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In highereducationit is necessaryto be able to structureand organiseessaysin an appropriateway, accordingto academicconventions.This moduleprovidesan introduction to academicessaywriting.lt guidesyou throughthe processof structuringan essayso that you are preparedfor the kind of writingyou will haveto do in a typicalBritishacademic institution.You will havethe opportunityto developyour ideasand to producedetailedessay module), outlineson topics such as trafficcongestion(coveredin the Problem-Solving Englishas a global languageand urbanovercrowding. Unit 1 looksat some basic principlesof writingacademicessays.You will analyseessay questionsand practisestrategiesfor organisingyour ideasand gatheringinformationon a topic. Unit 2 helpsyou get startedby showingyou how to write a thesisstatementand begin an essaywith an interestingintroduction.Unit 3 dealswith the main part of the essayand how to plan and write effectiveparagraphs,while Unit 4 dealswith the conclusion.Unit 5 examinesthe languageof essays;you will identifythe featuresof academicstyle and practiseusingformal,objectivelanguage.Finally,Unit 6 looks at some basic principlesto help you in the futurewith academicwriting,includingredraftingand what lecturersexpect. A sampleessayis includedin this unit to demonstrateessaystructureand presentation. tsythe end of the module,you will be more able to interpretessayquestionsand understand what lecturersexpectfrom you. You will be able to tacklethe processof writingan essayin a more organisedand systematicway, movingfrom a clear plan and outlineto a wellorganisedand well-writtenessaywith an effectiveintroductionand conclusion.
I
SkillsMeF Gettingorganised Learnsome basic principlesof academicwriting:essaystructure;analysingessay questions;brainstormingideasand issues.
Getting started Understand how to plan your writing. Learn to create effective introductions and write thesis statements.
The body of the essay Practisearrangingyour argumentsin a logicalsequence.Learneffective paragraphing.Practisesupportingyour arguments.
Summariesand conclusions Learn how to close your argument and draw conclusions.
Academicstyle and register Practiseusingappropriatelanguage:formalvs. informalstyle and some importantaspectsof academicwritten language.
Guidelinesfor the future Remembersome importantpoints:lecturerexpectations;producinga detailed essayoutline.Studya modelessay.
3
Eellingorganised At the end of this unit you will: . understand more about the requirementsof writing an academic essay; o have learnt how to produce a clear outline.
Basic principlesof essaywriting There are severaldifferenttypes of academic essay.For example,you might have to write: .
a descriptiveessay
.
an argumentessay
.
an analyticalessay
.
an evaluativeessay
.
a personalexperienceessay
.
a reflectiveessay
Some essays may be a mixtureof differentapproachesand types, but you need to be clear what sort of essayyou are writing.
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What is it for? What makes a good introduction?
The essay structure:
What is a paragraph? How do you show wherea paragraphbeginsand ends? How do you decide the order of paragraphs?
The conclusion:
What is it for? What makesa good conclusion?
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Do the questionnairebelow. Mark your competence in each area on a scale of 1 to 5 (1 = poor, 5 = excellent).Compareyour answerswith anotherstudent.
skitl
Score
Writingcorrectand accurateEnglish Planningan outlineof an essay
Draftingand redraftingmy writing Editingand proofreading Organisinginformation
Organising my time Findingand usingsourcematerial Paraphrasingother people'swords N*te: You will be able to think about the basic principlesof academicwritingin more depth in Unit 6. However,it is useful at this stage to think about what you can do already.
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=l Analysingthe essayquestion
possiblesolutionsand evaluatetheir with trafficcongestion. Suggest Discussthe problemsassociated effectiveness. :i ,:
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a) What exactly is traffic congestion? b) Wherewould you find trafficcongestion? c) What are the main causesof trafficcongestion? d)
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Suggest possible solutions and evaluate their effectiveness
Brainstorminginvolvesfree association, or rapidlygeneratingideason a topic. Try thesetwo differentways of brainstorming. Free writing This is whereyou quicklywrite down everyidea you havethat could be relevantto the topic. You can write a list or draw a spidergram.The aim is to producelots of ideas,so the form is not imporlant.You do not need to worry about correctspellingor grammar- it is the ideasthat are important. Group brainstorming This is whereall the membersof a group contributetheir own ideason the topic, 'bouncing'their ideasoff each other.
Transporting goodsby road.
a) Start individually. Thinkabout the topic Banninglorriesfrom townsand cities.Accept any ideas
that come into your head. b) Work in groups.Appointa chairpersonto write down ideas.Then brainstormthe toprc.
- Task:EssayWriling
=l Organisingyour ideas Now that you have a set of ideas,they need putting together in an organisedway. One method is to use a mind map to try to representyour ideas in a visualform. This can be very usefulwhen you want to quickly see the relationshipbetweenyour main topic, main ideas and supporling ideas (see essay title, Iask2'2)' You write the main topic in the middleof the page and placethe main ideasaroundit, connectedwith lines or arrows.Similarly,you write the supportingideasaroundthe main ideas,connectedwith linesor arrows' 4. i
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Probtems a==,ocid+ed conge on r.pifh trafflc
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Using your mind maps, work in groups to discuss the possible content of your essay,the introduction and main points.
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Eellingslarled At the end of this unit you will: . be better equipped to start writing an essay; . understand how to write a thesis statement; . have ideas on how to make the introduction interesting for the reader.
Task I whatto inctude Once you have begun to organiseyour ideas in a logicalway, you need to decide: o
how to structureyour essay;
o
how (andwhere)to includethese ideas.
For example,you need to make decisionsabout the main sectionsof your essay. 1.1
You might want to include the following points in your essay on traffic congestion.Think about the importance of each item in the list. Label them I, U or Nl (important,useful, not important). Add any other items or topics you can think of. a) A definitionof trafficcongestion. b) An explanationof the causes of traffic congestion. c) Your views on traffic congestion. e) A list of solutionsto the problem. f)
Examplesof traffic problems in your hometown.
g) Argumentsin favourof or againstpossiblesolutions. h) i)
i) 1"2
Decide in which order the ideas should appear in the essay.Which ones willyou need to spend most time on? Compare your ideas with another student.
