2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true? Consider
true for you in this situation.
these questions: “In that situation, can I absolutely know Now, using the four questions, let’s investigate
that it’s true that Paul isn’t listening to me about his health?
statement 1 on the Worksheet: Paul doesn’t listen
Can I ever really know when someone is listening or not?
to me about his health. As
you read along, think of
Am I sometimes listening even when I appear not to be?”
someone you haven’t totally forgiven yet, someon e 3. How do you react, what happens, when you
who just wouldn’t listen to you.
believe that thought? How do you react emotionally when you believe that Paul doesn’t listen to you about An Introduction
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The Work of Byron Katie
perspective, in that situation. Are you listening to Paul when you’re thinking about him not listening to you? A third turnarou nd is “Paul does listen to me about his health.” For example, he put out the cigarette he was
Judge your neighbor, write it down. Ask four questions, turn it around. - bk
smoking. He might light another one in ve minutes, but in that situation, even as he was telling me that he didn’t care about his health, he was apparently listening to me. For this and for each turnaround you discover, always nd at least three specic, genuine examples of how the turnaround is true for you in this situation. After si tting wi th the tur naroun ds, yo u would c ontinu e a typical inquiry with the next statement written on the Worksheet—in this case, I want Paul to see that he is wrong—and then with every other statement on the
Worksheet.
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Your Turn: The Inquiry
revelations about yourself and your world, revelations that will transform your whole life, forever.
One by on e, put each statement on the Ju dge-YourNeighbor Worksheet up against the four questions.
Look at statement 1 on your Worksheet. Now ask
Then turn around the statement you’re working on
yourself the following questions:
and nd at least three specic, genuine examples for each turnaround. (Refer back to the example in
1. Is it true?
the section en titled “How to Fill In a Worksheet.” You
Reality, for me, is what is true. The truth is whatever is in
can also nd help at thework.com, or with The Work
front of you, whatever is really happening. Whether you
App, wh ich in clude s a tutor ial wi th Byron Ka tie.)
like it or not, it’s raining now. “It shouldn’t be raining”
Throughout this process, explore being open to
is just a thought. In reality, there is no such thing as
possibilities beyond what you think you know. There’s
a “should” or a “shouldn’t.” These are only thoughts
nothing more exciting than discovering the don’t-
that we impose onto reality. Without the “shoul d” and
know mind.
“shouldn’t,” we can see reality as it is, and this leaves us free to act eciently, clearly, and sanely.
This Work is meditation. It’s like diving into yourself. Contemplate the questions, drop down into the depths
When asking the rst question, take your time. The
of yourself, listen, and wait. The answer will nd your
answer is either yes or no. (If no, move to question 3.) The
question. The mind will join the heart, no matter how
Work is about discovering what is true from the deepest
closed down or hopeless you think you are: the gentler
part of yourself. You are listening for your answer now,
polarity of mind (which I call the heart) will meet the
not other people’s, and not anything you have been
polarity that is confused because it hasn’t yet been
taught. This can be very unsettling at rst, because you’re
enlightened to itself. When the mind asks sincerely,
entering the unknown. As you continue to dive more
the heart will respond. You may begin to experience
deeply, allow the experience to h ave you completely.
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3. How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
fearful eyes, a sleepwalker, someone in a seemingly endless nightmare. The remedy was simply to inquire.
With this question, we begin to notice internal cause and eect. You can see that when you believe the
I love question 3. Once you answer it for yourself, once
thought, there is an uneasy feeling, a disturbance that
you see the cause and eect of a thought, all suering
can range from mild discomfort to fear or pan ic.
begins to unravel.
After the four questions found me, I would notice
4. Who would you be without the thought?
thoughts like “People should be more loving,” and I
This is a very powerful question. Who or what would
would see that thoughts like these caused a feeling of
you be without the thought?
uneasiness in me. I noticed that prior to the thought,
the thought? Picture yourself standing in the presence
there was peace. My mind was quiet, alert, and serene.
of the person you have written about when the y’re
This is who I am without my story. Then, in the stilln ess
doing what you think they shouldn’t be doing. Now,
of awareness, I began to notice the feelings that came
just for a minute or two, close your eyes and imagine
from believing or attaching to the thought. And in the
who you would be if you didn’t even have the ability to
stillness I could see that if I were to believe the thought,
think this thought. How would your life be dierent in
the result would be a feeling of unease and sadness.
the same situation without the thou ght? Keep your eyes
When I asked, “How do I react when I belie ve the
closed and watch th em without your story. What do you
thought that people should be more loving?” I saw
see? How do you feel about them without the story?
that not only did I have an uncomfortable feeling (this
Which do you prefer—with or without your story? Which
was obvious), but I also reacted with mental images
feels kinder? Which feels more peaceful?
How would you be without
to prove that the thought was tr ue. I ew o into an imagined worl d that didn’t exist . I reacted by living in a
For many people, life without their story is literally
stressed-out body and mind, seeing everything through
unimaginable. They have no reference for it. So “I
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The Turnaround for
is “out there”—as long as you think th at anyone or anything else is responsible for your suering—the situation is hopeless. It mea ns that you are forever in
Statement 6
the role of the victim, that you’re suer ing in paradise. So bring the truth home to yours elf and begin to set
The turnaround for statement 6 on the Judge-Your-
yourself free. It’s no longer necessary to wait for
Neighbor Worksheet is a little dierent from the others.
people or situations to change in order to experience
“I don’t ever want to…” turns around to “I am willing
peace and har mony. The Work is the direct way to
to…” and “I look forward to…” For example, “I don’t
orchestrate your own happiness.
ever want Paul to lie to me again” turns around to “I am willing to have Paul lie to me again” and “I look forward to having Paul lie to me again.” This turnaround is about embracing all of life, just as it is. Saying—and meaning—“I am willing to…” creates open-mindedn ess, creativity, and exibility. Any res ista nce you m ay hav e to the wor ld is soft ened , and that allows you to open up to the situ ation in your life rather than hopelessly applying willpower to eradicate it or keep it away. Saying and meanin g “I look forward to…” actively opens you to life as it unfolds. Some of us have learned to accept what is, and I am here to invite you to go further, to actually love what is. This is our natur al state. Total freedom without fear is our birthright.