TaSlf A Informationgathering In academicwritingit is not enoughto use your own ideaswithoutany supportingevidence.lt is essential 'academicweight'.You shouldobtain to includerelevantinformationfrom academicsourcesto give them this informationby thoroughlyresearchingthe topic, usinga varietyof sources. It is importantto make clear notes of any informationyou find. You can then use this information,with references,to supporl your argument.(SeeTASK,Module 10: Research& Referencing.)Keep a record of all your sourceswhen you collect the information,as it is easierto do this at the time, ratherthan later.
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Tark:Erray Writing- Unit* - Eeltingstarled
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*iscuss possible sources with another student" Write what you think will be your four main ssurces *f infcrm=ti*n.
Sources of information
2.2
Number the fall*wing points in the order of difficulty for you. Findingappropriatereferences Paraphrasingin your own words Understandinghow much use to make of externalsources Referencingin an appropriateway
2.3
Discuss your answers as a class.
TaSk il Arousinginterest:the introduction The introductionacts as a window to the rest of your writing.A good introductionshould make your reader want to read your work. You can encourageinterestby using a variety of differenttechniques.For example, you can use one or more of the following: a) a surprisingor interestingfact b) a question c) a quotation d) a definition e) some important backgroundinformation
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Which of the above, a) - e), has the author used in the introduction to an essay entitled:
3.1
Theeducationsystemin your country? Accordingto a recentsurvey,a significantproportionof the populationin my countryhasserious literacvoroblems.
g.2
Look at the four essaytitles below.Think of a sentenceto use as an introductionto each one, using any of the above,a) - e). Try to interestthe readerso as to encouragehim/herto read the rest of the essay' a) Familystructurein Yourcountry b) Thecriminaljusticesystemin yourcountry c) lmportsand exportsto and fromyourcountry in Yourcountry d) Transportation
TaSk 4 writinga thesisstatement An introductionshould also contain informationon how you will developthe topic in the essaytitle' You write this in the thesis statement, a statementof your standpointor the view taken in the essay.lt should be conciseand convincing.Yourthesis is the controllingidea of your essaythat you will developin the main body. You normallyfollow the thesis statementwith a clear indicationof how you will structurethe main body of your essay in support of your thesis statement' 4.1
The controlling ideas can be stated in many different ways. ldentify the controlling ideas of the following thesis statements.
a) Thecriminaljusticesystemin my countryfunctionsin a varietyof ways.
b) Although the Big Bang Theory is widely accepted, it will probably never be proved, and it thereforeleavesa number of difficult and unansweredquestions.
c) The key to coping with the rise in sea levels is educationon its effects and the accurate forecastingof its hazards.
4.2
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How do you think the rest of the essay will be developed in each case? What areas will be covered? Continue each statement with a sentence outlining the structure of the essay' beginning:'This essaq Ditl ...'.
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4.3
Look back at the ideasyou brainstormedin Unit 1 on traffic congestion.What is your own view about possiblesolutionsto the problems?ldentifuyour main idea and write it as the controllingidea in a singlesentence.This will be your thesis statement.
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4.4
What will you focus on? How will you developyour thesis in the main body of your essay? Write a follow-on sentencebeginning:'This essaq trlitl...',
Tagk 5 An effectiveintroduction An introduction shouldgenerallymovefromthe generalto the specific.Thefollowingexampleis an introduction to an essayaboutthe problemsassociatedwith urbanovercrowding. 5.1
5.2
Arrangethe five sentencesin the correct order. a)
As a resultof this migration,modern-daycitiesfacea numberof seriousproblems relatedto overcrowding.
b)
Peoplewerethereforedrawntowardslivingin townsand citiesfor simpleeconomic reasons.
c)
Thepurposeof this essayis to identifysolutionsto theseproblemsof urban overcrowding and attemptto evaluatetheirfeasibility.
d)
The mostcriticalproblemsincludehomelessness, inadequate healthcare and education, unemployment, and knock-oneffectssuchas risingcrimeand drugabuse.
e)
Thetwentiethcenturysaw a majorincreasein the world'spopulationand,at the same time,the emergence of a societydrivenby the forcesof economicsand industry.
Discussthe followingthreequestionswith anotherstudent. a) Markthe generalstatements G. Howdo theyattemptto interestthe reader? b) Markthe thesisstatementwith a tick. Howdo you expectthe restof the essayto be organised? c) Whatarethe minimumnumberof paragraphs you wouldexpectin this essay?Whatcanyou predictabouttheircontent?
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=? Is it likely to interestthe reader?Why? Doesit startwith a generalstatementrelatedto the topic and graduallybecomemore specific? Is therea thesisstatementthat tells the readerwhat the essaywill be about?Can you easily identify it? Does the introductiongive an overviewof the essaystructure? Are ideasclearly linked betweensentencesor is it sometimesconfusing? Does it include a definition?Do you think a definition is necessaryor would be helpful?
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Food additivesshould be banned. Discuss.
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What are the main benefitsof investingmoney in space research?
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Euthanasiashould be made legal.Discuss.
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Outlinethe differenttypes of alternativeenergy sources.
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What would you do to improvethe lives of the elderly in your country?
Essaywriting: points to remember o Planningand organisation are keyskills. .
Keepa closeeye on your title: alwaysanswerthe question.
.
Wordprocessingis very useful.For example,you can changetext or movesectionsaboutvery easily.(SeeModule7: lntroductionto lT SkrT/s.)
.
Keepa note as you go alongof all referencesor sourcesthat you use.
.
is an essentialskill. Redrafting
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Thebody of lhe essay At the end of this unit you will: o have a clear idea of how to structure the main part of an academic essay; . know how to plan and write effective paragraphs.
Remember,if you want to write a successfulacademicessay,you need to have the following: .
an outlineplan
.
a clear structure
.
a strong introduction
.
logicaland meaningfulparagraphs
.
a developmentof an argumentor discussion
.
a conclusion
The organisationof your essaywill dependto some extenton what sort of essayyou are writing.The body of your essay can be arrangedin various logicalways, for example: .
Reasonsfor and reasonsagainst
.
Causesfollowed by effects
o
Problemsfollowedby solutions
Paragraphorganisation
IE
a)
Eachmain idea shouldbe presentedseparatelyin a new paragraph.
b)
Eachparagraphin the body of your essaywill usuallybeginwith a topic sentencesiating the main idea of the paragraph.
c)
The topic sentenceshould be followed by severalsentenceswhich support the main idea.
d)
To add supportor evidence,you should use examples,figuresor statistics.
e)
You shouldalwaysuse quotationsto suppotl your ideas.
f)
You should have a strongconcludingsentencein each paragraphto link the readerback to the topic sentenceor providea link to the next paragraphor section.
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Thefirstepisodein the Coca-Colastoryis an importantpartof the riseof capitalismin the UnitedStates of America.Towardsthe end of the nineteenthcentury,Americagraduallybeganto transformitselffrom a nationof farmersto a city-basedindustrialised society.The industrialrevolutionwasepitomisedby new communications and the arrivaland spreadof the railways. Thisproduceda new kind of capitalism,a distinctiveAmericanvarietywherethe ethoscentredfirmly on the imageof individual immigrantstruggle. Theworld of US business was on its way.One of the mostimportantchangeswhich helpedbusiness success waspopulation growth.TheAmericanpopulation almostdoubledin size between1880 and 1910,and a largeproportionof the increase was createdby the new immigrants from Europeand the restof the world. Success camefrom ambitionand hardwork, and anybodycould makelargeamountsof moneyprovidedthey tried hardenough.Helpedby the success of some, immigrants flockedto the USA.By 1890,therewerealreadyover4,000Americanmillionaires and AndrewCarnegie, who had madea fortunefrom railwaysand iron and steel,was spreading the "Cospel of Wealth".Therewere,however,somedisadvantages to the new business environment. In manyparts of the USA,therewas morethan an elementof the Wild West.Conmen,thievesand swindlerscameto the new townswhich were appearing,lookingfor suitablevictims.A secondmajordisadvantage was thatCokewasoriginallya patentmedicine,and only abouttwo percentof the medicines whichwere producedeverbecamewell-known- mostinventorsand salesmen failedmiserably. Thirdly,although largeprofitscould be madefrom all kindsof medicines,manyof which oftencostalmostnothingto produce,by the late1880sthe marketfor medicineswasalreadysaturated. Patentmedicines, therefore, were not an easycommercialareato breakinto.Anotherimportantaspectof the storyis that the world of medicinewas not advanced atthistime.Nineteenth-centuryAmerican doctorswerenor numerous, nor werethey very good (anaesthetics were still to be inventedand someof the primitivemethodsused by the medicalprofession wereterrifying,killingmorepatientsthanthey saved). Thiswasthe reason why manypeopleturnedto alternative remedies, the so-calledpatentmedicines, to solvetheir health problems.By the end of the century,therewerethousands of cureson offerfor everyimaginable ailment,fromthe commoncold to malaria,all of which requiredextensive advertising in newspapers and publicplacesto promotetheirsuperiorvaluesovertheircompetitors. To conclude,it is not surprising that manywould-betycoonswereattractedby the risingnumbersof consumers and that the field of patentmedicineswas an attractivestartingpoint for some.In 1869,Dr JohnPemberron, a Ceorgiapharmacist, had movedto Atlantasearching to makehis fortuneby the discoveryof the perfect patentcure.In 1886,afterlongyearsof research, he finallylaunchedhis new invention. lt was intothis very crowdedand overcompetitive marketthat Coca-Colawasto emergeas a highlysuccessful product.
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=3 YASI( A Linkingwords and phrases It is importantto develop and link your ideas in each paragraphso the readercan follow your line of argumentclearly.The Coca-Colaessay uses words and phrasesto help the readerfollow the sequenceof events. g.J
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Firstly Secondly Thirdly Fourthly Finally
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Showingsimilarity Comparingor contrasting Adding something Givingreasons Showing cause and effect Givingan example l**t*: There is a large variety of link words and there are complex rules regardingtheir use. You should consult your tutor on a good source of referenceto learn more about how to use them effectively.
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Task:EssayWriting- L:*il * - T=* **dg *f qi:* =s€==
The topic sentenceand supportingsentences The topic sentenceis usuallyat the beginningof a paragraph,but it does not haveto be. When you write a paragraph,you shouldtry to developthis initialidea and not changeor add too many new ideas. The benefitsof immigration t o i n d u s t r i a l i s e cdo u n t r i e s .
a) lmmigrationis a very difficult subjectto discussbecausethere are many possibledifferentviewpoints.
b)
One of the majorproblemsof immigration is that peoplein the hostcountrymaydisagree with such a policy. c) lmmigrationcan offerseveralclearadvantages for industrialised countries.
Example A Thereare obviousadvantagesto learningEnglishin Britain.Everyday thereare opportunitiesto practiselisteningto and speakingwith Britishpeople.In the first place,studentscan experiencethe culturefirst-hand,which is a greathelp when tryingto understandthe language.This is especially true if they chooseto live with a Britishfamilyas exchangestudents,for example.In addition,if studentsattenda languageschoolfull-time,the teacherswill be nativespeakers.In this case, not only will students'speakingand listeningskillsimprove,but attentioncan be givento developing readingand writingskillsas well. Example B lmmigrationto industrialised countriesposesa numberof difficultchallengesfor incomingfamilies. They may need to learna new language,they may face racismand discrimination and they frequentlyhave problemsadjustingto the new culture.In France,for example,it is illegalfor Muslim schoolgirlsto wear headscarvesto school.Already,five Muslimschoolgirlshave been expelledfrom schoolfor wearingheadscarves. The ban is perceivedby many as intolerant,underminingthe integrationof France'sMuslims.Feministssay the lslamicscarf is a repressivesymbol,but many FrenchMuslimssay the ban is racistand againsttheir humanrights."Everyonehas the rightto freedomof thought,conscienceand religion;this right includesfreedomto manifesttheir religionor beliefin teaching,practice,worshipand observance"(Article18, The UniversalDeclarationof HumanRights).'