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with my abusive thoughts and actions? If not, I’m
without conict. If you nd anything lacking, ever,
continuing in myself the very thing I want to end in
write down your thoughts and inquire. I nd that
the world. I start with ending my own suering, my
life never falls short and doesn’t require a future.
own war. This is a life’s work.
Everything I need is always supplied, and I don’t have to do anything for it. There is nothing more
Q So what you’re saying is that I should just accept
exciting than loving what is.
reality as it is and not argue with it. Is that right? Q What if I don’t have a problem with people? Can I A It’s not up to me to say what anyone should or
write about things, like my body?
shouldn’t do. I simply ask, “What is the eect of arguing with reality? How does it feel?” The Work
A Yes. Do The Work on any subject that is stressful. As
explores the cause and eect of attaching to
you become familiar with the four questions and the
painful thoughts, and in that investigation we nd
turnarounds, you may choose subjects such as the
our freedom. To simply say that we shouldn’t argue
body, disease, career, or even God. Then experiment
with reality just adds another story, another spiritual
with using the term “my thinking” in place of the
concept. It hasn’t ever worked.
subject when you do the turnarounds.
Q Loving what is sounds like never wanting anything.
Example: “My body should be strong, exible, and
Isn’t it more interesting to want things?
healthy” becomes “My thinking should be strong, exible, and health y.”
A My experience is that I do want something all the
time: what I want is what is. It’s not only interesting,
Isn’t that what you really want—a balanced, healthy
it’s ecstatic! When I want what I have, thought
mind? Has a sick body ever been a problem, or
and action aren’t separate; they move as one,
is it your thinking about the body that causes the
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You move totally away from reality when you believe that there is a legitimate reason to suer.
Katieisms When you argue with reality, you lose—but only 100% of the time.
Reality is always kinder than the story we are believing about it. I’m very clear that the whole world loves me. I just don’t expect them to realize it yet.
Personalities don’t love—they want something. If I had a prayer, it would be this: “God spare me from the desire for love, approval, or appreciation. Amen.”
There are no physical problems—only mental ones. Reality is God, because it rules.
Don’t pretend yourself beyond your own evolution.
When I am perfectly clear, what is is what I want.
An unquestioned mind is the only suering.
Arguing with reality is like trying to teach a cat to bark—hopeless.
You either believe what you think or you question it. There’s no other choice. No one can hurt me—that’s my job.
How do I know that I don’t need what I want? I don’t have it.
The worst thing that has ever happened is an unquestioned thought.
Forgiveness is realizing that what you thought happened didn’t.
Sanity doesn’t suer, ever.
Everything happens for me, not
If I think you’re my problem, I’m insane.
Gratitude is what we are without a story.
to me.
I don’t let go of my concepts—I question them. Then they let go of me.
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For School Graduates: The Institute for The Work
The Work on the Internet Katie and The Work are always accessible at thework.com. When you visit the website, you’ll be able
After attending the School for The Work,
to do any of the following: read detailed instructions
you are invited to join the more than
about The Work; watch video clips of Katie facilitating
one thousand members enrolled in the
people on a wide variety of issues; view Katie’s calendar
Institute for The Work of Byron Katie.
of events; register for an upcoming nine-day School for
The Institute oers School graduates
The Work, a ve-day No-Body Intensive, a weekend
a way to stay immersed in Th e Work and oers the
program, or Turnaround House; nd out how to call
only ocial certication program for The Work.
the free Do The Work Helpline; learn about the Institute
Whether or not you choose to enroll in the Certication
for The Work and its Certied Facilitators; download
Program, you’ll have access to The Work community
Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheets; listen to archived
forums. The forums are an exciting interactive hub
radio interviews; download apps for your iPhone, iPad,
where members from around the world connect to
or Android; subscribe to the free newsletter; or shop in
discuss relevant issues, and where you can view and
the online store. We also invite you to Katie’s Facebook,
discuss “Topics with Byron Katie.” You’ll also have the
Twitter, Google+, and Pinterest pages. For video, visit
opportunity to do The Work on a regular basis in our
TheWorkofBK YouTube channel, an d for live streaming
Daily Practice program. For more information, visit
events, visit livewithbyronkatie.com.
instituteforthework.com .
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“ Byron Katie’s Work is a great blessing for our planet. The Work acts like a razor-sharp sword that cuts through illusion and enables you to know for yourself the timeless essence of your being. ”
Contributions to The Work Foundation are gratefully accepted. Through your gifts, others will have the opportunity to learn this transformational practice. You can make a contribution by mail to The Work Foundation, P.O. Box 638, Ojai, CA 93024, USA; on our website, theworkfoundationinc.org; or by calling Byron Katie International at 805.444.5 799. The Work Foundation, Inc. is a tax-exempt, 501(c)(3) charitable organization. Your donation is tax deductible to the extent allowed by law.
15 Sep. 2015
—Eckhart Tolle, author of
The Power of Now
THE WORK OF BYRON KATIE P.O. Box 1206, Ojai, CA 93024, USA A P DF ver sio n of thi s b ook let can be dow nlo ade d on thework.com. This booklet includes excerpts from Loving What Is, which is available wherever books are sold, and through thework.com .