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E3 3.3
There are three thesis statements below. Write a topic sentence for each of them. Then write a suppoding sentence or two for the paragraph. Remember to focus on the main idea. The first has been done for you.
A) Thesis statement
Paragraph1 Topicsentence
Supportingsentence(s)
B) Thesis statement Whatis the focushere?
peopte ulho live af horne rrrhite studging at Y-€ univer5itS Y]6ve *vecat advantages.
First of all, tkreq can focr:g on theic sludies rr#hout dorrbing abouf domestic matters. SJudents tiving arrn3 fronr knme have to learn hor..l 'fo do -their oun laundrS and ma3 uoell have to shop and cooV- la fnemselves. Those ulho live af horne do naf have such ccllc.e(ns.
of globat darming trrilt be Tkre catres and effec+s brief! ouHined in thig essatj.
Paragraph 1 Topic sentence
Supportingsentence(s)
C) Thesis statement Whatis the focushere?
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Paragraph 1 Topic sentence
Supportingsentence(s)
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a) How would you structureyour essay?e.g.,Feasonsfor and reasonsagainst, causes followed by effects, problems followed by solutions b) What are the main pointsthat you would includein the essay? c) What sort of researchwill you haveto do on this topic? 1) Thereis too much advertisingon television. 2l Discussthe advantagesand disadvantages of Englishas a world language. 3) How has educationimprovedover the last one hundred years? 4l Marketingis the most imporlantaspect of a business's activities.Discuss. 5) Everyindividualhas a responsibility to preventglobalwarming.
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4.3
Choose one title and make a plan for it, listing the topics you would cover in each paragraph'
4.4
practise writing the first paragraph for your essay. Make sure you staft with a clear topic sentence"
Task:Ersay Wiling - Unit3 - Thebody ef lhe essay
tariesand rsions At the end of this unit you will: . have a clear idea of how to finish an academic essay with a successful conclusion.
The main aim of the conclusionis to show the readerthat you have successfullyansweredthe questionthat was set. lt does not includeany new information,but it summarisesthe main pointsmade in the body of the essay.lt shoulddraw your argumentto a close and it also needsto link back to the thesisstatementin vour introduction.
Restatingthe thesis You needto repeatthe main ideasin the conclusion,but you do not want to simplywrite the same sentencesagain.One way of linkingback to the thesisstatementis to rewriteit (thatis, to paraphrasethe ideasand the language). You can use synonymsto do this, or you can rearrangethe order and also change some of the grammar.
Lackof investment in publictransport is havingserious consequences for travellers in Britaintoday;thisis the maioroointthatwill be discussed in this essay.
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Rewrite the sentence, using synonyms and different word order to make a good concluding statement. Think about the grammar that needs to change {e.9.,willbe is not appropriate for a conclusion).
t I TaSk ? Organisingthe concludingparagraph 2.',|
Rearrangethe following sentences to form an effective conclusion for an essay on the topic of Urban overcrowding.
problems
a)
these aimed at solving Government policies only often verv simp]e measures that offer
b)
In
c)
and offers conditions It is a model which aims for improved social whatever their number. for city dwellers, of life a high quality
d)
This essay has argued for the implementation policy an economically which needs to provide model of city design. resource-efficient
e)
help to of such a model will The creation problems of urban life. and future current
conclusion,
urban
overcrowding
are too solutions. short-term
causes problems
on all
levels.
of a long-term sustainable,
resolve
many of
the
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TaSk 3 rinish with a clearstatement Rememberthat your conclusionneeds to be clear and relevantto the questionyou are answering.A strong conclusionshould refer back to the introduction.ldeally,it needs to leavea strong impressionon the reader. 3.1
Read the following thesis statement and the concluding sentences of the same essay. Discuss the following questions. a) What is the subject of the essay?Think of a title for it. b) How is ihe conclusionsimilarto and differentfrom the introduction?
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Tark: Erray Wriling- Unit4 - Summariesand conclusions
Thesis statement: The growth of a 'fast food' culturein this countryhas generated unexpectedproblems,includingrisingobesity levelsand, more importantly,the loss of our gastronomicheritage.This essaywill examine the role of fast food in the developmentof an increasingly unhealthyBritain. Conclusion:Fastfood outletscannotentirerv be blamedfor our increasingly unhealthy dietary habits.Fast food evidentlyrespondsto a need in our modern society,and reflects changesin our modernlifestyle.lt is, rather, our lifestylewhich needschangingif we hope to becomea healthiernation.
Advanfages
Disadvantages
- Task:EssayWriling
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T 4.1
Lecturerexpectations Tutors and lecturers have clear ideas of what they want to see in the conclusion to an academic essay. Look at the list below and check that you understand the expectations. ldentify whether you think you are strong or weak in these areas. ;r:ti:
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slyle Hcademic and regisler At the end of this unit you will: . be more familiar with the language of essays and able to identify some of the features of academic style; . have practised using formal, objective language.
Formalor informalregister? Academicessaysusuallyrequirea formalstyle.You need to rememberwhat to avoid in an academicessay.
fnformal/spoken: Geography? Well, I think it's basically just some sort of mix of physical and social sciences and how they interact together. You know, like, for example, how global warming has an effect on the economy, um, of a region ... but you can also look at these things individually too ... er ... so you could just study things like sea-levelrisewhich'd be physical,oryou could look at ... say ... how people, human beings,adapt themselvesto the environment,that's human. Formal/written: Geographyis the study of the surface of the Earih, the location and distribution of its physical and cultural features,and the interrelationof these featuresas they affect humans. ln the study of geography,two main branches may be distinguished,physical geographyand human geography.
Informat/spoV-en examples
?ea+oce ons, Use ol contra . isnt, dont, Use ol fillerg, Vr)ell,ec, elc. Use of
pds3lve
volce
Impersonal and ob1ective Pergonal and subiective Punctu
eB
Task:EssayWdling -
on
Format/uor
n exarnpleg
a) | don't believethis is true at all. lt soundslike nonsense. b) New regulationswill come into effect next year. c) The study was conductedwith a group of school-agechildren. d) We'redefinitelygoingto haveto followthose stupid new rulesnext year. e) Furtheranalysisis requiredbeforeconclusionscan be drawn. D
lt reallypuzzlesme why some studentsdon't get bettergrades.
g) Our experimentswere OK - they just provedthat his argumentdidn't stand up. h) He'll haveto havea betterlook at the findingsbeforemakinghis mind up. i)
lt has been provedthat the claimsare unfounded.
j)
We went down to a school and chattedwith some of the kids.
k) lt isn't clearwhy quite a lot of studentsdon't get reallygood grades. l)
A majoraspectof the investigationinvolvedresearchinto socialhousingtrends.
Gautiouslanguage Anothertypicalfeatureof academicwritingis the need to be carefulor cautious.Unlessyou are quotinga fact or a statistic,or there is evidence '100% which shows certainty,statementsand conclusionsare often qualifiedin some way to make them less assediveor positive.The reasonis partlyEnglishacademicstyle,but it is also to avoid makingany false claims.This use of cautiouslanguageis sometimescalled'hedging'.
l,.r::,-l I ;li
A } D Some collegesand universitiesin this countryhave largenumbersof internationalstudents. ii Some collegesand universitiesin this countryappearto have largenumbersof international students.
B ) i ) Insteadof coming here,international studentsshouldstudy in their own country. i D It could be arguedthat, insteadof coming here,internationalstudentsshouldstudy in their own counrry.
c ) D This is a misapplicationof governmentpolicy. i D This would seem to be a misapplicationof governmentpolicy.
e9
=5 D) i) This is true. ii) To a certain extent, this may be true. E) i) Erlichman'sfindingsprovethat the amountof independentstudy is directlyrelatedto higher oerformancelevels. ii) Erlichman'sfindingssuggestthat the amountof independentstudy might be directlyrelated to higherperformancelevels. F) i) Inflationwill not rise next year. ii) Evidenceindicatesthat inflationwill probablynot rise next year. don't like learningmoreforeign G) i) The surveydemonstratesthat Englishschoolchildren languages. are apparentlynot in favourof ii) The surveytends to indicatethat Englishschoolchildren learningmore foreignlanguages. H) i) Thereare situationswherethis is the only solution. ii) Thereare undoubtedlysituationswherethis would seem to be the only possiblesolution.
Exampte
Hedging fea+oce hedging
Some colleges
vecbs
appeaf
to
have
Use of modal vecbs
Qualif3ing
exP( e3 3lon3
hc^ec+lves and adverbg
Se-l exp(es3lons
""ltrw, Wffi Registerin use that are inappropriatefor formal written InformalEnglishuses everydayspoken forms (colloquialisms) writing. English.lt is importantnot to mix stylesin academic .l]it.i'i.if.:::i1,|.i:.-!il;ji,..ii:..]{l,,:i.itl''ji.;...
l,.-:i.::i.:::li,n:{1':.;i:il{:i.;:lljil;.::iif'-:ilir..i,i;l.:Fi:ij:gi.l:;.:t::lql;::lt ricii]!+F]i:t': Iiif+';{jt{lf{* q';r'i. il.o,l:.r-',:,;-'i,:!:liiliY''f;::itli l['+g'=
30
Task: Ersay Wdting - ii*!t * itr**qq::r*
6i1rlq +n# ,frllesir*t
- wasmorepeoplearrivingin the USA.Therewere A massive change- one which reallyhelpedbusiness two timesas manypeoplewho got herebetween1880 and 1910,and lotsof them camefrom all sortsof differentplaceslike Europe.lf you wantedto be successful you had to work reallyhard;however,you could get rich quicklyif you did this. Lotsof immigrantsmadeit and becauseof this, lotsmorewannabe millionaires turnedup in the US.By 1890,Americamaybehad around4,000millionaires. One of the bestwasAndrewCarnegie, who got rich throughtrainsand iron and steel.His message was calledthe 'Cospelof Wealth'.
a
vocabulary appropriate and grammatical structures;
a
(Unit5, Task2, page29). cautiouslanguage
Anotherkind of usefulalternative fuel is electricity. Thisisn'treallya veryefficientfuel rightnow,because the technologyis somewhatlimited;however,it'sfair to saythat recentadvancesin the productionof electriccarscould maybemakethis a realityin the future.But it is possiblefor carspoweredwith electricityto releaselittleor no emissions, so if we want thisalternative fuel to becomea reality,we'll needit in lotsof cars.Maybethen it'll makesomesortof a difference.If we want thisto happen,i.e.,to knocka big chunkout of the pollutionproblemall aroundthe world,it'll takea while.
- Task:EssayWriling
3l
Sludenlnoles tor Unil5
Euidelines for lhe fulure At the end of this unit you will: o understand the editing and redrafting processes in essay writing; r have a clearer understanding of what lecturers expect from a piece of academic writing.
Thingsto remember
a
understanding the task
a
checkingthe title carefully
a
answeringthe questionset
a
getting organised
a
keepingto deadlines
a
writinga plan
a
collectingand recordingsourcesand important information
a
keeping useful phrasesand examplesof "essay language"
a
reflectingon what you have written
a
checkingand redraftinglanguageand content
a
writinga final draft
a
presentingyour essay in a clear and acceptableform
a;s'{+1+b
Redrafting
number Of crimes
Da-rch prrrrc'tua-t'iorr
- Task:EssayWriling
33
=5 a) How many draftsof an essayshouldyou write? b) What do you need to considerand work on when you redraftan essay?
Redra
ng: +hing5 to
r.oorL on
Consider
ong
paragcaphs . .
eaclrt ParagfaPh Pa(a3faPh5 afe
ha.= a main idea in the
fi
o(de(
gfammar
ten
of essa3
Rememberthat your mark will depend not only on how good your writingis, but also on how successfully you have completed the task. lt is importantto make sure you read and understandthe feedback that your lecturergivesyou to help you with your next essay.lt is also importantto understandthe markingcriteria.
34
T a s k : E s s a Y W r i l i n g -: r
i - r' :!:::: :
i-r
For instance,robbery might be decreasedwhereasmurder has increasedso the
their performancein a positiveway. cet? - this
is rather
good ro includeeg
a oeneralisation!
a) You havewrittena competentanswer,but unfortunatelyit is an answerto a differentquestion! b) Youressaywould be improvedby checkingthe grammarand spelling. c) You have answeredthe questionvery well; you show a good understanding of the issuesand have providedsome excellentexamples. d) Thereis littleevidencein the essayof reflectiveand evaluativethought.Yourconclusionis rather weak. e) The essayneedsto be word-processed- in general,the presentationis very poor. fl
You have made good use of personalreflectionand have clearlydone a lot of background readingon the topic.
g) You havedescribedthe situationwell but have not analysedthe advantagesand disadvantages as the questionaskedyou to do.
7O%o+
60-69% 50-59o/o
4049%
30-39%
- Task:EssayWriling
35
Mark
Marking criteria ideasgenerallynot made clearand often irrelevant;weak paragraphs;small rangeof vocabulary;grammaticalstructureis very limited limitedrange ideasgenerallyclear but not alwaysvery relevant;some lack of paragraphing; of vocabulary;limitedgrammaticalstructureat times
useveryweak; of ideas;vocabulary or development organisation lacksanysatisfactory pass generally the required to meet fails grammatical structure; use of unsatisfactory standard clear paragraphswith well-expressedideas;wide rangeof excellenttext organisation; vocabulary;good use of grammaticalstructure good text organisation with generallyrelevantideas;adequaterangeof vocabularyand orammaticalstructure
A model essay
Essay title: Discussthe problemsassociatedwith urban overcrowdingand evaluatepossiblesolutions.
a) How does the writerarouseyour interest? b) What is the thesisstatement? lntroduction: The twentiethcenturysaw a majorincreasein the world'spopulationand at the sametime the emergenceof a globalsocietydrivenby the forcesof economicsand industry.Peoplewere inexorablydrawn towardslivingin towns and cities,migratingfrom ruralcommunitiesout of economicnecessity.As a resultof this influx,modern-daycitiesacrossthe globeface serious unemployment, problemsdue to overcrowding.The most criticalincludepovertyand homelessness, the provisionof adequatehealthcareand education,and knock-oneffectssuch as risingcrime and pollution.The purposeof this essayis to identifysolutionsto some of these problemsof urban overcrowdingand attemptto evaluatetheirfeasibility.
3E
lask: EssayWriling
- -r
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l}*ii,,1-.{ idi.'-: - --i:vq,-:
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Main body: Urbanovercrowdingis not a recentphenomenon,but it has recentlybecomea globaldemographic problem.The rise of the world's 'Megacities'such as Tokyo,Jakafta,Sdo Pauloand Cairo,with populationsapproaching20 million,is one of the most markedtrendsof recentdecades.In 1950 for example,New YorkCity was uniqueamongthe world'scitiesin havingmorethan 10 million inhabitants.By 1975 that numberhad grown to 15 million. By 2015 it is estimatedit will reach 21 million.(UNO2005).Two principalreasonsfor this phenomenoncan be identified,one economic and the othersociocultural. Peoplemigrateto the citiesin searchof both economicsecurityand improvedsocialconditions. As the economy of a nation develops,its cities develop as centres of industry investmentand education,providingplentifuljobopportunitiesfor those in searchof a higherstandardof living. Sydney,Sdo Pauloand Frankfurtare all thrivingmoderncitieswhich have developedexponentially sincethe SecondWorldWar.A fudher exampleis Tokyo,the hub for Japan'srapid economic developmentin the 1960sand 70s; its populationgrew quicklyas peoplemovedthereto find employment,and it is now the most populouscity in the world (population35.3 million). Not all developingnations,however,are equippedto cope with such rapidlyexpandingcity populations.The overridingproblem associatedwith overcrowdingis poverty and its attendant socialdeprivations- homelessness, unemploymentand insecurity.lmmigrantsto citiesfrom rural areas are typicallythe poorest membersof urban society,and in many cities are often forced to live in shantytownsor slumson the peripheryof the city withoutaccessto cleandrinkingwater or safe sanitation,in crampedand unsanitaryconditions.Examplesof such poor livingconditionscan be seen across the continents,from Caracasto Bombay.Unemploymentis widespreadas familiesfight to survive.Transmission of infectiousdiseasesis very common in such conditions,resultingtoo frequentlyin high infant mortalityrates (UNESCO2002).Furthermore,access to vital social services such as hospitalsand schools may be restrictedas authoritiestry to cope with large numbersof people,thus denyingchildrenadequateeducationand healthcare. Inevitably, there is no one best solutionto a problemof such magnitude.Two solutionsare proposed, both of which seek to move people away from the cities. The first is that of resettlement, wheregovernment-ledhousinginitiativesseek to rehousefamilieson the outskirtsof cities.The Shanghaihousingresettlementproject,begun in 1987,is an exampleof successfulurbanrenewal where livingconditionshave been measurablyimproved.Resolutionof the housingshorlagehas promotedlong-termsocialdevelopmentand stability,resultingin socialand economicbenefits.This measuredoes not, however,addressthe problem of urban sprawl as the city spreadsoutwards, but it does relievethe pressureof urban overcrowding. The second solution encouragesthe relocationof businesses,factoriesand warehousesto rural areas.lt exploitsbrownfieldsites in the countrysidewhich are developedas businessparks.Policies of industrialrelocationhave been successfulin Canadaand the UK. where industrialexpansionof citieshas been curtailed.However,peopleare not willingto leavethe citiesunlessthey are guaranteedbetterhousing,schoolsand transportfacilities,so long-termgovernmentinvestmentin these areas is crucial. Furthermore,such projectsare disputed by environmentalists,who see the developmentsas a threatto the balanceof the countryside. a) Underlinethe topic sentencein each paragraphin the text and make a note of its key words below. b) How much support does the writer give for the topic sentencein each paragraph?Make a note (key words) of the support below.
,J.i;i * - *r*lfieirne* {*r ifg* ii.l*ure - Task: Essay Wriling
37
Paragraph 1
Support examplesand evidence:
Paragraph2 Topicsentencekeywords:
Supportexamplesand evidence:
Paragraph 3 Topic sentencekey words:
Supportexamplesand evidence:
Paragraph 4 Topic sentencekey words:
Support examplesand evidence
Paragraph5 Topicsentencekeywords:
Support examplesand evidence:
38
fark: Essly Writlng- llnil 6 - 'Euidelinesfor lhe fulure
a) describethe situationand causes b) suggestsolutions c) describethe problems
a) ls thereany new informationin the conclusion? b) How does the conclusionlink back to the introduction? Conclusion: In conclusion,urbanovercrowdingcausesproblemson all levels.Governmentpoliciesaimed at solving these problemsare too often simple stopgap measuresofferingonly short-termsolutions. This essayhas arguedfor the implementation of a long-termpolicythat potentiallyprovidesan economicallysustainable,resource-efficient model of city design.lt is a modelthat fulfilsa universal desirefor improvedsocialconditionsand ultimatelyoffersa high qualityof lifefor city dwellers, whatevertheir number. 4"S
L**k t*r**g*t tF"t*wh*i* *s$€*F*r** d**d{"$*1€vir*i'# ge.:r:***l* *e;*k* a:h:=::l**sfre}lt.t**s*rt*Li* *c: m*r* **rstl**x 3te**gi;':g ieetg**g*" Bfrit* y*ur r*i***'rg*sin €h* tarhS*i**l*.,+..
Change
m
To
- Tark: Ersay Writing ijs*gff - S**3**lielss fs. l*e f*;lqJF€
39
TaSk 5 write an essayoutline The sample essay in Task 1 was an example of the Situationmodel (seeUnit 3, page 17). Problem-solution-Response 5.1
Preparean essay outline for the following essay question (or one of the other questions in this module). Follow the stePs below
Engtishhasbecomea globallanguagebecauseit is both easyto learnand superiorto otherlanguages'Discuss. Analysethe question:Howmanygeneralstatements arethere?Whatis the maininstructionverb? fromUnit o Brainstorm ideasusingoneof thetechniques 1,Task3, page19.
.
o Writea thesisstatementto showhowyourargumentwill developthroughthe essay' . Decidewhichessaypatternto use(Unit3, page20). you will use. o Linkyour ideasintoa logicalsequenceand decidehow manyparagraphs Writea topic statementfor eachparagraph. o Notethe supportingevidenceand examplesfor eachof your mainpoinis. if you areincludingquotations. . Referto TASKModule10: Research and Referencing,
.
5.2
Discussyour essayoutlinesin smallgroups'
SludenlnolesForUnitE
40
Tark: Erray Wrlling- UnitE - Euidelineslor lhe fulure
MsduleI Webwork ABC of academic writing and essays http :l/www.md x.ac.uk/WWWSTUDYlgioess.htm#p ians Review This is part of a guide for students at the Universityof Middlesex.lt gives comprehensiveexplanations of terms and examplesof essaytypes and sections. Task Note down usefulwords and terms connectedwith essay writing, together with their definitions.
Andy Gillett's academic writing http://wlvw.uefap.com/rvriting/writfrarn.hrir Review This is a very useful study skills site written by Andy Gillett at the Universityof Hertfordshire. Task This link takes you to the writing section.Try the exercisesat the end of each section,then check your answers.Beginwith Understanding the Questionand apply your knowledgefrom this module.
Exlensionaclivilies
Expandone of your essayoutlinesinto a full essay.Althoughyou may havea numberof essaysto write over the year,it is usefulto write one immediatelyon completingthis module. You can completeone that you have been workingon in this module,or choosean areato write about that you are particularlyinterestedin.
Terkr Esrey Mlllng
4l
I Msdrule ffilErEffy A*ad*r*i* writfng {r:}Writing that students and academicsproduce.lt normallyinvolves research,demonstrateslearningor knowledge and followsclear conventionsin its style and organisation.For example,essays and assignments,reports,disseftations,theses. Arg*m*nt e$say {n} An essaythat involvesbuilding a case for an idea or thesis statement.This eniails giving reasonsfor your thesis statement and providingevidenceto back it up. &n**y** {u} To break an issue down into parts in orderto study,identifyand discusstheir meaning and/or relevance. &**FytleaFe***y inl An essaythai involves analysinga text, theory or set of ideas. *r*inst*rn: {v} The act of writing down all the thoughtsand ideasyou haveabout a topic withoutstoppingto monitor,edit or organise them. Brainstormingis a creativeprocessthat can be done aloneor in a group. **ll*qr"ri*l i*di} Used to describeinformalspoken words and expressionsused in conversation,or informalwritten languageused in lettersto friendsand familyor e-mails.For example,in 'Don't BritishEnglish,a colloquialway of saying 'Don't get in a tizz!' be annoyed!'would be Sraft {n} {v} 1 (n)An early version of a piece of academicwritingthat is used as the starting point for further work. 2 (v)To create an early version of an essay,knowing that you will go back afterwardsand develop and edit your languageand ideas. *eadline {n} The date or time by which an assignmentor projectneedsto be completed. *escriptive essay {n} An essay that describesa processor sequenceof events ratherthan arguing,interpretingor evaluating. trdit {v} To select,rearrangeand improvematerialto make it more suitablefor its final purpose.Editing materialinvolvesreorganisingit, correctingerrors, improvingthe wordingor contentand changing its length,by addingsectionsor iakingthem out.
4?
Task:Essaylllriling
€v*5r**t* {v} To assess informationin terms of quality,relevance,objectivityand accuracy. €v*i**€iv* *ssay {n} An essay that requiresyou to eithercompareand evaluatea rangeof things in relationto one another,or to look at the argumentsfor and againstone thing, and come to a judgmentin your conclusion.lt is askingfor your personalopinion,backed up with facts, examplesand explanations. Ex*n':ptifu{viTo illustratea belief,statementor theory with examples.You may be asked to do this in an essay. Fr** writir":g{v} To write without deliberateor consciousthoughtso that ideasflow freely. This is sometimesdone as an exerciseto stimulateideas and creativityin preparationfor a written assignment. Ftedging {*} The use of deliberatelyvague, uncertain languagein order to avoid asseftingsomethingas a fact that may not be true. In the context of academicwriting,hedginglanguageis often used to discusstheoriesand possiblesolutions. Key skEll{s':iA skillthat it is importantto masterin order to be successfulin a certain area (such as academiclife or employment). Markir:g *rit*ri* {tt} A list of criteriaor qualitiesthat the personwho marksan assignmentor exam is lookingfor, includingaspectsof the style, presentationand organisationof the work. For example,one criterionfor an assignmentthat is graded above 70% (a first) is likelyto be that it must includeoriginalideas. Mind inap {r*}A diagramused to representwords, ideas,tasks or other items linkedto, and arranged radiallyaround,a central key word or idea *bje*tiv* {*dj} it"t}1 (adj)An opinion or idea that is not influencedby personalfeelingsor emotions. 2 (n)The aim, or what you want to achievefrom an activity. *utfi** {*} A brief plan that shows the order in which you will deal with the main issuesor ideas in a piece of academicwriting.
To alter a piece of text so that you restateit (concisely)in differentwords without changingits meaning.lt is usefulto paraphrase when writinga summaryof someone'sideas;if the sourceis acknowledged,it is not plagiarism. It is also possibleto paraphraseyour own ideas in an essayor presentation; that is, to state them again, often in a clearer,expandedway. An essay that asks " you to describeand draw conclusionsabour somethingthat you have experienced. . . To readthrougha piece of writing and pick out and correcterrorsin it. lt is usefulto ask someoneelse to proofreadyour work. This shouldbe done beforethe finaldraft of a oieceof academicwriting is submitted. To write out a new draft of an essay, incorporatingchangesand makingadditions. This is done afteryou have readthrough,edited and/or had feedbackon the first draft. '
, , 1(n)Acknowledgmentofthe sourcesof ideasand informationthat you use in writtenwork and oral presentations. 2 (v)To acknowledgeor mentionthe sourcesof information. . , .,r , ,, , An essaythat involvesthinking about a statementor idea and decidingwhether you agreewith it, and givingreasonsfor your decision. ,:i ,
, The style of speechor writingthat is used in a specific context and/or by a specific group of people.For example,a studentwill use a very informal,colloquialregisterto text or email a friend,but a formalscientificregisterto write a chemistry report. '
i . , To paraphraseor say somethingagain in a differentway.This is often done in essaysto help clarifyan idea or issue.The conclusionof an essaywill often restatethe originalthesis statementin more deoth.
Something(usuallya book, articleor other text)that suppliesyou with information. In an academiccontext,sourcesused in essaysand reportsmust be acknowledged. ,'1(n)Aframeworkor arrangementof severalpafts, put togetherin a parlicularway.2 (v) In academicwriting,to put togetherideas,argumentsor thoughtsin an organised,logicalway. lt is imporlantto structureessaysand presentationsas you work on them. Describesan idea or opinion that is basedon someone'spersonalopinion ratherthan on observablephenomena. Informationfrom academicsourcesthat should be includedin a piece of academicwriting.This evidence illustratesand backs up your ideasand adds 'academicweight' your to work. i Sentencesthat usuallyfollow and systematically developthe idea containedin the tooic sentence. ., A word or phrasewhich has a ' i similarmeaningto anotherone and can replaceit in a sentencewithoutchangingthe meaningof the sentence. A methodor way of doing something.For example,it is possibleto learn usefultechniquesfor answeringexam questions. :, r :r, .Astatementthatexplains the controllingidea or main argument(thesis) in a piece of academicwriting.lt is stated in the introductionand supportedby reasonsin the body of the essay. A sentencethat states and sometimessummarisesthe topic/mainidea of the paragraphand the standpointtaken by the writer.lt usuallycomes at the beginningof each paragraph.
TaskrEssayWriling
43
Published by Garnet PublishingLtd. 8 SouthernCourt South Street ReadingRG1 4QS, UK Copyright@ 2OO7Garnet PublishingLtd. The right of the Universityof Reading's InternationalFoundation Programmeto be identified as the author of this work has been assefted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrievalsystem, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanicdl, photocopying, recording or otherwise, of the Publisher.Any personwho without the prior.permission does any unauthorizedact in relation to this publication may be liableto criminalprosecutionand civil claimsfor damages. This editionfirst published2007. tsBN 978 1 85964 922 0 Data BritishLibraryCataloguing-in-Publication A cataloguerecordfor this book is availablefrom the British Library. Production Project manager: Project consultant: Editorialteam: Design: Layout: lllustration: Photography:
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